All Eyes On You
by myfailsafe
Summary: AU HS. To hopefully win the heart of a certain pink haired maiden, Naruto pitches the insane idea to cross the line and his clothes. It just so happens he makes a beautiful girl, at least Sasuke thinks. SasuNaru.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One**- Scream Out Loud

**Author's Notes**: I had put up a poll, seeing what everyone wanted. It at midnight… the option 'Finish One, Then Post' won but a single vote. I present to you, my fifth fiction… All Eyes on You.

I know my fans know I'm not a big fan of Sakura, but, I'm trying to be more open-minded in my fanfictions. So, bare with me through this journey to get to the boy lovin'.

**Warnings**: Hm…Foul language (which I could never go without) and cross-dressing, and boys being boys. Crudeness; which I can never forget.

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Naruto, whadda ya know?

**Dedication**: This fiction is first and foremost dedicated to the best friends that I have made and I have grown to absolutely adore thanks to this website.  
Katlyn, Lisa, and Kelly.  
I love them.

**Rating**: I rate by the chapters, even though the entire fiction had been rated.  
**T:** For language and possible sexual themes.

**Chapter One** – Scream Out Loud

* * *

"Look, dude…There she is!"

A tall slender girl, around the age of sixteen began walking around a corner in a serene high class suburban neighborhood. Her hair was short to about halfway down her neck, and not to mention bubblegum pink. Her eye lashes were long and flashy, and perfectly adorned her emerald green eyes. Her frame was thin but perfectly curvy around her hip and bust area, and in her privet school uniform with her short skirt and form fitting white top; every boy who caught a glance drooled.

Haruno Sakura was the most beautiful girl anyone came across as well as her group of friends from Madame Francis's School for Girl's.

The elite all girl's privet school for the highly intelligent or deeply pocketed.

"Don't you think this is considered obsession, or stalking?"

A rustle came from a near by bush as two very desperate and rather obscene boys waited in hiding as Sakura and her two friends came walking, chatting loudly, down the very sidewalk where the bush sat by.

Uzumaki Naruto and Inuzuka Kiba. Two regular 16 year-old juniors at Konoha public high. They lived just outside of the rich part of town where most teens attended privet school, and had wallets bigger than their vocabulary. The two had known each other for quite some time being neighbors for seven years, and Naruto had dragged Kiba on his secret endeavors ever since.

"It's considered browsing…or…window shopping, Kiba. Let it go." Light and bright blue azure eyes turned to glance at the teen called Kiba who was glancing out of the dark bush.

"This is _stalking_, Naruto. Not _browsing_. Browsing is going to the mall." Dark eyes shifted along with the body; the crouching position not exactly comfortable any longer.

"Shh… here they come. Look, that Hinata girl is with them today," Naruto said in hopes it would distract his friend, and it did.

The two teens quieted and stilled as the three girls walked by, chatting and smiling, and completely oblivious to the occupied bush.

"Ino! How can you say that? I would not!" Sakura said with a giggle and a slight blush.

"Yeah, that's why you haven't shut up about him ever since." The blue eyed, blonde haired teen countered.

"I said he was _attractive_. That doesn't mean I would do _all that_."

The three girls quickly continued on their walk to school, their hips swinging, and their skirts swaying. The two teen boys in the bush were practically slobbering at the sight.  
Kiba was the first to come out of his trance, not one to be obsessing over the girl he thought was cute.

"Well, look at that, she likes someone. We can forget about her and move on…" Kiba said attempting to climb out of the bush, but actually stumbling and falling on his face.

Naruto quickly spun around, the last sentence snapping him out of his pervy daze, and causing him to fall flat on his butt.

"She didn't say that!" Naruto screeched, thoroughly annoyed when he discovered a particularly pointy root that pierced his somewhat baggy jeans.

"She said something along those lines. Ino was teasing her about something pretty suggestive too." Kiba said as he stood, dusting off the dirt from the back of his jeans just as Naruto emerged from the bush; leaves stuck in his hair and all.

"Girls don't talk about _that_." Naruto commented as he stood.

Kiba snorted. "So guys are the only ones that talk about sex? What? Were you dropped on your head as a child?"

Naruto was ruffling his own hair desperately trying to get all the leaves that clung to his hair out, but the blonde had time to stop, and give Kiba the dirtiest look he could muster.

"I'm just saying my friend; she was alone with her two closest friends. Girls tell each other everything, and that includes who they want to get down and dirty with."

Naruto lightly shook his head as they two began walking the opposite way the girls had gone, looking a bit rougher than when they had came, and started towards their own school.

"I still don't see her being like that." Naruto commented sticking his hands in his pockets.

Kiba rolled his eyes, "When are you going to let it go? I mean honestly, Naruto, have you ever honestly _talked_ to Sakura."

Naruto ducked his head down as they continued to walk, trying to desperately hide his newly flushed face.

Kiba barked out a laugh to humiliate his friend even more and to cause his face to flush and even darker shade.

"I _have_. I said 'good morning' to her a few times! You were there!" Naruto turned to point his index finger at his best friend's face.

Kiba rolled his eyes with a somewhat sad chuckle. "Yeah, when she barely replied to you with a somewhat mumbled response because she was too busy talking to her friends. When she didn't even notice you. Face it Naruto, you either have to wear a shirt with the Madame Francis's logo on it, or you have to go to that all boys high school…what's it called…?"

Naruto glared with his lips pursed to the side of his mouth, "Academia. The dumbest named high school for smart teen aged boys."

"Well there you have it. Either go to Academia, or grow some tits and tuck your balls and head on in to Madame's hot ass high." Kiba commented crudely.

Naruto made a dismissive noise as the two continued on their route to their school, the two noting they needed to grab their abandoned school bags on their way; they were always in the same spot on Narutos' stoop.

The somewhat chilly breeze nipped at their exposed skin in the early morning hours, the sun barely raised, and their brains barely functioning.

The two spotted Narutos' quaint single family home that sat next to Kiba's; the houses sat just outside of the upper-class neighborhoods where people were more blessed than others.

A tall man was standing on the stoop with the fresh newspaper in hand, spread out in front of his upper half, and leaning against the front door while he read.

"Your dad…" Kiba mumbled, "Will he be mad?"

Naruto shook his head as he watched the man's relaxed position, "most likely proud."

The two turned down the cemented walkway towards the house while catching the man's attention. He wrestling and fiddled as the paper rustled and flared as he desperately tried to fold it down to be able to hold a somewhat normal conversation with his son; as normal as it could be for Kakashi.

"Naruto-kun, Kiba-kun…isn't it a bit early to go girl watching?"

"Aren't you a little young to be gray?" Kiba countered.

Kakashi hummed in wonder, rubbing his chin with his index finger and thumb, "I personally think it adds flair."

Naruto rolled his eyes, digging his hands deeper into his pockets from the embarrassment. "We weren't checking out girls."

"No…It was more along the lines of _stalking_, Kakashi-san. You should talk to this- _huff_!" Naruto elbowed Kiba in the back near the ribs as hard as he possibly could.

Kakashi began to chuckle, lifting himself up from his leaning position and tucking the folded newspaper under his arm. "Well, get your girl anyway you can. Just don't kidnap her. Now get your asses to school."

The boys rushed forward and grabbed their backpacks and rushed off towards their school.

* * *

"Your tie is crooked."

The teen let another dry sigh escape his lips. "Why in the hell should I care?"

His friend shrugged in a rather bored manner as he looked on from an expensive recliner like a spectator, "You're a senior now, Sasuke. You're the president of your class and there is that whole 'lead by example' message you need to remember."

Dark, charcoal eyes looked over a broad left shoulder from a mirrors view with a rather sharp glare, "If you keep pointing out every flaw, we'll never get to that damnable school."

Sasuke reached his pale right hand up and tugged at his black red tie that stuck out against the white shirt and blended with the black blazer.

"Is that _any_ better Shikamaru? Or do you want to just sit here all day?" Sasuke whipped around, a few stray strands of blue-black raven hair slapping his face.

"Actually, that's what I was initially aiming for." The teen said dryly, not bothering to raise his head that was lying back facing the ceiling.

"Get your lazy ass up before Itachi comes in here and lectures us." Sasuke snapped, kicking the chair causing the teen to jerk.

The boy let out a long sigh and slowly got up, his high brunette ponytail a bit askew, and his face showing he seemed to be a bit fatigued; it was technically how he always looked.  
Uchiha Sasuke and Nara Shikamaru. The top two students at Academia privet school both sent there on recommendations and not their parents' checks.

The two made their way down the main left side of the stairs in a large mansion, the Uchiha mansion. A tall hansom man with flawless pale skin and long raven black hair stood at the bottom of the stairs in a crisp black suit ready to get to work.

"You two are running late." His low voice oozed out.

"I think we know that, Itachi." Sasuke commented back to his older brother.

"Shikamaru, are you causing Sasuke to be late again?" Itachi's eyes followed the boys as they slipped their black shoes on by the front door and grabbed their school bags.

Shikamaru smirked, "Of course not."

"That's what I figured. Sasuke, don't cause any trouble, it's your last year at high school and you need to make one last final impression." Itachi said stepping forward and straightening his younger brother's tie.

Sasuke glared up at his brother while yanking himself back, "Can I go now?"

"Of course," Itachi said curtly.

The two teens walked out of the door while squinting at the quickly rising sun, rushing towards Sasuke's car and quickly climbing – somewhat stumbling - in. Sasuke started the car with the quiet engine warming up the car in the background while the two teens situated themselves in the car.

"Are you really ready to deal with it?" Shikamaru questioned while staring dazedly out the window towards the sky.

"Deal with what?"

"All the new girls at Madame Francis's, or did you forget that those girls circle the school like vultures."

"No, actually I try to suppress those memories." Sasuke replied dully.

"Well, you better not, because you're going to need some type of tactic when all those new girls show up. Because like usual, they get a look at you and all hell breaks loose."

* * *

Naruto was rapidly tapping the end of his pencil on his school desk in the middle of second period. His blonde head was resting not-so-comfortably on his hand that caused a cramping sensation in his neck, but he just didn't care to stare forward and pay attention to the rambling teacher who was talking about nothing.

Kiba sat next to the blonde; his head had dropped on his desk five minutes into the period and he had covered his ears with his arms thrown over his head a few minutes later.

Naruto couldn't stop thinking about Sakura. The humiliating comment Kiba had made about not even talking to the girl made Naruto feel completely stupid; he felt he had to prove to Kiba and himself that he could talk to her.

No more hiding in bushes or going to her favorite hangout spots when she went, nope, and if he was called stalker one more time he was going to swing a punch.

Naruto's defense was that he was just shy and he was just waiting for the opportune moment to say something, it just so happens it hadn't come up in the past year. It wasn't like he was peaking through her window or stealing her underwear, Naruto wasn't crazy like _stalkers,_ and he just had a school boy crush on someone he felt like he didn't have a chance in hell with.

But he planned on making it to at least the point of talking to her.

The only problem was how.

He figured that he could approach her at the mall which was a common and public spot, or run into her walking on the way to school; purposely walking ahead and then walking back.

Naruto sighed. She would probably make up some excuse about being late for class so she wouldn't have to bother talking to him. Naruto couldn't help but think '_if only I was a girl like Kiba said…It would be so much easier, and especially if I was in her group of friends from her school…_'

Naruto chuckled to himself at the mental picture. His hair covered by some horribly long and gross wig, in some stupid and uncomfortable skirt that was apart of a bad school uniform. Worst of all, that just topped the horrible vision, was Naruto envisioning himself wearing a stuffed bra.

Naruto shook his head with another soft chuckle, the thought seeming ridiculous.

Kiba had raised his head from hearing his friends' soft laugher thinking he had missed the boring teacher actually say something funny, "What's so amusing? All I'm hearing is bullshit from that dolt." Kiba pointed his thumb towards the front.

"Oh, no, I was just thinking about Sakura and how-"

"Oh for crying-out-loud!" Kiba whispered harshly trying to resist the urge not to drop his head roughly. "Can you not at least _think_ about her for five minutes? You can't even talk to her!"

"You two back there! Inuzuka and Uzumaki! Pay attention!" The usually dull teacher snapped grabbing the boy's attention as they were leaning across the aisle to whisper.  
The two slowly rested back into their seats and began to whisper without moving as soon as the teacher began to ramble on.

Naruto began to speak out of the side of his mouth while he looked forward. "That's what I was trying to tell you, I was thinking about how I can talk to her."

Kiba snorted as he rested his head on his hand not daring to lay his head back down. "Really? That humorous, what brilliant scheme have you come up with now?"

"Cross dressing as a Madam Francis's student." Naruto suggested somewhat jokingly, trying to remind Kiba of what he had said earlier.

But Kiba barely hearing the joke and only hearing Naruto sounding somewhat serious, Kiba reacted a little louder than he wanted.

"WHAT!?"

* * *

Kakashi stood idly against the dining room wall as the two teens sat at the table bickering back and forth.

"It was your damn fault!" Kiba snapped again.

"Bullshit! You were the dumb idiot who shouted!" Naruto exclaimed while pointing his finger at the other teen across the table.

"Alright, alright. Since I had to pick _both_ of you up from school since your parents are at work, I'd like to hear what this is completely about." Kakashi stated firmly getting the two to settle them into glaring.

"Kiba, why don't you start first?" Kakashi asked as he slowly pulled out a chair and took a seat.

"What!? I'm your son!"

"And that's why I want to give your friend a fair chance. It would seem like I would be favoring you."

"Yeah, so wait your damn turn!"

"Alright, now it's your turn Naruto." Kakashi said calmly.

"Wait – what!?" Kiba exclaimed.

"Oh, you had your turn, now its Naru-chan's turn." Kakashi smiled toward the teen warmly.

"He's the idiot who yelled and got us suspended for the day!"

"And he's the idiot who made me yell!"

"Alright…now, why was there yelling? Were you two bickering like two little school girls like you are now?" Kakashi questioned with a grin.

"Oh geez! Don't mention school girls!" Kiba exclaimed dropping his head down onto the table immediately.

Kakashi gave the boy a rather odd look, "Oh, but I was under the impression that was your favorite topic."

Kiba didn't bother lifting his head as his voice was muffled as it was smashed against the small wooden table, "Not anymore, thanks to your son."

Kakashi turned to give his son a rather disapproving look, "What did you do to ruin that topic? I was under the impression you loved it yourself."

"Oh he loves it alright… Go ahead Naruto; tell your dad your plan." Kiba lifted his head giving Naruto a somewhat disapproving look.

"Plan?" Kakashi's eyes suddenly showed a certain gleam as he turned towards his son.

"Yeah, well you know that girl I've mentioned-"

"Mentioned? You mean Haruno Sakura, the most popular girl at Madame Francis's. She's sixteen-years-old, five feet and two inches tall, and weighs in at just over a hundred pounds. She's in her junior year of high school and according to you she's a Greek Goddess. But you've only mentioned her." Kakashi finished sarcastically.

Naruto gave his father a somewhat disgusted look, "_Anyway_, I came up with an idea with how I can get close to her."

"Yeah, and it's absolutely downright his worst idea yet." Kiba stated.

"Go on…" Kakashi said eyeing his son.

"I can attend Madame Francis's School for Girls." Naruto said simply.

Kakashi remained silent now looking down at the dining room table as if examining it, but technically he was looking passed it while he zoned into thought. Naruto squirmed from nervousness noting he hadn't seen his father this serious or heard his father this quiet in his known existence. It was somewhat nerve-racking. The blonde had a feeling Kakashi was going to side with his friend with the thought of it being pure madness.

Then again, Kakashi himself was pure madness and sexual deviance.

"I think it's a positively brilliant idea." Kakashi spoke up suddenly.

"What!?" Kiba gave Kakashi a worse look than he had given Naruto.

"Seriously!?" Naruto instantly brightened.

"_But_…" The man stressed.

Naruto instantly dropped his head like he had lost some wonderful game where he thought he had just won the grand prize and it had been ripped from his hands. Kiba on the other hand was leaning back in his seat and was now grinning broadly at the thought of this crazy scheme having been stopped just when it had started.

"We're going to need all three of us to pull this off, so we obviously can't pull this off without Kiba-kun's approval or help."

"_Ooooh _no. Hell no."

Naruto looked pleading towards Kiba, his eyes slightly watery making them look even more pure and like the ocean. Kiba stood from his seat shaking his head still refusing while Naruto clasped his hands in a pleading manner in hopes it would make a difference, but in that point in time he really should have known better.

"Fine," Naruto began flatly, "if you help me transfer and with this _entire_ thing…I'll help you get Hyuuga Hinata to date you."

Kiba looked towards Naruto after he gave the kitchen door a longing look, thinking slightly with a rather guilty feeling. It was true that Naruto would be going to the same school and his whole objective was to get into that small clique of friends to get to Sakura.

The teen bit his lip before reaching his hand across the table toward his best friend and finally let out a defeated sigh.

"Fine. Deal. As long as you don't dress me up in that school girl shit too you crazy freak…"

Kakashi clapped his hands together with a smile as the two shook hands, "Then it's settled. Naruto will be transferring first thing next week. How proud I am to have a son _and_ a daughter all in one!"

As the older man stood from the table his son followed suit screaming his head off about he was just going to be a boy in girls' clothes, and to get it right.

* * *

Author's Notes: Yeah, it's a tad sketchy, but I like it. Read, review and enjoy!


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**: High Socks and A Short Skirt

**Author's Notes**: Everyone seemed to like it SO FAR, thanks for all the reviews.

**Warnings**: Cross-dressing, crudeness, foul language…

**Disclaimer:** How I wish… but I don't own it.

**Dedication**: To Katlyn, whom without, I wouldn't have continued this fiction. Not to mention, she's the best friend I could have ever asked for and I would be dead without her.

**Rating**: T – For: Thanks for cross dressin' hotties.

**Chapter Two**: High Socks and A Short Skirt

* * *

"All right, now. Why don't you turn around slowly so I can make sure you have it on properly?" Kakashi asked calmly, but Naruto could hear the teasing in his voice.

Naruto let out a long sigh closely followed by a low string of curses, just low enough for his father not to hear, but Kiba heard.  
Naruto's friend stood inside the entryway leading from one room to the other leaning against the wall with his arms crossed over his chest and a mixed look of disgust and confusion fluttering across his face.

Naruto spun quickly, the skirt flying out and up causing him to shoot his hands down to grab it to hold it in place low against his thighs.

"No, Naruto…slowly," Kakashi teased more openly causing Naruto to huff.

"Dad!" Naruto attempted to flail but soon realized that the white button-up shirt – insignia lightly sew on to the right breast - was more constricting than he noticed.

Why did he have to try on a uniform for a school he wasn't even sure he was going to attend, for a plan he wasn't sure he was going to follow through with; it was beginning to feel like a bad idea.

"Dude…did you shave your legs?" Kiba finally questioned, the obvious confusion blooming more openly across his face.

Naruto's head snapped towards his friend, his wild blonde hair tickling his forehead in his sudden erratic movement. Kakashi simply snickered as he rose from his seat already knowing the answer making Naruto go red with embarrassment.

"No…well – I didn't shave them." Naruto's cheeks flushed a new, deeper shade of red as he tried to tug on the short black skirt, his eyes dropping on the tall black knee high socks.  
Kiba tried not to grimace but it was too little too late as he cocked his head back at his best friends' answer, "Then what in the hell did you do? Where in the hell is the hair on your legs?"

Kakashi was chuckling merrily against the wall between the two teens already knowing the answer seeing as he supplied the product of destruction. Naruto might be _trying_ everything out, but Kakashi was going to see fit that it was humiliating and downright hilarious.

"It's some hair removal stuff…" Naruto began meekly, "It's called 'Sheet' or something?"

"It's called 'Veet' Naruto," Kakashi instantly corrected him with a snicker.

"Yeah, well, anyway. It gets rid of the hair with me hacking my legs to a pulp. I mean, it might smell like a bad perm, but it gets the job done." Naruto dropped his shoulders suddenly thinking this was the worst idea he had ever come up with.

"Naruto," Kiba began with a deep breath, "Where on earth did you use that crap?"

Naruto's eyes turned to slits with his glare, his arms shooting down rigidly by his side while Kakashi stifled the laughter that was itching the back of his throat.

"My legs and under my arms, that's all you sick freak!" Naruto bowed his face in hopes it would hide the deep scarlet blush that was spreading widely across his face.  
Kiba shrugged lightly eyeing Naruto suspiciously, "I just wanted to make sure you didn't get carried away or anything."

Kakashi appeared in the doorway with a box in his hand, the two teens not noticing that he had disappeared, "I think it's time to put the icing on the cake."

Naruto turned around quickly, his skirt fluttering up in the air causing his tan hands to snap back down and yank it back down over his boxers.  
Kiba stayed where he was, leaning tensely in the doorway as he eyed the box more wearily as the seconds ticked by; expecting the unexpected with Kakashi was the safest bet.  
Kakashi immediately flipped the top off the box letting it clatter to the floor, a long blonde wig being withdrawn carefully with a devilish smile.

"What is wrong with my hair!?" Naruto reached up and tugged at his short unruly blonde locks in desperation.

"Way to take the dyke route…" Kiba muttered.

Naruto turned to fix his glare on his friend only to have Kakashi smack the wig on his head, causing the shorter blonde hair, to quickly go to a long blonde mane. The wig stretched down to the small of his back, the hair light and flowing, and making Kakashi simply double over in delighted giggles.

Kiba couldn't even stifle the sputtered laugh that made its way out of his lips as he stared at the somewhat confused blonde, with his wig askew, and his ocean eyes looking around as if he were lost.

Naruto growled under his breath, ripping the wig from his head and tossing it to the ground, "Okay, that's it, I've had enough!" He instantly declared.

Kakashi still refused to stop giggling with glee while Kiba raised his left eyebrow as the only sort of questioning he was going to do.

"I'm backing out. Easy as that," Naruto stated flatly.

"Oh, I don't think so…"

Naruto and Kiba finally gave Kakashi their attention, the man having straightened his posture and attitude – no longer laughing – giving Naruto a serious look.

"Why the hell not?" The blonde glared, looking less menacing than he realized, as he was still in the school uniform.

"Well, I took you seriously; I already transferred you – that outfit isn't just for trying on."  
Naruto couldn't help but scream rather inappropriate words at his father while his best friend couldn't help but find the entire situation all too humorous.

* * *

"Why in the hell am I walking you to school?" Kiba muttered darkly, not finding the situation humorous any longer.

Naruto wobbled beside him unsteadily in the dress shoes his father picked out, an inch or so of heel leaving him to look unsure in every step. The blonde wig was on his head straight today, Kakashi took it upon himself to put it in pigtails, and Naruto took it upon himself to hurl something inanimate at him.

The unsure and unsteady blonde looked more girly than ever in the school uniform that had to be worn. Usually the baggy clothes that he leaned towards wearing covered up his somewhat thin frame, and left much up to the imagination.

In the short skirt and skin tight shirt – stuff bra included – Naruto was looking all too feminine.

"I just need someone to make sure I don't fall!" Naruto gave an unsteady wobble, latching on to Kiba's arm as he swayed before his friend hastily shook him off.

"Fall all you want!" Kiba shouted, stopping in his tracks; completely embarrassed by the whole ordeal.

"What if a guy hits on me?" Naruto muttered the question through gritted teeth trying to stress his obvious worry.

Kiba stopped mid thought, obviously not having thought of that. Kakashi had done an all-too-good of a job with the make-up that lightly covered Naruto's face, erasing what little rugged tone he had. Giving Naruto breasts, and fake as they may be, was the worst idea Kakashi had yet. With his already girlish legs, face, and torso; it worried Kiba to look at his best friend – it was dangerous. In order to be in Sakura's small and cozy little clique, you had to be above and beyond beautiful, and how Kakashi pulled it off, Kiba still couldn't believe it; if he didn't know Naruto was a guy…Kiba shook his head roughly.

But Naruto's question was completely justified.

Kiba grumbled under his breath, continuing their path on their way to the blonde's first day of school, Naruto stumbling lightly against him occasionally.  
The two rounded a corner silently, Kiba sulking and Naruto stumbling with a curse before their eyes fell upon it.

"Have you ever…" Kiba began breathlessly.

"Seen anything so fucking glorious?" Naruto finished crudely, his grin wide.

The school was standing proudly across the street; the brass gate that usually secluded the school stood open, and girls in small uniforms were swarming, talking, and joking.

"Are you sure you're going to be able to focus on _only_ Sakura?" Kiba barely managed to get his question out as stared forward, his jaw partially slack from blissful shock.

The blonde dumbly nodded, his eyes wondering around the crowd for a spot of pink hair, but only managed to find what he dreaded.

"Oh my, no…" Naruto whispered harshly.

Kiba barely shook his head out of his dazed stupor to question his friend who sounded suddenly mortified, "What?"

"Guys! There are _guys_ here!" Blonde flashed out of Kiba's peripheral only to notice Naruto was cowering behind his back.

"They're just some guys from Academia. They're most likely here with their girlfriends, or trying to pick one up," Kiba commented lightly, studying the group casually.

"That's _exactly_ what I'm trying to avoid!" Naruto's voice squeaked.

"Well my friend, let's face it, you might have to have some guys try and pick you up to swing with this crowd… it comes with the skirt."

Naruto kicked at the back of Kiba's leg roughly, stumbling at the loss f balance, and falling into Kiba's back.

The taller male ignored the light throbbing pain as he shook off his friend once more, his eyes still lingering on the crowd of teen boys, "You still haven't told me how you are going to win over your fair maiden looking like that."

Naruto grimaced, knowing how Kiba was going to react, "I haven't figured out that small little detail quite yet."

The blonde watched with careful eyes as he saw Kiba's head drop, stepped to the side, and point with his index finger in the direction of the tall and lurking school – dismissing him in disappointment and frustration.

Naruto opened his lightly painted lips to speak, but Kiba pointed his finger in the air towards the school once more, sending the blonde to attempt to storm across the street rather unsuccessfully as he stumbled the entire way.

Sasuke sighed in impatience, having finished his errand to the all girl's school a few blocks away, risking his limps that usually got tugged on to do so – upholding his odd duties as class president.

Shikamaru had lingered though. While waiting outside for his stoic friend, he was sucked into conversation with a rather uptight and overbearing blonde young woman by the name of Temari. What the young raven could gather was she had gone from yelling at him for loitering outside the school, and smoking, to chatting idly with him about nothing important. Sasuke was so shocked by the fact that his best friend was upholding a normal conversation of impressive length; he allowed it to continue for quite some time.

The only problem was now his classmates from school were starting to randomly wander into the school yard, lingering on their own in hopes to grab a woman of their own, and the even bigger problem was they weren't bothering to pay any attention to them. Most of the girls were flocking to him, Sasuke, who was trying to patiently wait for his usually quiet and bored friend, who was now showing interest in a rather scary woman.

"Uchiha-san…"

Sasuke turned to glare at a freshman that managed to inch her way to his side, her eyes wide with hope and admiration, and his were cold with displeasure.

"Hm?" Barely a sound as he turned to look back on his friend who was still chatting on with the blonde busty woman. He wasn't going to stop soon.

"I was wondering…"

"No." Sasuke said quickly, sighing as he began pinching the bridge of his nose in annoyance.

The girl gave him a rather hurt look, her large brown eyes sparkling with tears or pain, Sasuke didn't care; he was ready to punch Shikamaru in the back of the head to get him to move on already.

Sasuke's coal eyes were roaming, looking for anymore possible dangers in pestering school girls and overly clingy behaviors when he caught sight of something he couldn't look away from.

Someone _very_ attractive but _very_ uncoordinated.

A blonde was crossing the street, tumbling over her own feet as she stared down confusedly at her own shoes with her long pigtails brushing against her lightly painted cheeks. Her legs seem to tremble as she used every bit of effort to keep her balance, every so often tugging on her short skirt to keep it down, and Sasuke watched as her tan hands tugged at her clinging shirt.

It was the first time Sasuke had actually been drawn to one of Madame Francis's beasts of burden, something was instantly different, but Sasuke couldn't put his finger on it.  
Naruto on the other hand, was cursing to the point he thought his tongue was going to fall out of his mouth. It was the _worst_ idea in history. Every time he took a single step his skirt rode up, his shirt rode up, and the horrible sadistic contraption known as a bra rubbed him in a horrible blistering way.

The shoes were the worst thing in the world. If Naruto had any balance to begin with, it was given to the clerk when Kakashi bought the shoes. Now, here Naruto was, trying to attempt to look cool enough to be apart of Sakura's exclusive click.

What the fuck was he thinking?

"Are you lost?"

Naruto's head snapped up at the small voice upon reaching the safety of the sidewalk after an impatient driver nearly ran him off the road.  
He immediately recognized the girl, though he didn't voice it, Hinata stood in front him with polite curiosity. The blonde silently hoped beyond any probable possibility that Kiba was standing on the opposite sidewalk watching, noting that Naruto was about to start upholding his side of the contract.

Hinata stood politely still, patiently waiting for Naruto's answer, her pale gray eyes kind and soft making the blonde feel strangely welcomed.  
Though, something flickered inside of him with an odd sense of joyous hope; when there was one, the other two strangely came. If he stuck to Hinata, he would find Sakura.

It was time to play dumb.

"Uh…I'm not sure…" Naruto hiked up his voice a few octaves and softened it with a wince hoping the hysteric squeaking had died.

"You're new? I've never seen you…"

Naruto gave an unsteady wobble before nodding, his pigtails flapping suddenly, "Yes. I just moved here."

It was the quickest lie he could come up with, not having thought of that either; he hadn't thought this through at all but simply dived in head first – into a drained pool, what a headache.

She nodded lightly, "I'm Hinata," She introduced politely, "Do you know what your first class is?"

"I'm Naruto…" The blonde waved off the curious look Hinata had given him at the mention of his boyish name. He would build another lie of weird parents with _bad_ tastes. I mean, look  
at what celebrities are naming their kids, his was justified.

Naruto yanked his pink shoulder bag off with a rather angry tug, Kakashi having gone overboard with the torture, and dug out the small slip of a schedule.

"I have English with Anko," Naruto replied with a hint of confusion.

"Oh, then you're with me!" A light chirp called from in front of him suddenly.

Naruto's eyes snapped up from the small slip, his eyes meeting emeralds – Sakura was standing in front of him, he hadn't even noticed her arrival.  
The blonde's heart raced in his chest making wild beats against his ribs making sure to cause his blood pressure to rise to an unhealthy level, and cause his head to spin slightly; what an effect.

"I'm Sakura; I'm the Junior year class president," She stated with confidence while Naruto mentally tried to wrestle with his own tongue.

"It's nice to meet you…" He simply mumbled.

"Well, I say you stick with us all day, better as to not get lost. Plus we're more welcoming than most," Sakura said with a plain smile gathering another girl to her personal queue. She turned to give Hinata a small hug, which Naruto dreaded, was something customary.

He would lose it.

Naruto's eyes quickly scanned the school yard of girls who were mostly glowering at him, and an impending sense of doom engulfed him.

"Why are they so angry?" Naruto whispered the question more to himself than to the others, but Sakura had heard.

"They don't like newcomers. Think of this school as a modeling agency and all those boys over there are the designers you're trying to model for. The more girls, the harder it is." Sakura was glaring back at some of the girls, and Naruto simply nodded dumbly at the girlish explanation.

"Where too?" Naruto questioned praying he didn't sound too desperate, but the haste to escape the soon-to-be angry mob made him hasty. Not too mention the thought of getting to be around Sakura being this easy seemed to be all too good.

"Well!" Ino suddenly appeared from behind Sakura obviously ogling the boys, " I have forth with Sakura, and Hinata has seventh with me. You obviously have firth with Sakura, but other than that, we usually run across the street for lunch seeing as the school food tastes horrible. So we meet out here at eleven. We catch up in between classes occasionally, but usually we don't really get together till after school, when we head on over to Academia."

Naruto's stomach twisted in knots suddenly after hearing the blonde speak with flirtatious glee and desperately wanted to sink into the ground.

"That's quite a schedule…" Naruto tried to comment, but the other girls giggled, even Hinata offered a forced awkward laugh.

The blonde's mind raced back to public school, the random people and the horribly unorganized cliques. The place where he was safe from guys and short skirts – suddenly he didn't like them quite as much – and where he could admire his crush from a safe distance.

"So, why do you go there?" Naruto strained out, trying to keep the conversation going and the girls interested in the potential friendship.

"Well…" Ino cut Sakura off as the pink-haired maiden went to speak, "being at an all-girls school isn't exactly the greatest thing in the world. We _are_ at that age when boys are fun and interesting, but it's not that great when none are around. Besides…" Ino began to whisper and the two familiar girls leaned in leaving Naruto to lean in last, "It looks like you already have an admirer."

Naruto finally took in that Ino was inclining her head towards himself, Sakura's eyes wide with wonder, and Hinata was rather indifferent. Naruto popped his head up from the small huddle, his eyes scanning the field to comb through scowling and glares, landing on the group of teens boys in their school uniforms; all staring around with bright gleaming eyes.

Naruto gulped.

Sasuke's coal eyes continued to stare at the now horrified looking blonde teen with wonder. He knew, absolutely _knew_ that there was something different about her. It separated her from all the other girls he had seen or come across. It was something that was bothering him to figure out, and he would be damned if he didn't.

Curiosity had gotten the best of him, but his charm and good looks would be getting the best of the blue-eyed blonde whom he had just locked eyes with.

* * *

Author's Notes: This type of fiction – as to how its story line and character play – is not my style. If something seems off and you are annoyed, bare with me. I have no clue what I'm doing, but, just having fun like fanfiction is meant for.  
**Updates: **Will or will not be this frequent. I'm trying to have chapters saved up so as to not get further behind and scramble to write (Like A Little Less Than Forgotten).


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Notes:** Mokay, chapter three. Hmm. I want to address the one fact rather quickly, that I will be tapering off from Sakura eventually. I don't like her. At all. So writing about her drives me nuts. I don't know how long it's going to take me to get away from her, but I can't get away from her completely, just mostly. Just a heads up for those of you who like Sakura.

**Also: **I know I labeled this as 'general', but it was simply because I don't know what to label it as. If anyone has suggestions at any time… tell me.

**Disclaimer**: I don't own much of anything. So why would I own Naruto? ::shrug::

**Rating:** K+ - T: Foul Language and suggestiveness? Maybe? God. I hate rating.

**Chapter 3** – Follow The Leader

* * *

Sasuke still hadn't figured out if it was out of pure curiosity, downright disgust, or teenage hormonal lust; but he was drawn to the odd blonde whom he had locked eyes with.  
And what a heart stopping color they were.

"You're more abnormally quiet than usual," Shikamaru commented suddenly from the passenger side of the car.

Sasuke's eyes flicked quickly from off of the road, the two of them finally having set off towards school, and glared.

"Is it because we were at the school so long? I didn't mean to keep you…" Shikamaru commented lightly, knowing his tone of voice would cause Sasuke to be even angrier.

"They were starting to swarm," The raven commented with a growl.

"I said I didn't mean too. You could have left."

"Sure. Then having your lazy ass call me not ten minutes later to turn around and pick you up. Next time I have to take something to Tsunade, I'm leaving you locked in the car."

Sasuke shot angrily while Shikamaru was admiring the digits scribbled on his hand hastily; Sasuke had been dragging him away by his collar.

"Despite my wonderful conversation," Shikamaru continued on leisurely as if talking about the weather, "I noticed you staring."

Sasuke yanked the car over to the side of the road causing the car behind him to swerve dangerously, "Get out."

"I was just commenting."

"Comment again and I will kill you."

"It was the klutzy blonde who couldn't stand on her own two feet. Who knew you liked idiots." Shikamaru added quickly sending Sasuke into a raging state.

* * *

Naruto stumbled beside Sakura towards his first class. This time, he wasn't quite sure if it was due to his shoes or his crush walking beside him talking to him wildly.  
All Naruto could do though, while Sakura chatted up a storm, was nod dumbly and hum in false shock and interest.

"Still shy and worried?" Sakura suddenly questioned with general earnest in her voice, finally catching on to the one-sidedness in the conversation.

Naruto gave the teen a weak smile with a small little nod, "I guess. It's hard moving."

Sakura gave him a sympathetic look not catching the double sided meaning to his sentence, "I know what you mean. I was worried when I moved here too. The hardest part was leaving everyone behind."

Naruto's mind began to panic, not really thinking he was going to get dragged into this type of situation and conversation so quickly and dug for the continuance.

"Yeah, leaving was difficult." Naruto rolled his eyes at his own lame response.

Sakura passed it off as shyness, "Did you leave a lot of friends?"

Naruto thought of Kiba and what it would be like leaving him behind, how hard it would be and getting over it. "Nope, not really."

"What about a best friend?" She asked slightly bewildered by the dismissive comment.

Again Naruto thought of Kiba and leaving him. "No, not really. We fought a lot anyway."

"Oh," Sakura continued to lead the two of them through the mazes of halls, "What about a boy? Or boy_s_."

The blonde almost choked on nothing at the innocent question that would be passed around a group of girls, the topic of topics, and the one he really should have prepared himself for – boys.

He hoped he hadn't made some type of grimace, but his face betrayed him when Sakura noticed, "Ah, still hard to talk about?"

"I'm learning to get over it." Naruto brain suddenly spiked with an instant idea, hoping Kakashi or Kiba wouldn't get wind of this conversation somehow.

"My neighbor is pretty cute, and he's helping me cope." Naruto blinked at how that came out with ease. He felt like his long time crush was converting him into some unspoken cult.

Sakura thought, being oblivious to what Naruto really was, took it in stride with a few girlish giggles, "Spill."

Naruto racked his brain through girlish lingo that Kakashi had quizzed him on and instantly perked up once he had homed in on the definition.

"He's this _really_ sweet and _really_ cute blonde boy; great laugh and wonderful personality." Naruto gave himself a mental pat on the back.

"Really? What's his name?"

Naruto gave a horribly unsteady wobble at the question, Sakura mistaking it for new shoes which she had already expressed her feelings about.

"Kiba…" Naruto went on quickly, "His name is Kiba."

"I like the sound of his name, sounds strong. Are you two an item?" Sakura questioned lightly, continuing the conversation lightly.

Naruto's gag reflex checked him as he felt the bile rise and fall in his throat, "No. He isn't quite my type, and I'm not quite his. You should come over sometime, and I'll introduce you…if you're single."

The blonde was hoping his voice didn't sound hopeful, but he knew if it did, he could pass it off easily as just wanting a new friend.

"I have one question?"

Naruto's heart stopped in his chest, hoping when becoming casual his voice hadn't dropped, "Yes?"

"Is he from Academia?"

Naruto roughly shook his head, "No, he goes to the public school just outside the privet district."

"Then I might just have to take you up on that offer."

Naruto had to hide the grin that had, instantly, proudly bloomed on his face at his accomplishment; now Kiba couldn't banish him from his sight.

"So…" Naruto tried to continue as casually as possible, but the slight sound of hysteria was back, and he tried and cleared it quickly.

"You don't have any guys you're interested in?" Naruto made his voice awkward, hoping it would help her sympathize in his trying to hold a conversation. It was bad enough he was  
following her around like a lost puppy or a baby chick.

She giggled lightly, "Nope. A guy from Academia is interested in me. I think he's attractive, but I wouldn't date him."

Naruto's mind instantly purged the partial conversation he heard as the small group walked by casually – he had been in a bush, and the blonde thought Sakura was talking about something completely different. Naruto thought she was talking about having sex with someone, not dating them; he was suddenly grateful.

The two rounded the corner into their classroom, the teacher wasn't present yet, and Naruto absently followed her without thinking while trying to keep the conversation flowing.

"So, why don't you date Academia guys?" The blonde had to admit, he was curious.

Sakura shrugged lightly, "They're just annoying. Like leeches."

Naruto repressed a hiss, a sound made when you know you made an accident, and dropped his head to hide his blush. He was one of those 'leeches', just not in a school uniform. Oh boy.

"What type of guys are you into?" Sakura asked innocently, but Naruto found it to be down right evil.

"Well…"

"Because Sasuke-kun gave you the eye," Sakura said with a voice of admiration.

"The who-what now?" Naruto's voice slipped an octave, but he caught it before it got into man territory.

Sakura giggled lightly, "Sasuke-kun, the one that was staring at you… he gave you _the eye_. You know the 'I want you' look."

Naruto gulped. It was his worst nightmare wrapped around a dream.

* * *

Ino and Hinata waited outside; Hinata patiently and Ino bouncing from one foot to the other. The day was finally over – mostly. The school part. Naruto already knew that Kiba wasn't going to pick him up on account he had detention; the blonde already threatened Kakashi of staying away within a hundred yards from the school.

So he was stuck, even if it was with Sakura, going to Academia.

"So, whose car are we taking?" Ino chimed in, but Naruto simply misunderstood; he saw them walk here almost everyday.

Almost.

Sakura shrugged, "I could care less. My car can fit all of us, your Corvette obviously can't."

Ino shrugged, "We're all thin enough to squeeze in."

"You drive like a maniac," Sakura reminded her sternly.

Hinata paled a little at what seemed to be a memory, while Ino simply shoved her lollipop in her mouth with a shrug, spun on her heal, and headed down the street toward the  
secluded parking lot.

"Unless you want to take your car, Naruto?" Sakura asked politely.

"No, no, yours is fine."

Naruto didn't quite know how to explain that he didn't have a car, let alone his license. Yeah, that would go over real well with the popular kids, right along side with having male genitalia.

"So, what kind of car do you drive?" Naruto asked, his brain still a sponge for Sakura's answers.

"A 2008 SLR McLaren Roadster, but I borrowed my dad's Suburban today." She said lightly, apparently everyone had cars like that.

Naruto on the other hand, gawked, which wasn't exactly ladylike. His manners, which had been taught to him overnight, had flown out the window at the mention of the impossible car; how in the world did people afford such things?

"What kind of car do you have?" Ino asked innocently as she waved to a group of older college students that were passing through the neighborhood.

Naruto's mind clawed at a car, he really hadn't expected _this_ type of thing at all to come up, but at the mention of lying about extravagant things that he couldn't afford – he wanted to vomit.

"Naruto!"

The group of girls whipped around, looking in the direction of the voice they heard, and Naruto instantly paled. It was Kiba, not only looking livid at the fact he was picking the blonde up, but downright embarrassed.

Apparently he got out of detention.

"Who's that?" Sakura and Ino murmured in interest at the same time.

"It's not what you think; he's my…brother, Kakashi." Naruto quickly fumbled out.

Tangle after tangle.

"He looks nothing like you." Hinata finally spoke.

"I'll be right back; I'll tell him I'm getting a ride from you three so he can head on home!" Naruto waved as he made his way back to his seething friend.

"Oh, look at that, you can walk straight now. Let's go!" Kiba spat as Naruto finally approached with his pigtails trailing in the breeze and his skirt ruffling.

"You're my brother…" Naruto mumbled as he looked around panicked.

"What!?"

"They're going to walk this way, just go with this. Please. You're my brother, Kakashi. I figured a way to get Sakura over, and how to talk to her, but I'm going to have to borrow your name, Kiba." Naruto rushed out quickly.

"You've lost your fucking mind."

"Please?" Naruto batted his false eyelashes over his bright blue eyes, causing Kiba to bottle up a yell. The blonde managed to grasp his feminine side quicker than he thought.

But the three girls, just as Naruto predicted, had approached.

Naruto saw Kiba stiffen at the sight of Hinata, and instantly, he knew he would be okay.

"Hi! We're Naruto-chan's new friends. I'm Ino, this is Sakura and Hinata." Ino politely shook Kiba's hand as did the other two.

Naruto latched onto Kiba's arm with a girlish giggle that caused him to glare and shudder, "He's a great brother, don't let the silence bother you."

Sakura and Ino smiled both on opposite sides of Hinata – obviously silence didn't bother them.

"Anyway, I'm going to hang out with them for a little while, do you mind? Just tell dad I'll be home a little late."

Kiba clenched his jaw, and desperately tried to shake his friend off without seeming horribly rude.

"Yeah, okay, I'll do that. Don't get into any trouble. I don't want to be the one to _bust you out._"

"I won't!" Naruto glared, and decided at the implied comment of exposing him, to lean up on his tip-toes and peck Kiba on his check.

It was what most families do, so why not…get a little revenge?

Naruto let go at that time, feeling Kiba shake from rage, and walked off with the group of girls to his nightmare, while his best friend stayed behind to plot his death.

* * *

The four got out of the giant vehicle; Naruto tugging on his short skirt and clinging shirt that persistently rode up. The blonde gave his hips a little wiggle at the binding sensation of his briefs, only used to boxers, and hoped it would give himself some relief; he was just simply more aware of how uncomfortable they were. The four of them abandoned their bags in Sakura's car, not wanting extra weight as they approached the school.

Naruto had to repress his shudders and glares as they walked up the sidewalk towards the school, teen boys already headed towards their cars, and already breaking their necks to look.

Naruto wanted to die.

Ino graciously waved at every single boy who looked, Sakura simply talked to Hinata, and Naruto tucked his head silently praying that this was some dream he had cooked up.

"Sakura, I'm going to talk to Chouji." Ino said lightly, prancing off to see her friend.

Sakura hung her head as she crossed her hands over her chest, "Hinata, how long will it take you to see Neji?"

"Not long, he should have dismissed his class not too long ago."

"You're boyfriend is a teacher?" Naruto asked quickly, not only getting worried about the deal he made with Kiba, but the age difference had a huge gap which he wasn't quite used to.

Hinata let out a false giggle that seemed to be habitual, "No, he's my cousin. He used to attend here, now he's a teacher. I just needed to speak with him, I won't be long."

Sakura and Naruto watched Hinata walk through the crowd of recently dismissed boys, leaving them to be alone, causing Naruto to shake from pure joy.

"Look, your admirer has emerged." Sakura commented dryly, wanting to leave.

And the joy turned to regret.

"What the hell do I do?" Naruto whispered, wanting the question to stay mental, but it slipped through his lips.

"Go talk to him!" Sakura encouraged with a grin.

"Are you fucking serious!?" Naruto whipped around, eyes big with worry.

The blonde's plan was already going awry the first day; didn't it usually take a week or two in the stories? What type sick fairy tale was this?

"Calm down, Naru-chan!" Sakura said somewhat soothingly, but a little taken aback.

"I don't want to talk to him!" Naruto squeaked higher than he thought he could manage.

"Oh, yes you do," The pink haired girl tried to re-assure him, "Trust me. He's one of the few from Academia that are bearable."

Naruto tried to keep his feet planted as Sakura pushed him, not nudging, but pushing his back roughly as he stumbled forward.  
Sasuke's coal eyes roamed the school yard, looking around for his ever-annoying friend, and his companion for the short ride home.

Sasuke's eyes raked over the lingering girls mixed within the groups of boys, looking anywhere for a tall spiky ponytail, only to land on a stumbling blonde and a persistent friend.  
The raven's feet were moving before he was really thinking about it, but having the blonde's face stuck in his mind all day had that affect on him. Sasuke had been trying to figure out what was so different about him all day; which caused him to drift in three of his classes and get caught for it.

"Just, go Naruto! Come on! It's not such a big deal, trust me!" Sakura continued to push with all her might while Naruto dug the heels of his shoes into the dirt.

"It _is_ that big of a deal! You need to listen to me!" Naruto protested with a grunt.

"Hello girls." Sasuke interrupted with a cool voice and a swift grin.

Sakura immediately straightened up; removing her hands from Naruto's back as if she had been caught doing something she wasn't supposed to be doing. Naruto on the other hand, having been pressing back with a good amount of force only to have it disappear in an instant, fell back with a thud.

"Oh! Naruto-chan! I'm so sorry!" Sakura said with an apologetic voice, crouching to help her friend.

Naruto winced both at the suffix and the sharp pain in his backside, not to mention the embarrassment; who in the hell knew being a female would be so challenging?

"Are you all right?"

It was a voice as smooth as silk with the breath smelling sweet with mint, Naruto's blue eyes not being able to find a face in the direct line of the sun.

"Let's get you off the ground."

Naruto felt arms snake around his shoulders and waist, the muscles large but not bulky and bulging – comforting, and lifted him with ease till he was on his feet.  
The blonde began dusting off his uniform, his tan hands wiping away the copper from the black skirt and white shirt as much as possible, but the damage was done, and Kakashi would be going to the dry cleaners sooner than expected.

Kakashi his father, not Kakashi his brother, which was Kiba, not the Kiba who was him dressed in a girls uniform with a different name. Naruto shook his head, causing his long blonde pig-tails to sway at the confusion he had caused himself.

"Are you all right?" The husky, silky smooth voice asked again, but this time it caused Naruto to look up from his task of dusting himself off.

There stood Sasuke, toe to toe with him, and by the looks of things, he wasn't going anywhere soon.

* * *

Author's Notes: Hmm… I've been irritable, but I've been writing. Calm yourself with the pestering of updating.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four** – Persistence Meets Resistance

**Author's Notes**: Wow, So, I've been busting my non-existent balls with this fiction, but I see the parts where it lacks. I'm getting there, again, this isn't my forte… you know, the overly persistent Sasuke and the not-very-willing Naruto. Geez. I dug my own grave with this one. If you need me, I'll still be digging, further and further down.

**ALSO**: Sorry for the little delay (since I'm spoiling you with the weekly updates), but I wanted to make sure I had some spare chapters. In the end, I just pissed me self off… YAY! (And if I owe you an email or a PM… forgive me…delays and holidays slay me).

**Dedication**: To Resuna, because her musing me (or really, us going back and forth) with Sasuke stalking Naruto gave me the inspiration I needed. As _awkward_ as that is, but damn _funny._

**Warning**: Meh, me being a bitch… because that's the best warning I can give you.

**Disclaimer**: I own not a thing, how shocking.

**Rating**: That would be T for thinking I can move this fiction along. Yay! Nevi-chan is moving her annoying ass along. Everyone applaud. NO! Not throw things!

**Chapter Four** – Persistence Meets Resistance

"I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If someone should come up to me and challenge me to a fight, I would take them kindly and forgivingly by hand, lead them to a quiet place and kill them." -Mark Twain

* * *

Naruto immediately took a step back as soon as he realized how close the boy was, clenching his jaw and grinding his teeth, and stifled a growl of annoyance.

"I don't believe I've seen you around here before," Sasuke started in a cool and slick voice, causing Naruto to roll his eyes and mentally gag, "I'm Sasuke."

Naruto's cerulean eyes glared daggers at Sasuke's pale hand that was sticking out between them in a polite gesture, and the blonde instantly crossed his arms in front of his chest, "I'm your worst nightmare."

Sakura's face was shocked at the acidic tone and heated glare her new friend was sharing with the raven in front of them. No one ever acted like that with Sasuke – ever.

The raven dropped his pale hand to his side limply, causing Naruto to grin in triumph, the boy had gotten the hint and supposedly, Naruto had gotten the hang of shooting boys down.

Be rude.

Naruto mentally winced at the quick reel of memories that played in his mind of all the girls being rude to him from turndown after turndown.

Sakura was elbowing him in his ribs, giving him a look of disbelief, and Naruto figured it was because he turned down this guy in front of him. Naruto flashed her a brilliant smile, she didn't like Academia guys, so she would be fine.

She was actually giving him a big eyed persisting look, barely inclining her head to the raven, and Naruto knew Sakura wanted the blonde to play nice.

"It's okay, I understand." Sasuke was calm and cool, his collective self. His face was scanning Naruto's once more, causing the teen in front of him to glare.

"Is there anything _else_!" Naruto practically hissed the last word, his hands were balling up into fists and his jaw was locked as his teeth grinded together.

Sasuke took a quick step forward, lightly brushing one of Naruto's pigtails back to let it fall down his back, his finger tips ghosting the side of the blonde's slender neck, his lips suddenly tickling Naruto's ear causing him to freeze on the spot.

Sasuke's voice was coming in whispers, his breath shooting out into Naruto's ear to cause the blonde to repress several shivers that traveled down his spine.  
Being rude wasn't as great of a plan as he thought.

"_Hanes_ _male, _briefs? How curious…for a fe_male_."

Naruto felt Sasuke's hand tug the bottom of his shirt down over the top of his skirt at the time his own breath caught in his throat. Whether it was from the contact from the teen boy in front of him, or the suggesting whisper, Naruto was quite sure the boy was onto him.

And fast.

* * *

"Where am I taking you Naruto-chan?" Ino questioned from the front seat lightly while Sakura went on.

"And _then_ Sasuke-kun, even though Naruto-chan completely blew him off, actually whispered something in her ear!" Sakura squealed, leaving Naruto to want to vomit for the umpteenth time.

"Just take me back to our school; it's not a long walk…" The blonde mumbled as he stared out the window hoping it would shield his new green tint.

"We can drop you at your house…" Hinata said politely from next to Naruto, the two of them sitting comfortably in the back.

"What!" Ino's eyes grew twice their size from shock, "You blew him off! Sasuke-kun!"

Sakura was nodding fervently, "And he _still_ seems interested."

Ino continued to drive Sakura's father's car, "Wow, you lucky dog. I may flirt for fun, but that's a catch I wouldn't take lightly, Naruto-chan."

Naruto felt the bile rise in the back of his throat and grimaced, still staring out the window at the things that flew by, and realized that they were going a little too fast for his taste. At this point, he welcomed death.

"So, Naruto-chan, where do you live? We'll drop you." Sakura had turned around to face Naruto who was glaring out the window.

"Just outside of the privet district," Naruto grumbled, still irritated about the boy known as Sasuke.

Sakura, Ino, and Hinata shared a quick glance that showed an obvious misinterpretation of the grumbling.

"Oh, don't be embarrassed Naruto-chan! We don't care!" Ino chirped as she swerved dangerously around a slower moving car, and into oncoming traffic, before placing them into the  
correct traffic patter; safely.

Sakura looked over at her with a pale face, "Now why did I let you drive?"

Ino shrugged casually, "You were too stunned to do so."

Sakura shook her pink head causing Naruto's heart to flutter, "Besides Naruto-chan, if we take you home, we can meet your father!"

Naruto immediately dropped his head against the window, wondering if he could claim brain damage as the girls asked if he was alright, but simply pointed in the right direction, and prayed for a miracle.

* * *

"What did you do to that poor girl?" Shikamaru inhaled deeply from his cigarette as he gave his friend a wary look of disappointment.

Sasuke glared lightly at Shikamaru, who was smoking outside of his friends' car, Sasuke waiting for him to finish so they could leave, "I didn't do anything."

"She had a look in between murder and vomiting. You did something. Then again, you just have that natural effect on people," Shikamaru shrugged as he flicked the butt somewhere off into the parking lot.

Sasuke didn't even flinch, obviously used to the comments and leisurely strolled to the driver side of the car, calmly opening the door.

"What if I told you I thought that _she_ was a _he_?"

"Your assumptions scare me." The lazy teen stated flatly.

"Why do you say that?"

Sasuke climbed in and started the car calmly, barely looking at his friend, and let the engine come to life with a quick roar that easily died down to a sweet purr.

Shikamaru thought his answer over this time, "Well, let's say that this person really is a boy. How did you come up with that deduction when they're so…they look…"

"I have my ways." Sasuke held up a bobby-pin, ones that can be used for holding on wigs, with a light smirk.

"You scare me."

"And you're walking."

With that, Sasuke peeled out of the parking lot, leaving his best friend standing where he was still waiting to be let inside the car. Shikamaru sighed, pulled out another cigarette, his cell phone, and hoped that Temari wanted to get better acquainted sooner rather than later.

* * *

Naruto sighed as the Suburban pulled up to the curb slowly, his small house in view, and all his lies were about to smack him in the face.

He just thanked every deity known to man he didn't lie about a car.

The blonde wretched the car door open, hoping out of the car with a scowl, and hoping with all hope that Kakashi would stay hidden in the house while Naruto made some excuse for the girls not to come in. Of course he was talking about Kakashi, the man that sought after his sons' public humiliation like it was some type of drug.

Before the blonde could even mention to the girls who were clambering out of the giant vehicle to not waste their time, that his father wasn't home, his front door swung open, and Naruto whipped back around towards the house.

Kiba was standing in the doorway, Kakashi standing next to the fuming boy smiling warmly, and holding on with excessive force.

"Naru-chan! Welcome home sweetheart. Kakashi-kun told me you wouldn't be home for quite some time…"

Naruto imagined it was due to the fact Kiba planned to murder him. Revenge has draw backs.

"Well, dad, I didn't think you two would be here either…" Naruto called back through gritted teeth.

"Of course sweetie!" Kakashi called back all too high pitched, making Kiba cringe, "We wouldn't want to stray and not hear about your first day! Not to mention your new friends have  
brought you home."

"Wow, Naruto-chan, your dad is _really_…" Sakura was at a loss for words.

"Fucking cheery…" Ino finished while her face was still contorted in confusion as she stared at the odd man who was still waving and still smiling.

Naruto began stalking forward, stomping his feet while grumbling, the three girls staying a few paces behind their now suddenly very angry friend.

"Everyone, you've already met my brother, Kakashi," Naruto gave Kiba a forced smile that made the blonde look in pain, while his friend was pulled back closer to Kakashi at a slight movement that hinted at strangulation.

"I'm his father, Naruto Senior," Kakashi said waving lightly, Naruto giving his father a look between confusion, murder, and wanting to die.

"Yes, in case you might have been wondering about my little Naru-chan's boyish name, I couldn't let my name die you see-"

"Dad!" Naruto yelled cutting him off at most likely some long and abnormal story that made no sense.

"It's a pleasure to meet you," Hinata was the first to stick out her hand, causing Kiba to go limp at Kakashi's side.

"It's a pleasure to meet you as well. Won't you all come inside and I'll put some tea on the stove." Kakashi waved airily as he turned on his heel and headed inside toward the kitchen.

Kakashi knew in the presence of strangers even Kiba couldn't kill, and he had given up the hunt for the moment.

Kiba gave Hinata a quick longing glance before looking right back at Naruto, and the thought of staying instantly flickered out.

"I'm going…next door," He gritted out through his teeth, catching himself before saying 'home'. Kakashi had already sat down with him and talked him down, and then reminded him he agreed to all the insanity.

"Oh! Are you friends with Kiba?" Sakura asked instantly remembering her conversation with the blonde.

The two friends were facing each other, Naruto finally aware of his short stature as he glared up at his friend blocking his path, before they both registered at the same time what girl had asked.

"What!?" The two turned to face her, eyebrows raised in confused questioning.

"Well, Naru-chan said that his friend Kiba lived next door." Sakura looked at the blonde skeptically.

"Oh really…" Kiba turned to face the blonde as the words slid out slowly, all the pieces falling into place.

Kiba's sudden name change, how he was suddenly a family member, and Naruto's sudden idea of how he could get Sakura over to the house. The idiot blonde had lured the girl over with a boy, convincing her to meet him, when he was actually dressed as a girl.

How dumb could he possibly get, doing it now, with all the rest of them here now?

"Why don't we all go over and hang out?" Ino suggested lightly.

"Bad idea," Kiba cut in smoothly, not only thinking about all the family photos, but simply saving Naruto and using it against him later.

Everyone gave the tall male a confused look aside Hinata, who was politely looking around the neighborhood as if taking in the sights.

"Dad has tea on, remember? Stick around for awhile."

Naruto felt his stomach turn at the thought of tea, but he noticed the small wink Kiba passed along as he passed him, and caught the suggestive last sentence.

With how Kakashi talked, carried on, and annoyed – they would be begging to leave.

Naruto led the girls into the small house, suddenly embarrassed, noting that Sakura's car most likely cost more than the quaint thing. Kakashi was shuffling out of the kitchen with a tray full of steaming cups toward the living room as the group of four took to sitting on the couches, Naruto passing around a look for forgiveness. Everyone gave a look of understanding.

If they only knew that Kakashi was truly having fun torturing his son.

Kakashi instantly flopped down next to Naruto on the loveseat while the other three girls took seats on the full couch, and politely took their cups of tea.

"So, Naru-chan, how did you meet these three young ladies?" Kakashi added with false sweetness and a gleam of terror.

Naruto loosened his jaw trying to relax, noting Kiba must have passed the murderous feeling along as he left.

"I was lost, and Hinata-chan helped me find my way. These three are best friends."

"Oh, well thank you so kindly Hinata-chan!" Kakashi clapped his hands together with another rocketing high pitch.

The four teens pulled back slightly before Naruto continued on, bringing his father in on all his lies as discreetly as possible.

"I explained to her we just moved here, and she graciously welcomed me," Naruto sipped his tea hoping it would calm his now churning stomach.

The blonde wasn't quite sure if it was the stress, the lies, or all the sweetness his father was radiating, but either way his stomach was tumbling unpleasantly.

"Oh yes, moving was quite a bare. But we had to do what we had to do for my little Naru-chan here." Kakashi patted Naruto's wig lightly, giving the blonde's stomach another quiver at the story he could only imagine that would follow.

"Why did you have to move?" Sakura asked first.

"Oh, well see, my little Naru-chan was being picked on. A rumor had spread that she was… how do you say this…A slut? Yes, a whore," Kakashi continued without even sparing a glance at the blonde sitting next to him.

Naruto's face went to wide with shock, to falling back, looking towards the ceiling calling upon unknown deities to smite his father.

"See, Naru-chan here had a little boyfriend, and what happened between them is there business-"

"You know what!" Naruto announced suddenly, "I think I'm going to go lay down."

The three girls who were looking anywhere between confused and repulsed looked back to their friend with wide eyes, Sakura speaking first.

"Oh, Naru-chan, we don't care. It was just a rumor."

"No," Naruto insisted, an instant plan forming, "My stomach is a little upset."

"Oh dear. Is it diarrhea? We both know how you get when you're nervous and stressed," Kakashi added, announcing more loudly than need be.

"NO! Just _cramps_," Naruto easily lied through the embarrassment, "But I'll tell you what. I'll give Kiba a call to come on over before you guys leave."

The three girls smiled sympathetically and then warmly, "That sounds like a good idea."

Naruto stood up, and after telling each girl goodbye, walked as fast as he could down the small slender hallway towards his room; locking the door in his wake.  
The blonde needed to remember to thank his dad in later years for having his room on the first floor, because in the next few years he would hate him, because that situation was the most uncomfortable, awkward, and worst he had ever been through.

Naruto rushed across his somewhat dirty room to his window, throwing it up and open and instantly lifting himself out as fast as he possibly could before the three girls decided to make their hasty escape out of the house.

Naruto landed with a thud on the grass on his backside, wincing slightly before he scrambled to his feet before taking off towards the gate that led to Kiba's backyard.

The blonde didn't even think of opening it as he hurtled the small wooden blockade, the first time he was thankful for the skirt not constricting his legs, and racing to Kiba's backdoor.  
The blonde began beating upon the glass widely, looking around as if someone would catch him, and that sole reason stopped him from screaming curses at the locked sliding glass door to hurry his friend up.

Kiba was at the door in the next second, the mutinous gleam fully restored in his eyes, but Naruto stopped him by holding up both of his hands.

"You can kill me later! I swear, or at least beat me, but I need some clothes and I need to borrow you!" Naruto said dashing past his friend already unbuttoning the school shirt.

"What do you have in store for me now!?" Kiba called outraged, trailing behind Naruto who was heading straight for his friends' room.

"They want to meet Kiba, as in me without the girl clothes, and your name. So, I'm catching them before they leave, and you're coming along, and buttering up Hinata-chan." Naruto called from Kiba's room, the other teen stopped outside his room and letting his friend change.

"When are you going to stop this madness?" Kiba called as he leaned against the wall, listening to his friend curse as he tried to remove the wig that was fastened all-too-well.

Naruto popped out a minute later, a bright smile on his face as he tried to fluff his hair back to life – it having laid flat for the first time in existence, "When I get the girl."

* * *

Naruto and Kiba walked out of Kiba's house moments later, Naruto back to looking like his boyish self; drowning in his clothes and all. No make-up either, thanks to Kiba pointing that out despite wanting to hear what the girls would say.

Kiba's clothes were a couple sizes too big, but the blonde managed to find an old shirt that fit almost right, and was given a belt so he didn't have to hold up the jeans he was borrowing. The brunette had reminded his friend to roll up the bottom of the pants just as Naruto tripped and fell on his face while walking out of Kiba's room, and then the blonde was supplied a pair of sneakers to top of the ensemble.

"So, you think your dad is still butchering you to death? Well, the female you?" Kiba questioned with an odd face.

"Even though I don't know them that well, I know my dad, and they are probably begging him to leave."

The two were crossing Kiba's driveway, making their way into Naruto's driveway when the sound of a fast approaching car made them stop and turn around.

"Who the hell is speeding around here?" Kiba asked sounding offended.

"Probably some rich jackass passing by, you know how they get with their sports cars…" Naruto mumbled as he turned back around at the sound of his front door opening.

Kakashi was holding the door open for the mortified looking girls as they scrambled out of the house, the blonde making a mental note to only invite them over when he wasn't there and to apologize for weeks.

The blonde approached warily, his heart hammering in his chest at the thought of them finding him out with this bold stunt, but Sakura instantly sighed in relief at the sight of Kiba and him approaching.

"You must be Kiba!" Sakura scrambled away from the still chatting Kakashi, and Ino instantly followed while Hinata was stuck.

Kiba gave the two a smirk going along with Naruto's storyline that he had made up, "Sorry about dad, he can be…a bit much."

Sakura and Ino nodded fervently, "I think that's why Naru-chan ducked out, I think she was embarrassed. We all have embarrassing parents; I hope she realizes we don't care."

Naruto instantly smiled, thinking highly of Sakura, "It's nice to meet you. Naruto called and told me about you all. You must be Sakura and Ino."

Sakura was smiling lightly while Ino was looking around, looking in the direction Kiba was now staring, which was at the expensive sports car that had parked behind Sakura's car.

"Hey _Kiba_," Kiba drew out with hidden sarcasm, "Is this another friend of Naru-chan's you think?"

Naruto turned away from Sakura's kind and beautiful smile, looking at the expensive midnight car that just cut its engine.

"Oh! Wow, how did he know…?" Sakura mumbled.

"How did who know what?" Naruto asked sharply.

The driver side door slowly open and raven hair came into view, and at that moment, Naruto knew that resistance wasn't an option anymore.

War was undeniably inevitable.

**

* * *

**Author's Notes: I enjoyed writing this chapter, which means people won't like it. Also, if you are writing an anonymous review, try not to ask questions. If you remember correctly, I can't reply to answer them.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five** – I Got the Boy Instead

**Author's Notes**: I was uncomfortable writing this chapter solely because I am used to relationship development… not having Sasuke stalk Naruto. It's weird. So, if you see things out-of-place, or you aren't used to this style from me, I apologize.  
Something I want to address: I'll get to things in due time. Like how Sasuke found Naruto, and those two boys…you know. Don't harass me. It's not very influential.

**Dedication**: To three people:  
Resuna – again. She told me I could fucking procrastinate… Not update soon, but procrastinate. Okay, I love all of you, you should all know this, but that was the NICEST thing any author could hear.  
disArmingAngles – her review was amazing, and so articulate. It was something I couldn't read half asleep.  
As well as my sponsor _Rebecca_who made it so I kept writing, because I was on the verge of quitting… I owe her my life.  
And of course: Everyone who reviewed and is showing love for my fiction… it's something I never expected.

**Warnings:** Boys kissing boys, blackmail, and foul language.

**Rating**: T for giving me a migraine.

**Chapter Five** – I Got the Boy Instead

* * *

Sasuke casually got out of his car, the small white strip of paper in his hands, and a small smirk caressing his full lips.

Game on.

There was a small crowd already outside of the small house that had the address he was searching for, and if his hunch of right, the person he was looking for would be standing there.

Dressed properly.

"Sasuke-kun! What brings you here!?" Sakura called next to Naruto with a hint of a blush now painting her cheeks.

"Oh, well, I came to see Naru-chan. I feel bad we started off on the wrong foot, and I wanted to try again." Sasuke said politely as he approached.

Kiba inched closer to Naruto as the blonde slowly crept away, "Who the hell is that?"

"My worst fucking nightmare!" Naruto whispered back harshly through gritted teeth; he was smiling widely trying to act casual.

"Who?" Kiba tried to ask again.

"He won't leave me alone…the girl me."

Kiba snorted, "Should I be an over protective brother?"

"_Something_! Save me!" Naruto hissed.

Sakura and Ino were talking to Sasuke who, for the first time, didn't seem bothered while Hinata struggled to get away from Kakashi.

"Kiba-kun, Kakashi-kun! This is Sasuke-kun, he's the Senior class president from Academia," Sakura gushed making the bile rise in the back of Naruto's throat.

"Sasuke-kun, this is Kakashi-kun, Naru-chan's brother and Kiba-kun, Naru-chan's friend," Sakura introduced.

Sasuke's eyes instantly landed on Naruto while the smirk became more pronounced on his face, his hand reaching out for a quick gesture in greeting, "It's a pleasure."

Naruto visibly shivered at the sudden change in tone of his voice, the odd twinkling and mischievous glint in his eye, and the devious smirk that crossed his face. But that tone, that slick, suave, and alluring tone made Naruto crinkle his nose girlishly without thinking.

"Be a good boy, Kiba-kun," Kakashi suddenly chirped from next to the blonde who was contemplating breaking each individual finger of Sasuke's by a non-existent mind power.

"Good afternoon, I'm Sasuke Uchiha," Sasuke extended his hand towards the real Kakashi, who grinned and accepted it.

Another soul to torture and mentally scar. Kakashi's eyes twinkled, oh how he was suddenly ecstatic.

"It's a pleasure to meet you Sasuke-kun, what to I owe the pleasure of this visit? Surely you didn't meet my little Naru-chan?" Kakashi asked in a shocked whisper like a teenaged girl spreading dirty gossip.

Kiba snorted and Naruto glared.

Sasuke slipped on his composure for a fraction of a second before continuing on, "Why yes I did. She's…quite something."

Sasuke reframed from saying rude, blunt, and dresses in drag.

"Would you like to come in and see her?"

Naruto and Kiba snapped their heads towards Kakashi who was smiling warmly, their eyes big, their mouths starting to hang open.

What a bastard.

Again, Sasuke lost his composure, the seconds ticking by this time as he fumbled over his words, "J-just you and I, and her?"

Sasuke coal eyes flicked to Naruto whose azure eyes were glaring towards the older man, not catching the hidden meaning.

If the boy was going to stay here, and then he went in there with _her_ and her father…

Oh shit.

"I'm sure she'd be very happy to see you." Kakashi began to coax him along.

Ino snorted, "Yeah, until she vomits on him."

Sakura smack her arm lightly, "We'll see you around Sasuke-kun!"

The group of five teens watched as the raven was literally dragged into the house by the one and only adult that was far from responsible.

Sasuke turned to look back at the group just in time to see the blonde grinning triumphantly at him; almost mockingly at him.

But Sasuke just smirked back. He was game.

Sakura turned back to Naruto and Kiba, a hunt of blush still tinting her cheeks from her brief run in with Sasuke.

"So Kakashi-kun," Ino began, but was suddenly cut off by Naruto.

"I'm sorry to cut this short, but Naru-chan did call us over in the middle of something, so I'm afraid we're going to have to cut this encounter short." Naruto said as calmly as possible.

Naruto imagined this was the anger Kiba felt when Naruto decided to be a jerk and kiss him. Between watching his crush gushing over another guy and having said guy stalking you,  
Naruto was pissed.

Sakura opened her mouth to ask what, but Kiba's was finally about to get his revenge.

"What were you two up too?" Sakura asked in hopes to maybe start something that would end up in everyone hanging out.

"We were shifting through porn sites." Kiba deadpanned crudely.

Naruto's face suddenly bloomed into a wide expression of shock, his face turning slowly towards the other teen with a murderous look forming, but Kiba was smiling with an air of smugness.

Ino and Sakura's face had upturned into a disgusted grimace, while Hinata actually giggled in the background.

"Well…uh…huh, I guess we'll let you get back…to that…?" Ino's face was scrunching up with each passing word while Kiba's I-just-filled-the-toilet grin grew.

Naruto on the other hand, wondered how much trouble he could possibly get in for smashing Kiba's face in through the pale bastard's car. Naruto weighed his options mentally for a split second, and decided he didn't care as it was a win-win situation.

Bust Kiba's head and possibly send him into a coma and break that douche's car.

Naruto tried to regain some of his composure, trying to remove the murderous spark from his eyes as he spoke, "I'd say we should try this again sometime, but Kakashi has a way of scaring people away."

Kiba bit his bottom lip, keeping himself from laughing in the girl's faces or smiling like some idiot at the discreet joke; the name suddenly had a double meaning that was hilarious.

Hinata was still smiling, but spoke for the other girls, "Of course."

Sakura and Ino turned to look at the girl with confused faces mixed with hints of disgust.

"How…_thoughtful_ of you, Hinata," Ino strained.

Sakura looked over Kiba, "Well, it can't be helped. You _are_ Naru-chan's brother, and you are Naru-chan's good friend. I suppose we'll run into each other…"

Kiba smirked at the three girls while Naruto glared at Kiba.

The blonde began to speak not removing his eyes, "Yes, we'll all see each other around. Let's get going, Kakashi."

"Okay Kiba, that one website looked promising-"

Naruto's fist connecting hard with Kiba's arm caused his mouth to shut and a pained expression to flicker across his face; his hand rubbing the newly sore spot tenderly.

The three girls slowly made their leave, Ino and Sakura instantly turning on Hinata the second they were out of ear shot and at the car, but Naruto could distinctly hear Sakura asking 'what was wrong with her'.

Naruto rounded on Kiba immediately, praying that Kakashi was still stalling and maybe torturing the cocky bastard in his grasps.

"What the _hell_ was _that_!" Naruto held his hand open towards the car that was screeching off from the curb with Sakura at the wheel.

Kakashi might have had something to add to it, but an experience like that had you running for your life.

"Did you forget she's _the reason_ behind all of this? Or did that slip your mind?" Naruto shot.

"You did kiss me," Kiba reminded him quickly with a triumphant smirk that received another hard jab.

"Damn! For a girl, you sure as hell hit hard!" Kiba shot as he rubbed the new sort spot.

Naruto sighed in an exasperated manner, "Well how the hell am I supposed to explain to them all that 'porn' shit?"

"Explain to Sakura that I like being a jerk to you, and as an older brother, I like embarrassing her – you… you get the idea." Kiba said somewhat smoothly.

He had thankfully thought it over before going through with his 'get back at Naruto' plan.

Maybe. Hopefully? Nope, not so much.

The blonde snapped his fingers, "Brilliant! Now let's get moving, I have to change!"

* * *

"_Annnd_ this is a picture of me on a trip to Miami…" Kakashi flipped the page in the photo album.

The album _before_ Naruto.

Sasuke was running over ways in his head to escape, having decided that perusing the blonde was moronic as his guards were impassable, and torturing was indeed a low blow.  
Either that or he could try and find a way to rig his cell phone to blow up in hopes it would kill him, because it was the only thing he had on him. And cutting his wrist with his identification card really wasn't looking too promising.

"Are you sure Naru-chan is coming out of her room?" Sasuke questioned with a little more hiss in his voice than he intended.

"_Annnd_ this is a picture – Whoops!" Kakashi flicked the page quickly having come upon some pictures of a college party of his, "Is obviously a picture you can't see!"

Sasuke let his eyes flutter shut and calmed his breathing, wondering if he could possibly get in _that_ much trouble for murder. Really, could one man be this annoying and sweet. It was disturbing.

"How about a tour of your wonderful home?" Sasuke asked as sweetly as possible without making himself sick as another plan formed.

A loud crash rang through the house, coming from somewhere down the hall that the two were now currently staring down, and suddenly a few lower crashes and rustling could be heard.

Cussing could be heard mixed with Kakashi's name if you listened close enough, and by Kakashi's warm and loving smirk, he was used to listening to it.

The older man took his cue, "That would be Naru-chan having woken from her nap, if you'd excuse me."

Sasuke's forehead wrinkled, having not heard Naruto cussing at Kiba for shoving him through his window unceremoniously onto his face, and cussing Kakashi because it was just convenient.

"The damn shoes! No dick! Not the fucking skirt! _Shoes!"_ Naruto hissed venomously as he leaned out the window to Kiba who was holding everything that completed the girl of Naruto.

Fake boobs and all.

The blonde would have laughed at the wig that was draped over Kiba's head if he wasn't panicking at the fact that some stalker was lingering in his living room making polite conversation with his diabolical and cynical father.

How screwed up can life get in one day?

Kiba threw a shoe at Naruto's face to snap him back to reality, causing the blonde to grab something random and beam it at him, "Just throw everything through the window! I have to  
find those damnable outfits Kakashi bought!"

"These?"

Naruto jumped around, smacking himself against the wall while clutching at his chest, and without really meaning too, managed to screech like a girl in the process causing Kiba to laugh hysterically.

Kakashi was holding up two plastic shopping bags in his hands, a light frown etched on his face, "Did I scare you, Naruto-kun?"

"Did you kill him, dad? It's our only hope!"

Kakashi dropped the bags at his feet and gracefully caught the wig that flew through the window, "No, so go out there and make a good impression. I like him, so I hope you keep him around."

Sasuke snapped his head back towards the hallway as another girlish scream ripped through the hallway, more cussing, and more crashes.

The raven stood up, in between leaving and checking on everyone's safety before the door Kakashi had disappeared into slammed open against a wall, and Naruto came stumbling out as if someone had pushed _her._

Well, threw was more like it, he was struggling after all.

Naruto went to turn around at his father, sounding like a girl or a boy – he didn't care, but his father said something about cleaning up a little and giving him privacy, and slammed the door shut in his face.

Naruto let his eyelids flutter shut in a calming manner, his now longer eyelashes casting the light beautiful shadows on his cheek bones that Kakashi had expertly lightly dusted with blush. The blonde wig had been taken out of the pig tails and simply left to hang limp and un-styled, even though Naruto's father had squealed and rambled off a slew of hair styles that sounded too complicated. The outfit. The blonde knew as he swiveled on the spot – bright pink sneakers this time around – that Kakashi was out to make this experience a living hell.

Naruto _hated_ pink. It was the one color Naruto couldn't stand. With every part of his being. He _loved_ orange. Pink _was not_ orange. So instead of Kakashi getting _orange_, what did Kakashi get? You guessed it! The most disgusting color known to man – literally. _Everything_, he bought was pink – everything.

What _guy_ liked pink?

So now, Naruto was stuck in a pink skirt that was dangerously close to a mini that was decorated with a few small flowers, a dark pink tank top, and a light pink button up over shirt. How Kakashi could manage to hide Naruto's fake breasts, the blonde sighed; he still couldn't figure out how he did it in such a tiny shirt. Then, to top it off and most likely send Naruto's anger level and blood pressure to an extremely dangerous level, Kakashi insisted on the pink leg warmers because 'it showed off his _cute_ legs'.

Sasuke was standing at the couch, inching away from the photo album as Naruto approached him, his lightly painted lips pulled back over his sneer in a grimace as the raven approached him.

"I hope you don't mind the intrusion." Sasuke began.

"Too late, teme." Naruto shot back, barely holding his girlish voice through the anger.

Sasuke cleared his throat, hoping to clear the rude comment, "I just noticed we got off on the wrong foot, and I wanted to try again."

"Too late comes to mind," Naruto sneered.

"Oh, well, will you at least walk me to my car?" Sasuke leaned forward just slightly with a hint of an alluring smirk.

Naruto noticed the sultry and seductive hint that was laced back in the raven's voice, and the smirk that graced his features along side it was working Naruto's gag reflex to his limit.

"I will-"

"Most defiantly walk you to your car!" Kakashi interrupted Naruto smoothly; causing what seemed like sparks to shoot out of the blonde's clear blue eyes as he rounded on his father.

What a sick, sadistic, twisted, masochistic _jackass_ his father was.

Naruto felt like doom was inevitable, as stalked off towards the door, Kakashi swearing he could see a tiny little dark cloud looming over his son's head as he mumbled obscenities towards the door. He _must_ be upset.

Naruto ripped the main door open, and kicked the glass door open not really giving a damn whether or not if it was going to shatter – again.

Sasuke calmly followed the blonde, a little unsure if he had unleashed a wrath that should have not been released, but followed closely behind none-the-less; noting the smell of cologne.

What an idiot.

Naruto turned around as soon as he reached Sasuke's car, his arms instantly snaking across his chest, and a scowl set on his face.

"Happy? Here's your damnable car," Naruto said as girlishly as possibly, barely managing to get it out.

Sasuke gave him an unbelieving look, "What cologne are you wearing, _dobe_?"

The blonde noticed the sweetness in Sasuke's voice was disappearing, and the tone of catching something tasty was growing more pronounced.  
Naruto's eyes flickered open a fraction wider than they were, forgetting he had thrown on some of Kiba's 'Adidas' cologne before rushing out to Sakura.

Oh shit.

"What are you talking about, Sasuke-kun?" Naruto tried to butter up the sudden hysterics that was creeping into his voice. Naruto batted his eye lashes and slapped on an innocent smile that usually had Kakashi buying him things he usually wouldn't.

"And briefs? Is that because boxers would hang out of the skirt, or are you scared your dick would show?" Sasuke's eyes shrank into a glare; an all knowing glare.

"I don't know what you're talking about…" Naruto couldn't believe he was whispering in disbelief, because if anything, that was giving himself away more, but he couldn't believe this guy had caught him so quickly.

Kiba and Kakashi had bet on at least a week, fifty dollars even.

"And how many of _these_," Sasuke held up the tiny bobby-pin, "take to hold on that wig of yours?"

Naruto gritted his teeth and balled up his fists, "Alright, what the hell do you fucking want, Uchiha?"

Sasuke's smirk grew, making Naruto shake in a sudden fit of rage, "What the hell do I have to do for you to keep your mouth shut?"

Bad choice of words.

Sasuke leaned forward, causing Naruto to instantly smack back into his car, the blonde couldn't believe he was trapped and pinned by the raven. But Sasuke's hands and arms were like bars, and his body was like a jail cell, Naruto was trapped.

The raven leaned his pale, ivory skinned face in, his nose almost touching Naruto's but stopping just shy as soon as he felt the other boy shiver.  
Without realizing it, Naruto felt the heat rise in his cheeks, no doubt doubling the redness of the blush already covering them, but still remained unstaring with a glare at the now space-invading Uchiha.

"You be mine."

Naruto snapped his head back in disbelief, only to have it snap back and hit the car.

"Ow! Shit! _YOURS!_ Are you out of your fucking mind!? You do know I have family jewels swinging along with this skirt, right?"

It was Sasuke's turn to snap his head back a little at the blonde's crudeness, really, he knew guys could be crude, but calm down.

"Hear me out, dobe." Sasuke tried slyly.

"NO, TEME!" Naruto roared.

"Then should I go talk to Sakura, because she always wants to see me. She has this little obsession…" Sasuke mocked in Naruto's face.

Naruto's teeth began to grind together in frustration and anger. How had this bastard figured everything out so quickly?

"You pose as my girlfriend for the rest of the year, keep the rest of the girls off of my damn back, and I'll keep my lips sealed."

"You can't get another _real girl_ to do this?"

"In case you haven't noticed Naruto, you make a good looking girl, and I need one with a fighting spirit, you know," Sasuke leaned in, his lips ghosting against Naruto's as he spoke  
causing his blue eyes to go wide, "One that will be _proud_ that she's with me."

Naruto instantly shot his hands out to Sasuke's shoulders, and pushed as hard as he could at that moment, but with his body shaking, it didn't work as well as Naruto had hoped.

"But," Sasuke shrugged, "If not, I'm sure Sakura won't care about hearing that you're a boy… right?"

Naruto was trying to take deep calming breaths, slow and steady, as his body shook from rage and shock; nothing was calming him.

Murder scenes played out behind his eyelids, his favorite one was drowning Sasuke in a bucket of his own hair gel, or managing to stab him with a spike off of the back of his head. As long as the bastard was dead he could manage to smile, but as soon as his eyelids fluttered opened, and Sasuke's mocking smirk stared back at him, it turned into a scowl.

"Just till the end of the year?" Naruto questioned with an air of defeat.

"That's it," Sasuke reassured, his eyes glinting with something unsaid.

"Fine…," Naruto sighed, utterly defeated and desperate to get out of the breezy skirt and chafing bra, "deal."

* * *

Author's Notes: OKAY! Again, if this seems off, I'm stepping out of my comforting zone… my safe little comfort zone. I'm not used to jumping into things with the characters, so again, if it seems off, it's going to happen.  
SO I posted this early as a Merry Christmas/Happy New Years gift, so give me time before I update the next chapter, _no rushing_.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six **– How Do You Tie This Thing?

**Author's Notes**: The quote mentions God, and some people might take it in offence. So here I am, warning you, to get over it. Voltair (who by the way is a fucking genius), said something absolutely hilarious that goes along with this fiction. Enjoy it.

_**Also**__:_ I'd like to _once again_ address Sasuke and Naruto and their…situation? Meh. I've been getting PMs about the 'boom-boom', and I'm telling you now, I'm forcing them along as fast as I can. I can't have Sasuke, yeah know, like rape him in school or something… that's not so funny. So just give me some time _please_. If not, you do know there are a TON more dirty fanfictions roaming around, right?

**Dedication**: medicfire – Because this dedicated fan and a sweet review made my New Years..  
But also, everyone who reviewed, really? I'm glad you guys are finding this so funny and are enjoying it so (and are taking the time to review). I never thought it would be so popular.

**Warnings**: Yay foul language. Yay typos, spelling errors and grammatical mistakes. And huzzah for boys flirting with other boys.

**Disclaimer**: I don't own it, and if I did, well…who knows. I don't own the Matrix either…just no.

**Chapter Six** – How Do You Tie This Thing?

"I have made but one prayer to God, a very short one: 'O Lord, make my enemies ridiculous.' And God granted it."  
-Voltair

By request (and a smart request too)…  
Here is a list of who the hell is who:  
Kiba – Kakashi  
Kakashi – Naruto Senior  
Naruto – Naruto Junior or Naru-chan (WHEN A GIRL!)  
Naruto – Kiba (WHEN A BOY!)  
Sasuke – Bastard-stalker… Well… technically, he was like that when I found him.

* * *

"So let me get this straight…" Kiba began, "You have to be his _girlfriend_?"

Naruto was currently beating his head against a wall in a sad rhythm, hoping with all hope he'd give himself a concussion, or better yet, put himself into a coma.

"Did you tell Kakashi-san?" Kiba questioned lightly amused at his friends' rhythmic antics.

The blonde's head instantly froze in the air, half-way to beating itself against the wall, and blue eyes narrowed in a sharp glare.

"Are you fucking insane?"

Smack.

"I am your friend, and your _brother_. So apparently…" Kiba mused.

"Kakashi would have a fucking field day…He seriously would. Me being roped into posing as someone's girlfriend. Jeez, I can't even imagine."

Smack.

"Oh, I can!" Kakashi chirped behind Naruto, crouching down to his son's level.

The two boys squawked.

Kiba pointed a finger, "How the hell did you get in my house? I locked the doors!"

Kakashi gave the boy a weary look, "I do have a key, Kiba-kun. Remember?"

The older man held up the tiny object that twinkled in the light, the one that had been given to him by Kiba's mother for emergencies and when they were out of town.

"You know the neighbor thing…" Kakashi reminded him.

Smack.

"Naruto-kun, must you beat yourself?" Kakashi asked softly next to his son.

Smack. Smack. Smack. Smack. Smack.

Kakashi exhaled slowly, giving Kiba a look of disappointment, he pulled his son away from the wall, leaving his head to bob hopelessly to his shoulder.

"What's so bad about _pretending_ to be someone's girlfriend?" Kakashi asked lightly.

Naruto began crawling back towards the wall, his head inching closer and closer to the hard flat service of his untimely death (if he just hit hard enough) but Kakashi smoothly grabbed him by his ankles and dragged him a few feet away.

Naruto groaned and Kiba gagged.

"Naruto, will you go _change_!"

The blonde had ripped the wig off, very painfully, as soon as he entered Kiba's house; leaving on the make-up and pink female clothes on in his attempt to knock himself out into the next year.

"You're freaking me out!" Kiba called from looking another direction.

He could stand looking at Naruto with all the make-up, clothes, and wig on; he could just pretend it was someone else. But, with some little piece missing in that equation, it was frightening.

It looked weird.

Smack.

The blonde had suddenly taken notice that they were on a hardwood floor.

Smack. Smack. Smack.

Kakashi scooped Naruto up and slung him over his shoulder, "Why is it so bad Naruto-kun?"

Kiba blanched and looked away as Naruto's ass stuck out in the air, covered by underwear, but still out there swinging hopelessly.

Just gross.

Naruto mumbled something inaudible in defeat against Kakashi's back, the older man swinging the boy around to face his friend.

"What, blondie?" Kiba said grimacing.

He was going to have awkward images of Naruto stuck in his head for the rest of his life, and he was hating the blonde for that right now.

"_I_ wanted to get a girlfriend. Not be someone's girlfriend."

* * *

Sasuke stood in front of his mirror, in between smirking with an air of cockiness and scowling with an air of irritability.

Today was the first day the blonde was playing girlfriend.

Today was another day wrestling with the damnable tie.

"Come here, Uchiha. Why people think you're great…" Shikamaru approached his best friend with a bored look.

Why people found it necessary to straighten his tie…

Sasuke turned to face him, this time a death glare present, "You tell a fucking soul-"

"You kill me and all that nonsense." Shikamaru waved him off as he stripped off the tie and started over, draping it around the collar of his friend's shirt.

"How can you _not_ tie a tie? Not so good with your fingers?" The other boy teased.

"I. Will. Kill. You." Sasuke strained out through clenched teeth.

"I know, I know. Slowly and painfully," Shikamaru tugged at the now tied perfectly straight tie till so it was comfortably tight around Sasuke's neck.

"And in your fucking sleep…" Sasuke reminded him with a growl.

Shikamaru had the audacity to reach his hand up and pat his friend on the head twice before Sasuke's hand finally snapped out and punched his friend in the arm, as hard as he could, leaving Shikamaru rubbing the sore spot with a permanent wince mixed with a smile.

"So, what car are we taking exactly?"

Sasuke glared over at his friend, "I don't know… I wanted to drive the Corvette today but it won't fit all of us."

Sasuke had barely filled the spiky boy in, simply saying that they were picking up the little blonde and they were now dating. No questions because that was all he was getting.

Sasuke's previous thought of Naruto being a boy left to hang in the air, but only for Shikamaru.

"I still don't know how you managed to woo her after she was managing to hold back murdering you… I could see the glint in her eyes."

Sasuke turned to glare a death glare at his friend.

"Yes, that same look." Shikamaru noted lightly as he flopped down in his favorite chair of Sasuke's.

Sasuke ignored the sudden twitching sensation of his right eyes while he mentally ran over all the cars he could take. Everything he liked was a two-seater, and most of the flashy cars were only two seats.

"Why do you need to impress her?" Shikmaru questioned as he stared up at the ceiling, reading Sasuke's mind as usual.

Again, Sasuke's eye twitched, "I'm _not_ trying to impress her."

Him, idiot. It's a him.

"Just take the Corvette, I'll meet you two at the school." Shikamaru sighed as he stood, yanking out his cell phone.

"What, are you going to fly?"

The teen waved the cellular device in his wake as he made his leave, "I'm starting to _really_ like that Temari girl. I think if I sweet talk her enough, she'll beat your sorry ass for me."

Sasuke made a sound of disbelief as he fiddled in the mirror with his hair, which was what usually took him the greater amount of the morning, until something usually moved him along.

If it wasn't Shikmaru, it was always-

Sasuke felt hands grip his shoulders, his eyes barely being able to lock onto the pale vice grips from hell before he was snapped around to face the indifferent face of his brother.

"Itachi!" Sasuke glared the best glare he could muster, but the older raven simple ruffled his younger sibling's hair after watching the teen desperately try to get each individual hair in place.

Sasuke glared harder while Itachi smirked.

"Otouto, your tie is crooked…" Itachi began tugging at the knot at his brother's neck.

Sasuke's delicate eyebrow raised as he looked down, the right brow began twitching with annoyance, "Nara just straightened it…"

"You really let him? You believed he was straightening it? Oh, Otouto…" Itachi tugged after jerking the tie around, causing Sasuke to clench and grind his teeth in annoyance.

Must everyone straighten his tie?

"So, who is she?"

"Excuse-fucking-me?" Sasuke's midnight eyes snapped up to the taller, older male, while said man brushed his little brother's shoulders; ridding him of invisible dust and wrinkles.

"Oh, you just have that malicious glint. Not to mention you have been working yourself over the mirror longer than usual," Itachi mused while he stepped back and admired his handy work.

More crooked than before. Perfect.

* * *

"Come on, dad, this is ridiculous!" Naruto wailed.

Kakashi tied the last missing piece and stepped back with a clap of his hands, "Oh! Best style yet!"

The blonde clenched his teeth as he eyed the two braids on either side of his head, a few short strands perfectly hanging loose to frame his face, and Kakashi took it upon himself to curl them sweetly.

What an asshole.

"Your hair has to be perfect, this is your first day with your _boyfriend_," The older man drew out.

Naruto jumped up out of the chair and spun around to glare at his father, "Really!? Are you serious? Must you constantly-"

Kakashi placed his index finger to his temple with false confusion, "I thought you were Sasuke-kun's-"

"Okay, okay! Enough! What did you set up!?" Naruto snapped.

"Set up what, queer bag?" Kiba stepped into the living room having come through the back door like every day, his school bag slung over his shoulder, and the sleep still apparent in his face.

The blonde spun around, glaring, but, the menacing gesture failed. Kakashi had 'innocently' 'grabbed' his son while Naruto was in the middle of changing for school.

In all honesty, Kakashi planned yanking his son out of his room, dragging him to the living room, and torturing him in a girlish hell. But the blue-eyed beauty being half ready was just a mere bonus.

So, Naruto, the poor teen, had managed to get half of everything on. The distressed scream Kiba had heard this morning that had actually woken him from his wonderful slumber was now apparent.

Naruto had one arm inside of his school shirt while his bra was on backwards, a fake breast was stuck randomly to his shoulder; Kiba couldn't figure that one out. Naruto's skirt was flared up on one side showing off his toned, bronzed, thigh making the taller teen gag, while Naruto had one high-heel on, and one fox slipper on the other foot.

At least his hair and make-up were beyond perfection.

"I'm _not_ gay!" Naruto yelled.

Kiba snorted, "Says the guy in a bra…"

The blonde screeched out what was most likely supposed to be a growl before he stormed past his best friend and father, walking like a pirate in his want-to-be dramatic, angry exit.

Kiba couldn't help but call after him, "What's wrong, Naru-chan?"

Naruto snapped back around, eyes lit with fury, "Fuck with me again, and I'll kiss you in front of _both_ our schools."

Kiba's head snapped back as the blonde marched in his room and slammed the door as hard as he possibly could.

Kiba turned to Kakashi with a twisted look of utter confusion torn between utter hilarity, "Yeah, and he says he's not gay."

* * *

Sasuke contemplated between honking the horn or walking to the door. The blonde seemed like the type to be dissatisfied either way; it was a surprise after all. The raven sighed before cutting the engine and stepping out of the sleek car; running a hand down his tie and then threw his bangs.

The raven had come to the conclusion that something was _seriously_ wrong with Naruto's father. There was no way that the blonde could just skate by unnoticed, cross-dressing, and attending an all-girl's school. His father was fine with it, it seemed. Then, Kakashi had the nerve to contact the school, get Sasuke's information, and ask the raven to pick the blonde up.  
_  
Something_ was _wrong_ with that man.

But the raven could always use it to his advantage.

The raven approached the door while adjusting the sleek, small sunglasses that perfectly adorned his face before fitting a smirk on his lips, raising his hands and knocking obnoxiously.

Here we go.

Sasuke could suddenly hear yelling, and cursing, and something about 'killing whoever was at the fucking door'.

That had to be Naruto.

Sasuke waited patiently, or really, as patiently as he could while the vein in his temple became more pronounced as he heard the blonde butcher him to death as said blonde came stomping towards the door.

Naruto was screaming, "I don't know who would date that ugly bastard anyway, dad! He thinks he's so fucking cool! Little fag-"

Naruto had opened the door to find Sasuke trying to glare through the dark tint at the blonde who looked like he had been shot. The devil himself was on his front door step, but he recovered quickly.

"Hey, Neo. Matrix not treating you right? Not gay enough for you?" Naruto waved his heels that were in his hand at Sasuke like it was supposed to be a threat.

"Says the guy in a skirt," Sasuke clipped.

"GUH! I'm not- whatever…What in the _hell_ are _you_ doing at my house - again!?" Naruto wailed, his braids flapping.

Sasuke's eyebrow rose just slightly wondering what type of reaction this answer would cause, "I'm here to take you to school."

Naruto paused staring for one second, then two seconds, and then three before Kakashi walked up behind his son waving kindly to Satan himself.

Naruto turned slowly around to his father who was still smiling and still waving, his face full of murder and hate.

Yeah, he was going to kill the son-of-a-bitch.

"You set me up…to go to school with him?" Naruto's voice squeaked randomly while trying to hold back from screaming.

Kakashi smiled, "Of course Naru-"

But Kakashi couldn't finish his sentence as his son had leap onto him, screaming and cursing, yelling and wailing, and punching at absolutely nothing seeing as how he kept missing.

Kiba appeared suddenly next to Sasuke with a bored look, looking on through the open door. He had gone home to retrieve something, and noticed Sasuke.

"Hey."

Sasuke's eyes flicked to teen through his glasses before returning back to Naruto who had been slung over his father's shoulder, ass waving in the air.

"Hey."

"You picking him up?" Kiba's voice was drawn out and tired, he couldn't care less.

"Hn."

"Huh?"

Kakashi preformed the back breaker on Naruto, covering the boy for the three count, but Naruto raised his arm just at two and a half.

"I take it they like wrestling?" Sasuke questioned looking on, a bored tone laced in his voice.

"Yeah, Naruto is addicted to it."

"He knows it's fake, right?"

But really, with how badly Kakashi was hurting him, he didn't, not right now at least.

Kakashi was setting up Naruto for a pile driver, which caused Kiba to look away looking ill; Naruto being held upside down and his skirt falling that way as well, his shirt riding up enough for his stomach to show.

Sasuke's eyes danced over the small strip of stomach; flat but lightly etched. His legs caused Sasuke's mouth to slacken a bit, the bronze skin that stretched over every inch of his lean muscle made him look like some type of statue sent from the heavens.

The raven shook himself slightly.

What in the hell was that? Uchiha's don't go into trances.

Kiba had turned back around at the sound of smacking, "Good, he's tapping out."

Sasuke looked back to Naruto, some sort of painful leg twisting hold had been put on him while Sasuke was in his dream weaving, drool worthy trance of Naruto.

"Finally," Sasuke whispered, "Alright, let's go!"

Naruto made a noise of discontent from the floor where he was catching his breath, his face flushed, "Yeah, yeah, queer-eye, calm yourself."

* * *

Naruto stumbled out of the house a few moments later with his school bag slung over his shoulder, grumbling about gay bastards and psycho fathers.

Sasuke was leaning gently against his car, a delicate eyebrow lightly raised in question as the blonde stomped, and well, stumbled, towards the car.

"Alright!" The blonde announced upon arrival in front of the raven, "Let's get this over with."

Sasuke chuckled darkly, "You do remember that this is going to last the year, right princess?"

Naruto puffed his cheeks at the word, "Fuck you, fag-fuck."

Sasuke's counter was for sheer amusement, "Well, if you insist."

"GUH!" Naruto screeched, balling his fists up before taking a deep calming breath, "Can you at least grant me the decency to be nice? We are doing this till the end of the year."

Sasuke snorted, "_You_ are doing this till the end of the year. _You're_ mine till the end of the year. Remember? I'll do as I please."

Cocky, dick-head, jackass, mother-fucker and to top it off, a bastard.

That's what Naruto would have said to Sasuke if he wasn't scared the diabolical bastard would expose him like front page news.

What a douche.

Sasuke leaned forward, leaning down just so slightly, into the blonde's comfort zone so his breath would ghost his face, "Ready to finally go, _princess_?"

So, Naruto being Naruto, and ready for any challenge and making up a plan at the drop of a hat; reached up and grabbed a hold of Sasuke's tie. Swallowing every ounce of pride Naruto reached forward with a tug and straightened the raven's tie while an amused spark lit in Sasuke's eyes.

"So," Naruto's voice began smoothly in a whisper causing a crease to form on Sasuke's forehead, "If I play nice, will you play with me?"

Bad choice of words – again.

Can't the boy think and speak properly?

Sasuke technically correct him, tell him he should add 'along' in that sentence, but really, what fun would that be?

He'd play with Naruto _any_ day.

But Sasuke simply smirked while eyeing the nimble fingers of the blonde, "Sure. Why not?"

Tied perfect. Finally.

* * *

Author's Notes: My regular fans know that I do these 'filler chapters' where they are just there, bridging the gap and are more amusing than time skips. This was something like that…it continues the story line, but it's nothing big deal. I had been wanting to write an embarrassing scene with Sasuke for the longest time, and this was the time. In all honesty, even though I'm a girl, my guy friends have tried to tell me how to tie a tie a billion times… A, yeah, not happening.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven** - He Said, She Said

**Author's Notes**: I don't know, except I need a vacation. A long one.  
It took me till this chapter that I realized that I don't know where half the plot is. I'll find it eventually

**Warnings**: Wow, uh… me giving Naruto a suprise.

**Disclaimer**: I don't own the comedians mentioned… though, George Carlin as my grandfather would have been the COOLEST thing ever. I _obviously_ don't own HBO, and yeah, no Naruto. If I missed something, I don't own it. BUT, if you want to give me a '65 stingray Corvette, it would be much appreciated.

**Rating**: T – For, A lot of foul language, and some other things. Wahoo.

**Chapter Seven** – He Said, She Said

* * *

The blonde slammed the door shut in his wake, waiting for the raven monster to come around and drive him to his death – hopefully.

The raven opened the door and climbed in, digging the key into the ignition and letting the car roar to life.

Naruto eyed the dashboard with a repressed alarm look, "Why do you have a car built for racing?"

Sasuke eyed the flips and switches, the extra gages that really shouldn't be there that were mounted, and the ever popular red button.

The raven shrugged, "We bought it from someone who obviously raced."

Sasuke pulled away from the curb with a board-as-hell, kill-me-now look while Naruto continued on.

"First off, you don't have racing _tires_ on your car, so I hope you haven't been using your spray, and secondly, what in the _fuck_ did you do to your muffler?" Naruto said in one whoosh of a breath.

"What?"

Sure, Sasuke wasn't a morning person, but this was really testing him.

Maybe this wasn't such a good idea?

Sasuke turned to stare at Naruto while the blonde was shifting through his glove box, yeah, no, it really wasn't. Sasuke was going to eventually kill him. Nice legs and looking good in a skirt doesn't cover for annoyance.

"- so if I could just take a look…"

Sasuke blinked, his mental musing had muted Naruto, which had to be some type of feat, and missed everything the blonde said.

"Look at what?"

"Your shit-tastic radio, its pretty shotty. The installation work is poorly done too."

"Do you know how much I _paid_ to get that installed?" Sasuke growled.

"Oh geez, did you spend all your allowance on it Sasu-tan? Poor baby."

"Don't push me, remember…?"

"Just because I'm telling you the truth about your radio? Not to mention it sounds like there is a unicorn taking a shit in your muffler."

"Excuse me?" Sasuke asked while he took his eyes off the road to give the most disgusted face he could muster to the blonde.

"Dane Cook?"

"Who?"

"He's a stand-up comic."

"A _what_?"

"Figured _you_ wouldn't know what comedy is. Anyone? Dane Cook, Jeff Dunham, Ralphie May, Mitch Hedberg, Richard Pryor, George Carlin…?" Naruto rambled his favorite stand-up  
comedians.

"George Carlin I've heard."

"There's hope for you yet."

Sasuke didn't mention that it was for five seconds, when passing through a room because his brother was watching an HBO special.

* * *

Sasuke pulled into the secluded parking lot of the all girl's school, noting how the girls instantly turned after seeing Sasuke's raven-blue hair waving in the gentle breeze; however they instantly turned murderous after seeing Naruto sitting next to him in his car.

"…and you know this is a classic. '65 was a prime damn year, you need to take care of this baby."

"What in the hell are you going on about, still?"

"How much I hate you, how I'd wish you'd get run over by a truck, how gay you truly are, and how fucking stupid your hair looks," Naruto dared.

Blink. Well if that wasn't a first.

"Look you blonde son-of-a-"

"Naru-_chaaan_!" Sakura called obnoxiously from across the parking lot making the two boys turn.

"Smile, dobe." Sasuke reminded.

"Oh I know. Because I can't spell 'slaughter' without 'laughter'. Douche bag."

"Are you fucking threatening me?"

"No, fuck face, I'm just dreaming out loud," Naruto said through a whispered growl as he yanked the car door open and stepped out as his friends fast approached.

Sakura hushed a girlish whisper that held suppressed glee, "Holy _shit_, Naru-chan! You bagged Sasuke-kun."

"Oh how I wish…" Naruto muttered to himself as he pictured Sasuke stuffed after the blonde had hunted the bastard in the wild.

That was the 'bagged' he was wishing for.

Sasuke walked up to Naruto's side and wrapped his hand around the blonde's waist.

This is the 'bagged' he got.

Talk about bullshit.

Sasuke on the other hand couldn't believe how well Naruto was already working for keeping the other girls away, the girls acting like the blonde was some plague, but glaring like 'she' was some type of beast that must be hunted.

Sasuke found it hilarious.

Naruto began with the speech he had already prepared for the girl, "I wanted to apologize for Ka-kun, my brother can be so rude to my friends. He finds it amusing to scare them away."

"Must run in the family…" Ino mused while walking up next to Sakura, sharing her thoughts about Naruto's father.

Naruto flushed while he tried to hopelessly get out of the grasp of the oddly possessive Uchiha, "Sorry about my father too."

Hinata had been standing next to Sakura, "No need to apologize."

"So, Sasuke-kun-" Sakura tried to began.

"We should be heading to our meeting," Hinata interrupted.

The rest of the group stared at the girl who was smiling politely, Naruto giving her a look of thanks and admiration. He'd be getting the hell away from Sasuke.

"Oh yeah, Naru-chan, you can stay if-"

"I'll come!" Naruto quickly interrupted with his eyes wide and frantic.

"It's just a council meeting. Duties and stuff, deciding some things. Are you sure?"

Sakura – President.

Ino – Vice President.

Hinata – Secretary.

Well look who took of the Junior year.

Talk about creepy.

Sakura flicked her eyes back and forth between the couple in front of her.

Something wasn't right.

Sasuke released the blonde, who instantly stumbled once the vice grip had been released, and Naruto suddenly got the first mental smack, as well as physical, of a very personal war.

Sasuke smirked after releasing the blonde, knowing the whole school was watching, and whipped his hand forward with a snap on the blonde's ass causing Naruto to yelp.

The blonde stumbled forward with a squeak, before he turned around at the sound of many giggles and a stinging sensation, holding his buttocks with both hands and a mutinous glare.

"Have fun in school princess. I'll see in you in a few hours."

What a bastard.

Sakura and Ino had already started walking off, pretending they didn't see it for Naruto's sake while Hinata held back to wait for the blonde who was still rubbing his rather sore backside.

Hinata was tugging at Naruto's shirt and teasing the blonde's hair to make sure it fell in the right place, the two walking away from the smirking raven, before the girl began to mumble so only they two could hear.

"You need to be more careful Naruto-kun, or else your wig might fall off."

Naruto snapped his head around, "What did you say?"

* * *

Sasuke stepped out of his car immediately after cutting the engine, reaching back and grabbing his bag to drag along with him.

"You missed council duties. I had to cover for you."

Sasuke – President.

Shikamaru, believe it or not – Vice President.

Odd couple.

"You actually did work?"

"Did I have a choice?"

"You're smart; you could have thought of some clever way to get out of it."

Shikamaru eyed his friend, "What took you so long?"

"Nothing happened."

"Did you molest her?" Shikamaru made sure the teasing was apparent in his voice.

"She nagged me to death about my car and how I was going to burn the clutch, apparently I don't shift right." Sasuke rubbed his right temple with his index finger.

"Uchiha, have you ever driven a car that's stick?" Shikamaru asked him with a bored look mixed with some type of amusement.

"Nope."

"So why did you take the Corvette that's _obviously_ a stick?"

"I wanted too."

"Liar."

Sasuke glared.

Shikamaru stared up at the sky and ignored his best friend.

"Are you going to nag me too?" Sasuke sighed.

"Don't I always?"

"Get to the point." Sasuke huffed.

"I'll figure out a way to get us all home, okay. Let's get to class."

* * *

"So, you never told me how you tracked her down." Shikamaru started as the two exited the school at the end of the day.

Students around them were running to leave, yelling and bellowing out to each other over something of unimportance, while Shikamaru and Sasuke were walking and mumbling towards the parking lot.

"Tsunade."

"That old bitch?" The spiky-boy's face instantly contracted into distaste.

"You still don't like her?"

"Last time I checked, you weren't fond of her either." Shikamaru grumbled.

"True, but she adores me."

"Yeah, she hasn't gotten you suspended eight times."

"Smoker." Sasuke reminded with a tease. The raven wasn't one to enjoy a cigarette.

"Homo."

"Excuse me?" The raven asked with a quirked eyebrow.

"So how did you get Tsunade to give you her address?" Shikamaru had to admit, he was genuinely curious.

"Well, she still adores Itachi, for some unknown reason, so I played the 'I'm his brother' card."

"What did you tell her exactly?"

"That we got off on the wrong foot," A dark smirk grew on Sasuke's face, "and I wanted to make everything right between us. I felt that it was my fault and I needed to apologize."

"Why do you have that look?"

"What look?"

"The 'I just got away with murder' look. You're hiding more than your homosexuality."

Sasuke glared, "Would you drop that!?"

"Speak of your cover story, the girls are here." The boy nodded his head, letting his hair bob lightly in the movement.

Sasuke snapped his head away from his friend, they were just a few feet away from Sasuke's car when Sakura, Ino, Hinata, and Naruto pulled into the parking lot and filed out of their respective cars.

Ino skipped along, her skirt flailing and her hair flapping. Hinata on the other hand, was pale and shaky, taking desperate steps away from Ino's car.

Sakura was smiling broadly, talking loudly to the other three girls just as Naruto was climbing out of the car with a face as though he has just enjoyed a bout of sex.

The blonde was glowing, grinning a sultry grin, and his eyes were half lidded as he stared back.

The raven rolled his eyes.

The blonde was giving Sakura's car one last longing look as the four trotted towards the two boys.

The blonde couldn't exactly explain his feelings towards the car, but if he wasn't posing as a girl, attending an all girl's privet school to win the heart of his secret crush; he'd walk right up to that car and hump it.

Yeah, he'd go there.

Hell, he'd give it a nice love tap on the ass too if it wouldn't earn him a lot of weird looks.

"Remember, Naruto-kun, smile," Hinata reminded him lightly.

The blonde turned away from the car to be faced with Sasuke and his all-to-bored looking friend, and suddenly realized that the smile was more like an ache in his face than anything else.

Forcing a smile is so much more work.

"Hi, Sasuke-kun! Hey, Nara-senpai!" Sakura called even though they were ten feet away from each other.

Ino snorted, "Hey Shi-chan!"

"Damn you woman! Must you in public!?"

Two life long friends growing up next door to each other.

Ino adored it.

Shikamaru _hated_ it.

The raven edged away from Shikamaru knowing exactly what was coming, seeing the attack so many times before having grown up with the two of them, and watched as Ino pounced onto Shikamaru causing the teen to stumble back into the Stingray with a resounding bang.

No dent - luckily.

"Temari-chan said you two were 'getting to know each other'," Ino started, still latched on to the teen.

Shikamaru wiggled his arm helplessly in the vice-like grasp of the younger girl, "Yeah…_And_?"

"No reason. 'Bout time your frigid ass loosened up."

"Why so quiet, dobe?" Sasuke commented after sneaking his way to the blonde's side and snaking his arm onto his shoulder, instantly causing the hair and the back of Naruto's neck  
to rise.

"No reason, teme."

Naruto's blue eyes flicked over to Hinata who was standing quietly by his side watching the spectacle between Ino and Shikamaru.

"Is it because…" Sasuke let his hand coast down Naruto's back in what looked like a soothing manner until his hand landed on the blonde's left ass cheek, and gave it a gentle squeeze making the blonde stifle a yelp.

"What I did this morning?" Sasuke finally finished.

Naruto turned his blazing blue eyes at the raven to snap at him, say something rude and crude before Shikamaru stopped him before he could even open his mouth.

"Uchiha! Grab the woman and let's fucking _go_!"

Poor boy, still trying to shake off Ino from his arm.

Sasuke gave Naruto's waiting left cheek another tap in the direction of the Corvette, leaving the blonde to quickly scramble forward out of reach of the bastards' hand.

This couldn't be happening.

* * *

Kiba pulled his cell phone out of his pocket after hearing the ring tone scream at him, his paces slowing as he made his way home from school; thankful he didn't have to go and pick up Naruto.

He knew something good was going to come out of that homo, pale, weird-haired guy roping Naruto into pretending to be his girlfriend.

Not to mention it was downright humorous.

Kiba stared at the screen on his phone.  
_  
Message_.

It could only be from Naruto.

The teen flipped his phone open, clicking a button to read the message.  
_  
Message from Naruto:_  
'_Find a place…'_

Kiba stopped walking and pulled his face back from the phone.

Sasuke had obviously converted Naruto into being gay, and quicker than Kiba had expected.

His phone started wailing once more, a ring tone yelling at him and the word '_Message'_ flashing on the screen once more.

Kiba clicked the button again.  
_  
Message from Naruto:_  
'_...to bury this fuck's body.'_

The teen laughed, still standing in the middle of the sidewalk two blocks away from his own house. He was mentally debating taking this back to blonde's house and showing it to  
Kakashi for the older man to enjoy, but simply texted him back.

'_Why?_'

Send.

Naruto flipped open his phone after he heard more than felt the phone vibrate and quickly went to his message.  
_  
'I'll have to tell you when I get home.'_

Send.

"Talking to your other boyfriend, Naru-chan?" Shikamaru teased from the driver's seat.

Naruto huffed, "I wish. At least that bastard would be smart enough to drive a bigger car."

Sasuke managed a glare at the back right side of Naruto's head while the blonde was perched in his lap. Naruto's skirt was politely tucked underneath him and his knees were rammed up against the dash in the confining area. The blonde tried to cross his lean tan legs as best he could in the cramped area, but between the limited space, and the ball crunching  
ministrations; he simply left them to stay open a little.

"Fat-ass," Sasuke reminded the blonde again.

Even though the raven was all for taking Naruto home just to annoy the blonde, he wasn't exactly thinking about Naruto having to sit on his lap, because he wasn't technically thinking at all.

Sakura had offered a ride, but no, that wasn't good enough. Sasuke didn't even think about where Naruto was going to be sitting when he told Naruto that Sakura wasn't going to be taking him home, nope, just about how hilarious the dobe looked when he attempted to glare.

So Sasuke had to endure the weight of the blonde as he sat on his lap, occasionally squirming for comfort, which would make the raven snap at him.

The blonde began squirming, shuffling his buttocks as his knees began to cramp for the umpteenth time in such a short car ride.

What the blonde failed to realize was he was grinding his ass right onto Sasuke's crotch.

"Would you _sit still_," Sasuke hissed with a slight warning.

"What's the big damn deal, teme? I'm just trying to get comfortable. We're almost at my house anyway."

Sasuke leaned his head forward, resting his chin on the blonde's shoulder, his lips instantly tickling the shell of the blonde's ear.

"Tell me _dobe_, if something grinded on _you_, what would happen?"

Tick-Tock. One Second.

Tick-Tock. Two Seconds.

Naruto's scream could be heard where Kiba had begun walking again two blocks away, as if his best friend was next to him.

"Ah, that's why we're burying him."

* * *

Author's Note's: My sponsor doesn't listen to much comedy, so last time we went out shopping together, I took my Dane Cook CD. So, it just gave me something to add after I realized I had that CD memorized…poor woman.  
Also: I'm eventually going to put this 'General, Romance' again. I realized I can't be funny all the time and it wouldn't be fair if I kept it as 'Humor' when I can't keep it up to snuff.  
Quick update because I'm starting school Monday, and I don't know when I'm going to be able to fall back into my regular routine of updating again.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight – I Bet You It's Cancer

Author's Notes: This chapter sets up for something that was spurred on by a joke that was tossed back and forth between me and Resuna. So, I hope even though I twisted it around a bit, I did it some type of sick justice (even though it just got started).

Also: Usually I don't do this, but if someone wants to do fanart… art away. People keep _talking_ to me about doing it, but the lack of it makes me wonder if you guys think I don't like it or something. I like it… really, I do.

Disclaimer: I don't own it… blah blah blah… college sucks, stress sucks, people suck.  
I don't own 'Counter Strike' or 'Dead Space'.  
They will _never_ play WoW…_never._

Warning: Seeing as how I might _offend_ some people…  
I warn you… to… shove it up your merry little asses if I offend you.  
With **love**,  
Nevi.

Rating: T – Because this is one of those chapters where I got bored and I just wrote nonsense.

Chapter Eight – I Bet You It's Cancer

(I didn't edit this very much…I didn't have time. I'll come back and do it some time in the next five years.)

* * *

Naruto was screaming.

Naruto was yelling.

Naruto was rolling down the window and trying to crawl out of the car.

Yeah, he was a little beyond freaked out.

"PUT THE FUCKING CAR IN PARK!" Naruto screeched; his voice still girlish and ear shattering.

Shikamaru not wanting to deal with anything too troublesome immediately obeyed and plugged his ears.

"Naruto-" Sasuke dared with a sigh.

"Oh _hell_ no!" Naruto tried to scramble out the open window, but the cramped area and heels proved it to be rather difficult.

"Calm down, dobe," Midnight eyes rolled in annoyance.

Naruto turned carefully around in his seat with a hiss, "You are getting a _boner_. If you don't let me out of this _fucking car_ I will see to it you never fucking manage that again."

Sasuke turned his head at the sound of slow applause to see Shikamaru clapping with a sly grin, "I really like her."

Sasuke glared in the direction of his best friend, and shoved the door open after yanking on the door handle, and shoved the blonde out rather roughly before following.

Naruto stumbled trying to keep his balance and not fall on his face, "Don't you _dare_ come near me."

Sasuke wanted to remind the blonde that he _wasn't_ getting aroused, but he was simply warning the blonde before he did.

Amusement stopped him.

"You're overreacting." Sasuke said calmly.

"The hell I am. YOU WERE GETTING A BONER!" Naruto bellowed.

Sasuke looked at the blonde in disbelief, the idiot obviously not realizing he just yelled those words at the top of his lungs, or that his father was standing on his front steps waiting for him.

Sasuke's day couldn't get any worse, so why the hell not take it and run with it?

"If I rubbed my hand on your crotch, how would your body respond?" Sasuke asked calmly.

"My hand would instinctively cut off my dick for my own sake," Naruto replied quickly.

Sasuke sighed in annoyance, "I wasn't doing it on purpose, dobe. You were grinding on me! What am I supposed to do?"

"SOMETHING!"

"Brilliant comeback," Sasuke clipped.

"I'm so fucking glad I don't have to see your fucking face tomorrow!" Naruto spat.

Sasuke's head quirked a little to the side, "What do you mean?"

"No school, no you."

"Says who?"

"Says me, boner-boy." Naruto spat.

"Boner-boy?" Kiba questioned suddenly from the other side of the rumbling car.

Anyone else? Really, Sasuke couldn't have a more embarrassing situation play out, not that he would admit that it was embarrassing, but if anyone else showed up-

"Hello, Sasuke-kun! Treating my dear Naru-chan well, _very well_ I see." Kakashi chirped from the other side of the car, behind Kiba.

Sasuke was in between killing everyone, and just getting in the car and letting Shikamaru drive them home, but both were so tempting.

"Would you like to-?" Kakashi began

"No!" Naruto interrupted.

"Just for a little-" Kakashi began to pout.

"NO!" Naruto roared a little manlier than he intended causing Shikamaru to lean over in the car to give him a once over.

"Alright then, it was good seeing you Sasuke-kun," Kakashi walked off, sulking at his missed chance at teasing and torturing.

Really, he worked from home, so he needed something to keep his interest peaked.

"_See_ you around, teme," Naruto said bitterly.

"Don't forget the kiss goodbye, Sasuke!" Shikamaru called from inside the car.

Naruto flicked the other teen off before storming off towards his house before he decided punching Sasuke in the face would have been the best course of action.

* * *

"Explain to me again, but with more breathing," Kiba said with an odd face.

Naruto tried to explain the events of the day, from Hinata to Sasuke in one whoosh of breath and in a split second, only to make one continuous sound of humming nonsense.

"Okay," Naruto breathed.

"But first," Kiba interrupted, "Go wash your damn face."

Naruto blinked before reaching his hand up to feel the thin film of powder still on his face.

Well he must look like a jackass.

Naruto had ran, or stumbled really, into his house and changed into _normal_ clothes.

Which meant a pair of _baggy_ jeans, a _baggy_ shirt and a pair of _boxers_.

Boxers which he found a new appreciation for every time he changed into them.

Yet, as soon as Naruto carefully removed his wig, he had simply run over to Kiba's, barefoot and still in make-up.

"Sorry," The blonde muttered.

"Yeah, yeah, drag queen. Less talking, more washing." The brunette threw a hand towel at his best friend's face.

Naruto walked out of the bathroom a few moments later with the damp towel in his hands, the tips of his bangs damp and clinging to his face, "Now can I tell you?"

"Yeah, sure Mrs. Doubtfire," Kiba smirked.

"Where do you want me to begin?"

"Wherever."

"Okay, I want to kill that fucking bastard, Sasuke." Naruto snarled.

Kiba chuckled, "Why?"

"He humiliated me!"

"_Go on_…" Kiba drew out with a grin.

"He smacked my ass in front of the entire school."

Kiba was in between laughing and revulsion. Really, the guy knew Naruto was male, it was playing on that fine line.

"Then later, he squeezed it!" Naruto ranted on.

Oh yeah, that was crossing it. Humiliating him and the whole nine or not.

"Then you heard the rest!"

Kiba cleared his throat, not wanting to have to walk the blonde to and from school everyday all over again, "In his defense-"

Round one…  
FIGHT!

"TRAITOR!" Naruto bellowed.

"Calm down."

"You're siding with that BASTARD!"

"I actually think he's quite charming…" Kakashi chimed in from the doorway causing the two boys to jump.

"What are you doing here?" Naruto turned on his father with a hiss.

"Just listening."

Naruto sighed and Kiba rolled his eyes.

"But seriously Naruto, you were-"

"Considering punching you in the fucking face! How could you side with _him_!" Naruto snarled.

Kiba wanted to tell the blonde that it was just convenient to have someone to escort him, but he decided against it.

"I'm trying to tell you-"

"What, that you're a _douche_?"

"That you were grinding on him. Any sane guy would have a reaction." Kiba's nose wrinkled at the words.

Just. Fucking. Nasty.

"Whatever."

"Anything else?" Kiba sighed before glaring.

Naruto glared back, "Yeah, and this involves Hinata."

Kiba's glare lessened a fraction and his back straightened just barely, "Okay."

Naruto knew that his attention meant, 'What!? What the fuck do you mean!? You better tell me every little fucking detail or I'll beat it the fuck out of you!'  
They were best friends after all and guys were very subtle.

Naruto let out one long sigh, still standing in the middle of Kiba's room while his best friend sat at his computer desk, his computer game paused.

"She knows."

Kiba looked away from his paused game of Counter Strike, turning his head while the pieces fell into place, making that sentence whole.

"She knows you're crossing-dressing as a girl to get into an elite all girls school to hopefully date her best friend?" Kiba dared.

"No, she knows I prefer boxers over briefs asshat. YES!"

"HOW!?"

"So, Naruto-kun, someone else knows your secret?" Kakashi questioned from the doorway.

"Yes, dad."

"My, my, my," Kakashi's index finger and thumb played with his chin as he thought.

"Again…how?" Kiba urged.

"The first time I met her she was suspicious. I slipped on my voice. Then when I fell when _Sasuke_ saw my underwear, she had been coming back from seeing her cousin and saw them too. She knew it was me that day when I dressed down to a guy, she could tell by my eyes, plus she can tell I wear a wig," Naruto tugged on his hair lightly as an example, knowing that poking his eyes wouldn't be very smart.

"Which would most likely mean others can too," Kakashi insisted.

"So now what?" Naruto questioned.

"You invite Hinata-chan over Monday, and when you get home, I'll tell you your _new_ cover story." Kakashi insisted as he disappeared from the doorway.

Naruto sighed in frustration.

Kiba went back to playing Counter Strike.

* * *

"Cancer!?" Naruto yelled.

Kiba's head instantly smacked against the table.

Tangle after tangle after tangle.

He was eventually going to trip and fall on his face.

"Dad, this is way too extreme," Naruto continued.

"This is the only way, Naruto-kun." Kakashi insisted.

"Why can't I have had a really bad bleaching incident?"

"This is how it's is going to go… The reason we moved was because of your cancer," Kakashi began.

"You already told my friends it was because I was a whore."

Kiba began laughing against the table, his back shaking with his shoulders, "No way?"

"Yeah, same day you told them we were shifting through porn sites?" Naruto asked if he remembered.

Kiba's laugh grew louder, "Rough day."

"Now obviously the other girls can tell you are wearing a wig," Kakashi began simply.

"Why do you say that?"

"If one can, more can."

"Wonderful," Naruto muttered, mimicking Kiba's actions with smacking his face against the table.

"Now, we will be telling Hinata-chan about your 'cancer story'," Kakashi quoted with his fingers, "who, in turn will tell Sakura and Ino."

"And…what type of brilliant scheme is this?" Naruto's face screwed up against the table.

"Ino is obviously a chatter box. She'll tell the whole school."

Naruto lifted his head to give his father a disapproving look, "You're _too_ good at this, dad."

Kakashi perked up with a grin, "Why thank you."

"SO," Naruto began as he sat up, his left arm rubbing his shoulder to hopefully relieve the sudden tension.

"I, am Naruto – the girl, who has a brother named Kakashi, who has a _father_ named Naruto Senior. We moved here from…" Naruto dragged out, his hand rolling in the air.

"Alaska," Kakashi replied.

"Alaska? Seriously?" Naruto looked down at his tan complexion, "Do I-"

"We moved here from Alaska…" Kakashi pushed.

Naruto sighed in a _hopefully _calming manner, "Because of my cancer?"

"Because after you lost your hair from the chemotherapy, and your friends shunned you with ruthless teasing."

"Dad, I doubt anyone would be _that_ heartless…" Naruto said with a contorted face.

"SO…We moved here."

"The _whore_ story?" Naruto questioned with a frown.

"I made it up after watching a movie on Lifetime to save you further embarrassment," Kakashi shrugged simply.

Kiba was sitting up now, giving Kakashi an odd look of shock and disgust, "You know, you amaze me sometimes."

* * *

"So, Naruto-chan, why didn't you just come out and say it?" Sakura called through the phone.

The blonde sighed, "I thought you would think…You know…"

"It's not like you're contagious or anything," Sakura soothed.

"It was a serious situation, Sakura-chan," Naruto replied as he looked over at Kiba who sat next to him on the couch, ruthlessly punching away on the Playstaion controller silently  
cursing 'Dead Space' (1).

"You didn't have to hide your cancer, Naru-chan," Sakura chirped.

Naruto's head fell back, his face pointing towards the ceiling.

This really couldn't be fucking happening.

First off – of all things to lie about – cancer had to be the _biggest_ sin.

Secondly, it was Saturday, and he hadn't told a soul.

What. The. Fuck?

Naruto cleared his throat before continuing on, "How did you hear?"

"Ino told me," Sakura replied simply.

"How did she hear?" Naruto asked again, with each frustrating sentence, the baritone notes in his voice began slipping through.

"I'm not sure."

"Sakura, could you do me a favor and try to keep this as quiet as possible, please?" Naruto squeaked out with a wince.

"I'll do my best Naru-chan. I better go," Sakura said as she worried her lip.

"Why?" The blonde asked a little deeper than intended.

"I have to go shut up Ino before she tells the entire world. I'll see you Monday, Naru-chan. Try to take it easy and don't worry about it, go take a nice bubble bath."

Naruto had leaned forward, sticking his head between his knees – which caused Kiba to look away from his game to give him an awkward look – to kiss his ass goodbye.

"See you Monday." Naruto hung up the phone before simply dropping the phone on the floor.

Worst idea in history.

Really. He was going to make the books with this one.

* * *

Sasuke was typing away on his laptop, sitting at his desk, when his cell phone started to dance widely next to him from vibration.

It was probably Itachi.

The raven went back to typing on his laptop after he pulled open a desk drawer, dropped the phone inside, and felt a little more content.

But soon, as in five seconds sooner, annoyance overrode that contentment once the vibration was magnified by the hard wood of the drawer.

"What in the hell…?" Sasuke grumbled; retrieving the phone, pondering what could really be so important.

Sasuke looked at the screen with a scowl.  
_  
Message_

He _hated_ text messages. Weren't phones made for calling? He just didn't understand anymore.  
Sasuke flipped the phone open with a loud and irritated sigh, clicking on a button for the message to pop up to be read.  
_  
Message from Ino:_

Sasuke rolled his eyes before reading on. He needed to punch Shikamaru one more time for giving the blabbering idiot his number as some type of sick joke.

How cruel could one person get?

Sasuke's dark orbs flicked back down to the small screen.  
_  
'Did you know Naru-chan had cancer?'_

The raven went to reply, say 'go to hell' or 'leave me the fuck alone', before the sentence registered in his head.

Time out.

Flag on the play.

Offside.

What?

Sasuke clicked to the next message that she had immediately sent after the first.  
_  
Message from Ino:_  
_  
'Go comfort her. She thinks people won't like her anymore_.'

Sasuke snorted.

Most likely because Ino had the biggest mouth in history and couldn't keep a secret if her life, and everyone's for that matter, depended on it.

But really…Cancer?

What in the _fuck_ was that blonde idiot thinking?

Trying to get brownie points with Sakura most likely.

Sasuke sighed after standing from his chair, grabbing his keys off his desk, and heading towards the front door.

* * *

Kakashi sat on the couch next to Kiba flicking through a magazine.

Kiba sat on the couch flicking off the television in between loud curses.

Naruto stood in the middle of his room, towel low and secure around his tan hips, the tips of his hair lightly stuck to his bronze skin of his neck and forehead. His skin was still damp,  
beads of liquid from the bath still clinging to his skin, highlighting the smallest of places of smooth, tan skin.

So, Sakura had a point.

The bubble bath was soothing…Not that he'd admit it out loud.

Not that he'd admit he just soaked in bubbly water _period_.

Now his father releasing that information to the general public without any known fee was a different story.

The blonde strode over to his dresser, ignoring the feel as a clump of bubbles went down from the top of his back, down his spine, slithering down and leaving a bright sheen of a trail in its wake.

Naruto yanked open the top drawer to retrieve boxers and a pair of warm socks, ignoring the loud thumps that he could suddenly hear echoing all the way from the front door.

"Dad will get it…" Naruto mumbled as he shoved the drawer closed.

Kakashi looked over at the door as the persistent pounding made the wooden barrier rattle from the force, his mouth pulling into the slightest of frowns.

Kiba was still pounding on the buttons of the Playstion controller, mouthing inappropriate words before he decided it would be best if he asked, "Should we answer it? Seems important."

Kakashi looked away from the door, back to his magazine, "Nope. They'll handle it."

Sasuke stood in front of the door, his hand slamming down on the thick barrier, glaring at the lights that shown through the closed blinds.

He wasn't an idiot; he knew they were in there.

But he wasn't an ignorant jerk, and he had some pride; he wasn't going to yell.

The raven ceased from banging his fist on the door, his index finger and thumb pinching the bridge of his nose trying desperately to think.

Sasuke pulled his fingers away and snapped them quickly in the air, as a brilliant idea came to mind.

Kiba was peaking out of the peep hole in the door, "Yeah, he's walking away. Guess he gave up."

Kakashi gave a little snort, "I can bet you that he didn't."

Kiba began walking back to the couch with a smug look on his face, "How much."

"Ten says he finds Naruto."

"Okay."

"Twenty says Naruto's naked."

Kiba shivered, "I doubt that."

"And fifty says that Naru-chan runs outside to kill him – still naked," Kakashi said with a twinkle.

"Fifty?" Kiba hesitated, "Hey, what the hell, that's a pretty precise thing you just predicted," He finished with a shrug.

"Yes it is," Kakashi stuck out his hand with a grin that spread so wide it made his eyes shut.

It was technically good that Kiba couldn't see the all-knowing glint in Kakashi's eyes.

He _was_ Naruto's father.

And Sasuke was _obviously_ a stubborn jackass.

The young brunette grabbed Kakashi's hand and shook it firmly, "Bet."

* * *

Author's Notes

: 1) I got Dead Space for Christmas, and I have to say… Fuck. That. Game. I love it, but GEEZ it gets hard.

**Important**: With posting this, it means I have _NO_ chapters left saved up. That also means I'm leaving this on a cliffy… no extra chapters, and only five lines written for chapter 9. I simply ask that you guys be patient. **Please**. (If you can't catch on…college is scaring me shitless.) College is really difficult because it's so new. SO, the update speed I was giving you before _won't_ happen again until…May. But, I won't quit.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine** – Shut the Blinds Next Time

**Author's Notes**: I used a few of my favorite insults in here. Can you guess which ones?  
As you all _most likely_ remember, I said I would eventually be pulling away from humor. There isn't much in this chapter, and I think this is where I'm going to start easing away…I think.  
(Not wonderfully edited… so excuse it.)

**Also**: Okay. Let's try this…One. More. Time. For those of you who couldn't keep up, _I'm not_ stopping the fiction till May - that would be called a _**hiatus**_. I'm slowing my updates. For those of you who are more concerned about this fiction than _my feelings_ and _education_ I suggest you fuck off. I'm in _no mood_ for anymore selfish bullshit.

**Warnings**: I warn you to fuck off if I offend you, especially when it comes to my other Author's Note at the end of the page.

**Disclaimer**: I don't own anything really. Aside a temper and a lot of homework.

**Rating**: T? Yeah, sure.

**Chapter Nine** – Shut the Blinds Next Time

"If it's true that out species is alone in the universe, then I'd have to say that universe aimed rather low and settled for very little."  
-George Carlin

* * *

Sasuke walked around the side of the house, the grass crunching underneath his sneakers and his sunglasses blocking out the ever persisting sun that rebounded off the house.

This was his 'brilliant scheme'.

The brilliant scheme from one of the so-called smartest kids, in one of the highest rank privet schools in the world.

Find the idiot's room.

Brilliant. Really, sheer genius, really putting those brain cells to some tough work.

The raven didn't know why in the world he was doing this aside the fact he wanted to smack the blonde moron upside the head a few times, and harass him more than necessary, but most of all to make sure he cleared up the biggest bullshit lie of them all.

No, not being a male.

That would ruin on his fun.

Having cancer. Because that was just playing with the line a little too much.

Sasuke looked in the next window with a sigh of almost disgust, feeling like some type of peeping tom feeling creeping over him before he noticed the room was pitch black, and he moved on to the next one. If he counted correctly with his memory of the inside of the dobe's house, the next window should be Naruto's room.

He was only checking every other window just to be sure.

Not because he wasn't sure.

He was a Uchiha, and Uchiha's were fucking perfection.

Naruto on the other hand grabbed a fresh pair of bright orange boxers from his dresser drawer with a sigh, the white and gray socks already in hand. The blonde retreated to his bed that was next to his window, not underneath, and tucked securely away in the corner to give him as much room as it possibly could.

Naruto dropped his socks and boxers on his bed with a sigh, stretching his arms over his head, before dropping his arms back down and grabbing at the towel that was still wrapped around his waist.

Of course, Naruto's mind still being wrapped up in other matters at hand, the blonde didn't think about the key thing wrong in the entire situation as he stripped himself of his towel and simply let the damp article drop to the floor.

The blinds were still open.

Sasuke walked up on the next window, positive it was the blonde's room, before he pressed his face up against the glass while his hands were cupped around his eyes shielding out the light.

As soon as Sasuke's eyes adjusted to the light, the raven felt his lips part as he took in a quick intake of breath realizing he was staring at Naruto in all his naked glory.  
Naruto, in all his naked glory who had just realized Sasuke was looking through the glass window.

Sure, Naruto had flicked his eyes at the slight noise on his window thinking it had been a poor bug that met his unsightly doom.

But seeing Sasuke staring through his window, while _still_ naked and attempting to get dressed, it then occurred to Naruto the wrong part in that sentence.

He was naked with Sasuke staring at him.

"Oh…" Naruto's eyes grew wide in shock.

"My…" Sasuke could swear his nose was going to bleed at any second.

Kiba and Kakashi's heads snapped in the direction of down the hall at the sound of a loud curse, and another loud curse that was muffled, and a scream that was closely followed by a loud crash.

So Kiba being a genuinely caring friend, and a forgetful one at that, slowly stood and headed towards the blonde's room with Kakashi's twinkling eyes following him.  
Kiba quickened his pace at the sound of more cursing before he reached Naruto's door and ripped the door opened and didn't even hesitated to knock.

A few things happened.

Kiba collapsed screaming something about being blind.

Naruto screamed louder, still cupping the towel around his crotch.

Sasuke ducked from the windows view were he and Naruto had been yelling at each other through the glass pane.

Naruto fumbled to wrap the towel back around his waist as he quickly went to throw open the window, leaning halfway out to yell at the raven who was leaning with his back against the house and dragging his hand down his face.

"You _PERVERT!_" Naruto screeched again with out the glass muffling his voice.

But Sasuke was already gone.

The blonde growled as he gripped at the loosely tied towel, throwing himself back into his room before he took off towards the front door; hurdling Kiba who was clawing at his eyelids about the burning sensation.  
The blonde sprinted down the hall and into the living room where his father still sat on the couch with an amused look playing on his face while his son angrily fought with the lock before he ripped the front door open, and once again kicked the glass door.

Yeah, he was _really_ pissed.

Yeah, was so pissed he didn't bother getting dressed.

By the look of things, Kiba owed Kakashi some money.

Naruto stomped across the lawn towards the bastard's car, where said bastard was calmly trying to get in.

"What in the _fuck_ do you think you're doing!?" Naruto roared.

Sasuke snapped his eyes up from the lock that seemed to jam at the most inappropriate time.

Sure, Naruto was yelling and causing a scene, it didn't take a scientist to notice that was what that blonde idiot did.

But was his mind playing tricks on him?

Was he really in a _towel_ in his _front yard_?

"Shouldn't you be asking yourself that?" Sasuke couldn't help but ask as his eyes flicked up and down the blonde to add emphasis.

Naruto followed Sasuke's midnight eyes, his jaw tightening from thinking the teen was flirting with him in a teasing way – again.

So Sasuke inclined his head, crossing his arms over his chest to wait for the blonde to catch on.

A draft.

A chill.

Shrinkage?  
_  
Anything?_

The sound and sight of the neighbor's across the street pointing and laughing immediately caused the blonde to look down, and made him squawk.  
Naruto tried to wrap his arms around himself only to have the towel inch itself down his hips, which caused the blonde to panic and grab at the handle of Sasuke's car.

"Open the doors!" Naruto screeched in a panicked voice.

"You know, science can learn a lot from someone this stupid." The raven smirked as the blonde tugged harder still.

"Just _open the door_!"

"Go in your house!"

"Are you _insane?_!"

Sasuke raised a delicate eyebrow and drew out an answer, "Clearly."

"Come _on_."

"The locks are jammed."

It was true. But in a technicality, now that the raven wasn't the one panicking, he could technically push the button on his key chain, and most likely the doors would unlock easily.

But first to the point.

"Why won't you go back into the house?"

"And face my dad and Kiba?" Naruto growled as the neighbors were whispering to each other from across the street.

Sasuke's eyes flicked to the still opened front door before back to the pleading large blue eyes of the blonde, back to the front door, and back to the half-naked blonde.  
This was going to be the last time he did something stupid.

Especially for a male.

Who was _Half. Naked._

The raven pressed his thumb against the little button that signaled the car to undo the locks, and repressed a relieved sigh when the audible click was heard and watched as Naruto almost ripped the door opened the door to practically dive in.

The raven pressed his index finger and thumb to his eyes before he opened the driver side door and _gently_ and _calmly_ got in.

Kakashi approached Kiba with a smirk.

The teen was still wreathing around on the floor.

"Kiba-kun…?" Kakashi crouched down to the teen's level with an amused look.

The boy was muttering, "I saw…him naked. Please take my sight. Burn my memory…dear someone burn that fucking image out of my mind."

Kakashi chuckled, not hesitating to get to the point, "You owe me eighty dollars."

That instantly brought that sanity back to Kiba, making him sit upright.

"What!?"

"He found Naruto, which would be ten."

Kiba nodded slowly.

"Naruto was naked, which would be twenty."

Kiba felt his stomach churn and his eyes water.

"And he went after him outside, which would be fifty."

Kiba let out a long sigh. He couldn't argue. The entire time he was on the ground trying to remove his eyes from his head, so he wasn't quite sure what had happened after entering Naruto's room.

"Alright, we'll go to the bank tomorrow."

Kakashi smiled.

He wasn't going to tell Kiba that on a technicality, Naruto didn't go outside naked because he was in a towel. How much fun would _that_ be?

"By the way…"

Kakashi pulled himself out of his mental musing and put his attention back on the teen, one eyebrow raised to show he was listening.

"Where _is_ Naruto?"

* * *

Sasuke drove down the street with his features constantly twisting.

He had a _guy_, _half naked_ in a _towel_ in his car.

The raven lightly shook his head. He was usually the one to _avoid_ such things, steer clear and keep away, but it was pretty much a fact that he was the one that perused Naruto.

He just wanted to have someone keep the fan girls away, annoy and pester.

He just never figured _this_ would happen.

I mean really, who would?

"If we get pulled over, just play dead or something…" Sasuke muttered.

Naruto huffed as he crossed his arms over his bare chest, "What's the big deal?"

The raven turned at the corner, shaking his head the more he drove; he couldn't believe he was _really_ doing this. Seriously. Who the hell drives around with some guy in a towel? You either look like a kidnapper or a hormone driven freak.

"Dobe, you're _in a towel_. With _nothing_ underneath. Police have a tendency to frown on that."

Naruto couldn't help but blush. Naruto then, for some reason, couldn't help but remember who was peeking through his window.

"Oh, yeah, by the way…"

Sasuke turned down another street heading for his neighborhood praying silently that his brother wasn't home. It would be a field day.

"What possessed you to look through my window?"

Sasuke clenched his teeth, already irritated that this went farther than he wanted.

Not to mention he had been caught staring at a _guy_ through a _window_.

What in the hell was going on with him?

"Most likely the same thing that possessed you to tell everyone you have _cancer._"

"How did _you_ hear about that?"

"The same way everyone else did."

"Ino." They both said in sad unison as Sasuke smoothly pulled into the long driveway.

Sasuke swiftly opened the car door after cutting the engine, getting ready to make his leave from his car and quickly into his house like he always did before the blonde stopped him.

"Where the fuck are you going?"

Sasuke turned his head back to look at him, not bothering to put his leg back inside and shut the door, "Inside."

"And leave me in here!?"

"If you want to stay. Sure. Do what you want."

Naruto scrambled and grabbed at his arm, "I'm in a towel!"

"You don't say? Get out of the car and I can remedy that."

The blonde instantly snapped his hands back, "Oh geez, gross."

Sasuke rolled his midnight eyes with an irritated noise. "No, dobe. I'll get you some clothes! But if you keep this up, I'll leave you on the fucking corner without the towel and telling the neighborhood to go point and laugh."

Sasuke finally climbed out of the car and snapped the door shut, an irritated Naruto quickly following after him, who just so happened to get out of the car in record time with towel still around him protectively.

"You know teme, if you were a superhero your powers would consist of being a douche and pissing me off."

"And my kryptonite is idiot blonde's. Stay back," The raven replied in slow sarcasm as he unlocked the front door to allow the glaring blonde to enter first.

Sasuke followed the blonde in, only to almost smack into said blonde before he barked at him, "Anytime today!"

"Is when I would be getting an explanation, right Otouto?"

Sasuke looked at his older brother's impassive face, which could only mean one simple thing.

Sasuke was in for a world of torment.

* * *

Author's Notes: I ended it there _simply_ because I felt like it, not because it's leading up to something big. Not to mention I'm irritated because I've been doing ice capades on my front fucking steps. Damn winter storm.  
**Also**: I'm putting this in all my fictions (it's already been in ALLTF). If you're reviewing, actually _review_. They're there for actual feedback not 'update soon' or 'I liked it'. I really could care less if this cuts down on my reviews, because I want you people to say something in your reviews. As a writer, I want to hear something. Write about what you like or dislike, how much you _hate_ all my grammar and spelling mistakes… _something_. And if I pissed you off, oh-fucking-well. I warn you all the time, don't I?


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10 – A Trip With The Fall

Author's Notes: I would have had this out sooner had I not been busy with life. You know, that thing I have to deal with from time to time. Guh, bullshit.

Disclaimer: I own Sasuke. Yeah! What!? I said it! Is it true!? Fuck no.

Warnings: I still haven't taken poor Naru out of his towel. How horrible am I? Guy has been in that thing for how long now? Geez. But that might warn you for what's to come.

Rating: K+ - T because I think it works out just fine.

Chapter 10 – A Trip With The Fall

"I don't have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman who would be mad at me for saying that."  
- Mitch Hedburg

* * *

"You know Sasuke, I do enjoy meeting your friends, but it isn't everyday you bring them home in the nude."

Naruto gripped at the towel around his waist as his whole body flared with a blush. Not only was the man in front of him obscenely beautiful, but his sarcasm was identical to Sasuke's.

"Your father is really young…" Naruto muttered.

Sasuke swiftly reached up and smacked the blonde upside the head.

Said blonde turned his head while rubbing his blonde locks, "What!?"

"Firstly, he is _not_ my father. _Secondly_, you tell a soul I'm related to him and I'll. Kill. You."

"Well now Otouto, that's not very polite."

"Well now Aniki, this is none of your business."

Naruto's eyes flickered back and forth between the two brothers with a questionable look.

"He's your _brother_?" Naruto looked down at himself in the towel and swiftly moved behind Sasuke for cover.

The age difference couldn't be that much, and apparently it seemed anyone in relation to Sasuke might want to stare at him in the nude.

"Yes, I'm Itachi, and you are…"

"_None…of…your…business…_" Sasuke growled out.

Itachi noticed it was possessively.

The two boys just dismissed it as Sasuke being a temperamental bastard.

Well, only Naruto.

If Itachi found out that Naruto was some guy that crossed dressed as a girl that Sasuke blackmailed into pretending to be his girlfriend; it would be the end of his ego as he knew it.

Naruto poked his head out from behind Sasuke, a light smile on his face at the polite man, and how he seemed to irritate Sasuke.

Hell if he stared at him in a towel, Sasuke hated him, and thus Naruto adored him.

Plus the younger raven's body blocked all eye ravishing.

"I'm Naruto, his girlfriend."

Itachi paused for a second, his breath hitching as he was caught from saying something when Naruto had boldly stated how he knew Sasuke.

"Otouto…anything to add?" Itachi smirked as he rocked back and forth on the balls of his feet.

Naruto grinned as he ducked his head back behind the now seething raven and waited for any type of response while only one quick second ticked quickly by.

"And by that you mean?"

"Why he's half naked?"

"Coincidence."

"Why _he's_ saying _he's_ your _girlfriend_?"

"Delusional." Sasuke growled out.

"From…" Itachi rolled his hand in the air in an expecting way.

"Being cold and blonde! Anymore questions!?"

Naruto stepped back from the snappy and most likely murderous raven, before said raven turned with a fierce glare aimed at the blonde.

"Move it." Sasuke pointed to one side of the grand stair case.

Itachi gave Naruto a polite nod as he trudged forward, "It's been…amusing meeting you Naruto-kun."

The blonde could hear Sasuke storming up the steps behind him as he swore under his breath about 'murder' and 'make the damn blonde into a red-head'.

Said soon-to-be-murdered blonde stopped at the top of the stair case to almost have the raven walk into him again.

"What in the _fuck_ are you doing, dobe!?"

Naruto shrank back just barely, solely on the fact of the close proximity and constantly being reminded by an unwanted and unknown draft that he was still half-naked.

"I don't know where the _hell_ I'm going, teme." The blonde reminded him.

Sasuke huffed, as if the blonde should somehow know better, and turned right down the hallway. Naruto stumbled a little to try and keep up with Sasuke's long and fast strides, and  
not to mention he had finally took the time to gawk a little.

Naruto looked up at what had to be expensive works of art that perfectly adorned the wide and spacious hallway walls, not cluttered them. A few random antique pieces of furniture would be place in between doorways, and occasionally on top of a perfectly placed half-table, would be what looked like a priceless trinket of something or another.

"Stop gawking! Once you're clothed, you can wonder and look all you want." Sasuke shot from an open doorway at the end of the hall.

Naruto ripped his eyes away from what looked like the family photos all clustered in one small space on the wall and continued towards the still seething raven.

The blonde fallowed the retreating teen who had disappeared in the doorway, still holding up his towel, and almost dropped it at the sight he was met with.

"This is your _room_?" Naruto's eyes bugged.

Sasuke set his keys on his desk top and turned to glare, "Yes, dobe."

"Don't feed me that tone," Naruto shot, "What, are you parent's mob bosses or something? Are they off on a big hit?"

Sasuke gave Naruto a long look of pained sympathy before he could finally find words. "Are you serious?"

"Maybe."

"I hope you aren't that dumb."

"I hope you aren't that gay."

"Says the half naked guy who jumped in my car," Sasuke shot.

"Says…says…says the fag who looked through my window!" Naruto finally shot back, but Sasuke had already crossed the large room, and was in his walk-in closet, and out of ear-shot.

Mostly.

"Did you say something a dobe would say; dobe?" The raven called from the closet.

"Shove it, teme!"

Sasuke strode out of the closet with an arm full of clothes, "Come on dip-shit."

"Come on, what?" Naruto questioned angrily.

Sasuke held back any sexual joke that came to mind. Sure he loved messing with the blonde and driving him up the wall, but when he was standing in front of him half naked, it just put a new definition to awkward. Sasuke did mentally note to have a conversation with Naruto later about how the blonde needed to learn how to talk though.

Maybe an elite privet school was good for him.

"Come over here idiot. Or do you want to stay in a towel? I'm sure my brother would love that."

Naruto made a horrified noise, "What?"

"He pitches for the other team. Isn't it obvious? Long girly hair, girly face, painted nails… all the signs are there, but then again, you are blonde."

The color drained from Naruto's tan face, leaving him to be as pale as Sasuke.

"You're joking."

"You're not his type."

"He has a type?"

Sasuke snorted, "Most people do. But you're too short for him."

The raven took a few strides toward the randomly horrified blonde, most likely imagining that his older brother would have molested him.

"Here's my pants." The raven handed over a pair of draw-string loose fitting black cotton pajama pants.

"I don't want your pants."

"Do you want to stay naked? Just get in them and don't argue."

"Why _in the fuck_ would I want to get in your pants?" Naruto pulled back a few steps with a look of disgust.

Sasuke didn't know whether to laugh or roll his eyes, "A pair of boxers which I'd rather you burn than give back to me and a shirt. Actually… burn all of it instead of giving it back to me."

Naruto glared before he snatched the clothes away with one hand, "I get it."

Naruto gave Sasuke a foul look, while Sasuke gave Naruto an expectant one.

"You don't expect me to change here?"

"In front of me? Hardly. The bathroom is down the hall on your left. Get moving; you already have goose bumps."

Naruto wasn't going to deny that he was cold. He was beyond it. If he wasn't afraid of the bastard in front of him never letting him live it down, he'd let his teeth freely chatter, but he had enough events in less than an hour to supply torture.

"You can't leave?" Naruto eyed the small heater next to the desk.

"Hn. Not only are you stupid, but delusional. Some people think that's cute."

The blonde wrinkled his nose in a disgusting matter, "You don't, do you?"

"Am I moving?"

"Are you always this rude?"

"It varies depending on the amount of stupidity surrounding me."

Naruto sighed and then locked his legs stubbornly, "I'm not moving."

Sasuke's eyes shrunk into a fixed glare, "Like hell. I gave you clothes so go get in them."

The raven stepped forward, his hand wrapping around the upper arm of the blonde with more force than he really intended, and then pulled much harder than he ever really expected too.

Sasuke blamed it on annoyance.

Naruto blamed it on Sasuke being a bastard.

Naruto really had no time to react to the 'attack' as the bastard 'attacker' moved at the speed of light.

The blonde had no time to unlock his legs.

With the sudden tugging motion and the legs locked in place, Naruto easily stumbled forward into Sasuke, who in turn stumbled backwards and tried to move out of the way.  
The blonde's legs easily unlocked after this, his legs easily getting tangled with Sasuke's as they stumbled to regain their balance.

Naruto being Naruto, he continued to stumble as the raven successfully moved out of harms way and balanced back to what was considered normal for a Uchiha, and pulled the raven right along with him.

Naruto getting turned around in the quick process, as Sasuke still had a firm grip on his arm, continued to fall. The blonde screwed his eyes tight and simply waited for the impact of his head on the hardwood floor.

Naruto winced as his buttocks collided with the floor, and then his back, but never his head just as the wind got knocked out of him.  
The blonde registered something warm and weighted against his entire body, and something warm wrapped in his hair against the back of his head.

Naruto's eyelids fluttered open to be met with a midnight gaze an inch away from his face.  
Naruto let his mind not-so-calmly (technically it was screaming) put all the pieces together.

The warm and weighted 'object' would be Sasuke's body, and the warm thing laced within his hair, Naruto would bet it was Sasuke's hand.  
If the blonde didn't loathe him so much, he'd thank him for saving his head from a brutal beating.

But he loathed him.

The raven's breath ghosted against the tan face of the blonde, making Naruto realize that they had both been holding their breath up until that point.  
Naruto blamed it on the randomness of the fall.

Technically Naruto started holding his breath _again_ since Sasuke knocked it out of him.

"Well, well, well," Itachi's voice called from the doorway, "touching and all, but Naruto-kun…you dropped your towel."

* * *

Author's Notes: Seeing as how only _some_ of you read my other works, you weren't really…familiar with my cliff hangers. Again, last chapter wasn't really a cliff hanger. _This_ is more my style. Stopping where my readers want to kill me. Some of you know it well from me, others don't. Get used to it. It's my favorite thing ever.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11** – Around and Around Just to Get Caught

**Author's Note**: I wanted to add this little note here. No. No, no, no, no, no. NO ItaNaru. This is a normal question (not like 'Is Naru-chan going to be wearing lady's underwear?') because Itachi is…Itachi, and I can see where that question springs from. I am not a fan in any sense. Itachi is there for the torturing/humorous purposes that I see fit. Molesting little blonde boys isn't one of them. Sorry for the disappointment, or perhaps your welcome for the breather.

**Warnings**: Hmm? I'm thinking I'm seeing the romance in the distance, a close distance as well. I'm warning you _all_ I'm keeping my promise of labeling as 'General/Romance' in chapters to come.

**Disclaimer**: So…when I said I owned Sasuke, nothing happened. I even did a little dance outside in the snow… and nothing. Apparently what you can do for rain doesn't work for raven haired beauties.

**Chapter 11** – Around and Around Just to Get Caught

* * *

So here Sasuke was, lying on top of a guest in his house. Not only a guest, but a male guest. Now not only was it a male guest, but he was a once half-naked, now a fully nude guest.

Now not only was Sasuke lying on top of a naked male guest in his house, but they were in his room, on his floor. _Not only_ was Sasuke lying on top of a naked male guest in his house, in his room on the floor, but said male guest was cross-dressing and pretending to be his girlfriend on the weekdays during school.

Not enough for you?

Not only was Sasuke lying on top of a nude guy in his house in his room that was his cross-dressing girlfriend, but this guy had no ride home unless it was Sasuke.  
Because Itachi wouldn't devoid him of that pleasure.

So let's tune in to watch. Shall we?

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Naruto slammed his eyes shut, because after he heard Itachi utter those words, an awkward draft hit his sides at that very moment. Not _all_ of him, which he _might_ have preferred, just the sides, which meant Sasuke was still on top of him.

Dear holy fuck.

Sasuke was torn between the most awkward moment of his young teenage life, or the first murder of his young teenage life; Itachi still standing in the doorway smirking and all.

"Get out!" Sasuke snapped.

Naruto opened his eyes then, remembering that Sasuke was on top of him – naked.

"Get off!"

"Oh yes, dear Naruto-kun, 'get off' indeed." Itachi mocked from the doorway.

"Itachi, so fucking help me, I will _kill_ you!"

"Teme! So help _me_, I'll _kill you_!" Naruto roared.

"Out!" Sasuke bellowed.

"Off!" Naruto snapped.

"Itachi!"

"Damn you, Uchiha!" Naruto would have reached up to punch the younger raven, if he wasn't paralyzed from embarrassment.

Itachi snickered from the doorway, finally peeling himself away, "Around and around you go, wherever you stop…well, it will at least be funny for _me_."

Sasuke launched himself up, not sparing Naruto one glance as he hurtled himself towards his brother.

Naruto instantly reached his hands up, protectively covering himself from possibly peeping eyes before he tried to even bother thinking about his towel.

His sweet, loving, caring, _all covering_ towel.

The blonde heard a loud smack, and then a few tumbling thuds; if his mind was working he would have known Sasuke just tackled his brother to the ground with intent to kill.

Of course, all the blonde knew was Sasuke was _out_ of the room and _off_ of his naked body.

Naruto sat up quickly, grabbing some piece of clothing Sasuke had handed him and covered his one area he cherished. The blonde scrambled up from the floor, flashing his ass for  
anyone to see, turned before _someone_ could see and ran for the door.

Sasuke perked up just as he heard his door slam shut, having heard the sound too many times, and hearing the tiny sound of the little lock clicking into place.

The youngest Uchiha looked down at his older brother who had been tackled underneath him by the use of surprise only, who was now chuckling.

"_What_ was _that_ about?"

Itachi let out a bark of mocking laughter, "I'd like to ask you the same thing, little brother."

Sasuke stood up with an exasperated sigh, throwing his answer over his shoulder while he walked back towards his room.

"I just caught him! I didn't strip him!"

Itachi wiped away tears of mirth as he practically dragged his shaking body down the stairs, wondering if he should even bother with standing when he was laughing so hard.

Sasuke approached his door, and knocked with a feeling the blonde wouldn't answer, for all he knew he jumped out the window naked.

To his surprise, the blonde answered, exactly as he would have expected.

"_Calm_ down you fucking queer loving molester!"

Sasuke sighed with an eye roll; waiting rather impatiently before Naruto opened the door looking more burnt than tan.

Sasuke could hear Itachi's cackling in the distance, most likely waiting for the awkward exchange and waiting in anticipation.

The young raven sighed, not even bothering to embarrass the blonde anymore, and spared him the question.

"Let's go, I'm taking you home."

Sasuke could swear he heard his brother stomp his foot in frustration before shuffling off into the other room.

* * *

"So, my little Naru-chan…How was your date with Sasuke-kun?" Kakashi questioned as soon as Naruto practically kicked the front door in.

The blonde turned towards his father and best friend on the couch, his mind flicking from murder to, well, murder.

"It…_Wasn't_…A….Date."

"It was just the two of you," Kakashi reasoned to his son, who was shaking with rage.

"_Wasn't…_A…Date." Naruto knew if he took another step, he'd lunge with an intent to kill.

"You left so quickly…Almost eager?"

"_Wasn't_…Date…" Naruto took a step back.

"But Naruto, you were still in your towel…So I figured-"

"Dad," Naruto raised his hand, "I refuse to hear your perverted logic as to why _me_ being in a towel links it to being a date."

The grayed man shrugged, looking back down to his magazine with a flick of the page.

"It is good to know you swing both ways, Naruto-kun."

The blonde locked his jaw at the sentence, "Excuse. Me?"

Kakashi didn't flinch, "Well you did disappear with your _boyfriend_ in only _a towel_ and you came home in his clothes."

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

"Kiba…you're suppose to _move_ when I run towards my dad with that look in my eyes." Naruto frowned towards his best friend. His best friend who now sported a large red spot on his face.

It took all of Kiba to drag his best friend to his room after he landed a punch on his brunette head instead of his father's. It reminded Kiba, yet again, to never sit in the middle of the pair – ever.

Kiba shrugged though, and rubbed the back of his head, looking at the wall to his left.

The blonde furrowed his brow in question, "What?"

Kiba shook his head.

"What is it?"

Kiba looked at the ceiling, shaking his head yet again.

"Just tell me."

Again, the shake of the head and another wall catching his attention.

"Then why won't you look at me?"

Kiba shrugged.

"Or talk to me." Naruto noted with a scowl.

Kiba's lips moved, a low mumble barely reaching Naruto's ears.

"What?"

"You crossed." Kiba mumbled, a flush covering his face.

"Crossed, what?"

"YOU CROSSED TO THE GAY SIDE, DUDE!" Kiba roared, unnecessarily.

What Naruto didn't know, was the entire time the blonde was gone with Sasuke, Kakashi was convincing Kiba that Naruto was quickly becoming gay.

Naruto blinked, taking a step back, lacing his voice with sarcasm, "Oh, yeah, totally. I jumped into Darth Fag's arms and begged him to take me."

"Oh. EW! See! I fucking knew it!" Kiba pointed an accusing finger.

An accusing finger that was grabbed suddenly, and given a faulty groping.

Kiba pulled his hand back with the most disgusting face he could muster before Naruto took a daring step forward.

"You know _Kiba_, I never noticed, but you have a pretty face."

With that, Kiba left the house screaming, and Naruto fell to the floor laughing.

* * *

Sasuke pondered in front of the door.

Pondered only because it sounded better than hesitated.

It was Monday, and that meant he needed to pick up Naruto.

Naruto, the guy whom he had landed on while he was naked, and then drove him home while he was burning red and in embarrassed silence.

Now they had to act like a couple.

Sasuke might rather face the fangirls.

He cringed. T

hat was a downright _lie._ He'd avoid those horrid creatures till his dying day if it was possible. If that meant dragging Naruto out of his house, cussing, screaming, and  
calling Sasuke gay; so be it.

He would deal with it.

Because Naruto was the only fangirl repellant he could stand yet, and the blonde was still grinding on his nerves.

The raven raised a pale hand up and knocked gently, smirking when he saw Kiba approach warily.

Assumptions could be amusing sometimes.

The raven smirked as the brunette approached while he waited for Kakashi to answer the door, the other boy standing farther away than usual, and looking away.

"So…" Kiba started.

"Hn."

"Did you, you know, molest him? Or was he willing?"

Sasuke turned to stare at the teen just as the door swung open, and Kakashi stood instead of Naruto.

Kiba just walked in, and Sasuke just stared after him.

Did he _hear_ him right?

"Good morning, Sasuke-kun."

Sasuke nodded in response, not surprised the man was there instead of Naruto.

"I'm afraid Naruto won't be joining you today…"

The raven expected this, "What? Lost a limb?"

"Caught a cold."

"Hn." The raven wasn't buying it.

"Sasuke-kun…he _was_ in a towel for quiet some time." Kakashi reminded, shedding light on the reality of the situation.

Sasuke paused for one second, "Prove it."

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Naruto was laying on the couch, a pile of blankets covering his body, and a pillow tucked under his head.

Oops.

"So, did the fever go down or what? I'm tired of going to the store for stupid shit, Kakashi." Kiba called as he hovered in the doorway.

Kakashi found it necessary to send Kiba on unnecessary errands to the store for pointless and useful things while using the excuse of having to stay with Naruto.

"Still high Kiba. The cold just hit him last night."

Naruto grumbled from the couch, "Yeah, in the face."

Sasuke chuckled, "So…you caught a cold, dobe?"

"Tell me something teme. How can you catch something when you weren't chasing it?"

The raven snorted, "It was chasing you."

The blonde nodded with a burning cough, "You would know."

Sasuke sighed just as Naruto let out a line of sneezes and a long groan.

"I'm going to skip school."

The blonde called from the couch with his stuffy nose, "Oh dear class President!"

"I'm going to skip school and take care of you, dobe."

* * *

Author's Notes: This month has left me in a crabby mood… so I'm working to get out of it. Also, everyone is wondering who is going to fall for _who_ first, and I'm getting there. Promise.  
ALLTF is _delayed_. Bittersweet is on _Hiatus_. Broken is _fun_. Ahh…writing.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12** – Aspirin Causes Headaches

**Author's Note**: I'm back from Hiatus. Somewhat. I'm trying. It was fun under my rock!

**Warnings**: Sexual jokes. Why? Because everyone apparently loves Kakashi.

**Disclaimer**: Nothing, I own nothing.

**Rating**: K+?

**Chapter 12** – Aspirin Causes Headaches

"One day we'll look back at this moment, laugh nervously, then change the subject." – I don't know who said it.

* * *

"I can't fucking believe you." Naruto grumbled.

"I'm thinking along those lines myself." Sasuke muttered.

Naruto's eyes shrank into slits as he glared at Sasuke's hand inching towards himself, "Keep. Away."

"_Take them_."

"How do I know it's not some date rape drug?"

Sasuke threw his head back in exasperation, wondering why the gods were punishing him so. Then he realized, he had sighed up for this fucked-up day.

"Dobe, please, help me prove you aren't that stereotypical dumb blonde and just take the damn aspirin."

Naruto crossed his arms defiantly over his chest. Under that blankets, where Sasuke's eyes couldn't see.

Sasuke's pale hand inched closer, two pills glinting, and Naruto still not trusting. Then Naruto's saving grace came at the sound of a ringing phone.

"Telephone, telephone, _telephone_!"

Sasuke rolled his eyes with an exasperated sigh, "You're taking these when I get back."

The raven stalked out of the room, slamming the aspirin on the small table on the way out, and crushing them without a care and without notice.

Naruto flashed a smile as soon as he inched the blanket up over his mouth, listening to Sasuke stomp away and into another room before he could hear his muffled voice.

Sure, Naruto was sick. Sure, Naruto felt like hell. And sure, Naruto hadn't been sick in three years. If Sasuke was going to be here, to ruin his _one_ sick day he was going to get from school, then Naruto Uzumaki was going to ruin his.

Was Naruto embarrassed by what happened the other day? You bet your ass. Was he going to make sure the permanent-bad-hair-day Uchiha was going to forget it? Fuck no.

Sasuke stalked back in the room, the entire bottle of aspirin in his hand and contemplating if he should just shove it down Naruto's throat and hope for the best. Well, best in his eyes.  
Then sighed at the damnable, horrible, not-thinking-it-through, promise he had made with the caller.

Fucking Kakashi.

"Did my dad call me?"

Sasuke snorted, "He called you all sorts of things; stupid, ugly, annoying-"

Naruto rolled his eyes; "You need to upgrade your trash talk."

"And you just need to upgrade."

The blonde's jaw dropped without thinking, "I _really_ hate you, do you know that?"

"Look at that! I hate you too! Our first thing in common, now take the fucking aspirin."

"No."

"Yes."

"_No_."

"Look, dobe." Sasuke said as he clutched the bottle, wondering if it was such a bad idea to just kill him.

"Your dad just called-"

"So he _did_ just call me…"

"And he wanted _me_ to tell you to listen to me."

Naruto snorted, "Yeah right. How much cough medicine did you chug while you were in the kitchen? That must be one fucked up dream world you're in teme, because there is no way."

That did it. For some reason, it did it. It might have been the sheer fact that Sasuke was just looking for a reason. That was it. Not even two minutes after promising Kakashi that he would 'take care' of his son, he was starting a fight.

The raven flung the bottle of aspirin, clearly not thinking, but reaching his limit within three short hours. Naruto on the other hand, wasn't expecting a plastic bottle to come flying at his face at full force.

The stinging sensation was what brought the reality of it all to Naruto, and before he knew it, he was throwing the blankets off of him, and jumping off the couch.

* * *

Kakashi was humming to himself, leisurely strolling up the walkway with his hands clutching bags full of random things.

It had been a wonderful day. Best in years, he thought. He saw Sasuke as a saving grace. Kakashi could go out, do some errands, random shopping, and be sure someone was there to answer the phone and take care of Naruto.

The older man reached the door, grabbing at the door handle and making his way inside to the eerie quiet that met his ears before he realized that he might have just possibly made a horrible mistake. Kakashi quickly walked into the living room, looking towards the couch to check for Naruto as his eyes raked over the scene of his precious room.

The coffee table was tipped on its side, the things that used to be on top were scattered randomly about on the floor. Aspirin pills were in awkward places. The loveseat that usually sat against another wall had been moved – completely – and tipped over. The usual side table was across the room as it had been used as a projectile. The television was miraculously sitting perfectly in place, still playing on the random station that Kakashi had left it on.

The older man stared towards the couch where he had left his son, and wondered if he should laugh, or yell.

Naruto sat at one end of the couch, a large red mark on his forehead and jaw. His left leg was bouncing up and down in agitation, and his face was set in a scowl, not even acknowledging the presence of his father because he didn't notice. Sasuke was at the opposite end, glaring at some unknown spot. The sleeve of his shirt had been torn, and a bright red mark screamed from underneath his left eye in mock.

Kakashi weighed his options for a quick second.

Yell, and punish his son and beat his son's friend, or terrorize them in some small form that would mentally scar.

Kakashi grinned quickly.

"Naruto-kun…Sasuke-kun…"

The two turned, one looking petrified, and the other looking as if he had been freed.

"So…" Kakashi started, "I have to say, for a first time, you were messier than I was."

Naruto's brow instantly furrowed, and Sasuke dropped his head back, knowing what he had meant.

"I still remember my first time. Pretty little thing, and the two of us had a great time. Scared the hell out of your grandmother when she found out we hadn't been fighting like two boys should be when you make that noise." Kakashi winked as he walked into the room, glancing down as he turned a pill to dust with a miscalculated step.

Naruto and Sasuke wore matching looks, in between gawking and disgust before Naruto began, "Whoa, dad. Wrong idea! We didn't have-" Naruto gagged a little, "We got in a fist fight."

Kakashi gave the blonde a disapproving look, "Naruto, my dear boy. At least use a better excuse, and one I didn't just give you."

"Are you serious?" Sasuke muttered, still looking as if he was going to simply jump through the wall and make a run for it.

Kakashi flashed a smile then, "Well Sasuke, since your family now, I hope you'll join us for dinner."

"No."

"I insist"

"Nope."

Naruto started breathing a little easier at the thought of Sasuke wanting to stay just as much as Naruto wanted him too.

Kakashi opened his mouth again, just in time for knocking to come lightly from the front door, followed by the doorbell.

The two boys dared to glance at each other, before back to Kakashi, all three of them shrugging.

The grayed man smirked, "Well, maybe the sounds of your love making brought guests?"

Sasuke swore he threw up a little in his mouth, and Naruto swore he was going to fall over and die any minute.

It took Kakashi all of three long strides to get to the door, smiling a little at knowing what he caused, and laughing on the inside at the thought of making someone else clean up the mess.

Naruto turned to Sasuke, "Run. For crying out fucking loud, run."

"Please, do not say that sentence."

The blonde thought, "What, run?"

"No, dobe. What your dad is claiming what I made you do."

The tan face instantly turned a nasty sickly shade mixed with a flush, and before he could open his mouth to say something to defend whatever it is that he was defending, Kakashi stopped it.

"Naru-_chaaan_!" The older man called, "Your friends from school are here."

The blonde's head turned so fast, his head spun lightly. With the sudden situation, Naruto didn't even know what to say back.

"Naruto just wants to change Kakashi, we'll be right back. Tell them all to come right in!" Sasuke called, yanking the blonde up and pulling him quickly down the hallway.

"What in the fuck do you think you're doing, teme?" Naruto hissed while still being dragged along.

"Something you should learn about girls, dobe. They are overly persistent beasts when it comes to one of their own being down." Sasuke stopped at the end of the hallway, swinging Naruto in front of him and waiting for the blonde to open his door.

"Then maybe you should just leave." Naruto stated, "It would be easier."

The two turned their heads at the sound of girls chatting politely, their voices growing, and Naruto instantly opened his door and dragged Sasuke in with him.

"What in the fuck do I do?"

Sasuke looked him over quickly, raising a delicate eyebrow at his shirt that still covered his upper-half. How had he missed that? Then again, the only time he had seen Naruto uncovered by blankets was when he was attempting to knock him out.

Naruto looked down and flushed, "What!? It's comfortable. Change! I need to change!"

The raven sighed, "As much as I think you need to _take a bath_, you should leave my shirt on."

Naruto turned around from his dresser, his wild flinging of boxers and bras making Sasuke wonder oddly if the blonde would ever need therapy.

"_Why_...?"  
Sasuke sighed, staring at the bright white and orange pants, "In relationships, girls tend to wear the guys clothes, especially when they're sick. Something about comfort."

Naruto looked down again, tugging on the loose shirt and then flicking his eyes up at Sasuke, "And the effect adds on because you're here."

"If they wouldn't have seen my car, I would have left."

"Hey, Sasuke?"

The raven paused at the sound of his name instead of 'teme'.

"Uhh, I think we made a little mistake." Naruto held up a bra and grabbed his wig, rushing around the raven.

Sasuke was about to agree, that dragging himself in on Naruto's freaky little circus show to get to a girl was indeed a mistake before Naruto corrected him.

"Aren't boyfriend's _not_ supposed to be in their girlfriend's room with the door closed?" Naruto grabbed a pair of pink drawstring pants that Kakashi insisted on for sleepovers. Naruto called them suicide missions.

Sasuke cursed under his breath, sliding his hand over his face in an exhausting manner before his eyes finally opened to see Naruto looking at him in an uncomfortable manner.

"What, dobe?"

"I need to change." Naruto grumbled, a cough itching at the back of his throat.

Sasuke sighed, "Need I remind you-"

"That you've seen me naked more than your fair share." Naruto paused to cough, "I get it, but could you humor me and turn the fuck around?"

Sasuke rolled his eyes, "You know, even though I don't know how in the hell you do it there, I would love to know how you managed it at public school."

Naruto let out a quick relieved sigh as Sasuke turned around and quickly yanked off his pants, "What do you mean?"

"Gym class."

The blonde stumbled and fell while trying to manage to put on his pink pants, causing Sasuke to look over his shoulder with a questionable look.

"If you're lightheaded still, you should have at least sat on the bed." Sasuke turned completely around, offering the blonde his hand and pretending he wasn't still in his boxers.

The blonde ignored the pale hand, or really, his mind was in a different world than where the helpful gesture was.

"Dobe!" Sasuke waved Naruto back to the present, "What's wrong? Do I need to call for your father?"

Naruto visibly paled at the thought of his father rushing into his room, he on the floor in his boxers with Sasuke hovering over him.

"No!" Naruto sat up abruptly, head butting Sasuke in the mouth who tumbled backward and leaned against the wall rubbing his now sore lip.

"Shit! Sorry!" Naruto jumped up, ignoring the raven and putting on the pink pants quickly.

"What in the _fuck_ was that!?" Sasuke snapped.

The blonde sneezed as he yanked his arms out of the shit, leaving the garment to hang loosely around his neck. "You just made me realize something, that's all. Sorry, really."

Naruto walked forward, grabbing the cups to fill his bra off the dresser and turn rigidly to Sasuke and extend his arms, "Hold these."

The raven grabbed the rubber fillers as they dropped from the tan hands of the quickly moving and wobbling blonde.

"You know dobe, you amaze me." Sasuke held them awkwardly, "You go from being traumatized to giving me your breasts."

The blonde stuttered out a laugh which morphed into a cough as he strapped on his most comfortable bra, which in all actuality, wasn't comfortable at all.

"I figured if I gave you something fun to play with you'll be nicer," Naruto joked.

Sasuke threw the left breast at Naruto's head, making the male laugh again, his voice cracking in odd places from his voice going horse.

Naruto bent down to retrieve his awkward piece before stiffening back up and closing his eyes at the spinning.

Naruto tan hand slipped the cup in place, and Sasuke couldn't help but look away at the most awkward thing he'd ever been in the presence of. The raven just held out the right cup, waiting before Naruto relieved him of it, snickering and moving on.

Sasuke figured that he was making some type of a face, or else Naruto wouldn't have made a peep.

"Alright, let's do this." Naruto clutched his hands into fists in a determined fashion, Sasuke looking away from a random spot on the wall to find the short locks had grown.

"You should play this up."

"Why?" Naruto cocked his head slightly, his voice already higher.

"Because weren't you the genius that said couples don't go into rooms together with shut doors?" Sasuke walked to Naruto's bed and yanked off the plainest and cleanest blanket before handing it off. "We'll pretend I was helping you."

"What's this for?" A tan hand reached forward and took the item peacefully, his voice regular once again.

"Wrap it around yourself and work your acting skills."

The blonde swung it in the air and let it fall on his wig topped head, drape his shoulders, and pool to the floor before he securely wrapped it around himself.

Naruto shook his head lightly, making the room tilt, "You know, teme, under different circumstances, you aren't that bad."

The raven sighed, "If I didn't just hold your tits in my hands dobe, I might have agreed with you."

The blonde chuckled and then grimaced, "Well," Naruto blew out a large breath of air.

Sasuke looked at him, "What? Go to the woman of your desires as another woman."

Azure eyes fixed in a glare, "No, teme. It's…man this is so awkward to say…"

Midnight eyes scrutinized the teen in front of him before deciding to push, "Just spit it out."

Naruto took a deep breath in and out, "I need you to act like my actual boyfriend, teme. Not some pompous jerk. So please, for ten minutes, try not to be a prick, and then I'll give you an excuse to go. Everything can be back to normal when I go back to school, I swear."

Sasuke looked over at Naruto from the wall he was staring at, looked at his face and consequentially looked into his pleading eyes.

No one, no matter how angry, spiteful, vengeful, rude, or anything of the sorts, could turn Naruto away with a look like that sparkling in his perfect blue eyes.

The pale teen cursed under his breath, his left hand coming up to run through his raven-black hair in a rare habit.

"You owe me, Naruto."

The blonde flashed a bright smile, going to rush forward to drag the raven out of the room before stumbling over the blanket. Sasuke, in a moment of quick reflex, put his hands out while the blonde fell forward towards him, and sighed after he caught him.

"And dobe, please, don't recreate any horrible memories that we have so we can share them with your father."

Naruto chuckled away the embarrassment, "Wouldn't dream of it, teme."

Sasuke sighed as he pulled his hands away from Naruto's shoulders, waiting while the blonde situated the blanket around him once more. This time off the ground a good inch.  
The two walked to Naruto's bedroom door.

Sasuke right hand reached for the door handle, while his left arm wrapped around the slender shoulders of the now perfectly wheezing blonde, who leaned against his body for supposed support.

The two of them spared each other a glace before Sasuke pulled the door open and took Naruto with him.

* * *

Author's Notes: I think I have them moving along better, and I have things set up for next chapter.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13 – Feelings Grow with Silence

Author's Notes: Apparently, I'm a horribly shitty person to be around when I'm not writing. –sigh- _So_, even though I wasn't updating, I was writing. The pressure was easier to deal with.  
And look at me updating, eh? I just have to be careful not to run out of chapters again.

Warnings: This chapter is longer than I wanted (nothing like…ALLTF). It couldn't be helped. And a sweet little kiss.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything.

Rating: K+ as in it's enriched with vitamins? No? I tried.

Chapter 13 – Feelings Grow with Silence

* * *

Naruto held his breath as Sasuke tugged him out into the hallway, then he realized he was supposed be pretending to be wheezing. The raven watched his steps, walking slowly and carefully as he would with a dying person.

"Alright, dobe."

The blonde nodded lightly as to not make the blanket drag off his wig, and leaned perfectly and very uncomfortably against Sasuke as the two walked down the hallway.

"Oh, Naru-chan!" Sakura instantly called upon seeing the two emerged completely.

The blonde's eyes flicked up from staring at the ground, the pink haired girl having jumped up to throw him a sympathetic look.

Ino was right behind her, the two of them walking quickly down the hall.

Sasuke shuttered, which instantly made Naruto chuckle mutely and whisper under his breath, "Queer."

"I will push you down." The raven threatened quickly just as the two girls finally came forward.

"Oh Naru-chan, you poor thing!" Sakura breathed as if she would break him.

Naruto let out a false cough, covering his mouth politely, making his throat itch to cough again for real, and then sneeze.

Hinata appeared between the other two girls, handing off a small packet of tissues, and a loose one before smiling politely.

"Excuse me girls. Let me get her to the couch so she can sit down," Sasuke said politely.

The two girls scurried off quickly, leaving Hinata to move with the two, pretending to help to carry along Naruto.

"Naruto-kun…" She began lightly, quieter that she usually was, but Sasuke heard.

Sasuke snapped his head to the side, looking down at the two who were looking at each other, sharing a light smile and a motherly disapproving look.

When in the _fuck_ did _that_ happen?

"You didn't put on any make-up…" Her eyes showed her worry.

The blonde coughed quickly, covering and uncovering his mouth. "Don't all girls not wear make-up when they're sick? I mean, no offence, but aren't they supposed to look all funny and gross?"

Sasuke hung his head, as if he was walking Naruto his last mile because really, why would you insult girls to a girl?

"Dobe, if you start a sentence with 'no offence', don't you think it's going to offend _someone_?"

Hinata giggled while Naruto shot Sasuke a look, "That's why I said _no _offence."

"It's no time to argue." The polite girl added gently.

"Yeah, by the way, when were you going to tell me more people knew?" Sasuke whispered harshly.

"It's none of your damn business who knows!" Naruto whispered back, causing Hinata to look on worriedly.

"Um, Sasuke-kun, what happened to your lip?" Ino asked politely as the group entered the still battered living room.

Naruto felt Sasuke stiffen, and the blonde gritted his teeth as the raven gripped his shoulder more than necessary.

"I slipped and fell," Sasuke began, puncturing the perfect picture the girls had of him, "Naru-chan was dizzy and I broke her fall instead of the floor."

Naruto rolled his blue eyes discreetly as the girls 'awed' and praised him for his sweet hearted gesture. The girls just had no idea how close to the truth that was not too long ago.

Sakura moved out of the way as Sasuke directed Naruto to the couch, the 'couple' sitting gently, and Sakura sitting on the blonde's free side, Ino sitting quickly next to her pink haired friend.

Hinata and Kakashi stood as the smaller couch was still flipped over in dismay.

"Naru-chan, what happened to you living room?" Sakura dared as she patted the top of the blanket that was wrapped over the blonde wig on Naruto's head.

"A police raid." Kakashi stated simply.

"A what?" Sasuke, Naruto, and Hinata asked in unison, in complete and utter shock.

Could the man get anymore eccentric? Could he create anymore over the top awkwardness and insanity? Not to mention embarrassment to cover a lifetime.

Could he?

Always.

Kakashi waved off the horrified expressions Sakura and Ino were shooting the grayed man.

Naruto dared to glance at Sasuke, who was looking back at him with a look that clearly spelled out 'what-in-the-fuck-is-wrong-with-him?'.

Naruto shrugged ever so slightly as to not rub his shoulder against Sakura's before the two looked back towards Kakashi for the inevitable excuse.

"You see, working from home can be hard work…"

Naruto's head dropped, he had an even worse feeling than before.

"But, sadly, computers can be sadistic contraptions. I was doing some work from home when I accidentally hacked through an unknown firewall-"

Sasuke pinched the inside of Naruto's arm, causing the blonde to take in a sharp breath, causing him to suddenly go into a fit of coughs.

"Oh! Naru-chan! Do you need something?" Sakura's hand began tapping on Naruto's bouncing back as he struggled to get back to regular breathing.

Hinata gave Sasuke the slightest look; her eyes darting to Naruto and back to him hinting that he should follow Sakura's lead with better grace of a loving boyfriend.

Damn it all.

Sasuke's hand rested on the top of Naruto's back, a few light pats of comfort before his hand snaked up and down in a soothing manner, always stopping halfway down before running back up.

"What do you need princess?" Sasuke asked gently.

Naruto had to hold back a hiss, whether it was from that damnable nickname or from the gentle tone that was just as fake as its sincerity; he just went for both.

Naruto suddenly felt the need to turn to Sasuke and jam his nose far up into his brain but he rationalized it _might_ cause a scene.

"A drink would be nice…" Naruto wheezed out sweetly with a half of a smile.

Sasuke's eyes flicked to Hinata who started moving discreetly enough in his peripheral vision that he caught sight, and the other two hovering girls didn't.

Hinata, Sasuke realized, was his saving grace. He, in no way, shape, or form, knew how to act like a proper boyfriend. This was unexplored territory. This was downright evil and uncharted territory.

Hinata made small movements, pointing to her forehead, then to Naruto's, quickly pointing to her lips, and then back to Naruto's forehead.

Sasuke's head jerked to the side in realization, before he ground out the question, "What…Kind…Would…You…Like…?"

Hinata nodded quickly in a small rapid movement, her eyes a little wider, her mouth finally moving silently for Sasuke to read.  
_  
"They doubt you two…_"

"Juice…" Naruto wheezed out perfectly through coughs.

Sasuke could easily admit, to himself, alone in a quiet empty room, in his head, that Naruto was attractive. Any person, male or female could see that. But this, Sasuke would admit,  
was pushing him to his limit. Naruto was attractive, but the blonde was downright _annoying_ and fucking crazy.

Now, because Sasuke had to get ballsy, here he was stuck _kissing_ him?

Joking around with it to freak him out was _hilarious_, but this was different. This was just downright awkward.

Sasuke didn't let the sigh become audible as he swallowed every ounce of pride he had left before he leaned over and pressed his lips onto Naruto's forehead as sweetly as he possibly could.

Naruto froze on the spot as soon as he realized what exactly was happening, the blonde silently counting the three seconds before Sasuke's lips were detached from his forehead.

Naruto ignored the small little ball of excitement that awoke in his stomach, passing it off as awkward anxiety instead.  
_  
Not_ because Sasuke just kissed his forehead.  
_  
Nope_.

"You need to take something…your fever is insane." Sasuke whispered as he pulled back, his lips brushing Naruto's forehead.

The blonde swallowed, not realizing Sasuke would step up like _that_ in the small ten minutes of pretending to be a nice boyfriend.

"Sasuke-kun…It might just be because she's flushed." Hinata continued.

The raven looked back to the horrified blonde with the most sympathetic look mixed with a look of doom.

The raven lifted his right hand up, lightly pressing the back side of it to the left side of Naruto's flamed face before switching it to the right side. Sasuke's hand lifted and gently touched the side of his neck just as he felt Naruto swallow thickly and then Sasuke's hand traveled under Naruto's shirt to press against his upper chest.

The raven ignored the tiny little butterfly that was fluttering around in his stomach at the situation at hand.

Sasuke was _not_ happy about this.  
_  
Nope_.

"Yeah," Sasuke said removing his hand, and following through with the 'tender boyfriend' routine, "She has a fever."

The raven's hand kept touching the thin tan neck of the blonde before reaching up and cupping a flushed cheek, "Naru-chan, I'm going to go get you some aspirin from the store. Do  
you need anything else?"

Naruto shook his head lightly swallowing again, Sasuke's mint-laced breath tickling his face, and his midnight gaze laced with murder.

Naruto was technically shaking his head towards the lively butterflies in his stomach that refused to simmer down while Sasuke stared at him.

Sasuke leaned over and placed a tender kiss on Naruto's heated cheek before standing, smiling as tenderly towards Naruto as he could manage before walking to the kitchen. Kakashi  
sat there on a stool flicking through yet another magazine with a mischievous smile.

"Who would have thought you would be so tender to my Naru-chan, Sa-kun?"

Sasuke slammed the glass he had retrieved down so hard on the counter it shattered out of his grasp, and without even hesitating, he reached up and retrieved another one.

"Okay…" Kakashi began, shutting his magazine, "Why are you doing this Sasuke-kun?"

"Doing. What?" The raven ground out.

"Doing something that you obviously don't want to do."

"Who said I didn't want to do it?" Sasuke bit.

Kakashi's eyes twinkled, "Well that's just wonderful, wanting to spend so much time with my Naru-chan."

Sasuke sighed, opening the refrigerator and grabbing the juice he had given to the blonde earlier, before filling the glass and returning it.

The raven picked up the glass off the counter, ignoring the pair of eyes following him throughout the entire ministration before Kakashi finally started speaking again.

"You know Sasuke-kun, if Naruto _didn't_ want to do this, he would have found another way to talk to Sakura. Obviously there is something he likes about you."

Sasuke again had to fill up another glass after breaking the filled one on the wall over Kakashi's head.

* * *

Kakashi walked into the living room just as the three girls were saying their goodbye's, the older man deciding it was fine to let them leave instead of pushing their mental stability.

He'd eventually see them again.

The grown man waved politely as the girls quickly ducked out the door at the sight of him, and shut the door in their wake.

Kakashi walked back into the living room with a smile, his son pulling his wig off with a sigh of relief.

"How are you feeling, son?" Kakashi asked tenderly after flipping the smaller couch back to its proper position.

It was inevitable that he was going to end up cleaning.

He needed a maid.

"Fine. I don't know what scared Sasuke off more, you or them." Naruto chuckled as he made a move to get up.

"It's quite amazing, the two of you." Kakashi started, eyeing his carpet that was still littered with aspirin.

"What about it?" The blonde paused, wrapping the blanket tighter around his body at the sudden chill.

"Your situation, it's quite something. Remarkable, really."

Naruto shrugged, "Just two guys trying to get what they want."

"Which is?"

"The girl, and – well, not the girl." Naruto chuckled.

Kakashi nodded slowly before rubbing his chin in a thinking manner, "I thought as much."

"You thought as much, what?"

"Sasuke's not trying to get the girl, but he got you? Well, it just shows there is obviously something he likes about you."

The blonde snorted, "Dad, I've had more guys check me out as a female in a day than females gave me a single look in my life. Of course there is something."

Kakashi shook his grayed head, "No, no, no, Naruto-kun. Sasuke-kun could always find someone else to do this for him, he does have money. So obviously there must be something he _has to_ like about you."

Kakashi bent down to pick up the small broken table just as Naruto threw his half filled glass of juice at his father's head, only to have it to hit the wall and shatter.

* * *

Sasuke sat outside Naruto's house, in his car, the bag of juice and aspirin abandoned in the passenger seat.

He wasn't sure when he was going to drag himself out of the car, but he figured someone would notice him and say something.

He'd been sitting there for a long time. He was guessing somewhere over twenty minutes, and the store wasn't that far outside of Naruto's neighborhood.

He wasn't even sure why he was thinking over it so much, really. Usually, being a Uchiha would grace his pride and mind, and push the issue aside without another passing thought.

He'd go right back to how he was when he first made the deal.

Not caring.

Here he was, wondering.

That was a small form in some awkward way of caring.

Hell, he had _skipped_ school to take care of the idiot, forced him to take aspirin, got him a drink, and went as far as to go to the store for more.

He could deny till his dying day that wasn't caring, but it was.

He could deny that taking Naruto to his house was just some form of not wanting the dobe to bug him. Hell, he'd take perverted accusations over a caring gesture.

But when the blonde was horrified about going back in the house, and he took him to his, it qualified as a caring gesture.

When he gave Naruto the benefit of the doubt, and called him by his name, it was a _nice_ gesture.

When it boiled down to it, he just didn't understand why Naruto was _still_ going along with whatever the hell they were doing.

The raven sighed as loud as he would allow himself in his own car which he swore Itachi had laced with spy equipment.

He couldn't figure out what it was.

These _feelings_.

The word 'feeling' in the same thought process as Naruto alone scared Sasuke.

But despite the utter turmoil his mind was in with racing thoughts and crazed emotions, he composed himself.

He mentally gave Kakashi the benefit of the doubt.

He might just be on to something.

What a prick.

* * *

Naruto was laying on his bed, his arm slung over his eyes, and his forehead and cheek feeling like they were going to burn off.

Not to mention he was cursing his bad aim at the moment.

The blonde already heard Sasuke return, curse Kakashi into the next millennium, and then quickly leave.

Naruto didn't expect _any_ different, he just wanted to know why it took him so long to get out of his car.

He heard the bastard sit outside for the longest time before he actually got out of his car, but Naruto figured with his narcissistic personality, he was kissing his own ass in the mirror.

The blonde rolled his eyes behind eyelids at the thought; he wasn't very narcissistic when you got down to it.

The blonde shook his head, his face rubbing against his arm.

He was!

He was a narcissistic, diabolical, teme.

Naruto let a sigh escape his lips, cursing silently before sitting up; letting his arms fall limply on the large comforter that was covering his legs.

Okay.

So, maybe, just maybe, Sasuke wasn't all _that_ bad.

But, Naruto had some type of feeling that he really hadn't even begin to get to even see the good part of Sasuke verse the bad part.

Really.

Taking advantage of what Naruto was doing – bad.

Willing to stay despite the mess – good.

Dirty comments to get under his skin – annoying.

Catching him when he fell, despite the nudeness – sweet.

Not acting like a good boyfriend – headache.

Acting like the perfect boyfriend…

Naruto swallowed thickly before shaking his head, blowing at his face to make his bangs flutter out of his face.

Naruto could give the bastard the benefit of the doubt; he could be a pretty good guy.

But the blonde couldn't find one iota of _real_ interest Sasuke held for him in their entire situation, or why.

The blonde was a convenience, and he could understand that now.

Or why Sasuke was following along with Naruto's insane scheme that seemed to get worse day by day.

Convenience or not, it just seemed too insane to willingly go along with.

Naruto on the other hand couldn't deny these…; he put his left hand on his stomach and his right on his forehead.

Feelings.

He knew one thing for certain.

And that was that his father and his 'in your head' tactics were better than ever.

What a douche.

* * *

Author's Notes: Reviews welcomed. Reviews that say something - loved.  
Reviews on other fictions – appreciated.  
Voting in the poll – Because I want you too.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14 – The Definition of Bullshit

**Author's Notes**: I had this written SO differently for a month or two. (I've been trying to stay ahead again.) For some reason, I came back and re-wrote most of it, and I love it _a lot_ more than before. –twirls- I loved it so much, and I've been in such a good mood, I decided to update early.

**IMPORTANT**: As _promised_, I've changed it from 'Humor' or 'General' because we all know I can't be that funny all the time. So, I'm telling you now that it's not going to be _that_ funny from now on and it would be advised to leave if you just want humor. Besides… this chapter isn't that funny…

Warning: Nothing really. It's one of those filler chapters that I like to do, bridging the gap. **The **_**next**_** chapter** is where you people want to tune in.

Disclaimer: I own, nothing.

Rating: K+ for foul language and a small side of cute with a dash of bitch.

Chapter 14 – The Definition of Bullshit

* * *

Naruto shuffled into English class, taking his seat next to Sakura with a sigh.

His return to school wasn't as glorious as he anticipated.

Sasuke hadn't shown up to pick him up, and all too quickly falling into some type of sick routine, he impatiently waited for his ride to school to show up. So, with ten minutes left to spare, the blonde grabbed his bag with a quick goodbye and took off running towards the school.

Running in heels was defiantly a new experience compared to just walking in them. Naruto swore he sprained his ankles a good ten times.

"Naru-chan, what's wrong? Why are you all out of breath?" Sakura asked politely.

"Ran." Naruto squeaked through a breath.

"What about Sasuke-kun?" Sakura asked as she began to pat down Naruto's hair sweetly.

Naruto shrugged, "I don't know."

"Are you two fighting?"

The blonde spared a quick glance just as the door flew open, and his English teacher walked in, a stick of some unknown food poking impolitely out of her mouth.  
Sakura turned forward in her seat just as Naruto straightened up while Anko's sharp eyes flew over the class.

"Alright…" The teacher began, hopping up on the desk and crossing her legs causing her black skirt to flutter, "I want someone to tell me what love is."

Naruto let his head limply fall and hit the desk causing to Sakura to sharply turn to look, ignoring the few girls who daringly raised their hands.

"Alright, in the back!" Anko never really bothered with names, "Give it your best shot."

The girl let her hand fall, instantly regretting her bold decision, "A...feeling?"

Anko paused her relentless chewing on the innocent stick to spare the girl a pitiful look, "That's it? Have you ever seen love? Have you ever experienced it, or just thought you did because what you were taught what it was? How _can_ you feel it? Do you reach out and touch it? Pet it like your dog?"

The other girls who had their hands eagerly in the air dropped them like Naruto dropped his head.

"Anyone else?"

Sakura boldly raised her hand in a shy way, "An emotion?"

"Is that a question or an answer?"

"Answer?"

Anko sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose, "What kind of an emotion?"

Sakura paused, her hand inching its way down, "I...Uh…"

Naruto sighed, cursing silently at the disillusioned girls that wore their naive hearts on their sleeves. The blonde raised his head from the desk, rolling his eyes at the horrid topic once more before continuing on.

Did he _really_ have to talk about love, sitting next to the girl of his dreams, while cross-dressing trying to get her? He felt like he wanted to be shot.  
Naruto raised his hand without bothering to wait for Anko to call on him.

"Love is a feeling of extreme emotion aimed towards someone you care deeply for whether it be a companion, a family member or a close friend."

"Great definition. So, how do you express love, Barbie?"

Barbie? Did she just really…?

Naruto pulled his face back, as if it were obvious, "The same way you were to express any other emotion. Through actions and, or words."

Anko nodded lightly with a smile, "Well then," the teacher slid off her desk, "Express, in _words_, what love is to you to the best of your ability."

Naruto silently thank his father for the first time in a long time for the random books his father kept that weren't erotica, because he knew how this was going to play out.

Naruto shrugged, "I can't."

Anko gave the thought-to-be girl a skeptical girl a look, "Explain."

"There is no explaining. You _can't_. Well, _I_ can't. How do you expect a room full of people who've never experienced such a thing to explain it? Sam Keen was once quoted as saying "We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly". For my experience, that's as close as it gets."(1)

Because really, Kakashi was far from perfect, but Naruto loved the bastard like any son should love their crazy father.

Naruto didn't notice the immediate silence while he silently mused over his father's antics.

The blonde turned to glance at Sakura, waiting for the wild beating of his heart that he usually got when he got a look at the beautiful girl.

But…something suddenly wasn't right when he glanced at her seemingly perfect face.

Naruto then noticed the room had been in a still and stunned silence. The silence and stillness of the room caused Naruto to look around suddenly in question, his penciled brow furrowing in confusion.

"Well…" Anko cleared her throat causing the girls to snap out of it, "In case you haven't guessed it, we'll be writing the new paper with the basis of an emotion of your choice, and an event or events surrounding it."

Sakura's head turned just as Naruto's head dropped against the desk once again, only to have himself pick it back up and repeat the action over and over till the end of class.

Naruto was going to write it on _hatred_.

* * *

Naruto and Sakura sat outside of the school, sitting down on the short brick lining that wound its way around the bushes in front of the school. Sakura had a compact mirror sitting in her hand, slipping on a new coat of lip gloss while Naruto's eyes watched the front doors awaiting Ino and Hinata.

"So, Naru-chan…" Sakura began, still fixing her appearance in the small mirror.

"Hm?"

"I had no idea you felt so strongly for Sasuke-kun." Sakura snapped her mirror shut causing Naruto to turn his head quickly.

"You're kidding me, right?"

"You heard yourself, right? Everyone else did." Sakura asked, turning to Naruto with an unbelieving look.

"Yes, I did. What does…Oh! _No_! Geez, Sakura you have the _wrong_ idea. Everyone in class does."

How do you explain that you were quoting some love quote with the idea of your father in mind, without sounding weird?

You can't.

At all.

Naruto cursed himself at the thought, because he already knew he was more mature than most girls in the school, and he could grasp the simple concept of love and family and the vast world of.

And in the vast world of Kakashi, the quote really did help him appreciate him father when he plotted his death.

Sakura rolled her emerald eyes, "Don't deny it, Naru-chan. It's just shocking how quickly you picked up on feeling that way about him."

Naruto felt the overwhelming sensation in his face to pull up into a grimace fighting with the impassive mask of being the girlfriend. If Sakura hadn't started looking over her nails, she would have guessed he started having some type of stroke.

"Sakura-chan, I…" Naruto felt like choking on the ugly word, "_like_ him, I don't love him."

"Well, you might want to play catch up with the other girls around school then."

Naruto blinked, his voice squeaking awkwardly, "I don't quite follow."

Sakura hopped down off the brick wall, dusting her skirt off politely, "Naru-chan, other girls have been falling for Sasuke longer. They have just happened to fall short where he caught you."

Naruto ignored that.

He didn't want to think about Sasuke catching him.

"I thought they just 'liked' him because he was good looking and rich."

"I'm not _that_ shallow, Naruto!" Sakura snapped.

"Wait, what?"

She sighed as if in annoyance, "I thought it was pretty obvious, I just didn't want to be so open when you two were together. I've had a crush on him since I first moved here in sixth grade." (2)

Naruto swallowed, suddenly feeling knee high to a grass hopper.

"And he's the exception when it comes to Academia guys?"

Sakura rubbed the back of her neck, "Look, I know you're dating him and all, but, in all honesty, he was kinda'…_the only_ exception."

Naruto let his eyes shut slowly, "And _other_ guys?"

The blonde knew the answer that was coming; he pretty much knew the answer when the jealous tone formed on her tongue.

"In all honesty, Naru-chan, I don't _notice_ any other guys aside Sasuke-kun."

"What do you mean?"

"Naruto…"

* * *

Sasuke was outside Naruto's house, sitting on the steps with his sunglasses covering his eyes, and sighing for the umpteenth time.

He felt bad for ditching Naruto.

He'd admit it. In his head, alone in a room, in a whisper.

So here he was, after the long drawn out walk from home, waiting for Naruto to get home from school with his clique of friends.

Sasuke was thankful he was a senior for once in his short little high school career, because the days where he ended early instead of started late now seemed _just barely_ a little sweeter.

Because really, who didn't like to sleep in?  
And now, here he was, sitting on the front steps of his fake girlfriend's house that he _might_ just have real feelings for.

Talk about non-Uchiha.

The raven looked up just as he saw a big suburban approach, the car halted in the middle of the road instead of pulling up to the curb, and Sasuke just figured it was because the girls were still freaked out by Kakashi.

Who wouldn't be?

The man practically walked around with a neon signs flashing over his head that screamed:

'_FEAR ME!'_

'DON'T FEED THE PSCYOPATH!'  
  
And last, but the most important…

'_HIGHLY DANGEROUS WHEN BORED!_'

Sasuke watched the back door open slowly instead of swinging open widely in the charismatic way Naruto did things; and that's when he had a feeling something happened. Maybe Naruto was still sick, or maybe he got in his first cat fight, or maybe – just perhaps – he saw Sasuke and got totally pissed off.

The blonde hopped out of the car without so much as another word to the two girls in the front seat as Hinata scooted out behind him, calling her goodbye's, and quickly shutting the door.

Sasuke figured Ino was driving as the car sped off with a few dangerous swerves.

Naruto walked calmly up the walkway as Sasuke stood, and without so much as a word or a glance, the blonde walked by the raven and into the house.

Sasuke looked towards Hinata who was a few paces behind, "What's with him? Is it because I didn't pick him up?"

Hinata shook her head, "We should go inside. He's really upset."

Sasuke looked towards the open door and turned, grabbing the closing door and letting Hinata go in first before walking in himself.  
Naruto limply tossed his bag on the couch just as Hinata and Sasuke walked in the house, and just as Kakashi walked into the living room.

"Hello my own little Sisyphus, how was school?" Kakashi leaned against the wall, crossing his arms across his chest.

Naruto turned to glare before he stormed off down the hallway towards his room, slamming the door to the point the windows shivered and all three onlookers jumped.  
Sasuke looked towards Kakashi and then towards Hinata, clear confusion written all over his face, the three of them exchanging looks.

The raven teen sighed before breezing through the room, walking down the hall and stopping in front of Naruto's door and knocking.  
Sasuke waited for some type of response, or maybe a noise on the other side of the door, but heard nothing.

Sasuke raised his hand again, letting his hand drop a few times before he called tiredly through the door, "Dobe?"

After waiting a grand total of three seconds, Sasuke grabbed at the door handle, actually shocked that it wasn't locked before entering on his own accord.  
Naruto was standing in front of the mirror on his dresser, his wig abandoned on the floor, and wiping the make-up off his face angrily and harshly.

"Are you _that_ mad at me because I didn't pick you up?"

Naruto swept the face wipe over his left eye, never taking his eyes off the mirror, completely ignoring the other presence in the room.

"_Okay_…what's wrong then?"

"_What's_. _Wrong_?" Naruto bit out, "What's wrong is _you_."

Sasuke lips parted at the harsh sentence, the usual teasing in Naruto's always cheery voice gone, and the anger ringing clearly.

"What did _I_ do?"

Naruto turned around, the make-up gone, "What did _you_ do? _You_ took the girl of my dreams!"

Pause.

Blink.  
_  
What_?

"Wh…I didn't take Sakura. Why in the _hell_ would I take Sakura?"

Well, Sasuke would technically _take_ Sakura, tie her up, throw her in the trunk of a car, and drive said car off of a cliff into the ocean.

Naruto quickly ran his right hand through his hair before walking past Sasuke towards the stack of clothes he piled on his bed.

"I should have just listened to you…"

"I'm really not following you _at all_." Sasuke admitted.

"You said she was obsessed with you, and I thought you were just being a dick trying to get your way. Then I saw all these signs she might actually like you, but I just ignored it. Guh! And then, today, after school, she told me she _loves_ you! How in the _fuck-_"

"She _what_?" Sasuke felt like someone had just grabbed his throat.

Naruto kept going like Sasuke wasn't even there, "am I supposed to compete with _you_? Mr. Perfect? Pssh. Wonderful. Lie after lie and plan after plan to have it smack me across the face. Bullshit, you know? But that's how it works, right? I say some stupid love quote trying to prove a point about love and it could be towards family; because hopefully people love their damn family," Naruto grinded his teeth, "and what I say…it turns out, it opens her eyes for you!"

Sasuke mouthed words of confusion while Naruto ranted on, unbuttoning his shirt and flinging it across the room, not caring that Sasuke was there.

"And to top it _all_ off, to put the icing on the shit filled cake, I realized," Naruto laughed in a breathless pathetic way, "that I really _don_'_t_ feel that strongly about her."

"What?" Sasuke's face pulled back, his brain trying to catch up with Naruto's panicking one.

Naruto unhooked his bra, after throwing his fake breasts to two unknown opposing places, and let it fall limply to the ground.

"Che. Can you _fucking_ believe that I thought I was madly in love her or some shit, and here I am, _not_ in love with her? Now I don't even know if I even like her! I don't even know what the fuck I'm doing anymore!"

Naruto threw on his shirt, and caused Sasuke to turn after he started undressing his bottom half.

"I don't even know if I should keep this whole bullshit school girl thing up, and try to keep convincing her to 'see my neighbor', or just give this _confusing_ shit up to you!" Naruto snapped the skirt against the wall after his jeans were securely on his body.

Sasuke snapped his head around after he saw the skirt hit the same wall he was staring at. Naruto was sitting on the edge of his bed, his head in the palm of his hands, and the tips of his golden hair gripped.

"Uh…" Sasuke tried to begin, "Naruto, maybe…"

"Maybe what!?" The blonde snapped.

Sasuke snapped his mouth shut before taking a second before approaching, "I just _thought_ before you make any irrational decisions, that maybe you should think it over. Sort through your feelings. It's not _over_."

Sasuke was holding his breath. He didn't want Naruto to just up and leave.

Lie!

That was a _lie_.

He just didn't want the blonde to settle for someone as cruddy as Sakura.

Because he could…_stay_ with a certain someone.

You know.

"Yeah, sure. Says the guy who has all the fucking girls worshiping him."

Sasuke blew out a long whoosh of breath signaling his impatience, "Maybe you just need a new plan."

Naruto's shoulders barely shrugged, "Like what?"

Sasuke sighed, "We lure her in."

The blonde looked up, "She isn't a fucking rodent."

The raven could easily disagree, "Maybe we should step this up a level."

"You keep saying 'we', which is making my stomach churn."

Naruto couldn't deny that even though he was in such a foul, irritated mood that he had originally blamed on Sasuke, he'd be lying if just seeing the raven and being in the mere presence of was calming him.

Lie!

That was _bullshit_.

Sasuke was giving Naruto anxiety…or butterflies.

Because of … stuff.

Yeah. Stuff.

Sasuke sighed, "Just, try and follow me."

Naruto's eyes shrunk into a sharp glare.

"And _don't_ take everythingI say out of context."

Azure eyes instantly softened with an eye roll, "I'm listening."

* * *

1)I might have used that Sam Keen quote before. (And Naruto referring it to his father _is_ normal because love doesn't meet the boundaries of a life partner.) And before you all go nuts about me saying 'you can't describe love' and all that blah. Please note I will come back to it, so you don't have to get angry or go on tangents and tell me what it is to you. Trust me, I know.  
2) I know I said Sakura said she moved, I just couldn't remember if I said when. I need to make notes. –sigh-  
– Sisyphus: Instead of me going short story on your ass, I hope you will all embrace the loving arms of google.  
Shameless: If you guys read ALLTF, go review please. The fic hasn't been getting enough love lately.


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15** – A Quick First Lesson in Humiliation

**Author's Notes**: _So, it seemed like a common thing that people thought Naruto doesn't like Sakura anymore. I just wanted to state the fact that Naruto is __confused__ about it. He never stated he didn't like her. I know it was kinda worded awkwardly, but the whole thing is going to be addressed more later. Swear_.  
Next week the updates will be back on schedule.

**Warnings**: This chapter is _twice_ as long as my other chapters. (And my favorite _by far_)  
**Hinata **_**will**_** be OOC**. It wouldn't work any other way.  
AAAANNND! –drum roll- _more_ K-I-S-S-I-N-G!  
Rejoice!

**Disclaimer**: I don't own it. I haven't stolen it. But yes, I love it. I don't own Mr. Storm, either. Viva la comic books!

**Rating**: T? For thank bob that Nevi-chan gave us what the fuck we wanted!

**Chapter 15** – A Quick First Lesson in Humiliation

* * *

"So, they are hopeful, not doubtful?"

"What, Ino likes you too?"

Sasuke glared to his left, "_No_. We went through whatever the _fuck_ that was. She snapped out of it."

"No, actually she didn't."

Sasuke turned to his right, glaring towards that whole general vicinity.

"She still likes you, but she'd rather take you from Sakura."

A snort came from somewhere in the room, "Mean, nasty things."

"Okay." Sasuke stopped the group, "_So_, I have two _heartless_ girls secretly fighting over me."

"Secretive is right, huh, Hinata-chan?" Naruto called around Sasuke, who was wedged between them on the couch. "They just tell you all this and act all buddy-buddy?"

The girl nodded, "The only reason they _want_ the prettiest girls in our group of friends is to get to Sasuke-kun."

At that point Sasuke smacked his forehead, letting his hand drag down, "Honestly?"

"Honest. If you don't seem interested, they get rid of them."

"Okay, wait!" Naruto interrupted.

"Oh, boy, the girl wonder strikes again with a stroke of genius." Kiba commented from the floor.

"No, I just want to know something."

"We're all listening Naruto-kun." Kakashi called sweetly after walking by and swiftly kicking Kiba.

"_If_ Sasuke doesn't seem interested in the first place, what makes them think another girl will get him interested in them?"

Sasuke turned to look at Naruto, "You know dobe, I take back every single dumb blonde comment I ever made."

Hinata made a face, "They…find girls who are pretty, _but_ ones they think aren't prettier than them."

"Burn!" Kiba yelled, pointing at Naruto.

"And ones who are…"

There was a long pregnant paused before Naruto finally pushed her to continue, "_Are…_"

"Well, that are pretty, but, aren't…anything…but…"

"DOUBLE BURN!" Kiba fell over laughing.

"Okay," Sasuke said pinching the bridge of his nose, "So, these _girls_ want to find a pretty, dumb, klutz?"

Hinata nodded guiltily.

"Have they _looked_ around lately? That's 95 percent of your school. For crying out… Okay, so what we are dealing with, is-"

"A bitch." Kiba cut in quickly.

"Two girls who want me to fail miserably dating you, which is technically pretending in the first place, so you can go waltzing over to them." Naruto mumbled.

"And the Queen of your dreams is a-"

"I _get_ it!" Naruto snapped.

"_So_," Sasuke tried to continue, "the idea is to make her jealous, and for her to want to make _me_ jealous. Then, that's where the real Naruto will step in."

"Kiba…" Naruto corrected.

"I thought you wanted Kiba as far away as possible because he made some porn comment?"

The two heard Hinata giggle while Kiba snickered.

"No, when I'm dressed as a normal boy-"

"Yeah, normal, sure." Kiba snorted.

Naruto shot Kiba a look, "I'm Kiba."

"And I'm Kakashi." Kiba waved lightly.

Sasuke rubbed his left temple, "Okay, Naruto, you're going to make me a damn list of who the hell is who in your headache scheme, alright?"

Naruto saluted, making Hinata giggle again.

"Now, Naruto as … _a girl_ will set her up with Naruto as _a boy_ where it's all on you." Sasuke gave the blonde a look.

"I can do it."

"To make her jealous," Hinata started quickly before they began bickering, "you have to act more like a couple."

"Like when I was sick?" Naruto questioned, thinking that he could live with that.

Hinata bobbed her head from side to side as if weighing some type of options mentally, "More than that."

Kiba chuckled darkly.

"This is why I called her here," Kakashi commented, "She's going to give you lessons on how to behave and act like a normal couple."

"What have we been doing wrong?" Naruto started before Sasuke even got his thoughts together. "I thought we were doing good the other day."

Hinata stood up off the couch and then turned to face the two teens, "Well, it's the little things that make you and break you."

"Little as in…?" Sasuke tried desperately not to glare.

"When you both look like you want to kill each other while holding hands." Kiba commented as he stood up, and walked forward to stand next to Hinata.

The girl nodded in agreement, "Or when either of you make pained expressions when talking about the other person."

The two of them, despite the seriousness of the conversation, spared an easy chuckle.

"All the arguments."

"All the purposeful teasing."

"Yeah, like the name calling."

"Or the butt smacking."

"Yeah, crossed the line-"

"Okay!" Naruto yelled at the same time as Sasuke, throwing up his hands.

"Okay!" Sasuke snapped along with Naruto, shooting the two a death glare.

Hinata took a deep breath in and then out, "So, I'm going to be giving you lessons."

Kiba snickered.

"And Kiba will be here to help with demonstrations if Hinata-chan needs it." Kakashi added.

"W-what!?" The teen squeaked out.

Naruto snickered next to a smirking raven-haired teen.

Hinata blushed wildly, "Now, I need you two to stand up, please."

The two boys easily complied, the space between them easily two feet apart; Sasuke's arms crossed defiantly over his chest and Naruto looking pained. The two were looking away from each other, their posture turned slightly away, all signs showed they didn't want to be around each other.

"All wrong." She stated.

A pair of midnight eyes and a pair of summer-sky blue's flicked to the girl.

"Didn't you hear anything?" Kiba huffed.

"First, Sasuke-kun, you need to uncross your arms and Naruto-kun, you need to smile."

Sasuke dropped his arms limply by his sides and Naruto looked at Hinata with his mouth wide open, "Whoa, whoa, whoa, Hinata-chan! He never looks _happy_! He _always_ looks fucking constipated!"

"Come again?" Sasuke shot.

"Why do I have to look happy?"

Hinata cleared her throat just as Kiba whistled to get the two teens to shut their mouths.

"Sasuke-kun has an impassive look about him, so of course he never looks happy. _But_ we will be working on that later. So for now, I suppose Naruto-kun, you don't have to look happy. We'll just work on posture and holding."

"Holding?" Naruto looked towards his dad for help.

Idiot.

Kakashi waved back with a bright smile.

"Holding?" Sasuke raised a delicate brow.

"Your posture around each other says a lot about the two of you." Hinata turned towards Kiba.

"Now, when two friends hold a conversation, they tend to be facing each other, but, not necessarily looking at each other at all times. Like I'm showing you."

Kiba was staring at Hinata, their bodies facing each other, and Hinata was looking towards the two teens.

"Also, there is 'space' or a 'comfort zone' that friends are aware of." Hinata moved her hand in between the wide space between her and Kiba.

"Friends might have light touches," Hinata lightly put her hand on Kiba's arm, causing the boy to flame up like Johnny Storm, "And friends also hug."

Hinata boldly walked forward and shared a one-sided embrace with a too-stunned Kiba while Naruto felt like he was going to explode from holding back laughter.

"Other touching zones for friends are the back, and the shoulders. Unless, of course, it's your closest of friends."

Naruto nodded, because he knew, this was mostly directed to him and how girls acted.

"Now, in relationships…"

Kakashi clapped his hands together, "_Oooh!_ Let me go get my camera!"

Sasuke reached his hand up and swiftly thwacked Naruto upside the head.

"What was _that_ for!?"

"He's your father!"

"Okay, if you want to be in a proper relationship, I also suggest you practice certain things at home." Hinata stated over the two.

The three teen boys in the room turned to look at her.

"The things we have already addressed with treating each other properly – facial expressions too, and the things I'm about to address."

Naruto and Sasuke took in one last breath of wonderful, free loving air.

"Alright," Hinata stepped forward, Kiba unconsciously following, "You two need to fill in the space between you. You need to not only act like you belong together, but like you _want_ to belong together."

The two exchanged a quick glance before holding back any comment or looks.

The two each took a step towards each other, biting their tongues and setting their faces.

"Now, in relationships, the two, when talking to each other give each other their full attention. Because, in theory, you want to hear everything your partner has to say."

Kiba chuckled right behind Hinata at her quick joke, wondering absently if hanging out with Naruto in this short time was rubbing off on her.

"We'll get to the facial expressions, but, the touches are important."

Sasuke clenched his jaw and Naruto blew out a whoosh of breath that had has bangs fluttering.

"Tender or loving touches-"

Kakashi squealed as he entered back into the room, camera at the ready.

Kiba rolled his hand for her to continue.

"Is what you're aiming for in this particular situation. Now, even though this special person should also be treated like your best friend, treat them like the most important thing in the world right now."

The two teens nodded, not looking at each other.

"_Always_ make eye contact in this situation. Usually men have trouble keeping eye contact, _but_ you two will have to practice that. Don't look past each other; look _at_ each other like nothing else in the world matters."

"Poetic, Hinata-chan." Kiba commented with a smirk.

Sasuke bit the inside of his cheek instead of saying something, so hard he instantly tasted the horrid copper taste. Naruto clenched his jaw to the point his teeth groaned in protest.  
The two teens faced each other, locked eyes, and glared.

"Softer." Hinata encouraged.

The two set's of eyes slowly, but surely, pulled out of their sharp glares into a softening and awkward stare.

"Okay, _better_. Now remember, you'll have to practice smiles and warm expressions on your own. Now. _Touches_ and _holds_.

Naruto swallowed audibly.

"Naruto-kun, when you're talking to Sasuke, little excited touches are important." Hinata turned around and ushered Kiba a step further.

Hinata put out a shaky hand and tugged on the front of Kiba's shirt twice and then let go before letting her fingertips rest on his clothed stomach and slid them across to sit on his side lightly.

Kakashi snapped a picture of Kiba's face that looked mortified, excited, and on the brink of vomiting.

Hinata pulled away her shaky hand, and let out a breath she didn't know she had pulled in, "Give it a try."

Naruto shut his eyes in a calming manner before opening them again; locking eyes with Sasuke's impassive midnight gaze, and reached forward with an excited smile to match the gesture.

Naruto's right hand reached for Sasuke's shirt, clinging to it like one of his fangirls, before he tugged it twice like he had something he had to say and was excited about. Naruto's hand relaxed against the shirt, his fingertips pressing in till he felt the toned abs of Sasuke's stomach.

The blonde instantly ignored the butterflies that woke in his stomach, playing it off that he was performing in front of an audience and nothing more.  
It couldn't be anything more.

Nope.

Not because the guy who he happened to be touching _might_ be extremely good looking, and he _might_ be touching him.  
_  
Nope_.

Naruto let his finger tips drag across Sasuke's abdomen sweetly, dragging them slowly like he would get caught up in saying something before his hand rounded Sasuke's side, and he let his hand rest there.

"Perfect!" Hinata said sweetly with a smile.

Kakashi snapped another picture before the two teens moved apart.

"Yeah, tweedle-queer, and tweedle-fag." Kiba mumbled.

The two made to pull away before Hinata stopped them, "Wait."

Sasuke was thinking he was going to be needing stitches in his mouth if he clamped down any harder.

"Sasuke, it's your turn."

Yeah, stitches.

"Significant touches to show you notice her or that you're listening are important."

Hinata turned back to Kiba, placing her hand back to forming to his side, "Now, running your hand through her hair is a good one, and not over it. Naruto isn't a dog."

Kiba sputtered out a laugh, "I totally beg to differ Hinata-chan."

The girl playfully smacked him with a light smile, "Or, run your hand up and down the arm that is currently holding you."

Hinata turned to Kiba, who now looked like a deer that had just been trapped by a troop of hunters all on the brink of starvation.

It was Naruto's turn to laugh.

Hinata nodded in encouragement, "Go ahead."

Kiba let his hand quickly skim up Hinata's arm and then quickly through her hair.

Sasuke and Naruto were sputtering two feet away from them, trying to hold in their laughter.

Hinata smiled gently, "Like that, but a little gentler. Also, try cupping his face, and rubbing his cheek or jaw with your thumb."

Kiba stepped away as soon as Hinata's hand dropped, drifting behind the girl and smacking his own forehead hard enough to leave a read mark.

Sasuke turned his attention back to Naruto, who had placed his hand grudgingly back on Sasuke's side. The raven let his pale hand tenderly come up as he placed it softly on Naruto's arm.

"Remember, slowly, but not too slow. Try to smile tenderly."

Sasuke nodded once, not taking his eyes off of Naruto before slowly moving his hand up Naruto's silky soft arm, making sure his touch stayed feather soft and his smile stayed sweet and charming. Sasuke's hand rounded the blonde's shoulder and slowly went up his neck and into his hair.

It was amazing really.

Sasuke had never felt anything like it.

Bright as the golden sun, but soft as the clouds.

Sasuke's hand combed through it once, testing, before his hand came to rest on Naruto's neck. Four of his fingers curling around the back of his slender neck to gently hold him in place, and his thumb gently rubbing his lax jaw line.

"Wonderful." Hinata chirped.

Kakashi took another picture. This one, for blackmail purposes only.

"Now, other ones are-"

Naruto easily pulled back just as Sasuke was dropping his hand, "There's _more_?"

"Naruto-kun, there are _many_, I'm giving you the easy basics for you to play off of."

The blonde cursed something under his breath, causing Sasuke to elbow him sharply in the ribs, "Be polite, dobe. She's helping us."

Naruto turned back to the raven with a surrendering sigh before he took a step in, just as Hinata stopped him.

"Naruto-kun, this time, I want you to try and wrap your arms around his waist, and rest your head on his chest."

"What in _the fu-_"

Kakashi threw a balled up piece of paper across the room at his son's face to silence him, "Listen to the lady!"

Naruto turned back to Sasuke, limply falling into him and throwing his arms around his waist carelessly.

Hinata giggled as Sasuke turned his head this way and that to try and fight off Naruto's unruly locks, Naruto's body limp as he barely held on to Sasuke's frame.

Kakashi snapped another picture for his scrapbook.

Hinata stepped forward, straightening Naruto up and fixing his arms, lacing his fingers together behind Sasuke back, and making sure the side of his head rested comfortably on the raven's chest.

"Sasuke," Hinata began, "rest your chin on his head or next to it, like to whisper in his ear."

Kiba turned just as Kakashi squealed, obviously recalling a memory.

Sasuke did as he was told before he held up his hands, obviously not knowing what to do with them.

"Hold him. Run them up and down his spine and through his hair, something that makes it seem natural and wanted."

Sasuke wrapped his arms awkwardly around the blonde, shifting them oddly in midair as if trying to figure out some type of puzzle before letting them mold to Naruto's back in what looked like a perfect embrace.

Kiba didn't even notice the flash of the camera that time, he was used to it.

"Naruto-kun, it would be a good idea to hug him this way upon seeing him after school. It shows you've missed him."

The blonde pulled back, holding back the facial expression that would show his disgust, "But it's seven hours-"

Kiba, Sasuke, and Kakashi all came forward and smacked Naruto upside the head, muttering words of 'being good' and 'just do as your told'.

"And Sasuke, you might want to kiss the top of his head."

Sasuke snapped his head to give the girl all his attention, holding back a foul look, "Excuse me?"

"Yeah, not so fun now, is it?"

Hinata rushed to continue on, "Also, remember to hold hands, and lace the fingers, not cup them. Also, Naruto try to hold onto his arm sometimes. And _don't_ always hang onto each other, that shows clinginess, which scares couples away from each other. You can always walk next to each other but close to each other."

"You just told me I should kiss him." Sasuke stated in a dead tone.

Hinata cleared her throat in a nervous manner. "I suppose we should move on to kissing and affection."

Kakashi snapped another picture.

Kiba was torn in between rejoicing and stabbing his eyes out.

"Wait, Hinata-chan. You had me kissing him the other day, but you want me to continue this?" Sasuke bit out.

Hinata nodded, "Convincing."

Naruto sighed before he turned back to the raven and wrapped his arms around his waist, lacing his fingers securely.

Sasuke rested his chin on top the blonde's head, the scent of warm spring flowers assaulting his nose. The raven flicked his dark coal eyes to Hinata, waiting for each step by step instruction.

"Just lightly kiss the top of his head. This is also a good way to discreetly say something to one another."

Sasuke placed his lips on top of Naruto's bright hair, mumbling words of hatred to the blonde head.

Naruto chuckled, "Right back at you."

Kakashi ran up next to Kiba, snapped a picture, and ran back over to his corner.

"Okay," Hinata winced, "_kissing_."

Naruto and Sasuke pulled back like they had been burned, and Kiba wasn't sure if he was going to be used as a volunteer or not.

"Now, there are _many_ kisses that mean different things."

"I thought they all meant I want you?" Naruto couldn't help when his face pulled back at his own question.

"Yeah, sure. More like I want to throw up on you." Sasuke replied.

"It all depends on where you kiss and," Hinata blushed, "_How_."

"Well, Hinata-chan, as much as I've been enjoying this wonderful day," Naruto bit out, "I think it's time to cut this short."

"I agree completely." Sasuke joined.

"I think you should get it done and over with." Kiba said over the two.

Naruto looked at Kiba like a penis sprouted out of his head while Sasuke was looking around for something to kill him with.

"Well, hear me out, you are going to have to…you know…kiss again, right?"

"For crying out _loud_!" Naruto yelled.

Sasuke gave Kiba the darkest look he could muster, mouthing words of a promised premature death.

"Okay," Hinata began shakily, "you have chaste kisses. Sasuke, you can kiss his hand, his forehead, his cheek, his temple, or his lips. These are all 'tender' kissing places. Naruto, being the girl, you have to mind kissing and how. Kiss him on his cheek and his lips, but be the one to pull away, you want to be a proper lady."

Kiba snorted.

Hinata turned towards Kakashi where the man put his camera down and stepped forward; obviously knowing she wasn't comfortable with the rest.  
Kakashi patted the girl sweetly on the head and stood next to her.

"Alright, Sasuke-kun, why don't you try giving Naruto-kun a quick little kiss on the cheek."

Sasuke kissed Naruto's cheek so quickly and so lightly, the blonde had actually turned to look at him expectantly to get it over and done with.

"Obviously, as Naru-chan just pointed out, speed isn't the best thing. It doesn't quite convince anyone either. It doesn't look like you _want_ to kiss him. That's the most important part of this entire _thing_, making this entire act _convincing_. Now try again, a little slower and linger a little longer than half a millisecond."

Sasuke began leaning across the space between them before Kakashi stopped him, "And try cupping the other cheek, it looks sweeter."

Sasuke sighed before reaching his left hand up, cupped Naruto's cheek and leaned in and kissed the other. Naruto screwed his eyes shut tightly before Kakashi corrected him.

"Naru-chan, don't looked pained, look relaxed."

Naruto let his eyelids relax as Sasuke's pillow soft lips lingered on his cheek before pulling away and his hand trailing not far behind.

"Now, Naruto, sweetheart-"

"Dad, come on!"

Kakashi chuckled, "Give him a little peck on the nose."

"Oh _please_."

"Something cute that doesn't have to be done everyday," Kakashi pointed out.

Naruto rolled his eyes, leaning just slightly on his tip-toes to lean forward and plant a feathery soft kiss on Sasuke's nose.

"Okay, for this one, Naruto your back needs to be to Sasuke."

Naruto looked at his father for the briefest of moments, "Dad, 'never turn your back on an enemy' comes to mind."

Kakashi gave the blonde a warning look, the one that would scare any child to do what was to be done.

Naruto spun on his heel and the two teens looked to Kakashi for further instructions, "Now Sasuke-kun, wrap your arms around Naruto."

"Where?"

"Anywhere that feels natural."

Sasuke contemplated his neck for a fraction of a second before tucking them under his arms and wrapping them around his abdominal area.

The butterflies in Naruto's stomach fluttered awkwardly when he felt Sasuke's own heartbeat drum against his back in what felt like a soothing lullaby. The blonde could swear it was beating faster than a normal heart should, but not by much.

He was probably just imagining things.

"Perfect. Now, this is a good maneuver for you when he isn't paying attention. Walk up behind him, embrace him, and then give a tender kiss. Try the temple. That's going to need a little head turn from you Naruto-kun."

The two teens sighed before Naruto turned his head so Sasuke's lips came in contact with his temple.

"Flawless."

Sasuke pulled away just as Naruto took a quarter of a step away from the raven.

"Alright, now, the uncomfortable part."

"You know something; you're as unbelievable as your son." Sasuke commented sourly.

"Well, kissing on the lips is the finishing touch to this masterpiece."

"You comparing me to him is a fucking insult." Naruto shot.

"Alright," Kakashi clapped his hands together, "you should obviously face each other like before."

The two turned to face each other, refusing to look at each other before Hinata corrected them from behind Kakashi and next to Kiba.

"Remember! Eye contact and feeling!" Kiba called louder through laughter.

Naruto wondered if it was more humiliating because he had to just kiss Sasuke, or because he was doing it in front of his father and friends.

Or because he was wrestling with feelings.  
_  
No_. One of the first two. He was _not_ wrestling with feelings when it came to Sasuke. NO! The _teme_.

"Now, don't forget contact as well, it's more convincing." Kakashi stated.

"I'll contact my fist to your face." Sasuke grumbled under his breath, causing Naruto to smile despite the situation.

Sasuke barely leaned down, his fingers reaching out to Naruto's chin to tip up his face ever-so-slightly, while Naruto's hands reached for Sasuke's hips.  
It was like they had been dating for years, like they had been through this scenario a hundred times before.

Their heads titled opposite ways ever so slightly so as to not bump noses, their eyelids slid shut at the exact same time when their noses brushed against each other in a ghosting sweet touch. The corners of Naruto's mouth curled up ever-so-slightly, so slightly that no one could really tell, except the midnight eyes that were catching one last look at the teen he was about to kiss.

Sasuke's fingers trailed from Naruto's chin smoothly and lightly, to tracing a tan jaw with his fingertips, to running down his small neck, his other hand having a mind of it own to go and rest peacefully on the small of Naruto's back. Sasuke's pale hand stood out against the tan complexion of the blonde's neck; four fingers sweetly holding his neck while his thumb gently rubbed Naruto's jaw with tender strokes.

The raven wanted to pull back and give the blonde a triumphant smirk as he felt the bumps rise under his gentle touch, but he realized something absolutely amazing…

Naruto's hands instantly began floating to around Sasuke's back, grasping at his shirt slightly, and the blonde raised up on his toes to press harder against the perfect silk lips of the Uchiha.

Just as he was about to pull back like the 'lady' he was supposed to be, he realized something wonderfully astounding…

They didn't want it to end.

Naruto's breath caught in his throat right around the same time Sasuke's eyes snapped open, their realizations snapping them back to the reality of where they were and who they were in the presence of.

The blonde slowly pulled off, his eyelids slowly fluttering open as he eased back down to a firmly planted position. Sasuke removed his hands just as Naruto did, the two flinching away from each other when they bumped hands.

Naruto turned to see that his dad was flicking through pictures he had just taken on his digital camera. Hinata was staring _anywhere_ but the two teen boys, her face and neck red beyond comparison. Kiba - Naruto sighed - was gone.

Kakashi looked up, "Glad you came up for air, boys. That was perfect. How was that for your first kiss, Na-kun?"

Naruto let his eyelids flutter shut as he groaned slightly in embarrassment, while Sasuke stiffened beside him.

The grayed man smiled, "I deem this, a success. I just hope Sasu-kun doesn't get sick…"

"I hope the fucking bastard chokes!" Kiba yelled from the kitchen.

Naruto and Sasuke spared each other a quick glance, the awkwardness flying away with Kiba's words, and with that, the two fell on the couch laughing loudly.

* * *

Author's Notes: So, I got carried away with the length, but in all honesty, I could have gone on _so much more_. But this fiction is supposed to have _short_ chapters.  
-skips- Yeah, favorite chapter yet. –twirls-  
_If I owe you a PM or an e-mail or whatever, I've been unnaturally busy the past two days and I'm sorry. Sunday I'll be on my IM and I'll be writing everyone back. _


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16 – Kisses for Gym Class

**Author's Note**: _Note: I'll be saying when they are falling in love. They don't even know what's going on now, like if the other ever feels the same way, what they are felling, if it's just gas… that isn't love. That's _confusion._ AND I'll be saying when they have sex, just like in RTB. Guys, from sorting through feelings to hating each others guts… you sure do know how to make awkward situations. Rape isn't cute and awkward situations like sex too soon gives me, the author, a headache.  
Last, and forever not least, thank you for all the reviews. For everyone who liked my favorite chapter and who are surely now going to kill me for this one. –dies_

Here is the gym class stuff everyone has been begging to know about.

Warnings: They're still kissing. It's pretty blunt and straight forward. Foul Language. And a cliffy.

Disclaimer: I still don't own anything. Really.

Rating: T for Think about this bitch, we will kill you if keep teasing us. XD

Chapter 16 – Kisses for Gym Class

* * *

"Do we have to walk?" Naruto grumbled, silently thanking the gods that it was Friday.

"Do you have to whine?"

"Yes."

Sasuke rolled his eyes.

"It's not that far, you act as if we walked all the way from your house."

The blonde turned to glare, only to have one of his pigtails smack Sasuke across his face.

The raven batted the hair away with his left hand, more tempted to rip the wig off than anything else before glaring, "Do you ever pay attention to anything you do?"

The blonde glared, "Of course I-"

The blonde stumbled when his heel twisted underneath him, Sasuke's hand swinging out to catch him from falling.

Sasuke righted him before smirking at the blonde, "You were saying?"

"I was saying that I'm going to kick you in the balls once we get home."

Sasuke tightened his grip on Naruto's hand just as Sakura and Ino were in sight in front of the school, the blonde barely wincing.

"What was that?"

Naruto turned to face him, turning his wince into a wonderfully convincing smile, "I'm going to drown you in a bucket of your precious hair gel."

Sasuke let out a convincing chuckle before leaning down to kiss Naruto's cheek just as the two girls approached without Hinata in sight.

"Hey you two," Sakura choked out more painfully than normal.

Naruto turned to face Sakura, always excited at the thought of seeing her.

The sight of the perfect Sakura he had stuck in his mind since he saw her walking by that fateful day, not the picture that was painted with the information Hinata had passed along.

He'd keep hanging on to that perfect image of her.

But today, looking at her was suddenly and painfully different.

When he turned to see her with her always bright eyes and heart pounding smile, her too perfect body, something was different.

Naruto wasn't excited at all.

The blonde took in a sharp breath that the two girls didn't hear as they chatted away about nothing to Sasuke, who easily ignored them, but the raven's eyes flicked to the blonde.  
Naruto blinked his eyes, wondering if it was just some type of fluke or delay. He figured all blonde's had a delay; hell, Ino had a two second one herself.  
He knew the heart pounding would come. The palm sweats and the nervous stutters. The butterflies would just come to life without warning.

He knew.

It had been happening since he noticed Sakura and it never showed any reason to stop.

Nothing of the sorts happened.

He even felt the need to mentally start counting.

Naruto felt emotions run through him as he stared at the girl, sure. He tried to put his finger on them, but apparently he hadn't been doing a good enough job keeping all of the internal struggling inside.

Sasuke swooped down, placing his lips on Naruto's temple and began whispering, "What the hell is wrong with you?"

The blonde looked over at the two girls who were obviously holding back glares before wrapping his arms around Sasuke's neck, discreetly talking into his folded arms.

"_Sorry_. I'll get over it."

"Do that. You look like you're about to vomit because I'm holding your hand."

"It was a passing thought." Naruto joked with a chuckle.

Sasuke locked his jaw at the ghosting breath that cascaded over his skin when the blonde laughed lightly.

Sasuke pulled back, kissing Naruto on his forehead tenderly and refusing to spit at the powder that had dirtied his lips.

Correction.

He was going to spit because he kissed Naruto.

Yeah.

"I'll see you after school."

The blonde smiled, lifting up on his tip-toes and placing a soft kiss on the tip of Sasuke's nose, the raven putting on a practiced smile.

"Text me when you can." Naruto replied in his girlish voice.

Naruto had to admit, if he saw a couple act like this, he'd vomit or ask for a copy of the script.

Sasuke turned to the girls, his hand running down Naruto's arm gently, "See you after school, girls."

With one more swift kiss on the cheek, Sasuke set off back towards the parking lot, and Naruto faced the two girls alone.

* * *

Sasuke let his car rest in the spot in the parking lot.

He stared off through the windshield still, staring at nothing, wondering about too much.

Kakashi had got in his head, that was a given.

He had been thinking about what he liked so much about Naruto constantly _since_ the old man mentioned it.

Sasuke could swear it was nothing. He was physically attractive, sure, but everyone has nice features.

The raven swore the idiot blonde was moronic and annoying. Someone to just grind on his nerves and keep away the fangirls.

But Sasuke would even admit, alone, in a room and quietly in his head that that was now a lie. He wasn't annoying and didn't grind on his nerves, and the fangirls were worse than ever apparently.

Now here he was, _kissing_ him like it was the most natural thing in the world, and it feels normal.

It feels…

Knock. Knock. Knock.

Sasuke practically jumped out of the car at the sudden knocking that came to the window of his car, only to turn to see Shikamaru there, cigarette resting sweetly in between his lips.  
The raven cut the engine that he didn't even realize he had left running, grabbed his backpack, and stepped out of the car.

Shikamaru eyed him, "Where in the _fuck_ have you been?"

"Where I always am."

"That's bullshit."

"And why's that?"

"Because," Shikamaru took a long drag before flicking the butt against the window of Sasuke's car, "do you know how much I've tried to get a hold of you?"

The other teen shrugged his shoulders.

"I've been by your house some obscene amount of times. And get yourself a fucking secretary because your unavailability with _your phone_ is getting on my nerves."

"So," Sasuke smirked, "you're saying you've missed me."

"Temari and I wanted to go on a double with you and Naru-chan, but you picking up your phone is a damned chore. Hell, you disconnecting from that woman is a chore. Does she have heroin in her saliva?"

The raven glared.

"I thought you weren't even serious about her? Before you two were fighting like my mom and dad. What in the hell happened?"

Sasuke sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "That's the hardest question I've ever had to answer."

* * *

Naruto looked around at all the girls before looking down at the floor and blushing wildly.

Every boy's dream and he felt too polite to frolic in it.

"Naru-chan!" Ino called, "Where is your locker?"

The blonde pointed a slender finger in some direction before walking off, bumping into girls, and muttering apologizes without meetings their eyes.

The day couldn't get any worse.

First, Hinata didn't come to school. When Naruto finally had a minute to text her and ask why, he found out there was a family emergency.

Then, Naruto was left to deal with Ino and Sakura – alone.

Naruto had then suddenly somehow come to realize just how much the two of them talked about Sasuke, and Naruto then realized just how that made him feel.

The idiot was actually jealous.

The blonde passed it off as being so wrapped up in his role of being Sasuke's girlfriend and nothing more.

Not that he might, in some small form, be forming some sort of feelings for him.

No damn way.

Maybe? A little, tiny bit?

No. He'd deny it.

But he still didn't get why when he looked at Sakura he wanted to scream at her. Like someone had flipped some switch suddenly. How he was still trying to convince himself that he had to pursue her, because of the lengths he had gone and how he 'known' Sakura before, even despite the fact he was struggling to hold back nasty comments.

Not to mention that all this acting was draining him.

He fell asleep in math class while going over everything he was acting out.

He was acting as a girl, acting as daughter, acting as a girlfriend, acting like a friend, and now he felt like he was acting like he still liked Sakura.

The worse part was right before he drifted off to sleep on his Geometry book; he had a passing thought of how he _didn't_ have to act in front of Sasuke.

And how wonderful that was.

The only reason he got caught for sleeping, was he was mumbling in his sleep about 'evil bastards' and 'horrible plots'. Thank something and everything no one noticed the girlish tone was gone.

To top off the 'wonderful' and 'insightful' day, was when Naruto walked into what he thought was going to be another simulating day in nap – health class, he found out that health was over.

It was now being turned over to Gym Class.

Apparently the girls had a rotating schedule, and Naruto happened to transfer in just near the end of health. The girls felt sympathy for her.  
So here Naruto was, in the locker room with the girl of 'his dreams', while she's unchanging with a slew of other girls; and he can't stand to look at her.

What. The. Fuck?

The blonde shuffled his feet towards a secluded area of the locker room, looking down at his piece of paper searching for his locker before he found the tiny square with a scowl.

"How in the hell is my backpack supposed to fit in this?" Naruto whispered.

"You have to leave it outside." Ino said from behind him in surprise, causing Naruto to jump and fall back.

Ino giggled before offering Naruto her hand, which Naruto surprising had a hard time taking and not glaring at.

He kept telling himself all day that it was because these girls held themselves a step higher and were scheming against him.

Nothing else.

Naruto dusted himself off, before looking at the other blonde, "Then what's the point? We all the have same uniform."

Ino rolled her eyes, "I know, right? It's also for your more valuable items. People in schools like these do have valuable stuff you know, and some lesser fortunate people need it."

Naruto always liked Ino. She seemed like the overly friendly type.

The moment he found out she was scheming against him; he liked her a little less.

The second she finished making a comment about poor people in a rich school stealing shit, he wanted to spit in her face.

He could go off on a tangent, sure. How 'lesser fortunate people' don't _need_ anything. They get by fine. They aren't spoiled. They have cars that get to two-hundred thousand miles instead of five-thousand before selling. They have hand-me-downs instead of fresh off the racks with brand names. They don't have their house full of pointless food that doesn't get eaten; they eat till the fridge is bare. They don't entertain guests, they have friends over. They don't have pools and mansions. They have happiness, family and a fucking _brain_.

Or he could smack her across her face.

He didn't do either.

Naruto knew it was just because she held herself a step above him and that was all. Not because he had been staring at her all day knowing she was crushing on the guy he was pretending to be with, while secretly acting like she was better than Naruto, and truly not his friend.

Yeah, Naruto just let his anger drift that way.

He wasn't a jealous idiot.

Not in the least.

Naruto stood there, looking around anywhere but her, waiting for the girl to catch the hint of – '_Get lost so I can change_.'

"Oh!" Ino finally said after a good moment, "I'll give you some privacy."

Naruto wasn't sure if he was sneering or smiling when the girl walked off.

The blonde held up the gym uniform and sighed.

It wasn't as bad as he thought.

It was just a tight gray shirt with the school insignia on the back, and black loose fitting pants. Naruto took out tennis shoes from his backpack gratefully, not even caring they were black and pink, only caring that they _weren't_ heels.

He would get his wonderful balance back.

His lovely, wonderful, purposeful, and all around _great_ balance that he now cherished with his entire soul.

Right up there with boxers and undershirts.

The blonde tossed his things on the ground, twitching every time he heard a voice approach, and relaxing his tensed muscles when they breezed by.

He was the only one with a locker in this aisle; he wasn't even sure why he was panicking so much.

Oh, yeah.

He was _changing clothes_, when he was _cross dressing_, in an _all girl's school_.

Well, what could he say aside he loved taunting death?

The blonde listened hard for one long second before hitching his breath and yanking his shirt over his head, being mindful of his wig.

Naruto instantly yanked off his skirt and kicked off his heels, left to stand in his bra, fake breasts, male briefs and wig.

The blonde bent over and grabbed the pair of pants gratefully, stepping into one of the legs with a sigh.

But the moment he heard the shocked gasp behind him, he realized that a skirt or pants didn't matter.

Someone had just caught him.

* * *

Author's Notes: See what happens when you anger the author? You make them do this.  
Kidding. You guys made me a very happy author with all the extra support lately.  
And you people thought you read my cliff hangers…save for those of you who just hopped on board from ALLTF, you poor souls. And I already know the drill; you'll hang me by my toes and beat me accordingly. I get it. See you next week.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17 – Loneliness is Togetherness

Author's Notes: _I got so many 'dun dun duns' and SO many predictions… I loved it. Those are the type of reviews that I LOVE. Well… the long ones too. But, I was 'squee' this and 'squee' that. How much you want to bet you didn't see this all this coming?  
Well…some of it you saw a little tiny part…but not all of it. –waves- _

**Also:** _I shut off the PMs and everything because I was tired of the bitching. Maybe when everyone goes back to how they used to be – which would be having MANNERS – we will talk about turning them back on._

Warnings: I'm being quiet.

Disclaimer: I don't own it.

Rating: I'm not saying anything, but no, they aren't having sex you pervy-pervs.

Chapter 17 – Loneliness is Togetherness

* * *

Sasuke was sitting in class, paying attention to Hinata's cousin to the best of his ability, but it was hard when his mind was tumbling over things it shouldn't, and Shikamaru was snoring behind him.

Friday's always seemed like this, but now his drifting seemed worse. The raven practically jumped out of his skin when his phone started buzzing in his pocket, the vibration loud in the almost silent classroom.

Neji gave him one strong glance before continuing on.

Sasuke dug his phone out of his pocket, wondering who in the hell could be texting him in the middle of the day in the middle of class.

The raven flipped open the phone.  
_  
Message from:  
The Dobe_

Sasuke stomach clenched lightly. Sasuke glanced up at his teacher in hopes he was being discrete enough to get away with this, and noticed Neji was still ranting, and read on.

'_Please, please, please, HELP! Someone caught me!_'

Sasuke didn't even hesitate at grabbing his bag while swiftly sliding out of his seat, his teacher stopping and looking at him oddly.

"Uchiha-kun, is ever-"

"Family emergency."

And before Neji or a just woken Shikamaru had a chance to react, Sasuke was running out the door.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Sasuke was cursing under his breath as he fumbled through his short list of contacts trying to find Naruto's number while he jogged through the hallways and out into the parking to his car.

He just couldn't believe that damn dobe had been caught.

Sasuke pressed the phone to his ear just as he came to his car, fumbling with the button to unlock the door and the remote start. Sasuke practically flew in the car after throwing in his bag carelessly while he listened to the rings carry on tunelessly in his ear before they cut off.

If he got a voicemail, he was going to scream.

"Hello…? Dobe?" Sasuke couldn't hear anything on the other line.

Then he heard a sniffle, and then a hiccup, "_Sasuke…_"

Sasuke felt a tightening in his chest at the soft sound, the hurt sound on the other end of the line.

The raven was peeling out of the parking lot before he really could process what he was doing, and putting started Ino to shame as he cut off the traffic coming from both ways without really registering what he was doing; except to get to Naruto.

"What in the _fuck_ happened in four damn hours?" The raven dangerously swerved around a car.

Another sniffle, "_I thought I was the only one left…_"

"What are you talking about, Naruto?"

"_Gym class…_"

Sasuke could hear Naruto cursing under his breath, and shuffling the phone awkwardly.

"Where are you?"

"_I'm in the bathroom stall in the locker room…_"

Sasuke cut the engine after he parked across three spaces and practically kicked open the door, not having bothered with his seatbelt.

"I'll be there."

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Naruto had a feeling that when Sasuke cut his phone off, he was pissed. Hell, Naruto felt like the biggest idiot in the world right now. He had been _careless_. Then, to top it all off, the first person he thought to call was Sasuke. The bastard had been on his mind all day, so when he panicked, he just instantly sent him a message.

Now here he was, stuck in a bathroom stall, with Sasuke coming to get him.

And he was betting all his money on the teme being pissed.

"Dobe!?"

The blonde's head lifted up from inspecting the floor, "Teme…"

Naruto heard a sigh and quickened paces, before the footsteps came to a halt further back than they should have.

"Sasuke-kun!" A female voice chirped in surprise.

Naruto's voice hitched at the sound of the same voice that had caught him, and the thought of Sasuke being in the presence of.

He was the known 'girlfriend' of Sasuke. So Naruto being caught with, well, his pants down, was dragging Sasuke's reputation down to the bottom of the barrel as well.

"Sakura." Sasuke's voice sounded more annoyed and clipped than usual.

"What…here…the girl's…"

"Naru-chan called me fairly upset."

"I need to talk to you about her…well…hi-"

Sasuke sighed loudly, rudely, "Can you spare me for just a minute, or at least follow me."

Naruto listened hard before he heard the girl give some sort of sound as agreement before he heard two sets of footsteps begin to approach.

"Naru-chan," Sasuke said sweetly as he approached the stalls.

Naruto tapped on the stall door that he was currently occupying, though his feet gave him away.

The blonde looked down towards the floor, his azure eyes following an approaching shadow before Sasuke's dress shoes appeared in sight.

"Open the door."

"But…"

"Its fine."

Naruto reached a shaking hand up to undo the lock before stepping back, the door jerking open on it's own before Sasuke pushed it all the way.

Sasuke really hadn't been expecting to see what he saw.

Naruto was standing there, in his gym clothes that he grabbed in his haste to run away. Black lines were down his face, smeared in certain places, and two large black smudges under his eyes. The redness that covered the white of his eyes was blatantly apparent, and the puffiness around his eyes made Sasuke clench his jaw. The false eye lashes that his father usually tacked on were gone, and the lip gloss was missing.

"Have you been crying?" Sasuke's eyes shrunk dangerously.

Naruto sniffled as he inspected the floor, "No."

Sasuke rolled his eyes, "Sakura, what did you do?"

"Sasuke-kun, I didn't do anything!"

"Then _why_ is _my_ girlfriend _crying_?"

"I'm not crying!" Naruto whined, his girlish voice barely present.

"Why _was_ she crying?" Sasuke turned back on Sakura, his eyes fierce.

"I want to know why 'she's' in boy's underwear and has fake breasts. And she's saying 'her' wig is for cancer-"

"Sakura," Sasuke said as coldly as possible, "What are you insinuating?"

"I…"

"Are you insinuating that _I_ would be dating a _guy_?"

"Well…"

"Did it ever process in that oversized, neon head of yours that I accidentally spilt juice on Naru-chan while she was eating breakfast with my brother and I. So instead of making her tardy for school, I gave her the old uniform that belonged to my cousin and sadly had to let her settle for my underwear. To answer the age old question, I prefer briefs. The fake breasts, Sakura, was because she felt a little _self conscience_."

"Sasuke-kun…"

"And to be fucking heartless enough to even _think_ about the wig…don't you have gym?"

The girl opened her mouth and shut it quickly, nibbling on her bottom lip with a pained look before turning on her heel and practically sprinting for the gymnasium.

Sasuke turned back to the blonde, who had taken to fumbling with the bottom of his shirt, "Come on, dobe."

"Did you have to yell at her?" Naruto whispered.

"I didn't yell." Sasuke reasoned.

The blonde shuffled his feet again, "You're the dumbest liar in history."

"She left us alone, didn't she?"

Naruto let out a shaky sigh, before Sasuke reached forward and gripped the back of his neck, pulling him forward and out of the stall, and steering him out of the school.

* * *

Naruto rubbed his right eye with the back of his hand, still staring out the window from the passenger seat.

"Dobe, look at me."

Naruto shook his head, gripping the wig with his left hand as it sat in his lap.

"Dobe, stop being such a dobe." Sasuke glanced at the blonde with a despairing look that thankfully went unnoticed.

The raven slowed when he neared the blonde's house, glancing up the street before sparing the blonde one more look before pushing back down on the gas pedal without so much as a second thought.

Naruto tore his eyes away from the familiar scenery that he had memorized, looking over at Sasuke and past him just as he watched his house fly by.

"Where are we-"

Sasuke sighed, "Do you really want to explain this to your dad?"

Naruto turned to look as his house disappeared around the corner they turned, "Well, no."

"My brother isn't home to harass us; I'll take you there till the end of school."

"My make-up…"

Sasuke chuckled at the statement, "I'll think of something."

"He'll think we're…" Naruto blanched, "You know…"

Sasuke slowed the car in the middle of the empty street; the middle of the day with everyone at work or school. "Do you want your dad assuming things, or him not wanting you to continue this?"

Naruto hadn't turned back around from staring at where his house was, "Keep driving, Sasuke."

Neither one of them would admit that they didn't care about Kakashi.

Neither one of them would admit they just wanedt to continue what they had going for one certain little reason.

Because denial can be such a bitch.

* * *

Naruto stood there, for the second time in his life in someone else's underwear.

Because boxers were far more comfortable than the dastardly briefs.

He was once again drowned in one of Sasuke's shirts, and a pair of loose fitting jeans that were barely strapped to his hips by one of the raven's belts.

Sasuke opened the door after what he assumed was a safe amount of time to his own bedroom, intent on not recreating something that was mortifying.

"Dobe?"

Naruto kept staring towards the computer desk that Sasuke often occupied, not taking his eyes away while the raven entered his own room.

"What?" Sasuke tried to let his eyes follow the path of the beautiful blue, but was lost.

"You look…so different." The blonde walked forward towards Sasuke's desk, and reached out and took a picture in his hands.

Sasuke chuckled with a furrowed brow, "I was seven. Of course I look different."

Naruto shook his limp hair lightly, "You're smiling."

Sasuke snorted as he took the familiar picture of Shikamaru and himself being held in the air by Itachi. "Everyone smiles, Naruto."

Naruto looked at Sasuke with still sad eyes, still smeared make-up, "But you only do it when you think no one is looking."

Sasuke spared a few extra blinks before setting the picture back on his desk and led Naruto out of the room trying hard not to curse under his breath.

He also had to remember to set a scowl in the only presence that could bring out his smile.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Naruto was sitting in the biggest, most comfortable chair he had ever sat in or laid eyes upon, and despite the afternoons actions that kept playing in his mind, he was becoming less tense.

Sasuke handed over a warm rag to the practically drooling blonde, his jaw set with his intentions of looking less happy, "We can't have you running around looking like a ruined drag queen, now can we?"

The blonde chuckled, shaking his head and lightly taking the rag from Sasuke, "Keep that up and I'll tell Shikamaru what a softy you are."

Sasuke straightened up, "Do your worst. I have too much dirt on him."

Naruto snorted, roughly wiping his face.

"Geez, dobe. Leave some skin on."

"Say, teme?"

Sasuke stopped on his way to the kitchen, intent on getting Naruto an icepack for his face as a joke, "What?"

"Where are your parents?"

Sasuke clenched his teeth to a painful extent before walking back into the room, Naruto watching each step he took while stopping his ministrations of trying to practically peel away his skin.

Sasuke sat on the soft, plush stool in front of the blonde, taking the rag out of his hands and raising it to the blonde's face and began lightly wiping the places he easily missed.

Naruto instantly flushed, "You don't have to do that."

"What made you ask?"

Naruto swallowed thickly, "You always just mention your brother."

Sasuke nodded stiffly, gently wiping his small tan nose, "My mom is in New York I think, and I'm guessing my dad is in Paris. I lose track. Don't give me that look."

Naruto's face was in between pity and pain and utter shock, "But-"

"They're business people Naruto, it happens."

"But-"

Sasuke purposely poked Naruto's left eye with the rag, "_Ow_! Damn, teme."

"Dobe, I know it seemed like Itachi and I are just looking for an excuse to kill each other, but I swear, it's…" Sasuke looked around, checking, "the best living with him."

Naruto rubbed his eye, "But-"

"One more damn 'but' Naruto and I'll let Kakashi know _everything_." Sasuke threatened.

"Low blow," Naruto practically pouted.

Sasuke went back to wiping off Naruto's face, the two acting like it happened every day, "What else? I can see it in your face."

Naruto gave a feeble grin, "Why do you go to that school?"

"Academia?"

The blonde nodded, poking himself in the right eye with the wash cloth where Sasuke was cleaning under, making Sasuke chuckle.

Sasuke shrugged, "I'm a Uchiha."

"Congrats. I'm a Uzumaki, you want a soda? A medal?"

Sasuke rolled his dark-as-night eyes, "Uchiha's have been going there since the school was built, dobe."

Naruto nodded slowly, making Sasuke huff, "What else?"

"Why me and not someone else?"

"What?" Sasuke stopped halfway through cleaning under Naruto's left eye, erasing the black smudge.

"It's been bothering me, you know? Why me, some idiot guy with this dumb scheme and not some really pretty _smart_ girl to get the girls off your back? I just have to know."

"Why is this bothering you?" Sasuke let his hand retreat.

"Because I don't understand it."

"What's to understand?" Sasuke could feel the defensive tone seeping in his voice.

"Everything, you know? Why me and _not_ Sakura?"

Sasuke visibly gagged while Naruto continued on.

"Why a cross-dressing guy and not some pretty girl?"

"Guys are easier to deal with than girls…"

"Why some idiot blonde instead of a smart girl?"

"You aren't that dumb, dobe."

"I _obviously_ get on your nerves."

Sasuke sighed, "Everyone gets on my nerves, and you've even said it."

"I'm like, monopolizing your time because now you're stuck in this stupid scheme…"

Sasuke grumbled, "I'm _not_ stuck, Naruto." Sasuke refused to mention that it was him monopolizing Naruto's time.

"Then _explain_." Naruto practically whined.

"I can't."

"Is it that hard?"

Sasuke stood up from his seat, "Is it _that_ important?"

Naruto stood up as well, just a few inches shorter, his blue eyes fierce, "Yes! It is!"

Sasuke's hand that had been previously holding left the object to fall on the floor before shooting out to grab at the back of Naruto's neck, and yanked the other teen forward roughly, causing him to stumble.

Naruto's hands fell against Sasuke's chest to catch himself from causing them to fall, just as Sasuke's lips caught Naruto's quickly in a kiss.

Sasuke screwed his eyes shut while his free hand naturally came up to cup Naruto's cheek, while he pressed his lips against the blonde's.

Naruto's eyes were staring in disbelief at what was taking place, his hands not able to push the other teen away or willingly pull him forward. Naruto didn't know if he should kiss back or knee Sasuke in the balls.

Everything felt so right but in the back of Naruto's head, he knew _something_ had to be wrong.

He was _trying_ to find something wrong, but really couldn't find one thing.

He was still trying to sift through his feelings, and this happens.

What felt like ten years was only a short four seconds long before Sasuke pulled away, their lips causing the lightest of smacking sounds before Sasuke's hands fell limp by his sides, Naruto's hands finally falling as well.

Sasuke's midnight eyes bore into Naruto's blank azure gaze; the blonde still, for some unknown reason, waited for the answer.

"Just because."

* * *

Author's Notes: I'm getting there, I'm getting there_.  
And before everyone asks…Naruto's little scheme isn't going to go on forever.  
-cracks knuckles- Alright. I'm going to try…again… focus on rewriting and editing. All you crazy bastards are reading my old shit. It's making me cringe.  
Enjoy the update, review, let's be friends._


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18** – Confusion is Most Certainly Certain

Author's Notes: _Uh…Well…here we are…from good…to a little drama. Sorry…it happens. _  
BUT THANK YOU…last chapter was the most popular so far. So…it means a lot.  
-scratches head- Someone asked why I've been taking a week between the updates when in my profile it says I have a certain amount of chapters done. –laughs- I want to make sure I don't fall behind and I _might_ be taking more than a week this time simply because chapters that I've hit now are more difficult.

Warnings: Nothing really. Sweet and pasty with a side of a little drama. Crudeness, because it happens. Oh, and so much foul language you'd think this was a bad horror film.

Disclaimer: I own it all. That's right. All of it. Every single drop. My soda is my soda and you bitches can't have any. Naruto? Oh! No, not mine.

Rating: T because my foul language meter was in the red. We've all had those angry moments where we lose our tongues. Yeah.

**Chapter 18** – Confusion is Most Certainly Certain

* * *

"Hey, Hinata?"

The girl looked down with a light smile, her eyes crinkling at the corners, "Yes?"

Naruto tilted his head back to look up at her, the back of his head lying on her thigh comfortably while his legs dangled over the arm of the couch.  
The two of them were hanging out together, just the two of them – now - enjoying a day of doing absolutely nothing. It mostly consisted of girlish things, which had the blonde laughing most of the time, but this one had Hinata giggling every few seconds.

Naruto's bangs had been tied up on top of his head in a tiny ponytail, a light blue bandana wrapping partly in his hair and across his forehead, and a few extra barrettes to collect the stray blonde strands that were too wild. Hinata's long hair was wrapped up into a polite bun a top her head, a dark blue bandana holding back her bangs from her forehead, and a few barrettes too littered her hair.

The two of them had identical green paste evenly covering their faces; the facial portion of the day seeming more relaxing than any other part.

Naruto was guessing it was due to the fact that Kiba wasn't complaining about getting something done since he volunteered to go out and get the pizza, and Kakashi wasn't squealing like a girl over anything.

Kiba was sweet enough to drag the older man out the door with him.

"If someone kissed you, and said 'Just because…', how would you take that?" Naruto held up his shiny, manicured nails and studied them.

Hinata giggled after a second, "A bit confused."

Naruto sighed, dropping his hand, "Yeah…"

Hinata ran a sweet hand through his undone hair soothingly, "What's wrong Naruto-kun?"

Naruto's sky blue eyes flicked up to meet knowing light gray, and he sighed, "The question of the hour."

Hinata patted his shoulder sweetly, "Take your time."

The blonde went to itch his nose before Hinata grabbed his wrist, giving him a look before Naruto gave a childish huff and crossed his arms.

"What's bothering you, Naruto-kun?"

Naruto sighed roughly, "Have you ever liked someone you shouldn't?"

Hinata's pasted brow furrowed lightly, "I'm not sure I'm following you…"

Naruto sighed heavily, running his fingertips over the sweetly sitting bandana before flicking his eyes up to his friend and away, "I-"

A few loud knocks came on the door, making Naruto roll his sky blue eyes, thinking it was Kiba and Kakashi thinking Naruto had locked the door like he was suppose too.

"It's open!"

Naruto's eyes flicked back to Hinata's, her face tender while she combed her hand through his hair soothingly, "It's fine."

"I think I might-"

"Am I interrupting something, dobe?"

Naruto lifted his head back, giving himself an upside down view of the room, and Sasuke standing in the entryway of.

The blonde tried to roll halfway over, "Sas-" Before rotating a fraction of an inch too far and finding the floor.

Hinata reached out towards the blonde who instantly hopped up - springing in action - and made her snap her hands back.

"Sasuke!" Naruto dusted nothing off of himself while smoothing out imaginary lines.

"Naruto…" Sasuke quirked a delicate brow over the rim of his sunglasses while his eyes were locked in the general direction of the green paste that covered Naruto's face.

A tan hand slowly reached up to press delicate fingers into the paste that was still smeared across his face, causing Naruto's eyes to double in size.

"Give me a minute!"

Sasuke shook his head, "I'll just talk to you tomorrow on the way to school?"

Naruto heard the light question that should have been a statement, and nodded dumbly, his mouth hanging open in trying to figure out something to say.

"You don't want to stay?" Naruto asked quickly.

Sasuke's eyes quickly flicked to Hinata, and then her thigh where Naruto's head and been laying, and then pictured the two of them the way they were when he walked in on them.

The raven shook his head lightly, "No."

Hinata watched as Naruto's face barely pulled out of the smile, the small real signs of happiness leaving his covered features as Sasuke turned and left.

And _that's_ when it hit her.

Naruto was talking about _actually_ liking Sasuke.

"We're home!" Kakashi called a few minutes later, carrying a box of new glasses.

There wasn't going to be another chance to talk about it today.

* * *

Sasuke was parked outside the blonde's house, ready to pick the idiot up for school, and ready to try and face the dobe again.

It was Monday, and Sasuke realized that Monday's with picking up Naruto seemed to be the worst only because they were following something insanely awkward.

This time it was entirely _his_ fault.

The two hadn't said a word to each other, save Sasuke's awkward visit, since Sasuke lost his head and decided to kiss Naruto; who _wasn't_ dressed in drag, and _wasn't_ in front of anyone and came up with the lamest line in known history.

Sasuke sighed, "Just fucking because?"

Naruto made up some hasty excuse about school being over at that point, tripping over his own words and feet and scrambling out the door; school still having two hours till release.

Sasuke, despite all his Uchiha pride and ways, couldn't get over the moment. The raven lost sleep, and would drift during different tasks at hand, and even found himself unable to face the blonde until late Sunday.

Sasuke couldn't so much as pick up the phone and call Naruto, ask him if they could talk it over, because Sasuke knew as many times as he ran the scenario over in his head he knew he couldn't think of anything to say.

When it all boiled down to it, kissing Naruto just felt right.

It felt…prefect.

And explaining that was _impossible_.

Then Sasuke decides to face the inevitable conversation, and there Naruto was; more cozy than ever with Hinata.

The raven could practically hear Naruto's voice in his head declaring he was done dressing up and chasing Sakura. He found his true love.

Sasuke shook his head, "I'm losing it…"

The raven opened the door to his car and climbed out, running his hand down his crooked tie before walking up the walkway to Naruto's house. The walkway was littered with new bushes that Kakashi had stressed over throughout the weekend while making his sweet little Naruto his own personal gardener.

Kakashi wanted the bushes, but that didn't mean he was going to actually plant them.

Yeah, right.

Sasuke approached the door just as Kiba exited his; the teen rushing over to the house and hurtling the line of newly planted bushes with a bright smile.

"Hey Uchiha."

Sasuke turned his head away from the door after knocking, "Hey…"

Kiba was rocking back in forth on the soles of his sneakers, "How goes it?"

"It goes…?"

The door opened quietly, Naruto standing there looking ruffled, his eyes wide, "Come on!"

Kiba rushed past the blonde, flashing a quick smile before disappearing in the living room and his voice pouring out suddenly with excitement.

"Are you alright?" Sasuke dared to ask.

"I lost my fucking paper." Naruto ground out in a manly growl, not matching the girlish look and attire.

"Do you want help looking for it?" Sasuke pushed his glasses atop his head.

"_Yes_," Naruto hissed, "Kakashi isn't helping."

"When does he?"

Naruto chuckled, "Come on."

Sasuke took a step inside the still open door, following the blonde and breathing a little easier at the feeling of it. Whatever it was they did, was back to seeming normal. The two of them getting along and the two of them doing their own thing.

"Hinata-chan!" Naruto whined, causing Sasuke's stomach to clench, "Did you find it?"

The raven ignored the tiny little monster of jealously that was nipping at his heels, roaring angrily at the thought of Naruto and the sweet girl.

Sasuke and Naruto turned to look into the living room, Hinata sitting politely on the couch with a uniform matching Naruto's, and Kiba sitting closely next to her with his hand laced with hers.

"Come on Kiba! Let her help! You help too!" Naruto stomped his bare foot.

Hinata blushed sweetly, while Kiba shrugged as he stood, "Alright, alright."

Kiba held his hand out for the girl who graciously took it, and held onto it even after she was on her feet, and the two went in search for Naruto's paper.

"When did that happen?" Sasuke dared, looking around still for the missing paper.

Naruto snorted, "Sometime this weekend. You should have been here, it was the funniest thing. Hinata was doing his nails, and his hands were sweating like crazy, and his face was turning all blue. He finally just shouted the question out loud and scared her half to death because how loud and unexpected it was. She fell out of her chair."

Sasuke snorted, "Sounds like Kiba."

Naruto chuckled, kneeling down and looking under the sofa while Sasuke walked into the kitchen to almost walk into Kakashi.

"Ah! Sa-kun! It's been so long!"

"It's been a _few_ days."

Kakashi held out the cluster of papers that were held together by a festive looking paper clip, "Here's Naru's paper."

Sasuke's hand took the paper graciously, ready to leave for school now that his worrying was all for nothing, "Thanks."

The raven turned on his heel, walking out of the kitchen and glanced down at the title, '_Confusion'_.

"You found it!" Naruto chirped, taking the paper from Sasuke's hands, "Thanks."

Sasuke nodded dumbly along as Naruto called for his friends.

* * *

"They don't want a ride?" Sasuke clicked his seatbelt in place and started the car.

Naruto shrugged, "They wanted to walk together."

The two rolled their eyes and mumbled together, "Couples."

"Maybe Kiba got something out of those lessons…" Sasuke shoved the car in gear and pulled off from the curb.

Naruto laughed outright, "Yeah, sure. He still acts like an idiot."

Sasuke drove past the couple, Naruto flicking off Kiba and the brunette returning the gesture, only to have Hinata to smack Kiba's arm and for Sasuke to smack Naruto upside the head.

Naruto turned away from the window, rubbing his head with a soft rolling chuckle, "Lighten up!"

Sasuke rolled his eyes, "Che."

Naruto rolled his eyes as well, "Words of wisdom right there."

"Okay…what is your paper on?" Sasuke dared to ask. The opportunity was better than ever.

Naruto peeled his eyes away from the window and the passing scenery with a quick jerky movement, "What?"

"The paper. You know the one you lost this morning. What's it on?"

Naruto swallowed, "Emotions."

"One or all of them?"

Naruto was trying to calculate the distance between the school and where they were at that exact moment, and realized he was probably going to get away with not talking about it.

"Just one."

Okay, so, maybe not.

"Did you get to pick, or was it assigned?"

"Why are you so chatty this morning?" Naruto mumbled.

"I'm aiming towards words of wisdom through conversation. So…"

Naruto cursed his comment, "We were to choose an emotion and write on it with an experience tying to it."

Sasuke pulled into the parking lot and parked his car, glancing over at the blonde as he undid his seatbelt, "What emotion?"

The blonde grinded his teeth, "Confusion."

Sasuke barely pulled off a nonchalant tone, "What are you confused about?"

Naruto sighed, yanking off his seat belt and grabbing for the door handle, "Well…" The blonde rolled his eyes, "You know."

Sasuke snorted, "Actually, no, I don't have mind reading powers. Its one thing I lack. Sorry."

The blonde shrugged his small shoulders, "You."

Sasuke's smirk faded from his lips as he watched Naruto pull on the door handle and step out of the car to wave at Ino and Sakura, who had acted like the locker room incident had never happened.

Sakura had even stopped by over the weekend to apologize in person for everything, and took Naruto and Hinata to meet up with Ino for lunch and an evening of shopping on her.  
Sasuke punched the rim of the steering wheel while Naruto chatted away with the girls, and then pressed the button for the automatic window to graciously roll down.

"Hey, Naru-chan!" Sasuke called as sweetly as he could to dislodge the blonde from the other two.

Naruto turned his head and walked back to the car, leaning his head in, "Hurry up!"

"I'll pick you up after school."

Naruto gave the young Uchiha a questioning look, "Why?"

"Watch your head."

Sasuke pressed the button for the window to raise, Naruto to quickly have his head retreat while he watched Sasuke have the car reverse from the parking spot and then drive out of the parking lot.

Naruto muttered under his breath as the two girls approached him warily, "Shit."

* * *

"Should I even bother asking this time?" Shikamaru graciously lit his cigarette on the way to the back of the parking lot after school.

Sasuke didn't even bother glancing in the teen's direction as they leisurely strolled to where the girls now usually met them; today even Temari was coming.

"Alright. I get this whole 'honeymoon phase' thing now and you dropping me, but you acted like Lord Doom all weekend when we finally had a chance to get away from the women. Today was even worse. Did Itachi lay out your underwear on the front lawn again?"

Sasuke shook his head, "Hn."

"See! Back to the regular old 'I'm going to _grunt_ a response'. Come on."

"Shikamaru, even if I explained the entire situation, it still wouldn't make sense. I'm living it and I don't understand it."

Shikamaru dismissed it, "That's because your hopeless."

Sasuke turned to glare, "It's confusing." Sasuke mentally groaned.

"No shit. It's a woman. It's supposed to be confusing."

Sasuke glanced over at his friend, not noticing the cars that were pulling in the parking lot, "You have _no_ idea."

Shikamaru smiled towards the end of the parking lot where the group of girls had parked, "Well, your headache has arrived."

Sasuke turned to see Naruto marching his way towards him, the rest of the girls getting slowly out of the cars as if scared, and little Hinata looking on worriedly.

Naruto's pigtails were flapping angrily behind him, his heels snapping with each click of his step, and his face was set in the worst scowl his perfect make-up would allow.

Shikamaru let out a low whistle, "What did _you_ do?"

Sasuke hung his head sadly, and sighed out, "I chose the pick of the fucking litter."

Naruto snapped out an angry hand and grabbed hold of a fist full of crisp shirt and tie, "Hey _sweetheart_."

Sasuke didn't even bother sparing a glance at Shikamaru while Naruto ground out the greeting.

"I need to talk to you in privet."

"Then let's just-"

Naruto walked in between the two teen boys, not letting go of his relentless grip on Sasuke's school shirt, and roughly pulled him along with some type of intent that Sasuke wasn't sure of.

He was going to take a wild stab in the dark it was in the area of murder, though.

Naruto pulled Sasuke along, stomping and or marching through the parting sea of students looking too scared to say something about her being rude. The blonde roughly pulled Sasuke up the steps of the school to the front doors of the building and roughly shoved Ino's friend Chouji out of the way with the force of three men, causing the boy to stumble into a wall and drop his bag of chips.

Sasuke looked back at Chouji who had tears pooling in his eyes at the sight of his spilled bag while Naruto pulled him along with an unknown strength, and tried to look impassive as his fellow classmates stared intently with questioning gazes.

"Naruto, you're making a scene!" Sasuke hissed as the blonde still pulled him along.

Naruto didn't bother to respond, and the raven was betting any money he had that Naruto wasn't even listening while he glanced in all the classrooms he passed till he made a sudden left.

Naruto jerked Sasuke behind him, the pale neck of the raven snapping wildly at the quick and sudden motion and course change the blonde made.  
Naruto whipped Sasuke into the vacant classroom, releasing his shirt to let the teen stumble and try to regain his grace and composure after running into a desk.

The blonde snapped the door shut and peeled down the blinds to the room before rounding on Sasuke, "What. In. The. _Fuck_?"

Sasuke snorted, "I was thinking along those same lines."

Naruto sneered, "Don't give me that shit. Here I am fucking watching everything little damnable thing I say and do around you in front of those girls all the way down to how I fucking breathe, and you hung me out to fucking dry this morning."

"Is that what this is about?" Sasuke's eyes shrunk dangerously.

"Yeah, you son-of-a-bitch! I worked my damn ass off to get that fucking bitch to fucking apologize to me, then I did everything but bend her over and kiss her fucking ass to butter her up! So what do you do today? You act like some little bitch!"

"Excuse me?" Sasuke glared, straightening up off the desk he had taken to leaning on.

"Come the fuck on, Uchiha. I tell you I write a fucking paper about your sorry ass and you go all pussy on me. Mr. Fatal-fucking-attraction-Sasuke can't handle the fact that I wrote a paper? Then you drive off, making it look like a scene, and I have the two piranhas breathing down my neck and your fucking pants."

"What the fuck, Naruto!? Do you even know why in the fuck I drove off?"

"Because you can't get the _fuck_ over yourself? Did you even think of what I've had to go through all damn day because of you?"

Sasuke snorted, "Dealt with two girls talking about me. Big damn deal."

Naruto glared, "No you prick. I had to worry _all_ day about what in the fuck I did to you. Change that shit. All weekend-"

"Wait…Is _that_ what this is about?" Sasuke said as he softened his posture.

"This is about a lot of shit. Why haven't you talked to me _all weekend_? Why did you drive off this morning after I told you about my paper?"

And that was when Sasuke chose the worst words in the worst defensive play in his young teenage life.

"Just because." Sasuke shrugged with a defensive glare.

Naruto snorted, "So _that is_ what it's about. You think I wrote my paper on confusion and you because you kissed me?"

Sasuke barely stiffened, "Why in the hell are you getting so worked up about this dobe?"

"So, you want to know about my paper?"

Sasuke sighed exasperatedly, reaching a hand up and pinching the bridge of his nose, "Dobe…"

"No!" Naruto snapped, "My paper was about _confusion_. I _wrote_ that I was obviously confused because I was stuck in an awkward situation. Can you guess _why_?"

"Don't do this, Naruto. Let's just let this go." Sasuke tried to reason in a tired voice.

"_I_-" Naruto stretched, louder now, "Am in an awkward, _confusing,_ situation because I think I feel attracted to someone that I shouldn't be fucking attracted to. I think I feel like if I stop playing fucking dress up, that I won't be needed anymore, and I'll be fucked over. I'm confused because I think if I get the girl, I think I'll be making a mistake because I might _not_ be attracted to her. I'm confused because of these stupid butterflies I keep getting and these stupid fucking thoughts I keep thinking. Just. Fucking. BECAUSE! I'm confused because I think that just maybe I like you, you fucking bastard!"

* * *

Author's Notes: See, I can't be funny all the time. It happens. But you all like it. Admit it.  
Yeah, you guys were fine with me taking a little while longer at the start of the chapter, huh? It won't be forever, I swear. Plus I kind of need a little head rest.


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter Nineteen – Parting Ways to Togetherness

**IMPOARTANT**: _I realized it would be wrong of me to leave you guys dangling off the side of a cliff without an answer (you know…cliff hanger…). Anyway, I wanted to post this, and say I need to take some time 'off' to take some time to write. Does that make sense? I've been paying a lot of attention to this fiction because more people like it than any other. I've been good with having chapters saved up and updating regularly and not having you all want to kill me sweetly. There are many reasons when it boils down to it, but this is long enough as is… SO! Instead of all of this (the fiction) ending badly because I decide to lag or because the plot just dies slowly in a terrible death in seven layers of hell, I hope you will all allow me some time to sit down, think this out, write, and dig myself out of this 20 foot ditch I've found myself in. Thank you. _

Warnings: Cuteness. With a side of melodramatic bullshit and a dash of blonde moments.

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto _nor_ Pearl Jam… how I _love_ Pearl Jam.

Dedication: To Holly, Jen, and Taylor. Thank you all for listening to me vent when I was a step away from flipping my lid and walking away from my haven of writing…and talking some sense into me.

Rating: K+

Chapter Nineteen – Parting Ways to Togetherness

* * *

  
… _I'm confused because_…

… _I think that just maybe_…

… _I like you_…

Blink.

"What?" Sasuke croaked.

Naruto let out a sad, slightly shrill chuckle, "Oh! It's not going to be 'just because', you bastard?"

Sasuke blinked again, slowly, "What?"

"And that's why, Sasuke, I didn't want to fucking tell you about the paper."

Naruto turned sharply on his heel, turned the knob and glared darkly at the group of teen boys who were gathered outside of the classroom before he let out a rather too manly yell for them all to move.

The blonde tugged the door shut with a rough and sharp snap behind him, causing the chalk board and window panes to quiver in protest while Sasuke could hear the sudden burst of boys that were scattering, discussing about what took place.

The King of Academia and The Princess of Madame Francis had a blowout.

Everyone was walking away from the room while Sasuke stood there like a stunned fool after what he was pretty sure was Naruto confessing he liked him.

Or was insanely confused about it.

Blink.

Sasuke scrambled out the classroom and took off down the hall towards the front of the school and the parking lot where he knew Naruto had gone. Sasuke ran into Chouji who was trying to leave the school, a new bag of potato chips knocked out of his hand and onto the floor before the portly boy succumbed to tears. The raven ran through the already closing door and streaked out into the student parking lot to see Naruto walking away with the intent of walking home.

Ino was calling after Naruto while Sakura was running up to Sasuke, actually sounding concerned, "What happened?"

Sasuke tried to shuffle around the girl, keeping his eyes trained on the two blonde's, "Not _now_ Sakura."

Sakura shifted with Sasuke's each step, "You know, Sasuke-kun…"

Sasuke watched as Naruto stormed off passed Ino with Hinata calling after him, and of course, with black streaks down his face.

Sasuke cursed, "Sakura! Not. Right. Now!"

"I just thought you should let her calm down. You and I could just-"

"Temari! Come get her!" Sasuke yelled as he tried to shuffle around her again.

Temari and Shikamaru exchanged uneasy glances before the girl came forward and held one of Sakura's shoulders gingerly just enough for Sasuke to fly by.

But Sasuke's running steps became uneasy paces when he realized Naruto was far out of sight by then.

Shikamaru rested a light hand on Sasuke's shoulder, "Give her a little time. Let her cool down and let yourself get your head on straight. Rational is what we want."

Sasuke's eyes flicked to the teen that was standing next to him, before he shook off his hand and marched to his car. Sasuke struggled with the door handle before he finally unlocked the car after the alarm started screaming in protest, and the raven climbed in. Sasuke started the car and thought for a fraction of a second before driving off.

* * *

The blonde had taken off towards his house at full speed after taking off his heels simply because he had learned his lesson after running to school. Naruto took off through manicured backyards, jumped over tall fences, and even dodged a rather angry dog so he could avoid the road and sidewalk.

Once Naruto finally reached his house and tried to storm inside before discovering the front door was locked - because he ran right into it - he realized he would have to use his house key for what had to be the fourth time in history.

Naruto limply dropped his bag next to the door with his shoes, and quickly turned to lock the door before Hinata or Kiba would show up like he knew they would.

Kiba would get there first because Hinata would have most likely called. But Naruto could already picture Ino driving Hinata towards his house, it wouldn't be that much of a difference.  
Kakashi had left a note sweetly on the table by the front door that Naruto had almost missed if he hadn't been catching his breath.  
_  
Na-Na,  
I had to meet up with Ji-Ji-san. I'm sorry. I left you a present in your room._  
~_Dad_

Naruto sighed thankfully. Usually happy to see his father despite the teasing, he knew something negative would happen if Kakashi saw him like this. Naruto could still feel the random stray tears leak despite how much he tried to fight them off, and every time he wiped at his face, a black smudge would be sitting on his fingertips.

Naruto barely made it down to his room at his sluggish, depressed pace. Naruto didn't even manage to change fully, and just decided to change out of the outfit he grew to hate with his entire being and simply put on a pair of boxers that he grabbed off his floor.

Naruto ignored the knocks that came from his front door not a second after that, which quickly turned into resounding thuds, which were followed by Kiba's voice.

"Blondie! Open the door!" Kiba shouted, "Now, damn you!"

Naruto shuffled over to his bed to what he suspected was the gift his father left him, and opened the plastic bag with less enthusiasm than he usually held for free things.  
Naruto peeked inside to find holders for picture prints, and easily reached in the bag to retrieve them once the banging on the front door stopped. He knew he would have to thank Hinata later for letting him get a moment to himself.

A moment to think.

A moment to curse himself to hell for having a dumb outburst.

Kakashi had a tendency to take too many pictures on his digital camera before taking the card to the store and getting prints to fill the photo albums. Naruto didn't know why he was giving them to him.

Naruto flipped open the little package and took out of stack of photos to have the first one scream at him.

It was Sasuke and him kissing.

Naruto tossed the stack in the air with a yell that was strained through his teeth before he stalked out of his room to roam back into the living room.

The blonde yanked the curtains shut before Kiba had a chance to bang on the windows and shout at him whenever he decided to wonder back over and Hinata couldn't stop him, and just for the sake of it, Naruto double checked the lock on the front door.

Naruto shuffled to the couch before flopping down, not bothering to turn on the television for company. He needed to think or sulk. They were the same thing.

Just as Naruto stared off at nothing to try and think things over and through – a nice two seconds of peace had passed – his phone started a rhythmic and upbeat melody that made his heartbeat skip. Naruto turned his head with a quick snap towards his abandoned bag next to the door, still listening to the tone play and the vocalist sing passionately.

Sasuke was calling.

Naruto kept staring towards his abandoned bag, waiting for the music to cut, and waiting for Sasuke's personal ring tone to cut off.

And thankfully it did.

The blonde let out a sigh of relief before he slumped back into the cushions, not realizing he had sat bolt upright and jolted forward, but easily repeated the action when his phone started singing sweetly again.

Naruto stood from the couch and shuffled to his bag, eyeing it carefully before the music died again, and the blonde deemed it safe to dig the phone out of his bag.

The phone's melody picked up again, the phone dancing wildly with rhythmic vibration, and Naruto suddenly scared to the point he yelled and almost dropped the phone.

Sasuke's scowling face was flashing across the small screen, and Naruto remembered it was the only time he had managed to get a picture of him. It cost him three jabs, to swats upside the head, and one swift kick to the ass.

But it was worth it.

The phone continued to sing while it danced in his hands in a hopeful type of way before Naruto sighed and picked up the phone.

"_Dobe, if you hang up, I'll kill you_." Sasuke instantly threatened.

It didn't take long for Sasuke to drive off whatever it was he was feeling and pick up his phone.

Naruto resisted the urge to hang the damn phone up and chuck it out the window, and simply sighed, "What?"

"_Open the door_."

And drive over to Naruto's house.

Naruto blinked. "Excuse me?"

"_Open. The. Door_."

"No." Naruto stated defiantly.

He needed time to think, time to process, and most of all time to beat himself up over such a stupid outburst. Naruto grinded his teeth because that was the most girlish thing he thought yet.

"_Naruto, just please open the door_." Sasuke's voice lightly pleaded.

And despite himself, Naruto was reaching for the door, "Alright Sasuke, "I'm opening the fucking door."

"_Thank you_."

"Wow, Uchiha. That had to be history in the making right there, saying thank you." Naruto pulled the door open after wrestling with the locks.

Sasuke stared at Naruto through the tint of his sunglasses and the clear glass of the door, and despite knowing he should hang up the phone, he just kept talking through it.

"_Wow, Uzumaki. This has to be history repeating itself with you in my clothes and all_."

Naruto pulled his phone away from his ear and braved a glance down at his lower half to discover he was indeed, in Sasuke's boxers. The same pair that was given to him the day Sasuke decided to up and kiss him.

Naruto looked back up at Sasuke and immediately slammed the door shut, and slid the locks back in place; barely registering Sasuke's cursing on the other end of the line.

"Shit! Shit, shit, shit…_FUCK!_" Naruto yelled as he sprinted down the hallway to his room with the phone still in hand, the call still connected, and one young Uchiha still listening only half-amused.

Sasuke sighed as he heard Naruto distractedly throw the phone down while his flustered curses continued, and listened while the blonde practically ripped open the drawer to his dresser. The raven heard Naruto stumble as he wrestled the boxers off, and then the inevitable crash when the blonde fell.

Sasuke pinched the bridge of his nose as he started counting to give Naruto barely more time to become calm. "One, Two, Three…"

The raven heard Naruto stumble around the room, and he listened as he opened another drawer and heard the rustle of another article of clothes.

"Seventeen, Eighteen, Nineteen…"

Naruto let out a rumbling set of curses, and Sasuke was guessing he tried to shove his head through the arm hole of a shirt or put his pants on backwards.

"Thirty."

Sasuke stepped off the front step to a familiar path around the side of the house; familiar because it was burned in his brain as the most embarrassing moment of his life.

Then again, all his embarrassing moments stemmed from some moment with Naruto.

The raven shuffled through the grass that was a little too tall and crying out for a trim as he counted windows while he still listened to Naruto's foul mouth curse on the other end of the phone.

Sasuke counted the windows as he heard Naruto's scuttling settle to some extent, but he had some type of inkling that the dobe was going to be trying to barricade himself in his room soon.

Sasuke faced Naruto's window and knocked politely on the glass pane, the suns glare preventing his eyes access to the room, but his ear to his phone heard Naruto turn quickly and fall.

Sasuke sighed.

"_Naruto…Hey! DOBE!_" Sasuke screamed into the phone which echoed from outside.

Sasuke intently listened as he heard Naruto openly question the noise before the blonde groaned after most likely eyeing his phone.

There was a brief rustling, "Sasuke…?"

The raven held in his sigh of relief, "_Come open the window_."

Naruto eyed his window to see Sasuke's head, his cell phone firmly glued to his ear, and the blonde could tell he was glaring.

"First my front door, now my window? What's next?"

"_I break them down._"

Naruto was instantly reminded of the Big Bad Wolf and wondered if he looked like a scared little pig in a straw house with nowhere to run too.

The blonde didn't send Sasuke away though, his bare feet pattered against the floor till he reached the window before he firmly placed the phone uncomfortably between his ear and his shoulder.

Naruto wrestled with the lock on his window, mumbling more curses till he finally broke the damn thing, and then threw the window open closely followed by the screen.

The blonde felt his heart drum erratically as he watched Sasuke take off his sunglasses and hang up his cell phone before silently handing the objects to the blonde, the two sharing the briefest of touches that lingered longer than it should as they passed the objects along.

Then Naruto instantly felt comforted.

"Stand back a little." Sasuke said, the raven sighing in relief that the dobe was dressed fully.

Naruto took a few steps back and threw Sasuke's things on the bed before he watched the raven not-so-gracefully climb through the window.

Naruto finally had something to prove his point – the bastard couldn't be perfect all the time.

Sasuke sloppily threw his hands over the window ceil and dug his school shoes onto the side of the house before propelling himself inside and through Naruto's window only to land on his stomach.

The raven immediately popped up, giving the blonde a daring look as if to question that it happened.

"Why are you here?" Naruto finally decided to ask.

"Should I not be?" Sasuke gave the blonde a dumbfounded look, "We need to talk."

"About what I said…" Naruto tried to start.

"Why did you say it?" Sasuke interrupted.

Naruto flushed before he slumped down onto his bed, "Maybe because it's the truth? Maybe because this situation – this act – is getting confusing? I don't know! It's hard to sort out! I just know you made it clear that whatever it is I'm feeling you can't return-"

"What?"

Naruto gave Sasuke a skeptical look, "Oh, come on. I drive you nuts. I grind on your damn nerves. And you can't stand to be around me."

Sasuke rolled his midnight eyes with an exasperated sigh, "That's really what you think?"

Naruto nodded as he inspected the floor, his eyes roaming around and avoiding the scattered pictures. If he knew _exactly_ what these feelings were, he knew Sasuke couldn't return them.

"You drive me nuts when you say dumb shit like that, Naruto. Did you forget that _I_ _kissed you_ without the make-up and girl get-up?"

Naruto's sky-blue eyes flicked up from inspecting the floor just as Sasuke walked over and slumped on the bed himself with a long sigh.

Naruto got it.

He was confused too.

Naruto's eyes flicked over to see Sasuke staring out the open window in what seemed like a daze, "So…"

Midnight eyes snapped over to meet blue before Naruto pulled his eyes away, "Just take some time to think it over, dobe. _We_ really need to. Besides, we don't want you to smash the pea."

Naruto glared at the wall he had taken to staring at trying to hide a growing grin.

It was nice to see that Sasuke could still make dumb jokes despite the awkward air.

Silence is uncomfortable, but always simply fixed.

Naruto eventually, blindly, reached over and shoved Sasuke lightly to let the teen teeter back and bump shoulders with him more roughly than it should have happened; Sasuke smirking underneath his bangs. Naruto didn't even hesitate before shoving him back roughly, and jumping up when Sasuke's limp body came swinging back to fall down.

The blonde did a flying leap onto the unsuspecting body, which earned a loud groan to echo through the house, before he flipped Naruto off of him with ease; and the two just simply laughed to the point of tears, each laughing because the other, from the other.

And then they laid there, side by side, just talking.

It was an amazing thing, really. Talking about nothing that meant absolutely everything.

They found out little things about each other that afternoon.

How Naruto was irritated with his Math teacher about his grades, and how Sasuke was tired of hearing Shikamaru snore behind him in every class. Naruto expressed his sorrows for his favorite television reality show being canceled, and Sasuke expressed his joy for less crap on television.

How Naruto thought his dad's cooking was lacking, and Sasuke found out his brother's cooking turned out to be cheep take-out. Naruto whined about wanting to go on vacation because he'd only been once, Sasuke gave Naruto a pained look because he'd been too many times.

They were completely different, but exactly the same.

Sasuke would watch Naruto's hands move around in the air about them animatedly when he would talk about something he was excited about, and if he turned to look at him, he'd always make different faces with a certain fire in his eyes. Sasuke never made gestures really, unless he showed off his middle finger to Itachi or Naruto. And Sasuke only had three facial expressions; scowling, smirking, and a blank one with one eyebrow rose.

He just wouldn't admit Naruto introduced new ones; mostly it just consisted of smiling.

Naruto noticed that Sasuke had more grunts than humanly possible, but if you mentioned something he loathed, or found something he secretly liked, he had a tendency to ramble. Naruto knew he himself just rambled on in general, but if he was tired, now there was some grunting.

Sasuke talked about how he did most of the cooking at home, and he didn't mind because he actually liked too. Naruto couldn't cook – that simple. Sasuke wasn't a morning person - it just didn't work for him. Naruto was energetic, so he was just naturally up and ready…usually. The raven hated being Senior Class President when Shikamaru roped him into it in the first place. Naruto was never involved in the student council crap and laughed at Sasuke when he explained everything he had to do.

Naruto said he secretly liked the pampering thing that the girls do. Sasuke said Itachi used to feed him facial cream when he was little, so now it just freaks him out. Naruto has a passion for reading most books all the time. Sasuke could read only to fall asleep or for school. Naruto and his father are best friends underneath all the parenting and teasing. Sasuke said that Itachi and himself actually act like civil human beings when no one was watching, and when no one was around, they would act like brothers and best friends.

Sasuke would smirk when Naruto scowled, because it was so different.

Naruto would chuckle when Sasuke would laugh, because it was beautifully contagious.

The two of them would smile when the other did so, because the other couldn't help it despite how much they tried to fight it or hide it.

And the two eventually loosely held hands as they carried on in conversation, because when Naruto bumped Sasuke's on accident, it just seemed like the perfect thing for them to do.

* * *

Author's Notes: -chuckles- Sasuke really kinda is a stalker, threatening to break in and all. He's just persistent. XD  
-looks up- Look at that… Nevi is bringing in the romance.  
Before you all _jump._ **They aren't together yet. **I'm actually _rushing_ that part now.  
Before everyone asks me what the ring tone was, I imagined it was that Pearl Jam song called 'Save You'. So…I would look up Parting Ways (part of the title) and Save You….the lyrics…they're very befitting.


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter Twenty** – The Second Fall

Author's Notes (a long one): _I want to start off by saying __**thank you**__ for giving me time to sit back and write and work some kinks out that I had banged in there. I got to sit back and think out the plot that I had seemingly forgotten, and until I need to (hopefully not) take another break, I have a few chapters for you all. This is being posted a day early simply because you all deserve it. To be damn honest… I'm nervous about posting this. So…. Here you are, chapter 20._

Dedication: To everyone who kept me going through this really hard time, you know who are, and I thank you.

The Author's note at the end of the page is in concerns with the feelings in this chapter and you all not yelling at me for what I wrote. Please try and read it. –pouts-

**Chapter Twenty** – The Second Fall

* * *

Naruto didn't remember when he exactly fell asleep.

He remembered Sasuke staying for dinner without Kakashi trying to convince him. Kiba made his way back over not a minute after they finished eating. Naruto and Kiba went about playing video games while Sasuke and Hinata laughed every time someone was blamed for a careless death.

Everyone leaving was a blur.

Kiba punching his arm lightly like usual, but still managing that 'we're going to talk about this' look. Hinata giving him a gentle hug, and managing to pull back to give him a 'we're going to talk about this when you're ready' look. Sasuke walked out the door, turning to give Naruto a simple nod that said '_we'll_ talk about it whenever _we're_ ready'.

So many looks.

Then, his alarm clock was screaming at him, telling him it was another day, and he was still having the same dream from a week ago since everything happened with Sasuke.

Naruto's bedroom door was slammed open, Kakashi's arms full of beauty products, "Hel-_looo~_! Rise and beatify!"

Naruto looked over at his clock, the red numbers burning into his eyes at the early morning hour, "Five…"

Kakashi smiled at the cracked voice and the mess of hair that he usually thought couldn't get messier, and the dazed look of a lost puppy always won him over.

"Yes, Na-kun. Like usual."

Naruto grumbled, his face pulled in complete confusion and loss while throwing his hand on top his head and rubbing his hair to make it frizzy, "Just…Ramen…English…Book on CD…?"

The older of the two sighed before dropping the products on Naruto's dresser and handing off an energy drink that he would soon regret giving him.

Because Sasuke had to deal with him when it would kick in, and he didn't want to hear him complain.

Naruto made a sour face as he sipped the drink, eyeing his dad while he threw the covers off of him.

Naruto pulled the drink away, "What?"

Kakashi was giving him a wistful look, "Nothing. Get in your chair."

The blonde slid out of bed onto his unsteady feet before wobbling and waddling the short two feet to the computer chair.

The comfortable, cushiony computer chair Kakashi had bought and put in his room for those long weekday mornings when his father did his hair and make-up.  
Naruto flopped in the chair and slid his feet in his bright orange fuzzy slippers before tucking his legs underneath himself and settling into the chair.

"So, Na-kun…when did you and Sasu-chan finally start getting along?" Kakashi ran a brush through his son's hair gently with a hidden smile.

The blonde took the can away from his lips, his eyes wider than they should have been for five in the morning. Naruto simply shrugged as he nibbled on his bottom lip.

"It's nice…that's all." Kakashi said simply as he began putting Naruto's hair down strategically.

"What? That we're getting along?"

Okay, so, Naruto's tired and fogged brain set him up for that one.

"Well, yes. It's nice to see you enjoying his company and vise-versa."

Naruto choked on the next mouth full of drink he attempted to swallow and began coughing wildly, while Kakashi sweetly patted his back with a light smile.

"What…" Naruto swallowed a cough, "Makes you think I enjoy his company?"

Kakashi shrugged, placing another pin carelessly in his son's hair, "You smile now, when you come home from school; come to think of it, all the time. Before," Kakashi reached around and ran a finger over Naruto's forehead where worry lines usually graced his features, "You just look worried."

"Well…How do you know it's not because of Sakura-chan?" Naruto unconsciously ran his hand over his forehead and then to the corner of his lips that was just slightly pulled up.

Naruto simply walked into that one though, because Kakashi set him up for it.

"Ah! That's easy. You never talk about her, only Sa-kun."

The blonde mouthed a few unsaid curses before continuing on, "I don't talk about him that-"

"Na-kun, I'm your father, I notice these things." Kakashi said simply.

The blonde grumbled under his breath, as he crossed his arms messily and dripped a little drink on his sleep shirt, "Do you have to notice everything?"

Naruto heard his father sigh before he heard the hair brush get set down with a quiet tapping noise, and a set of little clatters signaled the pins being gently placed down too.

Kakashi appeared in front of his son and squatted down to his level to give him a serious look, "Of course I do. But Naruto, I beg you, don't let him go now."

"And why is that dad?" Naruto scowled, trying to cover the embarrassment. "I get you like him and his bastardly ways and all, but if I kill him, you really won't notice."

Kakashi smiled sweetly, "Not even that. You're at the best part of this entire thing."

"What?"

"Figuring out everything can be tiring, and you've been thinking this over for an entire week. But falling, Naruto, is worth it all, don't give up now." Kakashi whispered with a wink.

* * *

Sasuke walked down the long stretch of sidewalk, his hands shoved in his pockets, and an unconscious smile placed on his lips.

The smile had been there all week, and no scowl or being an Ice Prick extraordinaire could remove it with Naruto in mind.

Not to mention he was now left alone at his school because everyone thought his girlfriend would murder them.

The raven watched as Kiba exited his house, his head darting to where Sasuke's car was usually impatiently parked before glancing around and catching sight of him.

Sasuke's small smile instantly faded.

Shit.

Kiba instantly turned and walked towards him, securing his bag more comfortably on his shoulder before picking up his pace and approaching with some sort of unseen intent.

The young Uchiha decided to stop his casual pace and just get situated where he stood for most likely some awkward and unforeseen conversation that would brand the word _mortified_ on his skin once more.

Then Sasuke thought about it as the teen approached, and realized the conversation could go several different types of ways.

That was just how Kiba was.

Kiba was closer to the boy now, his steps faltering slightly, and his face inspecting the ground as he watched his feet drag.

Sasuke cleared his throat, "I hope you don't mind Naruto and I walking with you and Hinata today. It's getting warm enough to do this and consider it sane."

Not to mention Sasuke found it amusing to watch Kiba sprint back towards school to get there on time.

Kiba shook his head as he finally stood his ground, "She'd like that."

Sasuke's eye barely twitched, "And let me guess, you wouldn't?"

"Not really. But she adores Naruto."

Sasuke glared through the tint of his glasses, he knew Kiba didn't like it because Kiba didn't like him, "And you're fine with that?"

Kiba looked up from inspecting the ground to give the Uchiha a perplexed look, "Yeah, why not? She said it's like having a brother…a very weird brother."

The raven clenched his jaw to hopefully will away the incessant jealousy that kept plaguing him, "Alright, what did you need?"

"Don't hurt him."

Sasuke opened his mouth to say something back, a retort of some form, or maybe question what Kiba was saying even though he understood it clearly enough.

"I see it, alright." Kiba's eyes softened as his hand went to ruffling his hair uncomfortably.

"See – what…I don't-"

"I can deal with him swinging whatever way it is he is swinging...jokes aside. I've got past it to a certain extent – alright. No – scratch that – I can be happy for him because that's what best friends do; we stand by each other through _everything_. But, I see it just as much with you, you _actually_ liking him."

"What in the world _makes_ you think that I-" Sasuke tried to start with a defensive tone.

"Oh come on, Uchiha. Those looks you two share without even noticing, the way you look at him when you think no one is looking, and the way the _both_ of you smile like fucking jackasses around each other." Kiba stopped and ran a frustrated and uncomfortable hand through his hair.

Kiba only noticed now because he and Hinata were like that.

"Kiba-"

"All I know is if you lead him on and hurt him, I will fucking kill you."

Sasuke blinked.

There were so many firsts happening since he had waltzed confidently into Naruto's life.

"I'm not-"

"Sasuke, everyone can tell you're falling for him."

* * *

Naruto sat on the couch with Hinata, listening to her chat away politely about a dinner with Kiba and his mother. The blonde's eyes would flick back and forth from the clock back to her warm face, back to his bouncing leg, and then back to the door.

"Naruto…" Hinata began lightly.

"Hm?" Naruto ripped his eyes away from the door to be greeted by a softened gaze of gray.

"You should tell him."

Naruto opened his mouth to question her, ask what she was going on about even though he knew exactly what it was she was talking about.

"Or was that what you fought about earlier this week?" Her eyes squinted in question for the briefest of moments, as if trying to read him.

"I think…"

"I think you should tell him. Don't fall by yourself when you can fall together." Hinata said with a wise smile.

Naruto swallowed audibly before the front door swung open, and Kiba let himself in like he owned the place.

The blonde turned away from where he sat, the startled look disappearing while Kiba flopped down next to Hinata and began talking about something meaningless. Naruto turned towards the doorway when he heard a calm set of feet entering leisurely, and looked up to see Sasuke stripping himself of his sunglasses.

Naruto tried to force the flaming blush out of his face, the heat in his face making him tempted to fan; he would have done it if it wasn't do damn girly or in front of Sasuke.

Why did Hinata have to say that _now_?

The raven looked over at Naruto who was looking down at his lap while Hinata was expressing her joys of cooking dinner with Kiba's mother and her frustrations with playing a video game with Kiba.

Sasuke took in a large intake of breath and forced himself to look away from Naruto and study anything but, his face trying to desperately flush with the information Kiba presented him with; the information he had been trying to deny.

And not to mention the information his brother brought up on several occasions as the week wore on.

Naruto was fighting with himself to push past the feelings and act normal around Sasuke; ignore the screamingly large piece of information Hinata and Kakashi saw clearly but he tried to wave off dismissively.

Sasuke decided to turn to chance a glance at Naruto just as the blonde was looking up from underneath his bangs, leaving the two turning away and smacking their foreheads simultaneously.

Sasuke grumbled.

Naruto mumbled.

It was something they tried to avoid, something they tried to ignore, and something they tried to deny to the fullest extent.

It was past impossible now.

They couldn't deny any longer that they were falling in love.

* * *

Kiba and Hinata walked in front of Sasuke and Naruto at the end of the day, their hands laced together, and Kiba going on and on about an absurdly hard test.  
Naruto still couldn't believe he came all the way to Academia just to pick up Hinata.

The blonde was watching his feet shuffling along, running over the day's events carefully while Sasuke walked next to him mimicking killing himself while Kiba rambled on.

The walk in the morning was beyond awkward.

Naruto could get past the falling in love part – to some extent – …Okay, so that was a lie.

The fact that the blonde had been putting all feelings on the back burner when it came to Sasuke was working for him, but it was as if they doubled since they were left to stew so he could think them over. He knew they were there, understood that they were lingering over his head simply by the fact that he fought with them and denied them on a daily basis.

He had _no_ idea he let them get this far.

So now, to add to the awkwardness of his day, he just had to remember at the worst possible moment what he and Sasuke had both said about people walking together.  
_  
Couples_.

The blonde groaned mentally.

Technically, he should be used to it. He was pretending to be Sasuke's girlfriend after all, but this put a new definition to awkward situations.

He snapped at Sakura seven times – that's right he counted – that day. Each time was for something small, but everything eventually ended at the reasoning of Sasuke. Naruto didn't even bother talking to Ino anymore, and he felt like he was on the teetering edge of those things when it came to Sakura.

Because when it boiled down to it, he couldn't stand to be around her when she talked about Sasuke.

Naruto mentally smacked himself.  
_  
Then_ Naruto had to have something wrong with him, because he spent the entire day focused on Sasuke.

He drifted in class thinking of his smile, got hit in the face by a dodge ball in gym remembering the certain ring in his rare laughter, and blushed like an insane asshole the rest of the day when he thought about all the times Sasuke kissed him.

Then, Naruto decided to look like an crazed fool for the better part of the last period while he continued to beat his head on his desk when he remembered the last very important detail to everything.

He wasn't sure what Sasuke was thinking about everything.

The bastard was confused too.

For all Naruto knew, Sasuke was up and done with everything before they got too caught up in whatever it was that they had going on.  
Naruto's tan hand unconsciously found his forehead and rubbed the sore spot gently, trying to will away the pain and over thinking.

They promised they'd talk about it.

When _they_ were ready.

"Shit." Naruto cursed under his breath.

Sasuke spared a glance at the forever spacing blonde, "Did you twist your ankle again?"

"Huh?" Naruto turned to face Sasuke, tripping a little over his feet.

Sasuke frowned slightly, wondering if Naruto thought everything over to the negative point of things; their whole thing that they had built up would be put to an end.

Or if Kiba might have been right and the blonde felt the same way.

Sasuke understood that he was feeling _something_ for Naruto for awhile; somewhere in between finding someone that returned his bullshit with snappy retorts and a mean right hook, and most likely when Kakashi pointed it out. Yet, Sasuke was really enjoying being in denial.

It was easier.

Falling or being in love was difficult, or really, he suspected. It sounded like a headache with everything that went into it, but things had happened so damn naturally with Naruto, everyone else was pointing it out to him because the great Sasuke Uchiha couldn't tell he was in the midsts of falling for someone.

Everything had been itching at him all day, and the drifting earned him a detention.

"Stop being spacey. You're looking more blonde than you should."

Naruto glared and tripped lightly over his feet again.

"Okay, please, just pay attention to you feet." Sasuke hid the light worry in his voice perfectly.

Sasuke lightly latched his right hand onto Naruto's free swinging left hand with a clench of his jaw and pulled the blonde closer before letting his hand go and dropping his arm around Naruto's shoulders, Sauske's hand gripping one shoulder lightly.

"Teme," Naruto said threw clenched teeth, eyeing Kiba and Hinata who weren't paying attention, while he growled with a false threat, "What are-"

"Let's keep the falling to a minimum, Naruto."

Naruto chuckled under his breath before hesitantly wrapping his left hand around Sasuke's waist gently and silently walked in peace.

As much peace as they could get with Naruto stumbling and Hinata giggling joyfully.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Naruto dropped his bag inside the door and Sasuke followed suit, the two of them slipping off their shoes. The blonde excused himself to change into normal clothes while Sasuke went to sit on the couch; Hinata and Kiba next door, Kiba trying to teach Hinata how to play another video game.

Code for: They were giving them privacy.

Kakashi had left another note saying he had gone shopping and he would be home for dinner, and left a sweet little side note asking Sasuke to join them once more.  
Naruto walked back into the room, looking as if he was swallowed whole by the clothes he was wearing; the sweat pants baggy and the t-shirt two sizes too big.

And of course, half removed make-up.

Sasuke chuckled under his breath before easily covering it up with a sigh, and quickly standing up from the couch and approaching Naruto. The blonde stopped his steps, silently watching each of the other teens steps before Sasuke grabbed a tan slender wrist and dragged Naruto into the kitchen with light laughter.

"What's so funny?" The blonde asked indignantly.

Sasuke let his hand fall away before pointing to the stool that Kakashi often occupied and busied himself at the sink with getting a warm, wet rag.

Naruto hopped up on the stool with an easy skip and folded his hands in between in legs almost playfully while he let his fingers wrestle and tangle together in nervousness.  
The young Uchiha turned away from the sink and approached the blonde with an impassive face, his steps careful and easy and calculating.

He was still waiting for the blonde to just call everything quits.

Naruto removed his hands from in between his legs and let them rest on his thighs just and Sasuke smoothly walked in between his legs to come face to face with him.  
Naruto felt his breath hitch when he felt Sasuke's mint breath coast on his felt; cool and warm at the same time with a hint of sweetness that he rarely seemed to possess.

Aquamarine eyes locked gently with a midnight sky gaze, and they evenly held the stare just as Naruto felt the warmth of the wet rag hit his tan flushed face.

"Say Sasuke…?"

The blonde watched as Sasuke's eyes drifted lightly over his face after disconnecting with their light lock; not following the rag where it was cleaning up the mess the blonde had left behind.

Midnight eyes flicked back to summer sky blue for a second as he questioned in return, "What?"

The blonde watched again as the raven carefully looked over his tan face, concentrating hard to be sure not to blush while choosing the right words.

"I-I was just…sort of wondering…you know. Did you think it over?" Naruto paused when Sasuke stopped wiping at his face, "I swear I didn't smash the pea."

Naruto smiled when he felt Sasuke's breath tickle his face again from a small laugh while catching the sent once more of a sweet mint.

The raven shifted his gaze to the counter that sat directly behind Naruto, the pale hand that was clutching the wash cloth set the said thing down before running a hand through the blonde's hair.

He might, maybe one day in a mumble, tell Naruto how much he liked his hair. The color – that reflecting the sun, the feel – that envious of clouds, and the smell – better than any field of flowers on any spring day.

With less words and not as eloquent, he was damn sure he could fit it in as a grunt.

For now, he enjoyed springing the teen's hair back to life having been matted down by the dastardly wig that hid something so perfect.

"I was thinking something along the lines…Of dropping the pretend." Sasuke clenched his jaw in waiting for the blonde to respond.

With how Naruto was letting him touch his hair and clean his face, he shouldn't have been so surprised by the reaction.

Naruto's face lit completely with just a small smile that crinkled the corners of his eyes that were locked onto Sasuke's face, barely showing pearly white teeth that had a piece of chocolate on it, and easily becoming contagious to the teen opposite of him.

Sasuke slid his hand completely to the back of the blonde's head while he rested the other on Naruto's knee and pulled the teen forward gently, the two letting their eyes slid shut just as their lips locked with a sweet and gentle pressure.

Falling isn't always bad.

* * *

Author's Notes:  
I know you all are like, "Wait, I thought they were figuring out their feelings?"  
It was more of _denial_. They knew feelings were there and they kept trying to deny them, and now they are very aware of them because it's a little past impossible to deny them, but are worried about admitting it because it's not fully , before everyone yells, I hope they realize the difference between falling in love and being in love. It's one hell of a step.  
And maybe one day I'll write a chapter on the entire week that I skipped. XD  
So thank you all. Read, review, enjoy.


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter 21: From Best to Bullshit

Author's Notes: _Everyone has been asking why don't I take him out of the girly-girl clothes and call it a day. Because… it's part of the plot. And I think you'll catch it now.  
-Twitch- who can guess which was the scene I hated writing the most?__**IMPORTANT:**__ As I am (as of now) writing later chapters, I wanted to warn you that…despite what I haven't tried at all to avoid because I didn't give a damn to do an outline… the fiction is headed towards drama. So… It's like a Romance/Drama/Comedy/General/Bullshit? Something like that. Flames, complaints, and lemon 'grumbles, mumbles, wishing and begging' will be tossed and laughed at.  
_  
**Dedication:** Jen (my night muse) - for lifting up that writer's block when it was surely about to crush my head, inspiring me when I surely thought it was past impossible, and laughing like an idiot with me at ridiculous hours in the morning while trying to write this headache of a chapter.

Chapter 21: From Best to Bullshit

"Why can't a woman be more like a man?" - My Fair Lady  
"Because surgery is too expensive." – Tim Allen  
- From Home Improvement

(Editing has been done in a half-assed fashion due to my monthly visit from hell.)

* * *

Kakashi didn't mean to ruin the kiss, he really didn't, but he couldn't help to squeal out and clap his hands together excitedly.

His son never cared for anyone this much.

That led to the two jumping out of their skins and bumping their foreheads.

The smacking of heads ended up leaving Naruto to pull back from the banging so quickly he fell off the stool with a crunching thud and a loud groan. Sasuke, on the other hand, blushed more fiercely than he really thought humanly possible for a Uchiha.

Naruto and Sasuke soon found themselves sitting at the dinner table, listening to Kakashi ramble on about their possible first date all the way to their wedding day until Kiba thankfully came over and crashed what was most likely spinning into the most awkward and embarrassing day in known history.

Kiba grabbed Naruto and dragged him off outside, saying something about 'best friend time' and rambling off nonsense that made everyone throw questioning looks before they slowly started doing something.

Kakashi cleaned off the table after declining help from Hinata and Sasuke and left the two to be stuck in awkward but polite conversation in the living room.

Kiba looked over at his best friend who sat down on the cement steps where they usually sat talking into the long hours of the night till Kiba's mom barked at him about school hours and homework.

"So…"

Naruto peaked out of the corner of his eyes, "So…"

"First, I want to know why you were upset the other day." Kiba began as he crossed his arms over his bent knees.

The blonde turned his head and blinked his eyes relentlessly after his long bangs prodded his eyes, "You're still hung up on that?."

"Because you have yet to explain…_Best. Friend._"

Naruto reached a hand up to the back of his head and ruffled his blonde spikes in an uncomfortable manner, "It's something you wouldn't want to talk about…"

Kiba gave the blonde an impatient look, "Naruto, just shut up and talk."

Naruto chuckled at the obviously impossible statement, but understood the meaning behind it anyway. "I was pissed. I haven't been that mad since …I don't even know. I was pissed. He let me stew all day and think of every small little thing he ever did, so it just compacted it all."

Kiba grimaced before he grinned at the fond memory of the week that followed that. It had been such a peaceful week.

"I got so caught up in being pissed at him, I forgot about controlling what I say." Naruto rolled his eyes while he chuckled.

"One of your famous outbursts?"

Naruto snorted before swiping his hand down his face, "Yeah…sort of."

"So now that you've won over the Ice Prince instead of the Bitch Princess, what are you going to do now? When are you going to quit playing school girl? I know dodge ball about killed Hinata _and_ you."

Naruto was thankful that they had an unspoken agreement not to talk about some things; like feelings and the developmental relationships unless it was completely necessary. It was always nice to jump over certain aspects that were going on so he didn't have to listen to Kiba's comments.

Naruto shot his friend a light glare, "Dress in the clothes I'm put in, and then you try and play – alright. And I don't know when I can quit."

"Why?"

"What…Sasuke's girlfriend up and leaves and then he starts dating a guy?...Are you alright?"

Kiba was visibly wincing after every few words Naruto spoke, before he started chuckling off the embarrassment, and not to mention the fact that Naruto was already laughing.

"Is it always going to be this bad?" Naruto finally asked with a long sigh.

"Remember in _Harry Potter_ how everyone winced and jumped and acted like assholes when some brave bastard said _Voldemort_?" Kiba questioned as he rubbed the back of his neck.

Naruto nodded with a moronic and goofy smile gracing his features, "Yeah."

"And remember how eventually, some people got a little bold and could say it?"

Naruto snickered, "Yeah."

"I'm not going to be like that."

Sasuke and Hinata walked outside just as the two fell against each other from the force of their laughter.

* * *

"Say, Ino?" Sakura let her bright emerald eyes flick over to look out of the corner of her eyes to perhaps see one part of the blonde.

"Hm?"

Sakura let her eyes linger back down on the woman who was finishing up the last nail on her left hand while her feet were soaking away, her eyebrows throbbing from just being waxed.

"What is it, Sakura? If you don't like the shape, ask her to form them a little more." Ino called as she studied her nails that were finished not a second earlier.

"You know that guy…?" Sakura let her head fall back against the cushiony headrest to try to sort through the explanation before she heard the other girl snort at the pause.

"Which one, there are many? Is this about Sasuke-kun again? Naru-chan is going to come out of left field and kill us." Ino chuckled with obvious falseness.

"No…Kiba-kun. Naru-chan's neighbor? Her brother Kakashi's friend. Remember him?"

"Oh! The porn twins!" Ino waved her hand to will away her upcoming giggles, "Hina-chan has some _different_ choices in men, huh?"

Sakura gave out a lazy laugh, "That's the thing…"

"What, Hinata?" Ino turned her head sharply to watch the woman who just finished Sakura's nails walk away.

"Haven't you noticed?"

"You being vague doesn't help." Ino clucked her tongue

"She's been happier," Sakura sighed almost wistfully, "It's all because of that Kakashi guy."

It was cute really. Hinata going along with everything and mixing everyone's names together, as well as her brain would allow her. It just got so confusing sometimes, and she knew she almost slipped on several occasions if Naruto wasn't there to poke her.

"And you want to date this Kiba guy?"

Naruto, Kiba…Same-same.

"I figured I'd take a stab at getting to know him." Sakura admitted.

"Ah. So Naru-chan doesn't take a stab at you for getting to know Sasuke."

Sakura shrugged back into the chair, "Something like that."

* * *

Desert consisted of Kakashi putting out a small cake, a cluster of forks and telling everyone to dig in. Kiba and Naruto didn't hesitate as they leaned on the dining room table and filled their mouths to the breaking point before thinking of chewing. They had obviously done this before, and the thought of exchanging colds wasn't that big of a deal. Kiba persuaded Hinata through a few looks, a hip bump and prodding her a little with a fork. Naruto managed to shove cake in Sasuke's face since he refused to eat anything sweet and therefore delicious, and

Naruto managed to choke on the remaining cake he had lingering in his mouth when he took off for his life after Sasuke realized what happened. Everyone clustered together on the couch in the living room to play a video game, and Sasuke even joined in after Naruto teased and insulted him to the point he had no choice but to defend himself. But after Naruto, Kiba, and Hinata turned it around and ganged up on him, he just handed the controller over to Kakashi who lingered in a doorway.

Once the late hours started rolling in, Kiba announced he was going to walk Hinata home for her curfew while Naruto picked up the little messes everyone made with Sasuke helping silently.

"Say, teme…?" Naruto grabbed a discarded can off the coffee table before glancing over at Sasuke who was giving him a waiting look.

"What, dobe?" Sasuke walked towards the kitchen intent on emptying his arms of the mess he didn't make and mentally noted to punch Kiba.

The blonde trotted behind him silently for a moment while the two dumped things here and put things there and avoided Kakashi completely before Naruto spoke again, "What time do you have to be home?"

Sasuke shrugged, "Itachi doesn't care as long as my grades keep in shape. I could be missing for three weeks and he wouldn't sweat a drop as long as I still have top grades."

Naruto stared in awe, always being ushered inside by his dad practically dragging him by his feet, but he shook it off suddenly and blinked with a light wave.

"Do you want to watch a movie?" Naruto suggested with a tone that lifted slightly in hope.

"Is Kiba coming back?" Sasuke glared out of the corner of his eyes as he leaned on the door frame that led to the kitchen.

"No. He has too much homework." Naruto said with a wrinkled brow that showed slight confusion.

"Then that sounds fine. If I had to listen to him ramble on for five more minutes, Naruto…I swear…" Sasuke gave an exhausted look that was mixed with a murderous glare.

Naruto sputtered before he slapped his hand over his lips, silencing a laugh that would have been mocking, but his twinkling eyes and trembling shoulders gave away the inner laughter.

"Idiot." Sasuke mumbled.

Naruto's laughter seeped through his closed fingers quickly when it doubled, before he smacked his free hand over the other, and slammed his eyes shut while his shoulders shook uncontrollably.

"What in the hell are you laughing at?" Sasuke smirked lightly despite himself, seeing Naruto in a laughing fit could make anyone crack something of a smile.

Naruto shook his head along with shaking off the laughter before dragging the raven back to the living room, "It's nothing, bastard. What movie?"

The blonde was a little embarrassed to say that he was beyond overjoyed with how the day had played out, but he figured eventually he would be able to tell Sasuke one day that this just took the spot for best day of his life.

Naruto held up a few movies splayed out in his hands like he was playing cards, Sasuke shaking off his suddenly passing thought and wiping his growing smile to his usual scowl.

"Just pick something that isn't annoying, dobe."

Naruto whipped back around after tossing the movies aside and dug through the compartments on either side of the television for something that he thought would be more Sasuke's taste.

Sasuke went back to his passing thought and caught it quickly while he watched Naruto make a mess in the newly cleaned room, a smile slowly forming back onto his face when the blonde would hold a movie up and then toss it away with a shake of his head.

Sasuke wasn't the type to voice many things aloud, but maybe one day, he most likely would make a passing comment to Naruto about how this was the best day of his life.

* * *

Naruto flopped onto the couch after putting the disc in to play, with such a force, that there was a loud creak and a rather resounding snapping sound that caused the pair to look at each other; Naruto's seat sinking in more than it should have been.

Naruto looked over with wide blue eyes and Sasuke with amused black.

"Please," Naruto looked around the room to the hallways and the entrance to the kitchen before whispering, "_don't_ tell Kakashi. He'll like, make me build him a new one or something equally sadistic."

Sasuke snorted at the pleading voice, "Fatass."

The blonde blinked a few times before chuckling, his eyes crinkling at the edges from the force of his smile, "How come…Around you…?"

Sasuke cracked half a smile, "What?"

The blonde calmed his giggles, "I destroy my living room? My dad still hasn't let go of the fact that we killed the living room when he got in that fight."

Sasuke laughed lightly, "Yeah, that's because you went Hulk and flung a damn table across the room."

Naruto laughed loudly while clutching his stomach while his knees folded up at the pull, "Yeah, I was already green from being sick, you bastard. But who flipped the couch?"

"Technically, you." Sasuke stated matter-of-factly with an impassive face.

Naruto snorted and let out a loud laugh that had him curling into himself, "Yeah, when you _threw_ me."

Sasuke shoved the blonde's shoulder that had Naruto falling over on the couch before he punched his leg, "Come on dobe, calm down."

Sasuke knew Naruto had many spontaneous moments, and he was sure that his laughter was the best part of all of them.

Naruto sat up again, and rubbed away at the tears that hadn't quite made it out of his eyes before flashing a dazzling smile in Sasuke's direction, "I don't know any bastard movies, so I just picked one."

Sasuke's unconscious smile instantly faded.

He was pretty sure he had an idea of how Naruto worked, and he was pretty sure with the blonde's personality it was going to be some horrible comedy with no plot.

Sasuke felt his left eye twitch, "What movie did you pick?"

"Something…" Naruto said with smile that was dying to crack into laughter.

"What. Movie?"

"Superbad."

"You know Naruto," Sasuke began, "When I think about it, Itachi worries. I should get home."

The blonde punched Sasuke's arm as hard as he could while giving him a withering look, "What do you want to watch, your highness?"

"No, no," Sasuke chuckled at the look Naruto was shooting him; "I don't want to hurt your head with something too complex."

"You…are such a bastard."

"Press play, simpleton." Sasuke smirked.

Naruto grabbed the remote from the far end of the couch where it was sitting patiently and pressed the play button, the raven holding in annoyed comments while Naruto folded his legs up underneath of himself.

Sasuke was pretty damn sure he heard Ino talk about this movie to Shikamaru one day, and even though it had some random plot, it still sounded horribly dumb.

He tuned Ino out quicker than he usually did.

Sasuke felt Naruto tug on the sleeve of his t-shirt while he was zoning out, and turned to look at him with a questioning look.

"Want something to drink?"

"What do you want? I'll get it."

Anything to get away from the movie.

Naruto paused a moment to think about it while the movie was playing loudly in the background and Kakashi was talking loudly on the phone somewhere down the hallway.

"A soda."

Sasuke stood as quickly as he could, wondering how long he could stall in Naruto's kitchen with saying he couldn't find the cans of soda when had pulled out a few earlier for the blonde.

"Hey, teme…" Naruto called lightly.

Sasuke turned to look over his shoulder only a step away from the couch to notice the blonde fiddling with the bottom of the bright orange shirt that just screamed Naruto.

"What, dobe?" Sasuke turned waiting for Naruto to ask for more food because Sasuke had heard his stomach grumbling while they played video games.

It was such an endless pit.

Naruto looked up at him, his eyebrows drawn together in concentration, "Thank you."

Sasuke resisted the urge to snort while he turned to face him, "For what?"

The blonde paused for the briefest moments before his face relaxed, and he shook his head; his hair limply following along and brushing his forehead in a tickling sort of way while he went back to looking at his lap.

"Never mind."

Sasuke felt his forehead wrinkle in question right along with his eyebrows drawing together as he continued to stare at the blonde, his brain working to figure out what Naruto had meant.

It clicked pretty simply.

Not thank you for dating him or kissing him or putting up with him or any awkward nonsense like that. Naruto might be the type to say thank you for something like that, but it wasn't the time. Naruto wasn't going to say thank you for getting him the soda, if anything, he'd make a joke about Sasuke being his slave.

Naruto was saying thank you for what Sasuke couldn't open his mouth for and say thank you for, or his Uchiha pride and whatever other nonsense wouldn't allow him to.

The great day, the lingering smiles, the easy laughs; and most likely putting up with Kiba and Kakashi.

That was what Naruto was saying thank you for, and he was too embarrassed to finish it.

Sasuke took the one step back to the couch, and swooped down and put his hand on the back cushion next to Naruto's head to support himself from not falling over, and at the same time, catching the blonde's attention.

Sasuke used his other hand to quickly and sweetly grab the back of Naruto's neck and pulled the blonde forward gently so their lips could connect.

The blonde had relaxed his stiffened body that had seized up as a natural reaction when someone would grab you suddenly, and leaned into the simply sweet lingering kiss. Naruto's hands reached up and grabbed at the front of Sasuke's shirt to tug him forward when he realized he wanted the raven closer, before he realized if he wrapped his arms around his neck,  
Sasuke would most likely fall.

Naruto was pretty sure that if they hadn't 'practiced' doing this on a daily basis in front of his school, he would have screwed up; bumped foreheads, tugged too hard and made Sasuke topple over, or get so caught up in how amazingly soft and perfect Sasuke's lips were he would have drifted and fallen over himself.

Naruto felt Sasuke pull back, their lips just barely disconnecting before he felt Sasuke peck at his lips lightly one last time before he could feel his own tan eyelids fluttering open.

The blonde peeked through his eyelashes to see Sasuke smirking at him from in front of his face before he heard him mumble, "Idiot."

The blonde snorted before tugging on Sasuke's shirt so the raven would get the hint to come forward so they could share another kiss before he would bug him to go get his soda like a good servant.

Besides, 'idiot' was as close to 'thank you' as Naruto could hope for.

* * *

Naruto stirred under the many covers of his bed and fought with one of his pillows without realizing what it was before his senses raced back to him.

Firstly, his phone was screaming an obnoxiously fast paced, guitar laced, vocal thrumming song that made him sit bolt upright and realize that it might just be past what was considered a 'normal' time to awaken. That tip was simply given away by the amount of sun streaming through his window that usually only had the sun start seeping through the blinds around one.

The second awkward part while the scrambled mess of a mind was trying to lay everything out peacefully for the day, Naruto was trying to figure out how in the hell he had gotten to bed.  
Last he remembered he was in between laughing at Sasuke's worded distaste for the movie he selected and distractedly wondering if his eyelids could hold open much longer.

Those two thoughts were wrapped around a perfect kiss.

Naruto ran a hand on top of his head and rubbed at his hair while he looked around confusedly, searching for something unknown when he landed on an upturned paper plate next to his bed with neat scrawl and a pen laying politely on top.

Naruto swooped down and snatched the plate with a lazy, groggy grin while he swept his eyes over the note.  
_  
Dobe,  
From now on, no more movies past your bed time. And lay off the cake, you're fucking heavy.  
Call me when you wake your lazy ass up._

Naruto snorted as he tossed the twice used plate like a Frisbee and hopped up from his bed to rush to the bathroom once he realized his bladder was the third and final thing that came knocking on his brain.

Naruto came strolling back into his room with a stretch and a yawn; his shirt half off, one sock missing, and one pant leg somehow rolled up past his knee.

He was a different type of sleeper.

The blonde walked up to his bed and limply grabbed his phone while shuffling to his dresser and easily ignoring the missed call from Kiba.  
Naruto held the phone up to his ear while he yanked the dresser opened and absently wondered if he could get away without a shower today, and realized he cared less more and more each day with dressing up as a girl. Who in the hell showered and changed clothes three to four times a day without doing anything? But in the end, he knew he would just take one before bed. Naruto listened absently to the ringing while he pulled out clean clothes.  
_  
"Dobe?"_

Naruto jerked away from the phone, forgetting he was waiting for Sasuke to pick up, "Hey, fat ass."

The blonde grinned when he heard Sasuke snort, _"I thought you were a morning person_."

Naruto shrugged as he shut the last drawer with his knee, before he noticed the raven couldn't see him. "I was busy."  
_  
"Sleeping_."

"Pfft. Think what you want." Naruto said with an air of casualness as he tried to remain balanced as he attempted to change.  
_  
"I'm coming over._"

Naruto rolled his eyes, "Demanding."  
_  
"Idiot._"

"Well, get a move on teme!" Naruto waved his hand wildly in the air to just throw his balance off the perfect amount to have the blonde topple over on his backside.  
_  
"I had to deal with Kiba yesterday, don't make me spend this day taking you to the hospital because you can't get the blonde in check."_

Naruto turned his head towards the phone that landed next to his face before rolling his eyes, "The blonde isn't going anywhere, just like you and being a bastard."  
_  
"Are you dressed_?"

Naruto looked at himself, "Working on it."  
_  
"Well, I'm almost at your house. Open the door when you're done._"

Naruto's face upturned when the line died before he remembered that the drive between his house and Sasuke's took all of a blink of an eye. He kept forgetting that all his new friends lived just outside his neighborhood in the fairytale part of town that he and Kiba always thought was untouchable and unreachable.

Who knew?

The blonde jumped up and double checked the blinds with a nervous laugh to himself before quickly changing his clothes; double and triple checking that all the clothes were his.  
Naruto grabbed his phone and decided now wouldn't be that bad of a time to call back Kiba, freak Sasuke out a little before telling him that Kiba and Hinata were going out on a date soon.

The blonde shuffled his bare feet against the floor as he walked towards the front door, trying to take his time to not seem eager even though he wanted to run. Naruto pressed the phone to his ear and didn't get past a full ring before Kiba picked up in a panic.  
_  
"Naruto!_?"

"Look, Kiba, I told you that you should have taken notes from those lessons." Naruto grinned cheekily as he undid the locks to the front door.  
_  
"No, blondie! You need to high tail it the fuck over to my house._" Kiba snapped.

The blonde opened the door to see Sasuke standing on the stoop, his face looking towards Kiba's house.

"I can't go on the date with you, Kiba. Remember, sweet nothings, complement, and don't spill anything." Naruto waved his hand to try and get the raven's attention before he noticed Sasuke's forehead was crinkled in question.  
_  
"No, Naruto. Sakura is here, looking for _you._ The guy you_."

That's when Naruto could hear Hinata's voice suddenly, and then Sakura's voice reply and he was guessing Kiba passed through a room to give the hint. The asshole must be giving one hell of a cover story for the two to be in the house without him.

And the only thing Naruto could do was give a voice of disbelief as he looked from Sasuke to listening to the phone.

"Bullshit."

* * *

Author's Notes: Alright. Transition period. –claps-  
_Please_ don't bite my head off about the _Harry Potter reference. If the joke like…wasn't right or something. Like, you know, didn't go along with the book or something. It's been a long time since I've read those books, and my memory is competing with one compared to a goldfish. _


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter 22- The Bastard versus The Shrew

Author's Notes: The question of the hour:  
_How Many More Chapters?  
Answer: I'm honestly hoping to end this anywhere from between 28 and 30 chapters, but, I can't make up my mind. I'm also horrible and I never do outlines (people who've been with me from the start know my insanity). I'm going to keep trying to update the current weekly schedule, but I do advise you all to keep an eye on my profile if I'm late. So don't worry guys, and hold on tight for the bad joo-joo stuff… because… here comes the drama._

Also: I know you all thought I was Sakura bashing, and in fact, I wasn't. So, you guys might want to readily prepare yourselves for the fact that Sakura is in fact, coming back, and I am not in fact, bashing her. And kids, remember that this is _SasuNaru_ not _NaruSaku_.

AND (last but _not_ least): THANK YOU ALL! Over 600 reviews, really? You guys are awesome. When I started this insane thing, I didn't think anyone would be interested. So, thank you all for sticking with it and _staying_ interested.

Chapter 22 – The Bastard versus The Shrew

Dedication: My understanding, wonderfully and insanely sweet muses Taylor and Jen for helping me through my most difficult time.  
As well as _salvor-chan_ for being my 600th reviewer.

Kiba – Kakashi  
Kakashi – Naruto Senior  
Naruto (WHEN A GIRL!) – Naruto Junior or Naru-chan  
Naruto (WHEN A BOY!) – Kiba  
Sasuke – Bastard.

"Actually, I've been thinking it ever since I got here: Why oh why didn't I take the BLUE pill?"  
-The Matrix

(Again, I didn't edit much. Please, try and forgive me.)

* * *

Naruto stared in the direction of Sakura's sporty car that he made plenty of sexual references towards while Hinata always smacked him. He couldn't figure out why on earth she had shown up looking for Kiba…well, Naruto, just - oh you know.

"_Move it Naruto! My mom has hidden fucking family photos that I had no idea existed. Does _everyone_ have those stupid baby bath time pictures?_"

"She's over there looking for me?"

Sasuke walked in and simply leaned on the door frame with his arms loosely crossed over his chest after he pushed his sunglasses atop his head.  
_  
"Yes! You! Well…Kiba you! Un-tuck your balls and get over here!"_

Naruto went to reply and ask what in the hell he was supposed to do when he noticed he didn't hear anything on the other end of the line, and when he pulled the phone off of his ear and brought it around to his face, he noticed Kiba hung up.

"Damn…" Naruto whispered in a whine.

"Why is Sakura at Kiba's house?"

Naruto's eyes flicked over the edge of his phone to come into focus with Sasuke's curious face, "Well…"

"What did you do?"

The blonde grinned as he slid his phone in his pocket, "That's technically, what _we_ did."

"Come again?"

Naruto turned to walk down the hall to grab his shoes and socks, because since Sakura was in the house, there wasn't any avoiding it.

"Remember how we set everything up to make Sakura jealous?"

"Yes." Sasuke casually followed behind Naruto, already knowing where the conversation was going.

Naruto turned into his room at the end of the hallway while Sasuke lingered in the doorway, "It kinda worked."

"Kind of, as in…"

"Well, she already met me. Remember, when you stalked me to my house?" Naruto grinned with a laugh while Sasuke rolled his eyes.

"Apparently, she went to Kiba's house looking for me. In all honesty it might just be to talk about the girl me because of how I've been acting." Naruto slid on a clean pair of socks, hopping around awkwardly as he didn't bother to sit down.

Sasuke raised a curious brow, "How have you been acting?"

The blonde paused to rub the back of his neck and study his sneakers that were patiently waiting for him side by side on the floor, "I've been a little…mean?"

"Stop being so discrete, dobe."

Naruto rolled his eyes with a huff, "I've been…"

It was embarrassing, when it boiled down to it.

"I've been just acting like a bitch. Mood swings. Just getting into character."

"And you said _I_ was the dumbest liar in history?" Sasuke asked dryly.

Naruto slid his feet into his sneakers with a few shoves, scratching at his forehead, "Maybe…just maybe…I got a little snappy when they talked about you. Don't let it blow up your ego."

"So why would she go talk to…Kiba?" Sasuke was sure his IQ was dropping by the second.

"She thinks the guy me is my best friend…to the girl me. So either she is trying to get with the guy me to try and get at you, or try and talk to the guy me to find out what is wrong with the girl me."

Sasuke blinked and shook his head, "Stop referring to yourself as the 'guy me' and the 'girl me'."

Naruto chuckled, "It won't take long. I'll make some excuse and come back."

"I'm supposed to stay here?"

"Yeah." Naruto said in a 'no-duh' sort of fashion.

Sasuke was damn sure it wasn't jealousy. Damn sure. The raven was pretty sure it was the fact that the blonde was about to walk over to his best friend's house and socialize with the girl who made him want to vomit.

And made Naruto cry at one point in time.

It was just pure distaste.

The blonde walked up to Sasuke with a sweet smile, "Don't get all crazy, bastard."

Sasuke furrowed his brow, "And how am I getting crazy?"

Naruto pursed his lips while his eyes smiled with mischief, "You have that glint in your eyes…"

"You are such an idiot."

"And you love it." Naruto laughed.

The blonde instantly sucked in a quick breath, right around the time Sasuke chose to check down the hallway towards the front door like he heard something interesting.  
Naruto looked towards his feet and mumbled his leave while the raven looked towards the ceiling and mumbled his understanding.

They would both deny to their dying day they uttered or heard anything, and they would damn sure deny the embarrassed blush that just barely tinted their cheeks.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Naruto quietly slid open the back door, already knowing it would be unlocked, because it was pretty much impossible for him to come waltzing in through the front door at that point.  
The blonde turned to slide the door shut quietly behind him just in time to have Kiba practically tackle him in joy, and Naruto had to muffle his yell from shock.

"About _time_!" Kiba whispered harshly as he held the blonde by the shoulders.

"Where is your mom?" The blonde whispered back while he looked around worriedly.

"She went to pick up Akamaru from the vet."

"Oh. Surgery go well?"

"Yeah, great actually."

"All better now?" Naruto asked lightly.

"Yeah – Wait! Shut up and get out there!" Kiba said pointing his finger towards the living room.

"What did you tell her?"

Kiba snorted, "You had a really bad headache, so you were lying down. I said Hinata and I were checking on you before we left."

Naruto spared a pained look, "Is this going to interfere with the date?"

Kiba's eyes grew lightly before he waved his friend off, "Don't worry that tiny little brain of yours. I have it covered. Move it."

The blonde went to step towards the living room, "Wait…"

Kiba groaned, "What?"

"Well, I was just wondering…why didn't you tell her to just come back?"

Kiba paused, blinking a few times curiously, "She just insisted on making sure you were alright."

"How long till your mom gets home?"

"A few hours. She wanted to stop a few places. You're in the clear."

Naruto walked casually down the hallway that lead to the living room where Hinata was talking to Sakura. The blonde passed by Kiba's room with a casual glance inside where he saw a large stack of framed photos on his bed that must have been family ones. Naruto made a mental note to run in there and snatch the baby one to show to Hinata.

The blonde reached his hands up and ruffled his hair more than necessary before squinting his eyes just as he walked into the living room with a suddenly sluggish pace.  
Hinata's eyes immediately flicked to Naruto, Kiba right behind him, when he entered the room. The blonde sent her a quick wink when he noticed Sakura was facing away from him.

Hinata perked with a quick smile, making Sakura turn around, "Oh! Kiba-kun! How are you feeling?"

Naruto raised his hand up and lightly rubbed his head, "Yeah. Sorry to keep you waiting. I had no idea everyone was here and concerned."

The two girls stood, and Sakura waved Naruto off, "I just wanted to come over and talk to you, and it was pretty nice to see Kakashi-kun and Hina-chan here."

Naruto flashed the best smile he could, "What did you want to-"

Naruto was cut off by a set of knocks that came from the front door, making the four teens turn to look quickly before Naruto immediately turned to look Kiba with wide eyes.

Kiba and Naruto exchanged uneasy glances before the blonde moved towards the door with uneasy steps to answer it. The blonde could feel two pairs of eyes on him that had an unsure air to it, because when it boiled down to it, he didn't know who was going to be on the other side of that door.

It could be Kiba's relatives, who Naruto knew all of, and he could hear all of them when he answered the door like he owned the place. All of it started with, '_What in the hell_…?' and he really couldn't blame them. Then the possibility of Kiba's mom coming home with her arms full and kicking the door with a knock, signaling Kiba to open it. She was pretty used to Naruto there, but he really couldn't explain in a blink to call him Kiba and her son Kakashi. Then, the rare, and obvious sadistic occasion that it could be his father once he stumbled upon Sasuke and felt the need to come over for no apparent reason.

But when Naruto opened the door, trying to hide the horrified expression for what was waiting on the other side; he had no idea how to react.

So Sakura reacted for him.

"Sasuke-kun!" Sakura blushed furiously, having been avoiding Sasuke more since time wore on and her actions caused her more embarrassment.

One, would be calling Naruto out, and two would be trying to stop him from running after him.

The only time Sakura saw him for the past week, was when of course he was with Naruto in front of the school, and in turn walked the other way as if she forgot something particularly important.

Naruto on the other hand, stared in disbelief at the raven who was standing on the front steps casually like this happened every day.

The raven smirked, "Naru-chan is lying down since she stayed up late last night studying."

Kiba didn't know whether to snort at the thought of his best friend putting effort into studying, or run for his life at the face his best friend was making towards the teen standing in his doorway.

"I…I didn't know you knew…" Sakura trailed off.

Sasuke smiled gently, a false sweet smile, "Kiba? Of course, he is my girlfriend's best friend."

It was scary, Sasuke thought, how accurate that statement was close to being.

"Well," Naruto said while blinking away the new awkward feeling that lingered, "Why don't you come in."

Sasuke stepped inside, smiling towards Hinata who returned it gently and glared at Kiba who smirked back.

Naruto mumbled under his breath while shutting the door after the raven was completely inside and his back on the group, "What? You don't trust me or something?"

Sasuke pretended as if he had a menacing itch on the corner of his mouth while he responded back, "I don't trust _her_, dobe."

"I can handle it."

"Hardly."

"Hardly what?" Sakura asked, after the last word had not been as quiet as Sasuke intended with the snort and all.

Sasuke turned to the girl, "The door. It hardly ever stays unlocked."

The blonde quickly reached back and snapped the lock in place before anyone could really have a fair say against what Sasuke had said.

"Well…" Sakura trailed off as she turned to Hinata, "Are you and Kakashi going to be off on your date now?"

Kiba and Naruto shared another uneasy look while Hinata hesitantly turned towards Kiba with a questioning look mixed with pure worry.

Naruto walked up to Kiba and threw an arm over his shoulder, "Yeah, they are, but I'm going to go make this kid changes his shirt. Who the hell wears yellow?"

Sasuke smirked, Sakura giggled, Hinata blushed, Naruto smiled and Kiba looked downright confused – there was a _tiny_ smudge of yellow – Oh…it was mustard.

The blonde steered Kiba towards his own room while waving back and flashing a smile when actually, in reality, he sounded like he was hyperventilating.  
Naruto shoved his best friend through the doorway of Kiba's bedroom and slammed the door in his wake, Kiba tripping over his feet and landing on his bed to send the pile of photos scattering just barely.

The blonde looked at the brunette in desperation, "What in the _fuck_ do I do?"

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Hinata politely excused herself to the restroom to check herself over to make sure her clothes and make-up were fine before she assumed they set off. The blonde had flicked on some little paranoid button in the girl's head that there was stain somewhere unnoticed or perhaps make-up smeared.

She wasn't exactly sure if they were leaving and leaving Naruto to fend for himself, let alone in Kiba's house with Sakura and Sasuke.

Who, were actually, by themselves in Kiba's living room.

Sasuke glanced down the hallway where Kiba and Naruto had disappeared down, and could be heard having a muffled argument; something with 'fucking idiot', 'you look like a condom' and of course, 'why in the fuck do I _help_ you?' Apparently, Naruto had figured out what he was going to do about Sakura and Sasuke, which was the harsh whispers coming from Kiba's room before they busted into loud yelling. Either that, or they had forgotten once Kiba realized the blonde made a passing insult in front of Hinata.

"How is Naru-chan?" Sakura asked quietly while she fiddled with the hem of her skirt.

The raven glared at the piece of clothing that matched her head, "She's fine."

Sakura winced at the clipped tone, "Sasuke-kun, about the other day…"

The resisted the urge to snort. It was far from the other day, and he was enjoying the fact that Sakura was avoiding him like the damn plague do to extreme embarrassment, and he sure didn't want to end it now.

"Hn."

Good ol' Uchiha, true to his grunting ways.

"It's just, I apologized to Naru-chan, and I promised her I would apologize to you because you deserved one."

Sasuke knew that if Naruto would have forewarned him, he might have avoided this fucking situation. Though, knowing the dobe, he would have promised Sasuke to be nice or something equally impossible.

"Hn."

Damn, that works every time, and for everything no less.

"I'm sorry Sasuke-kun-"

The raven looked towards the ceiling, attempting to drown out her voice, "Hn."

"I hope we can put it behind us."

Us? When it concerned Sasuke and Sakura, he was damn certain there was no 'us', "Hn."

"It's just…you're dating one of my best friends…"

Snort.

"I want us to get along for Naru-chan."

The raven paused before he decided to go with the easiest answer, "Hn."

The door to Kiba's room opened then, Kiba having latched onto the front of Naruto's shirt and the blonde latched onto Kiba's; the two still yelling and now apparently fighting.  
Once they came crashing down to the floor in between a Hinata who was making her way back to the living room, and Sakura and Sasuke, they bounced up and smiled like nothing happened.

Kiba grabbed Hinata's hand and pulled her forward gently before announcing to everyone that they were leaving to head out on their date while Hinata sent back worried glances with her light gray eyes.

Kiba would tell her once they got in the car that he had slipped Naruto the house key and gave him a short time frame while the blonde made up some crazy excuse.

Naruto called towards the doorway while he made his way completely in the living room, "Next time Kakashi, you have to be a good boyfriend and drive."

Hinata opened her mouth to say that she offered to drive because she knew how much Kiba enjoyed her car before the boy simply turned to shoot his best friend a foul look and slammed the front door shut.

Naruto turned to look at Sasuke, who had his usual impassive mask set in place, and then to Sakura, who was smiling kindly with a tint of blush.

Oh shit.

"Do you mind if I talk to you for a moment, Kiba-kun?" Sakura asked as she flashed her eyelashes with a few fluttering blinks.

Oh shit. Ohshitohshitohshit.

Naruto didn't even want to look at Sasuke at that moment, knowing he would be glaring at the girl and hoping his glare would shoot her into flames. Or shooting that death glare at him.

"Actually, I'm supposed to be heading out with Sasuke. I promised him earlier that I'd hang out with him while Naru-chan was resting up."

"Oh," The girl's face fell slightly while she studied the ground and played with her fingers, and for a moment, the blonde thought he was off the hook.

"Well, if it's alright with you, would you like to hang out after school Monday?"

The blonde swallowed, and knew it was loud in the suddenly quiet room, "Just us?"

Sasuke glared at the girl to his right.

"Yeah, doesn't your school get out the same time?"

Sasuke glared harder.

"Yeah."

Sasuke glared to the point, that if you didn't know him, you'd think his eyes were closed.

"So just us, after school?"

"Yeah," Sakura blushed, "A date?"

Shit.

* * *

Author's Note's: The quote is, yes, from the Matrix. Yeah, I went there. It can be taken a lot of ways, and hopefully you all can figure out in due time what it means while you wait till next week for the next chapter.


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter 23 – Midnight Confessions

Author's Notes (nice, long and winded): _Well, seeing how the reviews were positively wonderful, I just need to say _thank you._ The take on the Blue pill, and red pill was fun.  
I'm almost done with the last chapter, and things at home are more hectic than ever, but seeing as how my mother is doing better, I wanted to celebrate with posting this chapter early. Not to mention, as a graduation present for a friend.  
_  
Warnings: Be prepared for OCC-ness and some fluff_.  
_  
Disclaimer: _I still don't own it._

Dedication: Firstly, to _S. Wright_, for always reviewing wonderfully and giving me one more extra reason to be excited to update.  
And secondly, for everyone who has still stuck with this fiction and still enjoys reading it. Thank you all for your wonderful reviews as well.

Chapter 23 – Midnight Confessions

* * *

Naruto had completely forgotten the baby picture of Kiba in the soapy sink, playing with a stuffed dog with a head of soapy brown hair and a wide open smile so big his eyes were shut.

The blonde only forgot it because of one, tiny little problem.

"Why in the hell did you agree dobe?"

Tiny or big as hell – it was the same thing these days.

The blonde shut the front door behind him; finally getting home after sputtering nonsense to Sakura that was their supposed, somewhat, plans and making his way back over to his house with Sasuke.

"What else was I supposed to do?"

The raven gave the blonde a look that clearly said '_are you fucking stupid_', "Say no."

"Could you just listen for a minute?"

Sasuke rolled his eyes and leaned against the wall with a casual crossing of the arms, "Only a minute? This is going to be better than I thought."

The blonde glared and resisted the urge to stomp his foot like a child before he opened his mouth to talk, just around the time the front door swung opened and smacked him into the wall.

"Na-Na! I'm _HOME_~!" Kakashi sang out while the blonde cursed and kicked at the trapping door.

The grayed man smiled towards Sasuke as he dropped his bags down on the floor, before looking around the door at his squirming son who was spitting foul words as he wedged himself free.

Sasuke's eyes flicked over to Kakashi who was still lingering with a sweet smile that was pinching his eyes closed, looking expectantly at the two, before Sasuke looked back to the blonde, "Alright, dobe. Let's go."

"Excuse me?" Naruto asked indignantly.

"We're going to your room."

Kakashi waved one of his hands limply in front of him, "You two leave the door open."

"Kakashi, I've been in your son's room on plenty of occasions with the door closed." Sasuke said while shooting a glare while Naruto passed by.

The older man threw his hands over his ears, "Oh my virgin ears!"

The raven snorted, "And Naruto is…?"

"Ah! Touché, Sasuke-kun." Kakashi clapped his hands together lightly, "But be gentle, it's his first time."

Sasuke's face pulled up in disgust, "Do you hear yourself talk?"

"No…not really. I do what most people should and I just tune myself out."

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Sasuke walked into Naruto's room first, and the blonde shut the door silently behind them and was almost tempted to lock it to keep his nosey father out.

The great thing about Kakashi though, he knew something was serious, he knew he had to just leave it and but out.

The raven turned around to face the blonde that had stopped after closing the door, "So, are you going to explain _why_ you agreed to go on a date with Sakura, dobe?"

Naruto went rigid at the icy tone and glare Sasuke was shooting at him, but eased up to put up a defiant stance, "Again – what else am I supposed to do in my situation?"

"Your situation? Naruto, people get turned down everyday." Sasuke shot.

"And I would have bet my left fake tit she would have asked why. And that wouldn't have been easy to explain, Sasuke." The blonde shot right back.

The raven pinched the bridge of his nose, "Could you elaborate _blonde_, dobe."

Naruto glared, "I'm still trying to figure out how to unravel this whole damn mess!"

The raven uncrossed his arms that he didn't remember crossing, "What?"

"I have more people involved in this whole thing now than just me. Kiba is involved and so is my dad and Hinata got dragged in, and most importantly _you_!" Naruto half shouted before gasping and then blushing.

"Dobe, one day you might think before you snap." Sasuke sighed.

The blonde grumbled, "Just think about it, teme. Suddenly 'Naru-chan' leaves Madame Francis's Hell Hole and the guy who just so happens to live next door to her just so happens to end up dating you and kills _your_ reputation?"

Again, Naruto sucked in a breath because he and Sasuke had never discussed openly dating once the blonde dropped the cross-dressing act.

It never came up.

Then again, how do you bring that up over dinner?

'Hey, once you drop the fake breasts and short skirt, want to go public?'

Yeah, sure.

Sasuke eyed Naruto for a moment, his dark eyes boring into bright blue before softening the glare and looking away.

"And not to mention!" The blonde continued on suddenly, "She up and disappears, and _I,_ the real Naruto ends up being Kakashi's real son, Kakashi as in Naruto Senior and then maybe, just maybe, people will realize I look like that guy. That I'm Naruto and not Kiba. And what about Kiba who goes by Kakashi and Naru-chan's brother? I just have a lot of shit to untie, and right now, she is the first step. I just have to get her to back the hell off."

Sasuke grumbled something under his breath.

"And teme…"

Sasuke looked back at the blonde, trying to hide the look for how he was feeling.

"It's not like I want to do this. I'm going to just be a complete ass and piss her off." Naruto made his way to his bed and pulled out a clear tub from underneath, shuffling through it and pulling out a small innocent box, "How do you think she'll handle itching powder?"

Jealousy was very unbecoming.

And Naruto wasn't one to have someone swoon over his boyfriend.

Hopefully, Naruto wasn't one to swoon back.

* * *

Saturday ended with a weird awkwardness hanging in the air as Sasuke left to go out to eat with his brother and parents who just so happened to be home for the weekend.

Sasuke tried not to make a big deal out of it, but Naruto could see in his eyes he didn't want to go.

The blonde didn't sleep well that night after he had finally wondered inside after sitting out on the front step with Kiba and listened about the date.

Apparently, it went well despite the mistakes.

Kiba had gone in for the first kiss which they surprisingly enough hadn't shared, and smashed their noses, which caused a lot of blushing and sputtering of apologizes. The brunette said it was the perfect moment while they were waiting for their seats and looking over a moonlit pond. Apparently they had a few kinks to work out. Naruto imagined the two of them the color of a fire truck for the better part of the night rather easily, and could imagine Hinata stammering like she usually did when she lost her composure.

Hinata had spilt her drink while trying to slide out of the booth and all on Kiba's shirt and pants, which caused more blushing and sputtering. Once they left the restaurant, things seemed to fall all into place. The dog lover offered to drive and surprised her by driving her to the closest beach which was only an hour away, and let the two of them enjoy a short walk along the boardwalk before returning home.

Kiba said he finally got the kiss right.

The brunette admitted he listened to Naruto when the blonde gave him tips and pointers about etiquette and manners. Pulled out her chair, opened her door and walked her to the front steps.

Naruto was happy for him despite the utter turmoil that was plaguing him when his head hit the pillow after a quick shower.

He knew he had to chase Sakura away with both 'Naru-chan' and 'Kiba', and make sure he did it rather efficiently. When it boiled down to it, she really was the biggest hurtle in the marathon.

Because when he woke up this morning knowing that he and Sasuke were officially dating, that Sasuke was dating _him_ – Naruto – the real him, he knew he wanted to untie everything and back out of this dumb idea.

Now, he felt worried that Sasuke was beyond angry, or even worse, wouldn't want to actually date the real him publicly.

They hadn't talked about it still since one of Naruto's famous outbursts that afternoon because Sasuke left so quickly after his phone started ushering him out the door with his brother's voice on the other end.

Before Naruto knew exactly what he was doing, he was reaching down on the floor and grabbed his phone, absently thinking about asking his dad for a bedside table, and flicking through his short list of contacts till he reached Sasuke's number.

Before he could hang up, Sasuke's voice was at his ear, in a very irritated tone.

"_Whoever this is, it better be damn good_."

Naruto winced as he sat up on his bed, absently scratching at his exposed stomach as he slept without a shirt, "Teme?"

Sasuke's tone seemed to lesson a fraction, "_What the hell dobe_?"

"Were you sleeping?"

"_It's past midnight, I sure as hell was attempting_." Sasuke bit out in a slightly groggy voice.

Naruto swallowed thickly, "Can…I – Uh, can I talk you?"

There was a slight pause before a light tone graced Naruto's ear, "_What_?"

And once again, before Naruto's brain could stop his tongue, he spoke, "In person."

There was another short pause and the blonde listened to the rustling on the other end, and wondered if the raven was going to hang up or accept, "_I'll be there in a minute_."

There was no 'goodbye' or 'later' but the Uchiha simply hung the phone up and had the blonde scrambling out of the bed in search for a shirt.

Naruto threw on a thin messy undershirt and grabbed a pair of socks that he hastily threw on before peaking out his door to notice all the lights were shut off which meant Kakashi was most likely sound asleep.

Naruto went back to his room and made his way to his window where he slipped out so many times before with Kiba when they wondered the neighborhood late at night for no reason whatsoever.

The cool spring air hit his skin in a chill and sent goose bumps rising instantaneously. Naruto shuffled his way through the grass that was already soaked with dew while he cursed under his breath as his socks soaked up the wetness, and shivered at the chill.

Naruto just made it to the sidewalk as Sasuke's car pulled up, and the blonde had to double-take on the raven's speed before the Uchiha leaned over and opened the passenger door.

Naruto's sky blue eyes searched in the car to find Sasuke staring out the door at him, "Dobe."

The blonde huffed before flopping in the car seat and shutting the door and relishing in the heat that the car blasted from the vents before a jacket was thrown at his face.

The blonde wrestled with the article of clothing before turning to look at the raven who was adjusting in the seat; a black undershirt clinging to his body and loose draw string black pants covering his legs.

He really was trying to sleep.

Naruto hugged the jacket around his upper half before looking at his lap, "Thank you."

"What is so damn important that you had to wake me up, dobe?"

The blonde didn't hear any harshness in Sasuke's voice even though the sentence sounded rough, "I wanted to ask you something…"

The raven let his head settle back against the headrest while his lids drifted to half-mast, "And it couldn't wait?"

The blonde's lips pressed into a thin line while his cheeks tinted with red, "No. But if it's that big of a damn deal Ice Prick, then go back to bed!"

The blonde turned towards the door and reached a hand towards the handle all while handing back the jacket that was warming him before a cool hand stopped him on the back of his neck.

"I'm already here dobe, just tell me."

Naruto was more surprised by how soft Sasuke's voice came out more than anything else. He was used to the touches with the parade they put on in front of the school everyday, but the raven still had a hard edge to his voice as the days went on as if protecting something unknown.

The blonde settled back into the seat and into the jacket while he felt the hand retreat and studied the dashboard and smiled lightly at the fact that Sasuke was smart enough to not drive a stick.

"Are you mad?"

Sasuke's head stayed lifted from the headrest while he looked out the driver's side window, his elbow propped up on some piece of the car while his hand supported his chin, "About…?"

Naruto grinded his teeth together. "Me going on a date with Sakura?"

Jealousy was _very_ unbecoming.

Sasuke let out a harsh sigh, "Why wouldn't I be?"

Naruto turned to see the other teen scowling as he stared out the window and listened to him speak, "We just started…" Sasuke hesitated, not one to be so forward with words,

"Dating. Then here you go on a date with the girl you were pursuing in the first place. Naruto, how in the fuck am I supposed to not be mad?"

"Do you understand _why_?" Naruto asked in a whisper as he stared down at the floor as he suddenly found the mats interesting.

He heard Sasuke sigh, "Yes. That's why I'm so mad, idiot."

"Can I ask you one more thing?"

"That would be two…"

"Smartass." Naruto muttered.

Sasuke smirked before glancing at the blonde, "Go ahead."

Naruto mustard up the courage to face Sasuke who had his head already turned, and the two locked eyes. Piercing onyx eyes gave a hard stare while the worried sky blue eyes wavered. "When I finally undo everything, all the lies, and I'm back to being regular Naruto going to Konoha High School … Are you going to still want to date me?"

That was it. He said it – asked it.

He shouldn't have winced when he was done like someone was going to strike him, but the fact of the matter was that if Sasuke said that it was going to be a closet case of dating, Naruto couldn't take it.

"As in…not hide it?"

Well, what do you know? He got the hint.

Naruto let his eyes fall even though his head stayed in the general direction of the other teen. He couldn't stand to look at him knowing that Sasuke might say no, and the fact that he didn't know why it hurt so much scared the shit out of him.

The fact that he knew in the back of his mind he knew he was falling harder than he ever expected scared him shitless. He was supposed to hate this guy for what they dragged each other into, and here he was, not being able to get him off his mind.

Naruto jumped at the unexpected touch that he felt when Sasuke's fingers ran through his hair, and grumbled when the raven smirked, "Idiot."

"Teme."

"Dobe."

"Jackass."

"Moron."

"You have a lot of insults for someone so tired…"

It was like that in the car for awhile.

The only noise was the purring of the engine and the heat pouring from the vents. Sasuke had leaned over on the middle console to run his hand through Naruto's cloud soft hair more comfortably, and the blonde found his way to leaning on Sasuke's chest and unconsciously tracing his stomach muscles through Sasuke's clothing even though the console dug into his side. The blonde silently listened to the steady rhythm of the raven's heart as it drummed along, and relished in the sound silently.

No one said a word while the unanswered question hung in the air and the two sat contently together.

"Naruto…" Sasuke mumbled in a groggy voice after the silence, and the clock on the dash showing they had sat like that for more than and hour, "If anyone tries to convince you that all I want is to be with you behind closed doors, bring them to me."

The blonde chuckled tiredly through a yawn and blinked slowly, "Why?"

Naruto was waiting for some cheesy threat, but waited for the answer.

Sasuke kissed the only sun in the night and mumbled to the blonde head where his lips stayed while his hand finally laid to rest on Naruto's shoulder, "So I can tell them what idiot's they are…"

Sasuke trailed off, and Naruto didn't know if he had fallen off to sleep or decided to leave the answer to be left unsaid before he finally did answer, and shocked Naruto into stunned silence, "Because anyone would be proud to show you to the world."

It was a passing comment that was made with such sincerity that really did it, because Naruto knew Sasuke's personality, and knew that he didn't have to say it and most likely didn't want to.

He did take over an hour to say it, after all.

Besides, Sasuke was used to admiration and Naruto really wasn't. It was, after all, another roll reversal that Naruto wasn't ready for.

If the blonde was in the right state of mind, as in awake, he would have most likely cried.

Not because he was upset like a sane person would, but because not one single person had ever said anything like that to him in his entire life.

And here came Sasuke Uchiha, and with a trip that they were currently on, they fell.

Together.

* * *

Author's Notes: I know you all wanted Naruto to tell Sakura he was gay or something, or he had a boyfriend, but…uh, well, then that would just be an awkward end to a story that took long to progress  
-I know with the title some probably thought there was going to be a 'I love you confession'. Nope, not yet. And I'm sorry I cut it off there, but I felt content with that little romance and couldn't find myself adding anything else.


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter 24 – Sleepless Nights and Daunting Dates

Author's Notes (to answer some things):_  
-Last chapter _wasn't_ a filler chapter. It was actually pretty important as far as their feelings developing are concerned, and the plot. It announces Naruto going on the date, and why._ This_ chapter is a filler chapter__. I added a little something extra to tide you pervy bastards over. It also means I put the assholes in a time machine and pressed fast forward as far as their progression. I think, for rushing it, it wasn't horrible (I wanted it anyway).  
-As far as pairings go, they've been decided a long time ago, as in, when I started the fiction. I would suggest you all stop suggesting pairings. Kakashi's partner isn't mentioned till the end, and even then it's so small you have to freaking squint. Itachi is going to be a lonely anti-social bastard.  
-The fiction will end on chapter 29, with _possible_ bonus chapters.  
(Anymore questions, please feel free to ask…nicely.)_don't_ want to. Anyway, in giving you this taste of something, I _don't_ want to hear you begging for lemons because the plot is more important. Take what I give you and beat me later. _

Disclaimer: I own nothing copyrighted…still. Seeing as I'm poor, I think that's proof enough.

Warning: Sexual content. Beginning of drama. Yeah, that's right. –skips off to watch E3-

Rating: M- because it's a little dirty. That's right, I'm giving you pervs (and I mean it, you guys need to go to a damn doctor) a little taste as best as I can. I'm rushing them… like I

Chapter 24 – Sleepless Nights and Daunting Dates

* * *

Sasuke would have gone peacefully home after Naruto finally got out of the car, if it wasn't for the fact that when the blonde tried to climb through the window, he couldn't exactly make it. In fact, he tried to throw himself in, and fell right back out onto his backside before just simply falling over in the cool and moist grass completely content with going to sleep there.

So the raven cut the engine of the car, and not so gracefully himself, climbed out and made his way to the blonde.

And of course, just as a window was thrown open.

Sasuke was standing next to the splayed out Naruto while Kiba leaned out the open window with a groggy wolfish grin.

The half naked teen propped his head up on his waiting palm while his other arm dangled out the window and whispered into the night, "Too tired to gat back in?"

Sasuke kicked at the blonde's hip lightly while he looked at Kiba and whispered back, "No, felt like taking a nap."

Kiba snickered, "Need any help?"

"I got it."

"I'm sure, Ice Prick." The brunette disappeared through the window before Sasuke could get another word out, which caused the raven to glare towards the window that slid quietly shut.

Sasuke crouched down and teetered a little in his drowsy state while he prodded a scared cheek with a scowl, "Dobe. _Dobe_. Wake. The. Fuck. Up!"

The last jab went straight to Naruto's teeth and had the teen sitting up straight and had Sasuke toppling over in a dodge so he didn't get his lip busted once more.

The raven sighed when he felt his shirt instantly dampen, and thanked anyone that his pants were at least thick enough it would take a moment.

Sasuke stood up quickly to find Naruto rubbing his eyes while still sitting in the moistened grass and took one step to stand directly next to him.

"Stand up, Dobe." Sasuke whispered.

Naruto looked up, attempting to glare and looking as though he was pouting, "The window is too high."

The raven swooped down and hoisted the blonde up to a standing position easily before chuckling, "No, Naruto, you're just too tired."

It took a moment for Sasuke to get the blonde through the window, but finally with one rough shove and a rather unceremonious landing on a tired tan face, Naruto was finally in his own room.

Sasuke poked his head into the barely illuminated darkness and whispered to the stumbling blonde, "Are you going to be alright?"

Onyx eyes watch as the smaller form turned towards the window and tripped over his feet towards the window till he came to rest right in front of it and Naruto's voice spoke, "Can you stay for a little longer?"

The raven could make out Naruto playing with his fingers, the tan digits wrestling in a nervous gesture while he bit his lip, and the raven would bet that the blonde had a hint of pink dusting those tan cheeks.

"Move back, dobe."

Sasuke heaved himself into the window and the two silently took off their shoes and socks, someone shutting the window, before the blonde lead the way to his bed and flopped down in a heap.

The raven gently laid down next to him and frowned at the wet shirt, "You need to change."

Naruto mumbled incoherently as he tried to cross the bridge to sleep, and the raven took it upon himself to press the issue, "Naruto," Sasuke flicked his cheek, "You need to get out of the wet clothes."

The blonde threw up his tan arms straight in the air, barely missing Sasuke's face, "Just take off my shirt and shut the fuck up."

Sasuke sighed, barely hesitating as he grabbed at the bottom of the shirt Naruto wore. The raven tugged the damp shirt up with one hand that switched from one side to the other while the other held up a particularly heavy blonde head and relived him of the cold garment.

Sasuke had seen _glimpses_ of Naruto naked, and of course as the blonde reminded him, more than his fair share. But, as much as he didn't realize it, he never really _looked_.  
The blonde had been in a _towel_ around him for who knows how long, and he never really stared, and he was pretty sure his reasoning was somewhere around, uncomfortable and Naruto catching him and shouting.

Now he could look, and Naruto didn't mind.

The blonde sure as hell _looked_ girly, and left plenty up to the imagination with the baggy clothes and the smaller frame.  
But when it boiled down to it, he was far less girly than Sasuke gave him credit for.  
The raven always noticed the broad shoulders – yes, but the toned stomach that showed light lines of stomach muscles – never thought. His chest was broader than he would have given him credit for before, and Sasuke could now fully see the muscle in his arms that could be passed off for a normal girl. He was thin, but framed out well, and it all fit him just right.

As if one article of clothing made all the difference, Naruto was suddenly awake in realizing what exactly just took place in his bed. He really just _told_ Sasuke to take off his shirt. The blonde balled up his fists by his sides in a nervous gesture while he felt the tips of Sasuke fingers skim across his stomach once the article was removed as if testing before they were gone again.

The blonde jumped when he heard Sasuke's voice next to his ear, having closed his eyes at some point, "Where is your hamper dobe?"

"I don't have one."

Naruto rolled his eyes when he heard Sasuke snort, "Typical."

Naruto shuffled around in his bed to face the raven, turning on his side before Sasuke scooted closer and wrapped his arms around the blonde and ran his hands up a smooth tan back in one fluid motion. Naruto buried his face in the crook of Sasuke's neck while he flung his arm over Sasuke's side.

"Stop being all Mr. Awesome teme, I know you're cold too." Naruto whispered while his hands hesitated as he unhooked himself and gave the raven a look.

Naruto damned Sasuke and his quick actions.

"I'll be fine. I can't show up topless."

Naruto snickered as an image of a Sasuke with boobs flashed in his head, "I have a couple of your shirts…" Naruto's finger tips gripped at the bottom of the shirt and waited for some sign of approval before he felt the raven's soft lips graze his.

The blonde grabbed at the bottom of Sasuke's shirt and tugged lightly while the raven sat up to help the process along while Naruto stripped him of his shirt and lightly tossed it to the ground while the raven gently laid back down.

Naruto let his eyes linger on Sasuke's chest and stomach where he had traced the lines of the muscles earlier in the car, and now it seemed as though someone placed marble and porcelain over the toned body.

Naruto let his fingers swipe across Sasuke's midsection as he stared and let his eyes linger through the dark before the raven snapped him out of it, "Dobe…"

Naruto's eyes snapped to attention at a midnight gaze, "You're shivering, lie down and get under the blanket."

The blonde ducked his head lightly to hide the blush from the embarrassment, even though the darkness hid it, from his staring before flopping down on his side while the raven reached over him and threw the blanket over the two.

The blonde scooted closer while Sasuke draped one arm over Naruto, and tucked the other arm comfortably under his head, and the blonde mirrored his actions as he tucked his head under Sasuke's chin.

It was amazing how natural it came.

Sasuke felt his eyelids working against him and all his Uchiha power while the two laid there in the room in silence, before of course, Naruto broke it. "Hey Sasuke…?"

"Hm?"

"Why don't you just stay?"

Sasuke pulled back, his creeping tiredness leaving the more he knew he had to force himself to talk. "For one thing, your father."

Sasuke smiled at the tickle of Naruto's breath on his face as he watched the blonde laugh quietly, "And another, my parents are in town. It might be easy for me to leave, but if I'm not at the breakfast table in the morning, it's going to be hell."

Sasuke heard the blonde hum in understanding while he rolled over on his back to stare at the ceiling as if to concentrate on something.

"Go to sleep…" Sasuke mumbled as his arm rested across Naruto's stomach.

The blonde grumbled as he slung an arm dramatically over his eyes, "I can't."

The raven eyed the blonde through the darkness, his eyesight completely adjusted, "And just why in the fuck not? You went to sleep on the lawn."

"Because you'll be gone when I wake up."

Sasuke could have eased Naruto's troubled mind easily with one of his famous lines like, '_I'll see you tomorrow dobe_' or '_don't be such a woman_', but the raven couldn't bring himself to say so.

It was always the greatest feeling to be wanted, second only to one other thing.

The raven propped himself up on his forearm to hover over the blonde, making Naruto peak from underneath his arm at the shifting weight of the bed to find Sasuke's face an inch away from his.

The blonde chuckled, "Why…so…serious?"

The raven dropped his forehead onto Naruto's limply, but not to the point it hurt while the blonde laughed, while he himself chuckled. Their breaths mingled of fruity tooth paste and mint burst whatever the raven used, while their eyes stayed open just enough to lock. Naruto threw his arms around Sasuke's neck while a pale hand rested on a shaking-with-laughter stomach.

It was a time stopping moment that linked their old selves with their new selves. It continued their path of changing their relationship, of evolving it.

Something about the intimacy of touching made something click. Like one more little inch and they could kiss. Like their breaths were already linking them, their touches were already pulling them; someone just needed to take the plunge and Sasuke dove in head first.

The raven hesitated with locking lips with Naruto; he wasn't sure if it was because they were both shirtless or because these times actually meant something.  
Their lips finally touched softly, Sasuke's other hand coming down on the other side of the blonde head, and the raven propping himself up on both palms to hover over. Tan fingers slowly worked their way into silky raven hair and found their permanent spots of leverage.

The two would pull back and connect again, and repeat the process over and over in a tender gesture that showed their gentle caring feelings of tender kisses.  
A quick, gentle slip of a tongue along a bottom lip caused Naruto to slam his eyes shut before slowly and hesitantly opening his mouth and allowing Sasuke's tongue to dive into his mouth.

Their tongues wrestled together while their breath strained out through their noses, neither one of them battling for dominance but memorizing the other. The two of them enjoyed the feeling of their heated skin meeting, their chests and stomachs resting peacefully together in a gentle touch, and wrapped themselves in the moment. Sasuke's hand that lay on Naruto's stomach roamed and blindly explored over velvet skin while their tongues mingled and danced together sensually.

The room was filled with heavy strained breathing, their hands roaming, wet kissing and strained moans that were obviously trying to be hidden in the desperate kisses that had escalated.

Naruto yanked his mouth back in a sudden desperate need for air while the hovering raven above explored the pre-exposed tan skin.  
It was the only burning the blonde would take time and time again; Sasuke lips felt like they were fire on his already flushed and heated skin as he attacked his chest instantly. From his chest he went to his stomach.

From his stomach he went to his neck. From his neck he went to his jaw. A kiss here, licking there, sucking there, leaving the blonde arching slightly off the bed, panting, moaning, and cursing that Sasuke held him down. The raven readjusted himself from the side of Naruto to in between his legs slowly, checking; kissing his way up from a pant line up to a thrumming pulse in a tan neck.

Pale digits skimmed over a nipple making the blonde hiss before the blonde began attacking a pale neck himself desperate to do something – anything to Sasuke.  
Sasuke huffed roughly as he lifted his head as he felt Naruto suck and lick gently on his pulse point, his hips rolling unconsciously as his hands gripped at Naruto's hips while their chests skimmed together. The attacking mouth stopped its assault at that movement with a huff and a quiet moan, the blonde's hips moving slightly in a way to ask for the raven to repeat the action.

Sasuke rocked his hips forward, his torso rolling with eyes at the sensation while he bit his lip at the sound that met his ear while the blonde tugged on his hair and pale hands tugged on slim hips in return; Naruto's hips rocking back.

The friction was unbelievable.

The raven lifted his head to have it come to rest forehead to forehead with a tan forehead, their hair mingling and their breaths meeting midair in huffs. Sasuke dipped his head to have them meet in a breathless kiss that was mixed in a groan as the two rocked their hips together as their legs untangled from being wrapped at some point in time. The two rocked their hips together again and again, meeting in pleasure that had the room filling with noises that were growing in volume by the second. Each new thrust sent a wave a pleasure, causing Naruto to arch just slightly and causing tingles of pleasure to race up and down Sasuke's spine, but the constant clothed friction wasn't enough.

The two pulled back together, their hands reaching for the others pants slowly knowing that the clothing would get in their way, knowing they wanted it gone now before never.  
The two tugged their articles of clothing down as best as they could without standing or disconnecting, sharing harsh kissing as their hands struggled to yank down clothes to knees or thighs, someone moaning and someone hissing when erections were exposed.

Naruto lay back flat against the bed, the two of them having sat up at one point while Sasuke situated himself back between his legs and one hand gripped the smaller and perfectly shaped tan hips once more while the other pale hand roamed on a tan thigh; their foreheads resting together once again.

The new bare friction caused the blonde to attempt a feeble grasp at Sasuke's bare shoulders, the pads of his fingers pressing into pale skin and cursing under his breath, the raven huffing roughly while he hovered over the blonde. Naruto chuckled breathlessly; it was barely a grazing touch and it drove them both absolutely wild.

The raven rocked in eagerness for the shooting pleasure that was tingling at his body and building, Naruto meeting him, making the blonde moan his loudest yet.

Sasuke hissed, "Naruto, keep it down."

The blonde knew somewhere deep down past the lust that they were, indeed moving things a little too fast in whatever direction they were going. They had barely shared kisses, and here they were fooling around like it was a common occurrence. Sometimes reasoning doesn't register or matter. The only thing was that neither was protesting or awkward or hesitant; it was welcoming.

The blonde panted with a glare, moving his hips to have their erections graze lightly and send a delightful tingle up Sasuke's spine, "Don't be a little-"

Naruto cut himself off with a gasp, his teeth clamping down on his bottom lip to stifle a moan when he felt the soft fingers of Sasuke graze his shaft heatedly before grasping it and giving it a testing stroke.

Naruto hesitantly moved to rock into the pale hand to have a race of pleasure chase it's way up his spine and stomach before he latched one hand back deep within raven hair and connected their lips, his free hand shakily reached for Sasuke's longing erection.

Sasuke shuttered at the feel of Naruto stroking him while the blonde let out breathily moans into the raven's mouth with each stroke of Sasuke's hand.  
Their hands moved in sync, their sounds were echoing in the other's mouths in heavy pants, their heartbeats thrummed and pounded in their chests to the point the other felt the unhealthy rhythm.

The rhythm of their hands and somewhat playing hips began to become erratic, their eyelids playing with white and their stomach muscles filling with warmth and clenching.  
Naruto arched lightly off the bed and bucked into Sasuke's hand as he reached his climax, moaning something inaudible into the other's mouth just as he felt something hot and sticky shoot into his hand and a curse shoot across his tongue.

The two unlocked their lips, panting, and Naruto felt the bed shake from Sasuke's arms becoming weakened from holding himself in the position so long. The blonde squirmed at the sticky mess on his hand and stomach and let a foul look pass on his face along with the exhausted one, causing the raven to chuckle.

"I'll get a towel…" Sasuke mumbled as his own abused lips grazed against Naruto's.  
The blonde blushed for one reason or another, mumbling something about the one he dropped on the floor from his shower, Sasuke grabbing in a flash and the raven began cleaning up the mess that dirtied their stomachs.

That's when they heard it.

The two of them were cleaning off their hands, their stomachs as clean as they could get without a shower, their pants pulled back on haphazardly when they heard the floorboards upstairs creaking.

Naruto and Sasuke's necks snapped to each other.

The raven jumped from the bed and threw his socks into his pocket and rammed his feet into the wrong shoes while pulling his pants up higher, ignoring the blonde next to him that was adjusting his own pants before running to the window.

Naruto threw open the screen as they heard the footfalls echo off the bottom step, and Sasuke leaned in for one last kiss before practically diving out of the window and the blonde trying to slam it shut as quietly as he could before he dove back into bed.

It was so much strenuous activity for a male after, well, strenuous activity.

Naruto just managed to make himself into a burrito with his covers, facing the wall and holding his breath, when his door creaked open and Kakashi stood in the doorway tired and bored looking.

The older man scanned the room for a few seconds, his eyes landing on his son before folding his arms over his bare chest, "Tell Sasuke we'll wash his shirt for him."

Naruto's eyes doubled in size, but he remained playing his part. He'd play dead if he had to than face his father about doing sexual things with Sasuke.

"And you can use the shower son…" Kakashi paused with a merry twinkle, "No more cold ones for you, huh?"

Naruto sat bolt upright just as the door clicked shut; the blonde intending to beg his father to keep his damn mouth shut and at least not torture Sasuke when he came over. To not chase him away. Perhaps to spare poor Kiba and his mind and his sanity. Maybe, just maybe, to not let him run around and manage to tell the girls that he and Sasuke got down and dirty.

Naruto knew that Kakashi was unstoppable, and the fact that the blonde had woken his father from his wonderful and peaceful sleep signed for his death.  
He could already picture Kakashi upstairs with his earphones on till he deemed it safe to come downstairs and harass them.

The blonde threw off the covers and toed his way to his dresser and extracted Sasuke's shirt that he had promised before going to the window with a smidgeon of hope.

Naruto threw open the window and looked back once more hesitantly towards the door to his room before calling out his window in a loud whisper, "Sasuke?"

A ruffled raven head and a quick-draw pale hand popped out from underneath the window; the hand grabbing the back of the blonde head and the raven locking lips with the concerned blonde.

Sasuke pulled back with the light smack of the lips, resting his forehead against the blonde, "You want to get caught, don't you?"

The blonde wanted to fill him in on the conversation he had missed through the window, and supply him with a smile and a '_too late_', but spared him the worry of evil Kakashi for another day.

Mainly tomorrow.

Naruto smiled, and draped a shirt over his head, "You'll need this."

The raven smirked, laid one last kiss on a tan cheek, a headed for his car in the dark.

Tonight, things could end perfectly.

* * *

"You, my friend, have issues."

Kiba called from down the hallway from his position in the living room on the couch while Naruto busied himself in the bathroom.

Sunday's were always different now that Naruto was in a skirt during the week.

"Do you need help?" Hinata called lightly.

"Not yet! And Kiba, I _explained_ everything, I couldn't get out of it. I need to do it." The blonde called back as he poked his head out the bathroom door to call down the hallway.

His hair was once again held back by a folded bandana, his hair once again littered with barrettes and hair ties. His face - tan skin was covered with a layer of thick paste of green, a tooth brush hanging out the side of his mouth and foam coating the corners.

A blonde head disappeared into a bathroom just as the front door opened; Kiba and Hinata turning to stare seeing as Kakashi was in his second office upstairs talking to his computer screen as if it would make his work appear from thin air.

Apparently, in Naruto's household, it was now a trend for everyone to simply walk in on their own accord.

Sasuke looked towards the couch and inclined his head, his face void of sunglasses on the rainy day, "Dobe?"

Hinata giggled and Kiba pointed down the hall before calling after the raven in warning, "I wouldn't go in there!"

"It can't be that-"

Naruto turned to stare wide eyed at Sasuke in horror. The raven wasn't supposed to be there for another two hours.

Naruto's hand was gripping his toothbrush as his body faced forward, looking towards Sasuke, his other hand playing with his hair. A smaller shirt lightly clung to his form, his boxers hiked up on his hips, and a layer of _Veet_ covering his legs.

Sasuke's eyes roamed from the paste covering the frozen face to the smelly hell that was covering Naruto's legs, and catching sight of the discoloring mark on the blonde's neck before he turned on his heel.

Kiba called with a laugh, "I told you!"

The raven came to sit in the living room, to perhaps get away from the insanity, just as Kakashi came waltzing down the stairs, waving at Sasuke with a malicious intent before he began his mortifying attack on everyone in the household.

Sunday's were weird, Monday's were mortifying.

Tomorrow was going to be a new Monday though.

* * *

Sasuke straightened his tie in the mirror, a sigh of relief escaping his lips.

The Uchiha mansion was back to order.

Sasuke's door slammed open; Itachi came in ballroom dancing with an imaginary partner and humming an imaginary elegant tune.

Well, simply as much order as Uchiha's could have.

The young teen glared over his shoulder as his brother bowed to an imaginary audience and wiped away imaginary tears, his hand rolling in the air and waving off nonexistent calls for an encore.

"What is it Itachi?" Sasuke growled.

The young raven had been enjoying the alone time in his room while his parents pestered his sibling about every little waking detail about his life, and Itachi was too polite of a son to shoo them away.

Sasuke was enjoying a morning of getting ready and thinking over the previous day. Sunday was _weird_ – yes – but it was also enjoyable.

The four of Kiba, Hinata, Sasuke and Naruto finally roamed outside of the house on the cloudy Spring day. They needed to run the hell away from Kakashi. They went to see some movie that had Hinata cooing and Naruto laughing, Kiba had fallen asleep while Sasuke hit the blonde repeatedly upside the head. The four eventually ended up at a small ice cream stand and Sasuke soon found ice cream shoved in his face, and Naruto soon found himself running for his life. Déjà vu worked for them.

The four eventually split off into pairs; Naruto and Sasuke wondered off walking around the rich part of town while Kiba and Hinata went towards the young girl's house so Kiba could meet the parents.

Sasuke and Naruto talked about random things once more, what they liked and what they didn't. They talked about their parents. The blonde spoke of aspirations and Sasuke mumbled his own secret ones. Their bond tightening with each word and step.

Eventually the raven's thoughts led away from the goodnight kiss at their parting path to his feeling of anxiety over the date Naruto had today.

The one he had with Sakura.

He'd bet his bottom damn dollar Itachi…

"Oh I _know_ something. I take that back…I know everything." Itachi smirked.

Sasuke cursed under his breath before turning around and glaring at his brother, opening his mouth to challenge him, "Oh re-"

"There is obviously a rather large bump in love road. Oh, and by the way, keep up the sexual activities dear little brother, its working wonders. Not only are you easier to deal with, but you can actually put your tie on straight."

Itachi walked awkwardly out of the room a few minutes later with a few new bumps and bruises to add to his collection to come.

* * *

Naruto walked hand in hand with Sasuke on Monday morning underneath a large umbrella, Kiba and Hinata walked in front of them chatting away in the early morning hours.  
Naruto's eyebrows were newly waxed, his legs were once again hair free, and his face was again clean shaven. His nails were manicured, his hair was of course perfect, and his make-up was never out of place.  
Thanks to the talented work of his father, the mark on his neck was easily covered, but not without a few teasing remarks and speeches on safe sex and reminders of being caught. Kiba had magically disappeared with Hinata and Sasuke followed, all trying to steer clear of the conversation again.

The blonde stood outside the large looming gates of school and waved at the pink-haired girl as she waved excitedly at him while Ino tossed her hand in the air. It seemed Sakura was excited about something and it was now grinding on Ino's nerves.

The blonde turned back to his raven who was glaring off in the other direction, Naruto opening his mouth to say something joking before Sasuke cut him off.

"Keep the umbrella. It's supposed to rain all day, and I'll just get it from you tomorrow morning."

Naruto frowned and prodded the raven's stomach with his index finger roughly, "You… aren't coming over at all?"

Sasuke had thought it over while he sat at the empty breakfast table that fine morning. He knew that when it boiled down to it, the one and only Sasuke Uchiha was _scared_ to walk over to Naruto Uzumaki's house and face him after his date.

Simply because he was afraid Naruto would remember exactly why he started chasing Sakura, and the raven just couldn't bare that, not to mention voice it. He would have to wait till night passed and a new day came till he could pass it off as it never happened.

The raven's glare lessoned a fraction at the hurt look Naruto gave him, but his mind was already made up, "I'll see you tomorrow."

The raven swooped down, one hand passing off the umbrella while his lips pressed against Naruto's temple.

Before the blonde could snap and curse and tell him off, the raven turned and walked off through the pouring rain towards his own school.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Naruto tucked his skirt underneath himself politely and flicked a pigtail over his shoulder before letting his eyes land on his nails once before letting them flick to a head of bright pink.

A blonde head was instantly propped up in what seemed like eager anticipation as he scooted his seat closer in was seemed like a girl excited for gossip, "Okay! Spill!"

Naruto mentally squirmed at his own girlish lingo and voice; day by day as a girl he felt he was losing his manhood.

He flushed lightly as a flash of a thought passed by in thinking of what happened with Sasuke.

He wasn't – at all.

" – And so we made plans to go out to dinner and a movie!" Sakura let out a delighted giggle mixed with a squeal when Naruto snapped himself out of his stupor.

Naruto let out a giggle as he threw his hand over his mouth, "Oooh, what movie? Where are you going to eat?"

Shit. They hadn't planned.

Naruto simply yelled/mumbled plans to meet him at his/Kiba's house.

The girl gave off a nonchalant shrug, "Don't know…"

Naruto mentally crossed his fingers and prayed she was a typical girl, and by that he meant…

"I hope we go see that new romance movie that's out. And I'd love to go to that little restaurant on Sunset. It's my favorite." Sakura said in a long sigh as she stared off in a dream.

…Say exactly what she wanted to someone else in hopes to get it.

"If I know Kiba," Naruto said as he faced the front of the classroom, Sakura looking at her from the corner of her eyes in hope, "He'll work something out."

* * *

Author's Notes: I'll say it… I've been damn nervous to post this chapter since I started writing it. People are so critical of anything citrus it just makes me nervous… not to mention it's the start of the drama. Please, be gentle.  
GUH! The first part of the chapter… -grabs lighter- I'll burn it to the deepest pit in hell!  
I have to say I'm interested to see the reviews at the _end_ of the fiction, I don't think anyone is seeing what is coming. I'm pretty excited. Thanks for all the support guys… the reviews have been wonderful! Love to all!


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter 25 – The Rift in Perfection

Author's Notes: I have reasons, like always. As explained at the bottom of the page.  
As usual (Which some aren't used to), I'm doing exactly what you didn't expect. Hate me, love me, kill me. You need me to get to the end.  
And guys, stop bashing Sakura so hard. She isn't the wicked witch of the world alright. Calm down.

Disclaimer: Nothing. Nothing that is copyrighted that is mentioned here I do not own.

Dedication: Everyone who reviewed to help me get to over 700!!! You all make my shitty week so much better.

Warnings: _D-R-A-M-A_ begins. Enjoy.

Chapter 25 – The Rift in Perfection

* * *

Naruto let his umbrella fly open at the end of school, and let Sakura huddle underneath as they waited on Ino and Hinata.

"What are you doing this afternoon?" Sakura asked politely as she huddled closer when a few drops assaulted her.

The blonde blinked his eyes before thinking of the first thing that came to mind, "Going out with Sasuke. We had a date planned after we finished our work."

The girl nodded in a slow understanding, her lips in a thin line in a thinking sort of way while she stared off at the ground, and the blonde swallowed hard in worry.

"He really likes you, doesn't he?" Sakura asked suddenly.

Naruto flushed and cursed himself for the girly action, "I can't speak for him, but, through his words and actions, I think so."

Sakura smiled kindly in what looked like a pained gesture, "I'm glad. It's hard to find someone good these days."

The blonde furrowed his perfect brow, "What do you mean?"

He was genuinely curious. Sasuke had plenty of flaws, he was pretty sure he was the only one smart enough to see them for what they were, and it took some time before he got to this '_good_' she was speaking of. Sakura sure as shit needed to take Sasuke off of that pedestal she held him on.

Sakura shrugged and ripped Naruto out of his musings of making Sasuke into a human and not some god like Sakura did, "He just seems like he would be the type to treat you well."

Naruto remembered the teasing – all of it. The name calling – which he still gets, then the butt grabbing, and not to mention…!

"I've just never dated a … good guy? I guess you'd call it that." Sakura mumbled.

Naruto huddled under the large umbrella when the wind blew another direction and his back began to get pounded with rain, "What do you mean, Sakura? I'm lost."

"This Kiba guy," She began and Naruto shuffled on the spot, "seems like someone I can actually date. If Kakashi can make Hina-chan that happy, then I'm hoping Kiba-kun can make me that happy. I guess…I guess I understand that Sasuke-kun won't notice me anymore. He never really noticed me in the first place. You're the first girl he actually took notice to, and, well…Kiba is the first guy who _really_ noticed me."

Naruto shook his head lightly to show his confusion, "Sakura, I'll bet my bottom dollar that's a lie."

Sakura let out a sweet giggle, "I mean, notice _me_ Naru-chan. Not for my body. _I_ asked him to go out on a date, not him. He didn't say yes ogling me like a peace of meat. Did you know this is the first guy to actually go out on a date with me? I know this sounds weird because I barely know him, but guys around here usually aren't the greatest, but he seems different. He doesn't seem the type to only date me for sex."

The blonde swallowed, "Guys actually…?"

He wasn't that type. Sure, he stared at Sakura, he admired her body, but he would _never_ go as low as to _only_ date her for sex. His father might have been the second biggest pervert in the world, but he raised him right.

Sakura looked up at him with wide confused green eyes, "Come on Naru-chan, you never had guys act like complete assholes towards you?"

When Naruto heard Sakura act like this was the most natural thing in the world, that men were to treat women unfairly, something inside hit him roughly.

Right now he was seeing the innocent Sakura who he had originally liked, who he had pursued and adored. He now knew before he pushed her away and broke her heart with '_Kiba_' and ruined the friendship between her and '_Naru-chan_', that he had to give this girl beside him the date of her life.

* * *

"Can I have one?" Sasuke asked under Shikamaru's umbrella in the back lot next to his car.

The other teen turned to give his friend a lost look and a questioning one while he fumbled to light his cigarette. "Alright Uchiha, you need to tell me what in the fuck is wrong with you. I let you smoke one time last year when your parents came home for a month and I thought you might possibly have a mental breakdown after you lost all Uchiha-ness and had a panic attack…which I haven't mentioned untill now. Like I promised. Troublesome prick. What in the hell is wrong?"

Pale fingers snatched a stick and flipped it through the digits with a long sigh before snatching the lighter without so much as a sideways glance, "I get you're a genius Shikamaru, but you'd never be able to figure this one out."

The two watched as Temari's car only pulled into the parking lot, and Shikamaru gave his friend a look of disappointment, "Really? Fucking rocket science, Uchiha."

The raven took a pull from the stick and grimaced, "I don't know how you smoke these things…they're _horrible_."

Shikamaru sighed, "I take it that you and Naruto have reached a dilemma? Or really, it's been there all along, and you just thought I didn't know."

Sasuke eyed his friend as the girl quickly approached through the pouring rain, "I hate when you dance around shit, Nara."

Shikamaru smiled at the girl as Temari was but a few steps away, "I take it Naruto's cross-dressing act is finally causing some real problems between the two of you."

* * *

Naruto was dropped off by Hinata after school while Ino went to Sakura's house to help her get ready. The blonde looked helplessly to his clock and realized he didn't have a long time to get ready and try to figure out how to afford the most expensive place in town.

Yesterday he was going to treat her to fast food and a two dollar flick, obnoxiousness with a side of sarcasm.

Naruto sighed because he realized, no one really deserved that.

Before he tripped and fell on his face like he seemed to do every other day, he knew he should treat her to a wonderful date before supposedly crushing her heart.

Naruto yanked out some shirt and his wonderful boxers that he thanked for every night before he fell asleep, and grabbed an old faded pair of jeans before he threw them on in a blink of an eye.

Not to mention without falling.

He already knew it was going to be awkward with Sakura driving because she had offered to pick him up, and now the blonde had to go stand in front of his best friend's house why he himself wasn't even home.

Kiba and Hinata had gone off on another date.

The blonde scratched at his head in the middle of his room, absently wondering why in the hell were a bunch of high school students going out on dates on a _Monday_.

Some things are better left unanswered.

Naruto gave one last look at the screen of his cell phone while he hastily wrote a note to his father, a large part of wanting Sasuke to call while the other, for some reason unknown, wish he wouldn't.

The blonde reached his hand up on top of the refrigerator and hoped his dad would understand from borrowing from his book fund. His dirty novel fund really, and Naruto technically knew Kakashi wouldn't understand.

The blonde tucked his phone in his pocket and walked over to Kiba's house to get himself in another tangle.

Absently, Naruto wondered how long it would take to get himself caught in this web and trip in the knots.

* * *

After a rather heated argument in the back lot of Academia, Temari finally agreed to return to her car so Shikamaru and Sasuke could talk.

Only after she insulted Sasuke seventeen different ways and attempted to swing at him for making her come all this way through the rain in a white shirt.

After the teen was running back to her car, onyx eyes landed on one teen with the coolest demeanor possible when talking about his best friend dating a guy cross-dressing.  
Sasuke hesitated, his mouth stuttering silently before Shikamaru talked for him.

"I am a genius," He drew like it answered everything, "And some things are obvious. Troublesome. I did figure it out before you, but I kept my mouth shut when you said you were dating him."

Sasuke took a pained drag of the cigarette with a grimace before flicking it away with a cough. He'd find another way to get rid of his stress.

"At first I could tell it was to keep girls away, even though you put him up as target practice, but I noticed real feelings start to develop, and I didn't want to interfere. And now, here you are, head over heels and in a dilemma. You, Sasuke, are such a fucking woman. Troublesome asshole."

The young Uchiha snapped his mouth shut that had taken to being in the open position before he leaned back against the wet car in his spare uniform, his original soaking one was now in his bag.

"Should I start from the beginning?" Sasuke eyed his friend out of the corner of his eyes.

Shikamaru finished a text message and then watched Temari's hand wave from her window and then watched as her car started and disappeared from the lot.

"Alright Uchiha, but it's a hundred an hour and in someplace dry and warm."

The young teen spared a chuckle, "And your smoking preference?"

"You'll be bitching, let's move."

* * *

The drive was far less awkward than Naruto even imagined, even when the blonde explained the nail polish and waxed brows as a blame on '_Naru-chan_'.

How that was awkward explaining.

Sakura talked enough for the both of them, and Naruto couldn't help but absently think it had to be some type of accomplishment to out talk him.

It was pleasantly nice.

The only person that was ever really able to keep up with him in conversation was Kiba, and even that had taken practice. For the longest time it was someone talking over the other, or arguments breaking out over nothing, or the other not letting the other speak.

It was now just second nature to talk in blended sentences at top speed at the same time and catch every word.

The movie.

Naruto twitched.

He couldn't stand romance movies. They usually made him laugh at all the cooing, gushing and crying the women did in the theater. So when they arrived at the movies and he saw the action packed comedy he'd been dying to see sitting next to the fluffy ball of hell Sakura mentioned, he wanted to cry.

He felt like he was handing over his sanity when he handed over the ticket he bought her. After they got their drinks, and walked into theater room twelve, he caught sight of the other unfortunate souls. Men were sitting next to women looking around as if searching for an escape route, the girls prodding them for conversation and attention.

Naruto wanted to die.

It was easy holding a normal conversation in the theater room with Sakura about random things till the previews started. It was easy to get through half the movie without laughing or falling asleep – mostly.

But when Sakura's hand brushed his, he knew he was fucked.

He pretended he didn't notice, squinting at the screen and acting as if the movie was amazingly interesting while the girl one screen ranted on about something he hadn't quite caught before he felt Sakura do it _again_.

He knew he could turn and be jerk, and ask her if something was wrong, or if she had an itch or something insanely stupid like that. He knew he could pull it off.  
When he turned to look at her and saw her looking at the screen in determination, a blush to been seen through the dark room covering her face and neck, Naruto knew he couldn't be an asshole.

Somewhere, in the back of his mind, he knew he'd hate himself later for this.

* * *

Dark pools of black watched fingers across from him play with shapes carelessly, finally coming to form a diamond almost calmingly.

"Do you really need to _think hard_ and _concentrate_ to speak?" Sasuke interrupted their conversation to address his friends' odd quark.

"Troublesome." Shikamaru muttered almost darkly at the fact that he was speaking more this year than he had his entire life.

Sasuke knew that Shikamaru was talking more than ever, mostly because of him, and because of what was going on with Naruto.

"Hn."

"So, then you kissed him?" Shikamaru rubbed at his temples with an exasperated sigh when his fingers pulled away, needing to calm the upcoming headache.

A cigarette was floating dangerously close to his hair while his eyes were slammed shut to fend off a rather persistent headache that only seemed to come when something was too troublesome or talking seemed to come to be more than just a sentence.

"Yes." Sasuke glared after his eye roll.

"Why?"

The teen shrugged, "To prove my point I suppose."

Shikamaru took a drag from the stick before slamming it in the ashtray, "You Uchiha's. Never one's with words but actions."

Sasuke smirked down at his soup at the true to the word statement. "I'm getting better."

Shikamaru rolled his eyes, his fingers playing with shapes once again, "Because of Naruto, now keep going."

Sasuke sighed, "That day at the school when he caused Chouji to have breakdown…"

Shikamaru snorted, "Troublesome. The guy killed _two_ bags of his chips. You expect Chouji to just be alright?"

Sasuke chuckled, "Well, Naruto had an outburst."

The other teen rolled his eyes yet again and lit another cigarette, the smoke trailing oddly from the movement his fingers made before it was swiped to his lips, and back to the odd habit of calming himself. "I'm so shocked." He drew sarcastically.

"He, in a rather round about way, told me he was confused about how he felt for me."

"And thus, this was born…" Shikamaru waved his hand lazily in the air.

Sasuke glared more at his drink than at his friend, "Again, you have no idea."

"No. I don't."

Sasuke shot the teen a withering glare. "Do you even know _why_ Naruto was doing all of this? The cross-dressing?"

At the shake of the head, Sasuke decided to answer, "He was trying to get closer to Sakura, and yes, I know it wasn't well thought out."

"Then you came in and ruined his fun, Prince of Darkness." Shikamaru smiled playfully.

"He's on a date with her." Sasuke finally snarled to get to the point.

Shikamaru sat up straight, "Back up and let's try this again."

Sasuke talked and Shikamaru did his best to listen, but seeing as there were no clouds in site in the restaurant, he had no other option. Sasuke tried to explain everything from the beginning, how everything happened so fast and he still wasn't exactly sure how it happened. The two ignored the couple being seated on the other side of the glass that was to separate the smoking and the non-smoking while the young Uchiha ended on the explanation between luring Sakura in to Naruto, the two of him and Naruto beginning to see each other, and the next morning Naruto agreeing to a date.

"Why did you let him?"

Sasuke sighed, "I understood why. I…" He hesitated and cut himself off.

"Will never admit to being afraid of losing someone you care for."

Onyx eyes glared while he listened to his friend continue talking, the usually silent teen only seeming to talk around a select few, and right now he was irritated he was one of them.  
Sasuke watched as his friend's eyes look at his own fingers that now played with a diamond shape.

Shit.

"Never felt this before, have you? It's positively terrifying, and you don't even know why. Mr. Figure-it-all-out-Uchiha can't put his finger on this one, and it's scaring him even more. You're supposed to be icy and impassive, and here comes some moron who works his way into your life and what I assume is your heart. You know that little black rock that's wedged in your chest? The one thing that makes you and breaks you is your feelings, those things you deny you have, and he holds yours in the palm of his hand. You _don't_ know what he'll do. You _don't_ know if he'll return every little feeling. You _don't_ know if he'll choose her over you, and you can't be a man and admit that you're fucking scared because that's just how _you_ are.

"You don't know if you're more scared about him having a bad time or a good time on that date, either. He could be upset it went bad or happy it went bad. A good time could mean he pushed Sakura away or because he enjoyed himself. It can go too many ways and you don't know how to handle it. It's called love jackass, and you might want to wrap your troublesome head around it."

Sasuke pulled himself together enough to comment, "I'm not _in_ love with him-"

Shikamaru rolled his eyes, "You're getting there you troublesome idiot. Maybe if you let go of the fear a little you'll be able too."

Sasuke slid his eyelids shut lightly, "When did you tell her?"

Shikamaru actually spared the energy and laughed, "Two days ago."

The young Uchiha rolled his eyes, "Two days ago you wouldn't have given m-"

Sasuke stopped when he was in mid sentence at the sound of a loud obnoxious laugh, that to him sounded wonderful, mingling with a giggle that sounded to him like nails on a chalkboard.

The other teen knew that giggle all too well himself, he heard it a lot mixing in with Ino's before he met Temari's wonderful chime laughter.

He didn't have to be a genius to know that Naruto and Sakura were on the other side of the iced glass.

"I can't believe they put us so close to smoking." She complained, and the two saw her hand wave off non-existent smoke.

"I thought you said a friend of yours smokes? Sasuke's best friend?" Naruto asked back casually as he threw his elbows on the table.

"He does and it smells awful! He's a nice guy and all, but I just hate the smell. If you meet him, don't tell him I said this, but I really don't know how he got Temari. The girl Naru-chan told you about?"

Naruto let out a rather awkward chuckle, "From what Naru-chan tells me, Temari is wonderful, and from what Sasuke tell me, Shikamaru is just as good. They sound perfect for each other."

Shikamaru nodded in Sasuke's vision as they both stared at the iced glass as if they could see through it, and then snorted.

"How?" Sakura asked genuinely curious sounding.

"Well, Naru-chan says Temari is bossy, pushy, and loud and she has that sweet and caring side that she shows on occasions. Shikamaru is lazy and doesn't let anything get to him, and Sasuke says he has those rare moments when he really is nice. I think they sound like they were made to counter balance each other."

Shikamaru's eyebrows rose, "He read more into it than even I did."

Sakura giggled, "Wow Kiba-kun! I never thought of it like that…What are you a match maker or something?"

Sasuke watched as Sakura reached out the shadow of her hand across the table, and watched Naruto take it in his, and he felt like he had been punched as hard as someone could throw into his gut.

"I'm just good at reading people."

"Well…" Sakura blushed, "What…vibes or whatever do you get from me?"

Naruto chuckled, "Something I will never forget, that one's for sure."

Bright blue eyes just caught sight of Sasuke's form as he stormed out of the restaurant.

* * *

Shikamaru followed Sasuke easily, and even spared Naruto an easy wave before leaving and the blonde fell relatively silent after that. He let Sakura hold up most of the conversation like she did in the car, and he mentally nit picked things when he wasn't worrying.

He wasn't sure whether or not Sasuke had followed him there or not, but seeing as he went there on a whim, and Sasuke was with Shikamaru, he was betting it was bad luck.  
When Sakura dropped him off, he could tell she was waiting for a kiss while she played with her lips and batted her eye lashes.

After Naruto made a hasty escape and made a fool out of himself with shaking her hand, he stumbled out of the car and made his way towards Kiba's house awkwardly till he heard her car fade off in the distance.

Kakashi was busy on the phone when Naruto walked in the front door and spared him a light wave while he ran to his room in his haste.

Sasuke didn't pick up a single one of his calls, and eventually, Sasuke's phone was cut off.

* * *

Author's Notes (long and extensive):  
-Well…for those of you who are now leaving…it was nice while it lasted. Pleasure, and sorry you didn't want to stick it out, because it gets pretty damn good. Everyone knows Nevi has _crazy methods_ to her over-the-top madness, and well, it always turns out wonderful according to you all. SO, to everyone staying, see you soon.  
-For those of you who want to beat me, torture me, kill me and so on - please stay on the line as a _muse_ will be with you shortly. Shortly, as in, after they beat me for throwing them to the mob…  
I _swear_ I have reasons. I swear… I know you don't want to listen and you want to kill me… but…  
-_And_ Sakura? I thought no NaruSaku…there isn't. He held her hand, and if you count that… then, well, I've paired up with a lot of my friends. Honestly, there is a reasoning behind his sentence. Points, cookies and love to people who can figure it out.  
And _no_, Sasuke isn't a little emo bastard with no feelings. Writer's out there… stop treating him like that!


	26. Chapter 26

Chapter 26: To Break Everything

Author's Notes: I took a shot at Fall Out Boy. Yeah, I went there. Please, don't jump at me because I made a joke and they might possibly be your all time favorite band. This is me telling you what I did… please, just let it go.

Also: I updated this _extremely_ early simply because I promised someone. This won't be the case with the next chapter. I need time to finish the last chapter so it doesn't sneak up on me.

One last thing: Thank you for all the amazing reviews guys. You all are awesome.

Disclaimer (because I haven't been doing it): I don't own anything…nope…nothing.

Chapter 26: To Break Everything

* * *

Sasuke never showed up Tuesday morning.

According to Temari, Shikamaru said he just didn't want to come to school. Naruto had yet to get more than his voicemail when calling him, and once he finally decided to skip out on fourth period and walk all the way to Sasuke's house, no one answered.

Naruto wasn't fazed by walking all the way to Sasuke's house in heels; he could get over that (and the blisters), but the fact that it was pouring down rain grinded on his nerves a little.  
Whoever made up the rule that 'Spring' and 'showers' had to go together, he decided, needed a good punch to the face.

Least the bastard could do was give him a chance to explain, a second to apologize, and a minute to set things back on track.

He understood why Sasuke was so mad, because he knew how it had looked. Here Naruto was supposed to be pushing Sakura away, and there he was looking cozy with her. The blonde just kept hoping that his afternoon of kindness didn't effect his new found _real_ relationship with Sasuke.

When Naruto really thought about it, the thought terrified him that he might have screwed up the first good thing he ever had going for him, just because he possibly couldn't let a crush go.

He ran that over in his head all day.

Whether it was a kind hearted gesture or the fact that, maybe deep down he hadn't gotten over his crush.

* * *

Sasuke listened as Shikamaru skillfully picked the locks to the front door as he stood in front of it after he wondered the house deep in thought. It was by chance he walked by the door when his best friend was committing a crime.

The young Uchiha approached the door and undid the dead bolt with a snap before pulling the door open and watched his lazy friend roll in with a '_thud_' and a groan.  
His gaze flicked up from the floor in the entryway and threw up a lazy wave, "Rainy day…"

"No good clouds…" Sasuke mumbled.

Shikamaru managed to get up with a lot of effort, onyx eyes rolling at obvious movements in laziness, "Did you have to pick the locks?"

The other teen dusted himself off before dropping his bag and umbrella by the door and discarding his shoes next, "Ah, but you got the last one."

Sasuke glared with a huff, "There are _four_ with an alarm system."

Shikamaru shrugged with a dull and bored voice he simply replied, "I'm not cheep, but I'm fun."

The young Uchiha turned on his heel and began walking to some part of the large house, "What do you want?"

"A best friend can't check up on his troublesome friend?" Shikamaru followed with his hands shoved in his pockets, his face towards the ceiling. He knew the house like his own, and he could hear Sasuke's footfalls as his guidance.

The young Uchiha walked through the kitchen, barely stopping as he grabbed this and snatched that quickly and then continued his short journey to wherever it was he was going.

Shikamaru sighed when he entered the large living room that was barely ever occupied, and was only used by them.

Mikoto had the ceiling painted, the day fading into the night, one large portion covered in realistic white clouds over an endless light blue sky before fading off to wisps that barely contained fictional stars.

Shikmaru shook his head lightly, "Trying to distract me?"

Sasuke chuckled falsely, "Of course not."

"He's been asking about you all day. Temari was going mad." Shikamaru dropped onto a couch and remained staring at the frozen sky.

Sasuke remained silent.

"Did you give him a chance to explain himself? Maybe there was a reason why he said what he said and did what he did? Or did you immediately assume the worst? I mean, you do trust him more than anyone else, and don't bullshit me. I'm exhausting myself with these speeches. I haven't talked this much since I was five."

The young Uchiha tossed a drink and chips in Shikamaru's lap before sitting on the opposite end of the couch.

"Just stop being an asshole and go talk to him. You're less troublesome when you're ignoring me in a good way."

"Hn."

"Uchiha…" Shikamaru drew as he ripped open the bag of chips and gazed at the ceiling, "Why don't you grow the hell up and go talk to him you troublesome asshole. Because you can't truly fall in love unless you stop running from the fear."

"Hn."

"Troublesome."

* * *

"What in the hell are you watching?" Kiba made a disgusted face towards the television.

Naruto shrugged, his head propped up on his hand, "Something on _Vlad the Impaler_."

Kiba scooped up the remote and quickly change the channel, a hockey game showing in front of their eyes while the brunette flopped on the couch. "Playoff season. 'Wings will take it again."

"Icing." Naruto said in a drone voice barely a second before the referee blew his whistle and threw his signal in the air.

"Caps did horrible, huh? Like they tried to lose…" Kiba pushed for a conversation, a reaction. Naruto loved sports. It was loud and in your face, just like him. Something to quickly get excited over easily, to become passionate over something simple and that was Naruto. Something that could slow down his never ending energy, and well, everyone just begged for that.

It was how they grew to know each other short of being neighbors when the blonde showed up in the neighborhood. Little League this and that, anything a little boy could get his energy out and dirty over. It was something they knew to exist between them when Naruto was still enrolled in Konoha Public High; they were on all the teams they could be together because that was what they knew. Now here he was, not giving one damn about something he usually screamed at the television over.

"Cross Check." Naruto pointed out in a bored voice.

Kiba turned to the screen to watch a player skate to serve his penalty, and frowned when he didn't listen to Naruto's usual cackle about grown men in time out.

"What happened?" Kiba asked in a defeated tone.

Naruto hadn't said a word to anyone, not a thing. Even the prodding of Kakashi that provoked an outburst was easily sidestepped with a shrug and quick feet. He was guessing Kiba noticed something was wrong this morning with his attitude, and maybe caught on a little more when Sasuke didn't show up.

Hinata most likely called Kiba about him skipping out on school in the rain, and then never returning, and easily pointing out that he had asked about Sasuke.

Naruto screamed 'Obvious'.

Just, minus some finer details.

"Oh, well, you know. Naruto Uzumaki at his best. I come up with a crazy idea, right?" Naruto turned to glance at his friend quickly before looking back at the screen as Kiba muted the television while intermission blared.

"So, after '_loving_' the girl of my dreams for long enough, I pursue her, right? I cross-dress as a Madame Francis's High School student just to get close to her. This girl who I thought I loved. I went as far as throwing my best friend and father in the cross hairs just to _attempt_ to get close to her. So, I do. How? By meeting a bastard by the name of Sasuke Uchiha."

The brunette frowned as Naruto continued on in a tone that wasn't like Naruto at all. He heard it maybe twice the entire time they knew each other. Once, when talking about his mother, and the other, about the scars on his cheeks.

"So, Sasuke and I used each other I guess you could say. In a way, I knew Sakura liked him because he spelled it out for me. So I thought, if I stayed close enough, I'd get close to her. He wanted to get rid of pestering girls. In the end, something shed a new light. I don't know what. I ended up liking someone else. I made up reasons and excuses. They were bullshit. So, I just dove in head first." Naruto let out a chuckle, "Totally like me, huh?"

Kiba spared a small smile.

"And then, something happened. This girl who I had been pursuing from the get-go suddenly wants to go on a date with me. I didn't question why, and now that I've had time to look back on it, I should have. It was the real Sakura, not the scheming Sakura that I thought I grew to hate. _So_, not thinking about this guy that I had come to absolutely fall for, for well, all the right reasons, I went. Again, I made up excuses."

Kiba let his eyelids slide shut slowly when he had a feeling he knew what was coming.

"I abused the trust he had in me. I went on this date, with this girl, and admittedly, I had a good time. I remembered all the reasons I liked her in the first place despite the negative things I found out about her along the way. We all have negative sides. Then, Sasuke was there at the restaurant. It was by chance, or really, pure shit luck. I said something that sounded like something else. He won't talk to me, and in all honesty despite how much it hurts, I don't fucking blame him Kiba."

"Naru-"

"I fucked up."

* * *

Kiba stayed for a long while after that.

His mom let him after Kakashi explained Naruto was upset about something he couldn't quite get out of him, and Kiba had managed. She easily softened for someone who was like her second son. So, the two adults hung around the Inuzuka residence, joking wildly, swapping already shared stories, and retelling random things.

So, the two teens sat watching hockey, and with enough prodding, Kiba provoked the usual Naruto. The two fought over teams, yelled at the television at what they thought were bad calls, made fun of players when they couldn't handle what was dished out, and eventually called it a night.

Naruto didn't expect Kiba to comfort him because it wasn't his friends' forte. He didn't expect him to stay as long as he did, but then again, the guy was a good damn friend.

Kakashi came back a moment later and kissed the top of his hand that sat on top of a rather bright blonde hand. It had been the older man's loophole with showing affection towards his son when Naruto decided he was a man at the age of five. With Kakashi never being able to resist ruffling his hair, he simply told his son that he was kissing himself so it didn't count.

Naruto stopped fighting the caring gesture by the time he was five years and two weeks old.

The blonde dragged his feet into his quiet dark room, the only noise being the seemingly never ending rain that was pattering against the window, and the only light was the little bit that barely seeped in from the plug-in light in the hall.

Naruto stripped himself of all his clothes save for his boxers and yanked out a pair of basketball shorts and stumbled into them before ignoring the opened drawer and heading towards his bed.

That was till he about jumped out of his skin when he heard a knocking coming from his window. Naruto eyed his closed blinds with a foul, tired look and figured that Kiba was lingering on the other side in the rain, and the blonde had half a mind to leave him to drown.

He knew it was in his best friends' best intentions to come and check on him, but the blonde needed a moment to himself without people prodding him every five seconds.

He was upset, he was allowed to be. As he yanked up the curtain to yell at his friend to tell him that, only to have his breath catch at the sight of a drenched Sasuke.

Naruto threw open his still broken window (because who would tell a father who would make them _build_ a new one) and pulled up the screen with slippery fingers.

"What in the _hell_ are you doing?"

So much temporarily forgotten in an instant.

Naruto reached his hand out into the rain, which Sasuke's cold, rain slicked hand took.

"Geez!" The blonde hissed, "How long have you been standing there you idiot?"

The blonde should have realized he sounded liked the teen whom he was scolding.

The other teen didn't respond, but silently took the offer to be helped into the room and stumbled and slid through the window that the blonde was pulling him through.

Sasuke's sneakers squeaked against Naruto's hardwood floor when they touched and shuffled awkwardly, water dripped off of him from several different points, and his body shivered involuntarily.

Spring still brought chilled nights.

"_I'm_ the blonde one!" Naruto reprimanded awkwardly, "You're _not_ supposed to stand in the rain like some chicken!"

The other teen remained silent, staring at the floor while Naruto rushed towards his dresser and ripped open his drawers.

He didn't have time to find Sasuke's clothes that he still had; he just wanted to get him warm, dry clothes on him before he caught something unwelcome known as death.

Naruto walked over towards the quiet standing raven and tossed the clothes lightly on the bed with a silent patter before rushing to shut the window and turning back around.

"Don't get all shy on me now, teme, take off those wet clothes."

"Hn"

Naruto felt his heart flutter in his chest as he faced his bed and laid out the clothes neatly for him to pass to Sasuke blindly, and one by one, the clothes were passed off behind his back.

Each article was taken silently, even though Naruto guessed Sasuke wanted to protest the bright orange fox printed boxers. The blonde quickly left after he handed off the biggest shirt he could grab to rush to the bathroom to grab a stack of towels so he could litter the floor and throw one on Sasuke's head.

Naruto gave a weird look when he entered the room, "Academia is for the intelligent! Get out of the cold puddle!"

The blonde shoved the taller teen gently and draped a towel over his head before laying out the towels on the floor to soak up the wetness that had gotten in his room.  
He turned to see Sasuke sitting on the edge of his bed in his large sweat pants that fit like high waters, and his shirt that clung to him gently, while the towel draped over his head.

The blonde grabbed a blanket from the end of his bed and threw it around Sasuke's shoulders with a frown when he didn't move. Naruto crawled on the bed and managed his way behind the raven and up on his knees, grabbing the towel and working his hair damp and frizzy.

"Sasuke…" Naruto began softly, "Stop being so emo. I'm scared I'll find a stick of eyeliner in your bag and a _Fall Out Boy_ CD in your car."

The blonde heard a grunt as he slowed his ministrations with the towel, his voice softening to a whisper, "How long have you been standing there bastard?"

He watched the blanket move around the shoulders shrugging, and he waited for the noncommittal answer of 'hn' before he heard him mutter, "A few hours."

"A few hours!" Naruto barked before looking towards the ceiling, "Do you want to catch something?"

Sasuke shrugged again, and the blonde frowned at the thought of the more distant Sasuke.

Even when they met, they were interactive with each other. Sure, it wasn't always in a positive light with insults, teasing, and a step away from a fist fight every two seconds.  
But now Sasuke wouldn't even look at him, would barely even acknowledge him.

It worried him.

"I just needed to come."

Naruto slowed to a halt with drying Sasuke's head, and he felt the other move underneath his hands, and within his blind stupor he felt the towel being tugged from his grasp.

Yeah, here it came. All the stuff he 'forgot' in 'an instant' came slamming back to beat him senseless.

Naruto just knew, he just knew. It was that whole 'talk' thing he had heard so much about in relationships. Boy oh boy he now knew why people dreaded it.

Sasuke turned to face Naruto who had sat back on his feet limply while his hands folded in his lap, silently waiting, and a pale hand reached up to cup his cheek.

Naruto hissed at the cold touch, "You're like ice…"

Sasuke chuckled quietly, hollowly, "So I've heard."

The blonde snorted, trying to fight away the dread, "Was that a reference to the insults I make? I do believe your brain is frozen if you _attempted_ to make a joke."

Before Naruto could make another comment, Sasuke's lips were on his. He absently registered in the back of his head that he could feel the bed shifting from the raven turning around completely to face him comfortably. He could feel Sasuke's touch begin to warm from the heat radiating from his cheek, and he flinched at the cold when his other hand grabbed at his side.

Somewhere in the back of his mind, Naruto knew it wasn't right – it didn't _feel_ quite right – but something else felt too good to ignore. The way he felt Sasuke's skin heating against his, the smooth feel of his lips as they moved with his own and the way his feather light touches of his fingertips caressed his skin.

Naruto moaned into the kiss as Sasuke's tongue found its way inside the smaller teen's mouth and enticed it into a languid dance. The blonde huffed and let out a small moan when quick hands found their way up his bare tan chest and over his sensitive nipple, grazing it softly before capturing it and teasing it gently.

Naruto found his hands to barely work as he shakily went under the lent shirt and tried to caress the prefect, flawless pale skin that stretched over lean muscle. His mind was fogged with lust as Sasuke situated himself to move comfortably overtop of him, and while Naruto worked his tongue with his, he was half expecting the freezing raven to strip himself of his shirt.

Instead, his tongue receded back to the proper place, his hand slid down in a caressing and caring touch to Naruto's hip, and the kissing trailed off. The heat and passion died, their mouths closing, their lips pecking. Their foreheads finally lay rested one atop the other while Sasuke hovered; Naruto huffed lightly and the raven tugged a smirk on for good measure.

Then, the final blow.

"Naruto…" Sasuke whispered, his dark pools boring into shimmering blue, "I need you to answer one question for me."

The blonde nodded, his throat closing from the horrid sense of foreboding that suddenly overcame him; the look in Sasuke's eyes worried him.

"Naruto," The teen began, blinking slowly, "I need you to tell me if you still have feelings for Sakura."

Something inside his stomach sunk when he heard the words uttered from the perfect lips, and he watched the light pink lips move as they spoke the words – the question – that would come to haunt his existence.

Time ticked on, neither of them knew how much. They stayed like that for awhile. The unspoken answer lingering in the stale air surrounding them. The horrid answer was eating away at them; not able to move, not able to speak, and not able to look at one another in the eye. The blonde felt the anxiety building in his stomach; his muscles clenching, the sensation of falling building, the twisting sensation eating at him, and the nausea almost overwhelming. He felt the pricks tap at the backs of his eyes and slowly and silently he let the lids of his eyes slide shut.

He felt the bed shift, and the warmth that was hovering over him was suddenly gone and he was suddenly chilled.

Naruto heard the distinctive sound of the rain picking up as he heard the window being thrown open, and he threw a hand over his face when his lids where no longer a strong defense for his tears.

The blonde sat up suddenly, staring towards the open window, "I'm so sorry, Sasuke…"

* * *

Author's Notes:  
ONE NICE REMINDER: NO NARUSAKU…just for those out there who want to flame my ass up because they might have forgotten the beginning of the fiction.  
- Yeah, this chapter was mean, but it gets better. No more cackling Nevi in the shadows... swear. Some things need to happen.  
- Yeah, I know… you hate me. Remember that whole thing of 'I have my reasons'? I figured I'd remind you.  
- And I _know_ Naruto isn't the type to watch something on _Vlad the Impaler_. That's the point. And if you don't know who Vald is, I do suggest you look that cruel bastard up.


	27. Chapter 27

Chapter 27 – Battle Between Black and White

Author's Notes: This was _the_ hardest chapter to write by far. Want to see me take a giant running leap out of my comfort zone? Despite what I had my muses help me with, I started writing on this chapter two months ago, but I'm in love with it.  
I did answer this before, but I'll answer again gladly. The fiction will be ending on chapter 29, with an extra wrap up with a just decided Epi.  
This (and the last remaining chapters) were the hardest to write, but in the end, they were my favorite by far.

Dedication: , for putting so much into your reviews and making writing worth every moment. My muses, for helping me through the last chapter and letting me keep my sanity. The reviewers, for not killing me, and still loving the last chapter despite everything. You all are wonderful.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything mention that is copyrighted in this fiction.

Chapter 27 - Battle Between Black and White

"A real man admits his fears. That's what I'm asking you to do here tonight. Who wants to go first?"  
_Movie: The Replacements  
_

Naruto didn't know what time he woke up the next day. He didn't remember Kakashi coming in and trying to wake him. He did however remember staying awake most of the night trying to call Sasuke. His phone was off, and of course, leaving a voice mail was completely and utterly pointless. When Naruto decided to climb out the window and go over to his house, his car wasn't even in the driveway, and the blonde couldn't even take a stab at where he could be.

He just didn't seem the social 'let's-spend-the-night' type.

He did remember staying up all night thinking. Comparing Sasuke and Sakura, comparing and contrasting the two.

One was broody, moody and anti-social; one was happy, loud, and overly social. One was dark and one was bright. One was quiet and one was loud. They were so different, and Naruto was…

"…Confused." The blonde groaned after explaining.

He sat on his front steps with Hinata and Kiba that night; the rain had died off and dried up for the most part, leaving puddles here and there and letting the wind blow in to swirl around them obnoxiously. He was just happy no one was getting at him for skipping school today.

Kiba sighed, "I mean, really? What is there to-"

Hinata let a sad face show, and cleared her throat, "Why are you confused Naruto?"

"I don't know what I'm feeling anymore…" Naruto let out a grumble in between his two best friends. His knees were bent uncomfortably and his head was cradled in his folded arms while he studied the ground in hopes to distract his wild mind.

"Naruto-kun…" Hinata began, "What color are Sakura's eyes?"

Kiba gave Hinata a questioning look over a blonde mop of hair that was blowing in the angry night wind, and she winked at him with a pleasant smile.

"I think green."

Hinata nodded as she stared off into the front yard, "What color are Sasuke's eyes?"

"Black."

Kiba pretended to snap his fingers before pointing a knowing finger to Hinata over Naruto's head, sparing her a smirk.

"What's Sakura's favorite color?" Kiba asked with an air of absentness to his voice.

Shoulders shrugged heavily, "Probably pink. Wears enough of it, doesn't she. Awful color."

Kiba gave his best friend an awkward look, rolling that statement around in his head. Had Naruto really taken a good look at Sakura's _hair_ before he proclaimed his '_love_' and sought her out? The same hair he thought was beautiful. Kiba looked over and eyed Naruto's hair color and sighed…probably not.

"What's Sasuke's favorite color?" Kiba rolled his eyes.

Naruto's hands rubbed at his face in a frustrating manner, rubbing over his scarred cheeks, "Blue. He really likes blue, but he said he likes red too. But he wears black all the time like he'd die if he didn't wear it, or someone else died. Emo bastard."

"What's Sakura's favorite movie?" Hinata asked cheerfully.

Naruto rolled his eyes in his hands that now cupped and hid his face, "Probably some stupid chick flick…"

"And Sasuke's?" Kiba snorted.

"_Donnie Darko_." Naruto moved his hands away and held up his face awkwardly, "He enjoyed the complexity of the film before the director's cut came out and he claimed it ruined it all. He was annoyed by little things in the movie and said how the character '_Frank_' was just supposedly brilliant."

"What's Sakura's favorite food?" Hinata smiled fondly.

Naruto titled his head from side to side. "Something nasty and overly complex and _expensive_. She mentioned it once, but I don't remember."

"What about Sasuke's?" Kiba studied his palm in a bored manner.

"He doesn't have a favorite…leave it to him, you know? He hates sweet things, but he'll try anything once because that's just how he is, like he's trying to prove his hard-ass manliness through taste testing or some shit. He prefers home cooked meals over take-out because that's usually all he eats. And the bastard is a fucking health nut, and he thinks ramen is a sin or some crap, because he looks at it like it's shit in a cup."

"What's Sakura's favorite book?" Hinata ginned.

"She doesn't look like the type to read. I'd guess she would read romance novels or other boring crap..."

Hinata giggled, "And Sasuke's?"

"He doesn't like to read often, he was a fan of _Fight Club_. He said anything by Chuck Pa…Pa-however the hell you pronounce his last name. He said he always puts a twist on an already different story line that he enjoys. He also really enjoyed the original '_I Am Legend_' before the movie changed it…"

"And what, Naruto," Kiba began with a sigh, "Has changed here and now."  
_  
Absolutely Nothing_.

Naruto seized up from where he was sitting, glancing up from the grass that had been neatly trimmed, his mind scrambling before he launched from the front steps.

Kiba sighed as Hinata scooted closer, "I say we hit him over the head next time. Wait, pretend I never said that, if there is a next time, let's leave the country."

The girl laughed lightly, "I was going to suggest we hand him over to Kakashi."

Kiba turned to the girl with a slightly shocked look at the sentence she said and realized that she indeed had been around him too much. The shock looked eased away at the gentle smile she was hiding behind the hand that was covering her mouth. He returned the smile kindly.

Each second was precious, each answer to all the questions they asked (and why) – he knew, and the moments they shared were cherished.

Their relationship…

He _loved_ it.

He only hoped Naruto got the same hint.

* * *

The blonde felt like he had a reason, yeah that's what he'd call it, a reason to pound on Sasuke's door at one in the morning. Naruto felt like he had a right to see him and speak to him.

But, Naruto was taught that there was a fine line between falling in love and being in love.

He wanted to know when that fine line was suddenly erased, and his eyes were opened in front of this stoic bastard glaring him to a frozen hell for just being in his mere presence.

"You…You have this awkward tint to your hair." Eyebrows furrowed at his own confusion of where his statement was leading him. Of all things to start out with.

Sasuke snorted, "Like fifteen shades of blonde are good for you."

"I hate every single grunt you've ever uttered to me simply because I _know_ what the hell they mean." Naruto grumbled.

"And your loud, obnoxious voice needs a damn mute button, because the whole _world_ knows what you mean."

"Your eyes are as deep as they go, and you know what the hell I mean because it was the only place you showed a fucking emotion at first."

"Everyone isn't as blunt as you." Sasuke growled.

"You scrunch your nose just barely if your annoyed, and you stare off if you're thinking about something."

"Like you and that stupid little tick you have of _snapping_? Or maybe when _you_ sit there flicking your fingers like it would bring the answer to you?" Sasuke snapped irrationally, getting annoyed.

"Learn to talk." Naruto barked, pointing a finger and snapping out a hand.

Sasuke practically snarled, crossing his arms calmly, "Learn to shut the fuck up."

"Dobe is an empty insult." The blonde grumbled, the hand dropping.

"Like teme means anything coming from your mouth." Onyx eyes began to disappear as the raven glared.

"You've got to be _really_ bored all the time to find so much shit to bitch about." Naruto flopped his arms down to his sides, his hands smacking his legs loudly.

Sasuke scoffed, "Have you heard that nails on the chalkboard noise that comes out of _your_ mouth?"

"You get uncomfortable and defensive more than I thought humanly possible, and shit Sasuke, I would swear your eyes were going to get glued in a glaring position if I didn't know any better."

Sasuke glared even harder, his hands flexing, peeling skin back over the knuckles tightly before attempting to relax. "Yeah, defensive is better than blabbing on and on about every little thing. And glaring, Naruto is the only thing that shuts you up."

Blue eyes studied the ground, and a tan hand rubbed absently at blonde locks of hair, "Your breath always smells like damn mints because you are obsessed with hygiene and you are one of the only people in the world who brushes your teeth after every meal."

Sasuke rolled his eyes, "Because I don't like to leave the aftermath for dessert like you. You always have something there after your seventeen meals a day…"

"Oh! Right! Mr. Healthy-for-no-reason! Really, we're in high school, live a little."

"I like my heart beating in a steady rhythm due to lack of fat clogs. Sorry I don't eat ramen every two hours and shovel down chocolate and soda."

"And why in the hell do you _always_ smell like apples? _Really_? Apples? Try something a little more manly-"

"Like your flowery shampoo?"

"And lighten up and watch a television show! Something, anything!"

Sasuke rolled his eyes, "Sports and fart-joke-laced comedy aren't 'something', Naruto."

"_And_ what the fuck are you? A woman? Your skin is too damn soft-"

"Is called lotion, jackass. Just because your skin is a little rougher doesn't mean shit." Sasuke growled.

"You should listen to more music and lighten your scowling ass up. Melt that icicle that's been shoved up your un-merry little ass. God knows you could use a good lightening up."

"Just because I don't listen to everything that's thrown at me doesn't mean…" Sasuke paused and let out a long sigh as if finally noticing the childishness in the act, "Naruto…what the hell is the point in all this."

The blonde's head stuttered as it shook in an unsure manner while his mouth struggled to work uncertainly, "You asked me…if I'm over Sakura."

Sasuke didn't even give a grunt as acknowledgment, and Naruto assumed it was because he didn't want to talk about the subject or he was wondering where he could punch the blonde first.

He spoke fairly quietly for remaining so fierce looking with the glare, "And…what's your point?"

Naruto took a deep breath, "I don't…notice her."

"I beg to fucking differ." Sasuke said in an acidic tone that made the other teen wince.

"I notice the way you scrunch your nose when you get annoyed, irritated or mad. I notice the difference between your smirk and you trying to hide an upcoming smile. I notice the way your head just barely tilts when something is worrying you."

Sasuke shook his head to stop the tilt that he never noticed was there till that second.

"I notice the way…I notice _everything_ with you. When it boils down to Sakura, I don't know or notice one thing about her. I don't notice anything accept how she compares to you, how she doesn't match up…"

"Stop."

Naruto looked up from where his gaze had eventually fallen to find onyx eyes looking towards him – unseeing.

"Go home, Naruto."

* * *

Sometimes, love has consequences that comes into our lives unforeseen.

Naruto never expected to be dismissed so simply. Sasuke never expected to hurt so badly.

Love, trust, feelings, hearts; they were delicate things that usually dangled on fine threads till it wore thin and fell and smashed.

It was always so hard to pick up the pieces, if you wanted, if you could, and then put them back together.

Two weeks passed.

Naruto kept going to school dressed as '_Naru-chan_'.

Some part of him didn't know why, another part of him just didn't want to let go of this life, like one day he'd wake up and Sasuke would walk into his house to pick him up.  
Explaining to Sakura and Ino that he and Sasuke were just giving each other some space was hard; saying that they were spending too much time together.

They didn't buy it.

Surprisingly though, they were sympathetic. They ended up being the girls Naruto enjoyed in the beginning. Doing any and everything to get his mind off of what was going on, and being his shoulder to lean on when it just didn't work. Ino started dating some guy from Academia, and didn't mention Sasuke after that.

After Sakura had her date with '_Kiba_', it seemed as though as she forgot Sasuke existed. Naruto knew she still had feelings, she always would, but he silently thanked her for stopping her crazed pursuit.

Naruto, as '_Kiba_', ignored Sakura like she was the plague. He ordered the real Kiba to not answer the door like his life depended on it, and even Hinata had to make up hasty excuses for the ducking.

Some part of Naruto dreaded that. The fact that he and Sakura really _had_ become friends with this persona of '_Naru-chan_', and the fact she really _was_ crushing on him as '_Kiba_'.  
Even though he knew where his true feelings were, he still didn't want to hurt her.

Kiba and Hinata didn't ask questions. They waited for Naruto. Kiba acted like nothing happened, and they just attempted to fall back into their old routine. Home from school, fight over homework, play some sport outside, and then lounge inside. Hinata was there to silently comfort.

Heartbreak was _never_ easy.

Naruto was still trying to find out how he had been swept up so quickly, and then, swept under the rug because of a foolish mistake.

Apparently, forgiveness wasn't a Uchiha trait.

Naruto understood he hurt someone he thought wasn't able to be hurt, who was indestructible, because he got the wrong meaning out of something stupid. Naruto understood that he himself was regretting a lot and wishing for very little, and wondering when on earth he had gotten so scared of simple feelings that now seemed to overwhelm him.

Yeah, the loud mouth kid who used to run around Konoha Public High about how strong and fearless he was would admit right here and now he was fucking petrified. He was scared of so many things involving one person.

Every night he pondered over how quickly everything happened with Sasuke. How it went from fighting to nothing to something. He silently wondered if the fighting was bullshit all along. If he was ever really angry. He knew he wasn't. He couldn't blame Sasuke for using him the way he did to get rid of the girls. When he fought with him and destroyed the living room, he purposely missed and didn't hit as hard. He was _grateful_ the bastard stayed with him and put up with his shit. Naruto wondered when everything got so complicated.

He never thought he'd fall in love. He thought love was complex and thought out or planned or something. He thought it was for adults with experience in something unknown to him. It came naturally and welcoming and easily before him, quickly and painlessly in _high school_ and left him in a whirlwind of confusion.

Love was flawed.

* * *

Sasuke didn't know why he made Naruto leave.

Maybe because Shikamaru was right – again – and he was scared. With each passing sentence in there own awkward little fight he knew what it all meant, but he wasn't willing to face it when Naruto wasn't willing to let go of someone else.

He knew these feelings weren't perfect, things happened and you're to overcome it, but to know some blonde idiot actually _hurt_ him without him realizing what he was causing, confused him.

The fact that made it more real that he could be hurt, more than _once_ in his life he could be really hurt by his feelings alone made him petrified. Naruto slipped, yeah, but who knew what else.

Going for someone who was going for someone else just _sounded_ like a suicide mission.

He knew he was falling for Naruto, but he wasn't quite sure if he was still in the air or on the ground.

Shikamaru made two more attempts to break into the Uchiha mansion before Sasuke firmly told him he was going to call the police if he didn't get off his property. It just showed how affected the young Uchiha really was. When Itachi harassed him, he took it. He ignored the tell tale signs Naruto pointed out, and deliberately missed brushing his teeth after dinner and held his nose half of the days and nights.

He really didn't know why he trusted Naruto. He really didn't ever trust anyone else, a real trust, all of it, everything. He didn't know why he entrusted Naruto to go on that date, and he wished he still didn't know why Naruto broke that trust.

He _didn't_ know why he picked Naruto instead of anyone else to chase the fangirls away. He was snappy, obnoxious, and loud. Everything Sasuke wasn't.  
Sasuke knew that was what was attractive, at first.

Now it was just every little thing about him.

Sasuke wanted to know when 'dobe' went from an insult to a nickname. When picking up Naruto went from being a chore to something to look forward too. He wondered when he started listening to him talk instead of tuning him out. He wondered when he started to smile instead of scowl.

He wondered why he couldn't give Naruto a fair chance to explain himself. He knew the reasons, all of them, but he just couldn't admit them out loud. Some would call that being a man and others would call it being a coward.

Sasuke flopped rather unlike himself around in the sheets of his bed in a feeble attempt to get comfortable and wondered absently when he had lay in bed and tried to sleep.

'_3:47 AM_'

Most likely some time ago.

He knew he didn't want to hear Naruto's explanation; because of a feeling that was now overwhelming him about the blonde, and he was scared the damn idiot was in love with someone else.

Love was complicated.

* * *

Naruto stared at his English teacher with a face scrunched in confused determination, red from embarrassment, and covered in make-up.

Sakura had run ahead to the next class to talk to the teacher about a project she was doing and some contest she was entering it in, but he simply ignored half of what she said.  
He noticed he did that a lot anymore.

The teacher stared at him, her eyebrows raised in waiting while her arms snaked across her breasts and an innocent stick wiggled in the air from the relentless chewing from her mouth.

"Anko-sensei, have you ever jumped out of a plane?"

The woman paused from chewing on her stick, "No, I can't say I have."

Naruto grinned lightly as he stared off at nothing, "My dad made me when I was twelve."

The light smirk that usually graced the woman's lips instantly fell while her eyes slightly bugged, "He…He did what?"

Naruto looked up from the floor he didn't realize he had taken to looking at, snapping out of his reminiscing moment, and chuckled, "Yeah, he's a little crazy."

"He made you-"

Naruto waved his hands, "No, he didn't _make_ me. I actually begged him. I wanted to go skydiving so bad after seeing the Power Rangers movie."

Naruto's mind flashed to Kakashi pushing him out of the plane and mentally groaned at the second most terrifying moment in his life.

Second compared to what was happening with Sasuke.

Anko gave him another odd look, but Naruto made a quick save, "Come on, Anko-sensei, you never wanted to be the Pink Ranger?"

Anko snorted, "Anyway."

"You asked me once…the class technically, what love was. I said you can't describe it. I was…wrong in some ways and right in so many others. Everyone has their own _personal_ definition, and certain things can't be described."

The woman stood from her seat, walking to the chalk board and grabbing the eraser to clean off the last lesson of the previous class, "Care to share?"

Naruto rubbed the back of his neck warily, "It's like, jumping out of that plane. I will never be able to put my finger on it. But, it would be like jumping without a shoot, and hoping my partner has one."

"Trust?"

Naruto shook the long wig, "No, more than that. Your partner obviously has to catch you, and then hopefully fall with you. The two of you are in your own little world, seeing everything from the inside out, and it's just the two of you. And then you go through this amazing, terrifying, but all around perfect feeling because you just did something for the _first_ time once you jumped. Something that was new and exciting."

"That sounds just like the start of things." She stated.

Naruto snorted, "Yeah, it is. Falling is the crazy part. At first you get that stomach jumping sensation just before it clenches every muscle. Your head spins in every direction from everything that's going on, because at first, you don't know how to comprehend it. Then, he comes along, wraps his arms around you, and everything is…perfect. You jump. You fall.

"The best part is when you're on the ground though. You have this rough landing that just adds to it, because it just makes you realize where you jumped from, and where you ended up. Then you can finally understand each other so clearly once you're on the ground, no yelling or signals, and figuring each other out over the rushing wind. And the best part is when you both look up at the sky _together _and realize what you just did. You get…giddy, and excited for more. Isn't that what love is?"

Anko turned around, one eyebrow raised.

"Just…Never ending? I know there are bumps, slips and trips along the way, but…maybe I'm just a bit disillusioned. Aren't you supposed to fall in love only once? My dad pushes that a lot. I mean, it's the biggest moment of your life, the most important thing in the world, and everything else is inconsequential. This is the _one_ person who knows everything about you, knows you better than you know yourself, who you opened yourself up to _completely_, and you give everything to. You'd go to hell and back and around the world for this person…jumping out of a plane _is_ the start of things. I don't even think all this explanatory bullshit covers it.

"I once heard someone say that love is giving someone the power to break your heart, but trusting them not too. I think that covers everything I said."

He wanted to say that, that phrase had ruined his entire existence.

He knew what it meant, knew what it held. It hurt.

But, he figured if he floated back to that wonderful land of denial he'd be fine until if he started blabbering this speech like his mouth had lost its way.

Naruto laughed lightly at his own ramblings while Anko stared on at the person who was wiser than they most likely knew.

"When it all boils down to it, you can't explain love. Whether it be an action, feeling, an emotion or all of the above. Trying to explain love is just so…_impossible_. As my English teacher you should understand that, with words, you can only explain – describe – so much. I mean… how do you explain a sunrise, to a man who has been blind since birth? You simply can't get every little detail so this person can experience every little part of it. It's just impossible… You simply can't explain something you have to experience for _yourself_. That's how love is…something _you_ have to experience for yourself."

Naruto sighed roughly, kicking at nothing on the ground, "And besides, I only want to fall once, because I sure as shit never want to jump out of a plane again."

Anko let out a loud laugh that rolled into a sweet giggle, "Was it worth it?"

"Jumping out of a plane?"

Naruto was debating whether or not he should tell her his dad had tricked him. Kakashi had lured him on his first plane with the common promises of Disney World, and when his father said they had to jump off and handed him his shoot, he wanted to die.

The blonde, in the end, was surprised Kakashi hadn't pulled a stunt like something out of Point Break. (1)

And besides, it was Kakashi who had begged Naruto to go skydiving, and Naruto declined, and Kakashi wouldn't stand for it.

The woman chuckled before smiling at her favorite student, "Finding yourself _in_ love? Was everything worth it?"

Naruto didn't even have to think it over, hesitate or stammer, "Worth more than anything else."

Denial was easier, but, the truth was unavoidable.

* * *

When Naruto got home from school, he did what he had been doing for two weeks and waved off Hinata and Kiba as they headed to the Inuzuka house and ignored the twisting stabbing feeling in his stomach.

Seeing other couples angered him while deepening his sadness.

When Naruto walked into his house and gratefully dropped his schoolbag full of his heavy work load to come, he didn't expect to have someone in the living room.

Kakashi usually lurked in his office until provoked like an animal.

But here Sasuke was, sitting on the couch, waiting to talk to Naruto.

* * *

Author's Notes:  
Firstly, the movies and books mentioned above are ones I enjoy _a lot_ and it's strictly an opinion. You don't have to go crazy if you loved the Director's Cut of Donnie Darko or _hate_ Chuck Palahniuk.  
1) Point Break was a movie made in the 90's. There was "stunt" (I say "" because it was fake) done when one guy jumped with a shoot, and then other didn't.

* * *


	28. Chapter 28

Chapter 28: All Eyes On You

Author's Notes: I want to thank you all for such positive feed back on the entire scene between Naruto and Anko concerning love. It was the most difficult scene to write in the fiction, and it had been the part I had been writing for two months. I just wanted to state though, for the people who have never experienced love before: please don't expect love to be like that. I did say in Naruto's speech (which was all my views) that its something you have to experience for yourself. Naruto didn't say it out loud, but he did imply that it was scariest moment of his life. Love is wonderful guys, but I want you all to realize it _isn't_ storybook. Now that I'm done mini-ranting, thank you all so much again. It meant a lot.

- I know this is a quick update, and no, I don't know if it's going to happen again. Enjoy, with love.

ALSO (**IMPORTANT**): The next chapter is going to be the longest yet (when you get the e-mail alert (if you have it on alert)) please don't freak out. If you didn't see the announcement on the website, you can now bookmark a page in case it's too long for you. And the next chapter, to give you an idea, is going to be almost as twice as long as this. It is going to be the last chapter and the there will be an Epi.

Warnings (it's been awhile): Man oh man is there OOC-ness… then again, there has been. Ah, AU at its best. Fluff-ness?

Dedication: Every one of you who reviewed. They all meant so much, it was very sweet, all of them. And again, my muses. Thank you.

Chapter 28: All Eyes On You

"I love you, not only for what you are, but for who I am when I'm with you."  
- Roy Craft

* * *

Naruto didn't have time to gape.

He was guessing it was because his brain didn't know how to process what was going on. He was _pissed_, that was for damn sure. He was considering _seriously_ hurting Sasuke, and breaking that bastard's face and destroying the living room for a good damn cause. He could get he was mad, and damn did he understand that Uchiha's could hold grudges, but it just hurt more when it involved him – them.

Naruto had made attempts to explain what happened, explain what he meant when he said that to Sakura, and right all his wrongs. Sasuke didn't let him. They both had been hurting because of something, because of a mistake and because they weren't together, and because of that damn Uchiha they were hurt even more.

And so, Naruto finally said the first snappish thing he could think of, "I should hit you over your fucking head in hopes your balls will drop you fucking _bitch_."

"Well, Na-Na, you're one to talk in that outfit…" Kakashi called as he made his way down the stairs.

Naruto turned to glare at his father, pointing an accusing finger and stomping a heel, "Do you _know_ what-!"

"Ah-ah!" Kakashi wagged his finger playfully in his son's face before tapping it on the end of his nose, "You should listen to my advice, son."

The blonde went rigid, and completely ignored the other teen in the room, "I always do, dad. You might have gone senile at a young age, but I _always_ listen to your advice. You can at least dish _that_ out without messing me up. Mentally."

"Then," The grayed man stated with a wave of his hand and a rocking of the feet, "remember that mistakes were made with both parties. No matter what they were, you are both here now to _talk_ them out, and that, I suggest you try and do. Because if not," his eyes flicked and met Sasuke's for a moment, "you will regret it. So… think about that before snappish remarks and irrationality. Talk."

Naruto watched as his father walked past him, calmly grabbing his keys and spinning them absently on his index finger as he walked out the front door.  
The blonde flinched as the front door slammed closed, and silence washed over them eerily.

The blonde turned and walked calmly as he could down the hall, walking into his door when he didn't turn the door handle all the way, and stumbled into his room when the door was flung open.

Naruto changed slowly and thought through things carefully. He was mad – check. He could understand why Sasuke didn't want to talk to him – check. He could understand why Sasuke needed _some_ time – okay. He was upset Sasuke dismissed him when he tried to explain himself – check. But when it boiled down to it, after all this, he knew they need to ta-…

Damn Kakashi.

The blonde wiped the make-up carefully from his face and thought about the young Uchiha in his living room. If he was angry about Naruto still cross-dressing, he didn't show it, either that or he just simply understood it. And, well, Uchiha's are supposed to know and understand everything, so if not there is just a grunt and an impassive face.

Naruto took a deep, not-so-calming breath in and let it out shakily before walking back out into the hallway. He ran his tan fingers down the orange shirt and then adjusted the blue jeans before coming to a halt in the mouth of the room.

Sasuke looked over from what he was looking at, studying something or the other and locking dark onyx eyes with pools of summer-sky blue.

Naruto felt his heart rate double from just a simple look, his breath barely hitched, and his stomach knotted.

The raven scooted down slightly on the couch, hinting for Naruto to join him on the couch, but the blonde remained where he stood.

"Will you sit down?" Sasuke asked lightly, their eyes still locked.

Like some spell put on him, Naruto slowly stepped towards the couch slowly with careful and calculated steps before unceremoniously flopping on his spot next to Sasuke.

The blonde studied his tan fingers as they tangled together on his lap, trying to ignore the awkward air that fell over them and fight away the terrible feeling in his stomach that made him feel as though he was falling over and over again.

Sasuke studied the ceiling, his pale silk arms were crossed over his chest while he absently tried to will away the anxiety and awkward air.

"When you _really_ laugh, your eyes close," Sasuke mumbled.

Naruto's fingers gripped themselves when the raven next to him began to speak, and patiently waited for him to continue or acknowledge him.

"Your hair…is unnaturally soft." The raven grumbled.

Naruto held back a snort at his attempt at a complement, and knew that he was uncomfortable, "Sasuke…"

"Your smile," He continued, looking over at the blonde who was looking at him, "your _real_ smile, Naruto, is breath taking."

The blonde's mouth snapped shut with such force you could hear his teeth smack together.

"Your balance exists in some alternate universe, because the day where you don't trip or fall is the day hell freezes over." Sasuke continued.

The blonde let out a breathy, nervous chuckle, his breath coming to tickle the flawless pale face next to him that he was facing.

"I swear if I see you go a day without ramen dobe, I know the world is ending."

Another chuckle escaped Naruto's lips, and the nervousness was leaving with each sentence Sasuke uttered.

The blonde went rigid when he felt a hand cup his cheek, his eyes finally locking with dark pools, and a thumb grazed at his cheek tenderly before he realized that Sasuke's soft hand was the one that was doing it and he instantly relaxed into the touch.

"Your scars, damn Naruto your scars…" The blonde's eyes flashed with hurt as a thumb grazed over three scars, "are so _beautiful_."

Naruto's brow furrowed as his heart pounded at the whispered, soft, sincere words that came from the teen that he swore didn't know how to compliment, and here he was…

"_You_ scrunch your nose when you try not to cry."

Blue eyes blinked at notice when his nose was scrunched, and clenched his jaw and willed away the prickling at the back of his eyes and the emotions that threatened to become too much.

"I hate how you make me…different. You drag things out of me. Words, smiles, even a thing called laughter which didn't even exist in my life till you came around."

The blonde blushed lightly under the touch, and his eyes searched the flawless face of Sasuke.

His Sasuke.

"I _hate_ when you dress in drag, because you cover up and change something that looks perfect to begin with."

Naruto's blush deepened, and the blond muttered insults and things under his breath to try and will away the embarrassment.

"You're laughter rings, your eyes shine, and damn dobe does your voice make me smile."

Naruto looked away, clamping down on the inside of his cheek unconsciously and tried to pull away from the touch for some reason or another.

"And you do that." Sasuke stated lightly, making the blonde turn to look at him.

"You chew on the inside of your cheek when you're uncomfortable because you don't think anyone will notice," Naruto bit down on his tongue to move from his cheek, "and you look at everything you can to try and distract yourself."

Aquamarine eyes snapped to attention when the young Uchiha stood from the couch and blindly reached out his hand for the blonde to accept or ignore.

Naruto stared at the pale hand that he had held too many times to count, and more times than not, it was simply out of habit than anything else. He wasn't sure when it turned to comfort, and neither was Sasuke.

"You can actually blush. Who knew assholes had blood instead of ice?"

Sasuke's glare was empty when he threw it, and dropped completely when the blonde grabbed his hand and waited for the tug to pull him up.  
The pull lifted the blonde completely in the air for a split second, and had the two of them bumping chests and grabbing hold to each other to keep balance.

Naruto didn't know why he felt the need to say it here and now.

"I won't forget her, because she made me see you."

A delicate brow raised slightly before quickly falling, and Naruto felt the hands that held his waist and upper arm try to recede till he gripped onto the front of Sasuke's shirt that he was holding onto.

"Not like that, and you know it. If I didn't try to get to her, I …."

"…can be such a blonde."

Naruto wasn't sure when he had closed his eyes, but he was guessing right around the time when he was in the middle of trying to make sense of the entire situation and get his head on straight.

Right around when he realized he was trying to confess…

Blue eyes came into view at the snapping open motion of his eyelids when Sasuke rested his forehead against his, and his nose brushed his, and his lips ghosted his own.

…Sasuke did it for him.

"I love you."

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Naruto liked the _idea_ of Sakura, but was _in love_ with the thought, the feeling, of being with Sasuke.

Naruto finally managed to stutter back an _'I love you'_ after a moment of exploding thoughts, relief and fighting back tears that he wasn't sure why tried to fight their way forward. They shared a kiss. Nothing hot or steamy or awkward. A light, building, pressing kiss; one that felt like they were trying to merge together. Sasuke's hand had moved from Naruto's shoulder into his hair, and pulled him forward by the waist before cupping his face. Naruto's arms were thrown around Sasuke's neck, holding him close, pulling him in hopes the moment would never end.

For the moment, their hearts pounded together, their lips refused to part, and nothing else in the world mattered.

Love was, at that _moment_, perfect.

It was a moment they were sure to never forget.

Their foreheads rested together when they finally pulled apart, their breaths mingled in the intimacy of the moment as their eyes locked in a stare. Not intense, not heated, not lust filled, not awkward; a stare full of an emotion that wasn't held back anymore.  
_  
Love_.

Then they pulled back, and Naruto smiled one of his breath taking, room engulfing smiles and Sasuke smirked with a shake of his head, and they continued on.

Moments were moments, and they knew, it wasn't going to be like that always and forever. They knew they weren't always going to get along, they knew they were going to fight, and they knew that they were only human.

They accepted the moment, they locked it away in their memory, and they went on.

Naruto's stomach grumbled loudly, and the blonde laughed when Sasuke shook his head and grabbed his hand and dragged him to the kitchen.  
The blonde sat on the stool while Sasuke made him ramen, and they caught each other up on the past two weeks.

Apologies would be said later, when the time was right, because right now wasn't the right moment.

It was like it always was; Naruto laughing and making a mess and Sasuke poking fun at him.

Kiba and Hinata made there way back over only because they wanted to see Naruto, and Hinata was in an overload of giggles when she saw the two together. Kiba, still on the defense, glared himself into a fit.

Kakashi came home at the end of the night, walking through the front door intent on making his son build him a new living room if something was just a hair out of place.

He found Naruto curled up on the couch, his eyes closed peacefully and obviously asleep. Sasuke's pale hand was stilled in blonde locks, his head resting peacefully against the back of the couch, and his eyes closed while his chest rose and fell in his slumber.

Kakashi plucked Sasuke's phone from the couch cushion as he finished covering the boys up, and scrolled through the contacts till he found the man Naruto had talked about before.

The grayed man pressed the phone to his ear, smiling when the dead tone identical to Sasuke's met his ear.

"And you must be Itachi!" The man chirped.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Sasuke woke to the feeling of a crick in his neck, and quickly adjusting, he tried to dive back into the comfort of glorious sleep.

That is, right before Naruto's curse startled him to the point of dragging him back out, "Shit!"

Onyx eyes snapped open just to focus on Naruto rolling off the couch and wrestling with a blanket that he had become entangled in throughout the night in his sleep.

"Dobe?"

"We fell asleep, teme! School jackass, school!" Nauto barked as he kicked the blanket off and hopped up.

Sasuke smirked at the rumpled clothes and wild hair that usually seemed as crazed as it could get, "Hey, idiot, did you look at the clock?"

"I…W-what?…Well, no." Naruto's shoulders dropped slightly before he turned to eye the large clock on the wall and rubbed the back of his head in a tired manner.

'_5:47 AM'_

"Oh…" Naruto chuckled.

Sasuke eyed the tabled near the front door with a glare, "Naruto…?"

Said blonde took a step back at the dangerous tone in the teen's voice, "Y-yes?"

"Why is my phone charging next to yours and _how_ did it get to charging without a charger? And damn it all dobe, how in the fuck did my uniform get here?"

The two snapped their heads towards the kitchen when Kakashi's laughter rung out like gunshots, danger clearly ringing through the air and the two simply threw caution into the wind as they simultaneously walked slowly towards the sound.

The two ended up walking into their worst nightmare and froze.

"Oh hell." Sasuke deadpanned upon seeing the scene in front of him.

Most would have expected a murder, or perhaps, a kitchen destroyed from a battle of epic proportions. Except, seeing one grown grayed man who took great pleasure in mentally torturing his son and best friend and one older brother whose favorite past time was tormenting his little brother by any means possible; seeing them together in one room could only mean one thing.

"Death is coming, huh teme? I thought cats can sense it, but I think this is a special case." Naruto whispered, eyeing his father suspiciously while he put down his cup of steaming hot whatever it was on the counter.

"Have you made a will, dobe?"

"Left that off of my 'to-do' list." Naruto muttered as he watched Itachi put down his own mug of something.

"Naruto-kun," Itachi began, flicking his low ponytail over his shoulder, "so good to see you again."

"It's so good to see you two finally woke up." Kakashi chimed.

The two teens shared a look, one of worry, and one glare.

"What are you two doing?" Sasuke growled, turning back to the two men.

"Oh!" Kakashi immediately began, "I was just telling Itachi about my Iru-chan."

Naruto groaned and Sasuke spared a raised eyebrow to show his confusion, "His boyfriend. My ex-principle."

"It seems as though you two solved all your problems." Itachi droned on, running a perfect index finger around the rim of his mug, "Here I thought the sex just wasn't good."

"More like lacking, Itachi-kun." Kakashi smiled on sweetly.

Naruto's face quickly morphed from a look of worry, to mortification, "Geez, dad! Ever heard of a thing called shame?"

Sasuke smirked a little at the flame of a blush that covered a once tan face before Itachi chimed in or really, continued to drone on.

"I was sure they had done something."

The younger Uchiha turned to glare at his older brother, who simply did nothing having seen the look and had thrown it too many times to be affected.

The blonde yelped when his father smiled to the point his eyes had closed, "Dad! Shut up! Just shut the hell up for the sake of whatever is left of my sanity."

The two grown men faced each other; Itachi raising a perfect eyebrow out of place on his perfect face while Kakashi continued to smile on brightly while his eyes were still closed.

The dark haired man turned back to the teens lingering in the doorway, "So I was right, you _have_ done something. Hn. I knew you were more of an ass these past couple of weeks, little brother, simply because of the lack of a little blonde play toy."

Naruto didn't even bother to try and stop Sasuke as he lunged for his brother, only because he himself lunged for his father when Kakashi voiced his agreement.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Naruto walked hand in hand with Sasuke towards the school, still thanking Hinata for doing his make-up while Kakashi continued talking to Itachi. It seemed they had taken great pleasure in talking about the most embarrassing things they could think of that consisted of Naruto or Sasuke at the top of their lungs while the subjects of the matter readied themselves for school.

Or, really, silently plotted two murders.

The blonde swung their hands flamboyantly between them and flashed a smile when Sasuke turned to throw him a glare at too much movement at such an early hour.

"Say, teme?"

"Hn."

"No, it doesn't involve Itachi." Naruto said, decoding, and not catching the completely confused and almost impressed look Kiba gave him over his shoulder.

"Hn."

"Oh, well, can I meet you at my house after school. I need to stay after." Naruto continued on in his usual cheery morning voice.

"Why? What's wrong?" Sasuke inquired, sparing a few words.

"Nothing."

"Hn."

The blonde stuck his tongue out playfully, too joyful to hide his childish antics, "I'm not lying!"

"Alright!" Kiba exclaimed, stopping the four in the middle of the sidewalk and turning, "I have to know how the hell you know what he's saying."

Naruto tapped his own nose, "I can decode bastard. I've been training for this moment my entire life living with Kakashi."

Kiba snorted, pointing a finger, "Okay, too true."

The four began walking again, Naruto and Kiba chuckling at the thought of what passed as it flitted through their mind before Sasuke enquired on what the blonde had spoken on.

"Why do you have to stay after dobe, and don't lie. You blink too much when you lie." Sasuke stated matter-of-factly.

"Ever think I had fucking mascara in my eye, teme?"

"Hn. Defensive." Sasuke mumbled as he let Naruto drag him along towards the school.

The blonde sighed roughly and stomped his foot, the two of them stopping before Naruto told Kiba and Hinata to continue on who had also stopped.

Blue eyes turned to meet jet black, and Naruto knew what he fell asleep deciding was worth it. What plagued his sleep didn't matter. Nothing else in the world mattered save for this person in front of him right now, and he would be damned if he risked it again.

"I'm going to talk to Tsunade after school."

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

"So," Sakura began as nonchalant as she could pull off as they took their seats in English.

"So!" Naruto clapped his hands together playfully with an air of happiness he couldn't shake.

Uttering three words had changed him, and it was beginning to annoy everyone – his overly bright mood that is.

"You and Sasuke-kun are doing well again." Sakura propped her head up on her hand and began tracing patterns on the desk she sat at.

A tan face was alight with a smile that drew Sakura's attention away from her invisible doodles, "Yes, we are."

"Everything settled for good this time?"

A tan index finger began making his own invisible doodles on the desk top as he smiled faintly, "Almost. But I'm working on it. We're working on it together."

The girl smiled faintly, and began nudging him in the ribs, "You act like you love him Naru-chan."

Sakura listened to the hum of wonderment that came from the thought-to-be girl next to her and green eyes widened, "I have you to thank for opening my eyes to that, by the way."

The girl thought back only to when she drilled into her about what Naru-chan had meant when the class had been discussing the meaning of love, and Naru-chan had denied the feeling. Sakura, on the other hand, denied her denial.

She had no idea that Naruto was talking about him coming to this school to pursue her, and then finding Sasuke, and in the end falling in love.

"Oh, by the way, Sakura-chan," Naruto said straightening up in his seat as Anko walked in the room, sparing him a wink as she hopped up on her desk.

"Yeah, Naru-chan?"

"Kiba told me he was stopping by sometime today after school. He wanted me to tell you. He said he was thinking about having a big hang out day. So, please bring Ino along."

The girl's mood instantly sky rocketed, "He's coming over?"

"Yeah."

"You're coming too, right?" Her voice chirped at the thought of seeing this boy again, but Naruto had different intentions she had no idea about.

"Yeah, we'll both be there."

* * *

"Alright Uchiha," Shikamaru muttered, "why in the hell are you being a troublesome thorn in my side today?"

Sasuke turned around to glare at his best friend with all his might, silently hoping that he would burst into flames, "Hn."

"I will not let this go."

And something he must have picked up from Naruto, Sasuke threw up his hands in the air and smacked a hand on his face to drag it along to wipe away the disgruntled face.

When the hell did everyone begin to understand '_hn_'?

"I've known you for a long damn time, I know what the damnable grunt means. Troublesome." Shikamaru said as if reading his mind. "And Naruto loves you, so it's easier."

Sasuke grumbled under his breath, turning to glare out the window as they waited for Neji to enter the classroom to begin lessons. Shikamaru followed his lead, his eyes scanning the clouds and settling his features peacefully.

"He's going to talk to Tsunade after school." Sasuke mumbled.

Sasuke's head rested in his hand as he stared out the window solemnly, waiting for Shikamaru's comments to follow about the clouds knowing the teen was easily distracted by them.

"So, Naruto's going to go to the principle? Hm. Looks like he really does love you after all, Uchiha, in case you had any doubt left I just hope you're prepared for the backlash after he tells the principle."

Sasuke snorted, "Troublesome."

Shikamaru chuckled, "Hn."

The raven sighed, "You are to stand by someone you care for, Nara. No matter how tough the times get. You can't get scared. Some lazy asshole drilled that into my head. So, even if that means your certain someone comes out to a prestigious school that he has been cross-dressing for whatever reason, you stick by them."

"Ah, young troublesome love." Shikamaru sighed.

* * *

Naruto walked into the Dean's office at the end of the school day, his mind playing through scenarios while his heart beat rapidly in his chest. The blonde faced the Assistant Dean as she sat at her desk, her head bowed as she was immersed in her paper work. Her fingers would come up occasionally and tuck a lock of dark hair behind her ear without breaking her concentration, scribbling on until the hair would fall in her face once more. Blue eyes flicked to the opened doorway to the left, glancing at the title above the door in bold letters that clearly read '_Dean_' before clearing his throat.

The Assistant Dean looked up, a smile gracing her features and wiping away the concentration, "Hello Naru-chan. I hope you're staying out of trouble."

Naruto smiled back, reaching a tan hand up and rubbing the back of his blond wig and careful not to mess up the pig-tails. "Yes, Shizune-san. No more pranks."

The woman smiled gently, "Then what can I do for you dear?"

"I was wondering," Naruto cleared his voice as it began cracking oddly from his nervousness, "if I could have a word with the old hag?"

Shizune gave him a stern look, "I'll go see if she has a moment."

Naruto nodded, his pigtails swinging wildly, and his sky blue eyes followed the woman as she stood from her desk and made her way to the opened doorway.

She knocked politely on the doorframe, lightly and quietly before looking over and flashing a quick smile before knocking again only loud and obnoxiously.

Naruto distinctly heard a snore erupt before something fell, and heard the dean begin yelling, "I'LL HAVE THE DAMN REPORTS IN FIFTEEN – oh. Shizune. What is it that you need?"

The woman nodded her head, and pointed to her face to signal her friend and boss to wipe the drool from her face, "A student would like to speak to you."

The blonde nodded, adjusting the undershirt to her blazer properly so it would cover her large breasts properly and patted down her low tied blonde pig-tails before slapping on the stern face of the Dean, "Send her in."

Shizune ushered the girl forward and waved him into the office before closing the door behind him, leaving Naruto and Tsunade to themselves.

"Hey granny." Naruto let out in his girlish voice.

"Look brat," Tsunade growled, "I'm in no mood."

Naruto waved his hands in front of himself in a defensive manner, the light sparkling off of the clear nail polish that littered his nails, "I know, I'm not either, I apologize Tsunade-sama."

The older woman stiffened, and her face creased with worry, "Alright kid, what's wrong?"

"Before I tell you, I need your word that I am the only one that suffers the consequences for the actions that I – _myself_ – took, no matter how many people that I involved."

The woman paused very briefly before nodding, "Uzumaki, what the hell is going on?"

She never saw this thought-to-be girl before without a bright smile on her face.

"I'm sorry, Tsunade."

-0-0-

Kakashi sneezed harshly in the living room, Itachi turning towards him and passing along a tissue, the older man taking it with a nod of thanks.

The grayed man wiped his nose and turned to the dark haired man, blinking owlishly, "Have you ever sensed that someone is tattling on you? You know, something you deserved?"

Itachi sneezed suddenly, just holding onto his cup, before looking slowly over at Kakashi with one eyebrow raised.

"Hn."

-0-0-

Tsunade trained her eyes on the person in front of her after the apology was spilled, wondering why on earth she apologized, and why on earth her voice sounded so deep.

"Naru-"

A tan hand was raised to silence her, hoping silently he could still manage to hang on to the courage to get through this confession. Naruto let his eyelids flutter shut and pictured Sasuke, a rare moment when he smiled instead of smirked, before opening his eyes. Using the hand that was held up to silence the principle, he reach up and grabbed at the wig that was fastened to his head half-hazardly this morning since Kakashi hadn't helped at all.

Tan digits sunk into the fake hair and gripped at the hair, and then slowly with deep calming breaths, he pulled the wig away. Naruto held the wig limply by his side, and held his eyes tightly closed while he waited, and waited, and waited for what seemed like an eternity.

"Naru-chan, we all know about the cancer."

The blonde seized up for a moment, damning Ino to years of bad hair, weight gain, and blotchy skin.

"Ma'am." Naruto cleared his voice, sounding like he did when he would come home from school, "I'm _Naruto_, please don't call me Naru-chan anymore."

Honey eyes blinked, and then blinked again at the voice that admitted from the person in front of her. Sure, she knew her…his, whatever's name was Naruto, but…this was different.

"My name is Naruto Uzumaki. I'm an ex-student from Konoha Public High School. _Male_ student. In a desperate attempt to get close to the girl of what I assumed was my dreams, I dressed as one of your students. I _do not_ have cancer."

Tsunade shook herself out of her stupor, "Excuse me? Who got you in?"

"My father, Kakashi, who will _not_ get in trouble for this."

"Did any other adults know about this?"

The blonde thought on it, and wondered if he should absently get him in trouble for this morning's antics, "Itachi Uchiha. He will…also _not_ get in trouble for this."

"And your old principle doesn't know about this at all?" She growled.

Naruto shook his matted down head, "No," he sighed, "He was upset about the whole ordeal."

Tsunade straightened in her chair, "Why's that, brat. Surely one prank at my school meant fifty more at your old one."

"He and my father were – are – dating. My father told him we were moving to Suna and they had to go long distance. Talking on the phone opposed to seeing each other made him pretty upset. So Iruka doesn't need to get in trouble for this either since he didn't know about it."

"And, _who_ brat, will be getting in trouble for this?"

Shoulders shrugged innocently, "I will. Whatever you see fit."

"And what pray tell, do you plan on doing now that I know your dirty little secret?" Tsunade asked in a dangerous tone.

Another shrug of the shoulders. "Make things right. That's why I'm here, because I needed to start with you."

The woman sighed, and then, she made her decision.

* * *

Sasuke stood outside of the large gate of Madame Francis's School along with Shikamaru and Temari. The lazy teen had silently explained the entire ordeal in less than two sentences, a shrug, and a mumble to his girlfriend while they waited. Kiba and Hinata stood right behind Sasuke, and occasionally, the small girl would touch his shoulder to show her comfort and support. To let him know they were all in this together.

Sasuke was too worried to even bother to tell her to knock it the hell off, not to mention he didn't want Naruto outrageously mad at him. Or Neji for that matter.  
Onyx eyes impatiently scanned the front doors of the school while his heart pounded an unhealthy rhythm in his chest, while he mentally damned himself.

He felt like he should have just told Naruto to wait it out. To think of something else. _They_ would think of something else together. Now he was worried something would happen to the point Naruto would be upset. He was waiting for the blonde to come out of the school; black lines of eyeliner and mascara running down his lightly powdered face, his forehead creased and his nosed scrunched. The raven's chest ached just thinking about those beautiful eyes filled with tears and his hands hastily wiping them away and causing his face to blotch. Then, the worst part of all, would be his smile not being there, being washed away in his tears.

He was just worried about…

"Naruto…" Sasuke breathed out as the blonde exited the school.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

The blonde walked hand in hand with Sasuke, the two walking silently with the troop of teens, chatting lightly, following behind as they continued on towards Sakura's house. He listened as Hinata barely let out directions and Kiba repeated them ten times louder as they continued. Before they left the school, Naruto politely asked Hinata to help him put his wig back on for the last time.

Naruto smiled as the raven squeezed his hand gently, and the blonde turned his head and looked over the see Sasuke looking at him. Really _looking_ at him. It wasn't a stare or a glance or gaze or a glare. It wasn't creepy, heated, or passionate. It was a simple stare to show the raven truly saw him, and showed the love they admitted in his eyes. It was a look like one was given yesterday, and it made his heart flutter.

Naruto knew no one could see it through what always seemed like an impassive look to everyone else, but he saw the differences.  
A tan hand squeezed back in response, a light smile lighting a tan face before Sasuke leaned over as they continued to walk and placed a kiss on his forehead.

"Get a room, Uchiha!" Kiba barked with a laugh.

The blonde tripped over his feet from prolonged exposure away from, but Sasuke tugged on his hand and silently helped him regain his balance.  
The group turned down a pathway through a sweet manicured lawn to a large mansion, and then the group grew silent. Naruto silently counting each step and watching each crack and each blade of grass go by as he walked to the front door of Sakura's mansion, and feeling as though he was a dead man walking.

They group stopped in front of the door, and a tan hand squeezed a pale one gently before sparing a glance and raising his free one, Naruto knocked.  
The front door swung opened, and Sakura and Ino stood in the doorway expectantly, their eyes bright and their clothes changed into beautiful outfits.

Sakura and Ino both looked over the group and the pink haired girl's face fell slightly as she addressed Naruto, "Naru-chan, I thought you said Kiba-kun would be here?"

All eyes turned to Naruto.

* * *

Author's Notes: I know I left _everything_ opened and I know I left _everything_ dangling off a horribly shitty cliff with nasty jagged rocks at the bottom. I know. I'm mean and nasty. But you _love_ it.  
-0-0- I'm sorry (that's a lie) if you weren't happy with the love confession. People tend to over due them (-raises hand-) and having experience with falling/being in love and confessing feelings, it's a moment, quick and short and then you go on with your life. I didn't want to over dramatize it.  
-0-0- The confessing (about cross dressing). Yeah, still working on it, and I'm going to tell you right now, if you don't like the outcome/aftermath of his coming out party, then…I laugh at choo.  
Now that I'm done ranting… I love you all. Read, review, and enjoy.


	29. Chapter 29

Chapter 29: To Say Goodbye for a New Hello

Author's Notes (**IMPORTANT**):  
-One: These author's notes are a little long, but all this stuff you kinda need to read is here. If you'd rather read the fiction then come back, please do so.  
-I'm posting this now simply for the fact I don't know when I'll be able to have the time to post it again with my mother being back in the hospital. That means the Epi is going to be most likely coming at some random hour in the night.  
-Two: There will be an Epilogue after this, and I promise…it's so much shorter.  
-Three: I want to ask two simple things of all my readers before I get on to the normal things. One: Don't review simply about the lemon, please. Two: Don't rip Sakura a new asshole in your review, please. And one last favor because hell, I already asked for two. Don't _tell me_ how it should have ended if you didn't like how it turned out. That's all I'm asking for. If you don't like it, go ahead and tell me _why_, but…those are my asking-s.  
NOW.  
Thank you all for the latest reviews, they were wonderful (as usual). Especially the ones who talked about Kakashi and Itachi – those made me laugh.  
And here you are…enjoy.

Dedication: Everyone who stuck with the fiction, who reviewed, and who enjoyed each and every moment as much as I enjoyed writing it. Thank you.  
And a particular shout out to my muses for helping me through this screaming headache of a fiction and of a lemon.

Disclaimer: Well, as with everything else, I don't own anything copyrighted in this fiction… because I'm not that special.

Warning: So, I'm still trying to break out of my lemony shell, but, I still… I don't know… hold back? I stepped out of my comfort zone as much as I could…so, I hope you like the lemon as much as I was satisfied with it (as many times as I rewrote it).  
_Lemon, Foul Language, and some fluff. And, of course, the longest chapter yet._

Don't know where this road  
Is going to lead  
All I know is where we've been  
And what weve been through." – Boyz II Men

Chapter 29: To Say Goodbye for a New Hello

* * *

Naruto sucked in a breath, trying to ignore the pounding noise of his heart that thrummed in his ears to listen to the woman in front of him. He needed to hear what she said. He needed to be able to counter argue everything she said. He needed to be able to defend his crazy plot and everyone he dragged in with him.

"… incredibly stupid."

Naruto shook his blonde head, shaking some blonde locks free from their matted down posture, "I'm sorry?"

Tsunade huffed in annoyance, "This stunt was incredibly stupid brat."

He nodded slowly, "I know."

"Alright," She sighed, "just how many of your friends did you get involved?"

"A few." Naruto mumbled under his breath.

"So," She continued, "In an incredibly _selfish_ stunt, you risked your _friends_ and _family_?"

A tan hand came up to run through blonde locks, freeing bobby-pins to let them clatter to the floor, "Yes."

"_So_." She drawled, "What suddenly made you have a change of heart?"

The blonde looked up, his eyes locking with the Dean's, "I think you should sit down and have a talk with Anko. She has a pretty good idea save for the ultra fine details."

Her brow wrinkled in confusion, "And what in the hell does that mean?"

Naruto chuckled as he swooped down to begin picking up the mess, "I came here carelessly and selfishly, not thinking of anyone else but myself. Man is that unlike me too, old hag, you have no idea. I came here to pursue a young woman by the name of Sakura Haruno, who at the time, I thought was my future wife or something. Along the way, I met someone who gave me a change of heart, and made me realize how reckless I was being. How rude, selfish, and careless. He opened my eyes…"

"He?" Tsunade inquired.

"Yes."

The woman took a deep breath, "So I'm supposed to find a proper punishment for a young man who came into _my_ school cross-dressing trying to get to one of _my_ students and fell in love with someone who doesn't go to _my_ school?"

Naruto stood with his wig in one hand and the pins in the other, a firm nod and a stern look, "Yes."

"I do believe, brat, you are one interesting kid." She chuckled.

"Huh?" Naruto almost dropped the things in his hands.

"The punishment is simple, Uzumaki. Aside transferring _out_ of my school, you are to _announce_ why you are transferring. Tell them. I don't care how, but simply keep it appropriate. Don't step one foot on the property again after that, you hear? I'll keep every one of your friends and family and whoever else was involved out of this if you keep your end of the bargain."

The blonde swallowed thickly, "Can't they sue me? The students?"

She smiled sweetly, a scary sweet smile that had bumps rising along tan skin, "I'll handle it."

"Then I'll announce it."

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

"So," Sasuke finally got to speak after Naruto spewed out his conversation between he and Tsunade, "you have to announce _everything_ to the entire student body?"

"Ouch!" Naruto flinched away from Hinata, whose hands were frozen in the air, where his head used to be.

Her porcelain face tinted with red as she took step towards him, and began pinning the wig back into place, "S-sorry, Naruto-kun."

"Well, what in the hell do you plan to do?" Kiba rested his hands on Hinata's shoulders, and instantly, her hands that were shaking calmed.

"_OH!_" Naruto smacked his forehead with his palm, dirtying his palm with powder, "You all are worried with what will happen to _you_!"

Hinata snapped her hands back as if she had been burned, "N-no!"

A tan hand waved her off, "Pa-_lease_. I already figured this out."

"Oh really, oh great blondie. Wise idiot of idiots. How on earth have you figured it out?" Kiba said, trailing off from his mystified voice.

"Well, firstly Kiba, the fact that you helped smuggle your best friend into an all girl's school…hero. The fact that you got a beautiful girlfriend out of it…legend."

Hinata giggled, and Naruto pointed at her nonchalantly, "As far as you're concerned, you had no idea, play it up a little with being mad here at Kiba. But, you were as in the dark as Ino and Sakura. I have faith you can pull it off."

The blonde spun and faced Shikamaru and Temari, "And hell, I didn't even know you two knew as much as you did, so let's go back to pretending we don't know anything about each other. Deal?" Naruto winked.

"What about Sasuke?" Shikamaru asked simply.

Naruto turned to face the raven who still stood close, and looked him in the eye, "Well, that's up to the bastard. But, seeing as how the announcement has been made, you should all make your decisions and stick to them."

Pale fingers entwined themselves with tan digits, or what used to be tan.

"What do you mean you announced it, school is out?" Sasuke dared to ask, while everyone looked at each other questionably.

Naruto held up their tangled fingers; pale fingers clashed with tan tinted with black. Sasuke looked to Naruto, who was wiggling his eyebrows, laughing lightly and tugging on his hand.  
"Alright, teme. We need to get the hell out of here. The Dean should be reaching the announcement any minute now."

-0-0-

Tsunade stood there, tapping one foot in a annoyed rhythm, her arms crossed in front of her large chest while her head shook back and forth. Her honey eyes reflected the large black letters that littered the walls as soon as you entered the school, fresh through the doors.

She sighed, trying not to yell, but realizing she had gotten exactly what she asked for. She smirked as she turned away, Shizune walking in her shadow as their heels clicked down the empty hallway. Anko leaned against the front door with a large smile and a shake of her head before she disappeared out of them.

The Dean decided to leave it there as the official announcement.

There, in large, black letters sprayed sloppily in paint:  
_  
Naruto Uzumaki aka Naru-chan is actually a BOY (yes, male).  
Sincerely Naruto, Ex- Madame Hell-Hole student.  
_

* * *

"Really?" Kakashi hummed into the phone, tapping his index finger on his chin while his leg bounced as it crossed the other.

Dark eyes stared, waiting for the conversation to finish, listening to the irrational voice on the other end of the phone from the opposite end of the couch.

"He _did_?" Kakashi's voice stretched. "Spray paint? Hm…he's under age to buy it (1); I don't know how he even got his hands on it."

Onyx eyes slowly roamed to the bookshelf, the top littered with spray paint cans, before flicking back to the other man who simply shrugged.

"_Clean_ it? Well, I can't say I can promise anything. He isn't a student anymore, and you can't prove he did it. It could have been one of the girls for all you know having over heard you and announcing it for him. Unless you have evidence, he can't be punished or held accountable."

Kakashi nodded with a light smile, "Yes, I am the devil. My son reminds me quite often. He once bought me a pitch fork for my birthday, and colored my pancakes red to remind me of the fire I bathe in. But anyway…if the announcement is out, I should get busy transferring my son back to Konoha Public High…"

The grayed man bobbed his head from side to side, "I don't prefer to shove things up there, but I do hope Tsunade, we can remain friends once everyone cools down. Have a wonderful day."

Kakashi pulled the phone away, his thumb sliding over the end button and smiling towards Itachi and causing his eyes to close tightly.

"Well, my boy is on the move. I suppose we should be as well. I have a principle I need to see."

Itachi nodded, "And I have things to explain at Academia if they get word."

Kakashi stood, still smiling, "Who knew love could be this…"

The impassive man stood, turning towards the door with a smirk, "_Powerful_."

* * *

Sakura waited as she stared at her friend, Ino on her tip-toes behind the mass of pink hair and looked at Naru-chan as well. The thought-to-be girl looked uneasy; shifting from foot to foot, staring at the ground, playing with her fingers and skirt and hair.

Naruto wasn't sure when he had managed to pull his hand free from Sasuke's, but he remembered it involved a lot of tugging and earned him a growl that had Naruto thinking of a rather angry bear. _  
_  
The blonde began to whisper, his voice whether girlish or boyish was not detectible at that level, "Sakura-chan, I need to tell you something. You as well Ino-chan."

Sakura's brow furrowed, her head twitched to the side and her emerald eyes stared as she waited, "Naru-chan, what's wrong? Why are you so worried?"

Her delicate hand reached out towards his shoulder, and slowly, he moved back and away; his eyes closing as his face stayed facing the ground during the interaction.

"Naru? What's going on?" Ino threw her hands on her hips.

Sakura frowned, and her features softened to a saddened face, "Did he really not want to see me that much? Are you mad at me?"

Naruto bumped into Sasuke and breathed out a sigh of relief, his eyes closed and he remembered their moment that they shared. He remembered exactly why he was doing this, exactly why he was telling the girl he thought was the girl of his dreams she wasn't.

"No, Sakura, that's not it." He whispered.

"Then what?" She said shakily.

Naruto looked up, his face determined, his eyes locking with hers, and his hand reaching for the wig, "I'm _not_ 'Naru-chan'. I'm Kiba."

Naruto took off the wig, the pins dropping again the ground, and he reached another hand up and ruffled his hair to life.

The blonde cleared his throat, "I'm not even Kiba, _that_ is Kiba." A tan hand blindly pointed behind him.

"I lied to you, which is the worst thing I could do."

Sakura shook her head, "Wha-"

"My father's name is Kakashi, my best friend is named Kiba and I have no brother. I'm just a regular guy from Konoha High School. In a desperate attempt to get to know you, I dressed as a girl to get into the school you were attending. What I did was wrong, I lied to you, and not only that, I was selfish and dragged my friends into the mix. I lead you on with this person '_Kiba'_ after I found someone else when I realized…when I realized I didn't feel anything for you…because I couldn't _see_ you. Just like you couldn't really see Sasuke."

Love made you see someone completely.

"Bu-but Sasuke-kun…" She started with her eyes tearing.

Naruto's mouth bobbed open and closed, not knowing what to say.

"I knew," Sasuke began, "the whole time."

"So you're _really_ dating him?" Ino questioned in a dead tone.

Naruto's heart drummed erratically in his chest. This was it; this was the moment he was waiting for. If Sasuke was ready to announce that they were together.

"I'm with him."

And then immediately following, the second thing Naruto had been waiting for, the sting that erupted against his cheek after Sakura's palm whipped across his face in a slap.

"What in the hell were you thinking?" She whispered, her eyes shimmering.

She was hurt, and Naruto knew that was coming. Not only had he won Sasuke, but she had _finally_ felt something for someone else, and he was a lie. He had lied, a lot. He had falsely befriended her like she had tried and in the end, pulled the rug right out of under her feet.

In the end, she befriended him, without the falseness without realizing it, and she was hurt.

He expected the slap.

Naruto turned to face her after his face whipped away, "I _was_ thinking only about you. I risked so many things, and so many people. Now, I'm only thinking about everyone else. I'm untying what I've done. I got over the idea of you, and got back on track with my life…with them. With him. Not ideas."

Ino grabbed the door, "You've accomplished that! _Goodbye!_"

Sakura stood back, one hand covering her mouth while her eyes were slammed shut, and the other fisted to her side. Just like that, Naruto felt nothing. He wasn't ashamed, embarrassed, and he didn't regret what he did. He was upset he hurt her, but, one day she would get over that pain.

So he easily let it all go. One day, she would understand the meaning of his words, everything he said along the way, and she would be able to let go of everything and move on.

Naruto nodded, "Goodbye."

Then, the door slammed in his face, and Sasuke gently grabbed his hand.

As the couple turned, hand in hand, and he turned to face his new and old group of friends; he suddenly forgot what had taken place.

Because looking at Sasuke's small smile, that engulfed Naruto's entire world, nothing else mattered.

* * *

Everyone ended up back at Naruto's house, even Temari and Shikamaru.

Naruto changed out of his girl clothes for the last time, and called Sasuke into his room. After ignoring the sex jokes from Kiba and Temari, he asked Sasuke for help picking up all the clothes and make-up and accessories to donate. He gave a few shirts to Hinata, knowing she would drowned in them, and offered some clothes to Temari, knowing her curves would compensate.

In the end, he was joyous to stand there side by side with Sasuke and get rid of everything, and start all over.

The blonde had nagged and nagged Sasuke about studying for finals, considering this was it before graduation, but Sasuke ignored him. He wanted to stay. This was a new beginning and he wanted to relish in it. He could study for finals later, and it wasn't like he really needed to. It was more like something he did for show – studying.

Naruto and Sasuke attacked the kitchen for everyone. Naruto attempting to cook and Sasuke was right behind him fixing his mistakes. Everyone ventured outside and played street hockey – in sneakers – without goalies in light of the upcoming Stanly Cup Finals. Temari even convinced Shikamaru to play which had Sasuke's mouth hanging open till Naruto sweetly closed it. The blonde convinced Kiba to play him one on one in basketball after everyone claimed 'tired' after three games of hockey, and downed endless amounts of _Gatorade._

Eventually, people tapered off to home. Temari and Hinata claimed showers, Shikamaru claimed sleep, and Kiba claimed something that wasn't caught in his grumble after he lost the second game in a row.

The blonde slung his shirts over his shoulder and dragged his feet sluggishly against the grass while Sasuke walked next to him, his own shirts dangling out of his pockets.  
The two of them glistened in the setting sun, relishing in the light Spring breeze while they silently contemplated at least putting on their undershirts.

They decided against it.

"Where did you learn to play hockey?"

The blonde looked over, as if just realizing Sasuke was there, and slung his arm around his shoulder and threw half his weight on him. The raven grunted and threw his arm around his waist anyway, his hand resting on glistening tan skin.

"In Suna. There was a hockey league there that Kiba and I were in."

Sasuke paused, distracted slightly by the feel of Naruto's sweaty skin glistening in the sun like a Greek God sent directly to him from the heavens as a gift. The raven snapped out of his stupor, "Suna is far off…"

Naruto reached for the door handle and kicked the door open as they turned sideways to walk in, his hand twitching on Sasuke's shoulder as he itched to run it along the toned muscles of his broad shoulders that…

The blonde shook his head, "We got up at four in the morning to drive there. My dad's friend coached… really weird guy, freaked the hell out of me. Name was Gai. Always wore green spandex, yelled all the time, and always ranted something about youth. And shit if he didn't exhaust us with warm-ups before we even got to practice. The man was fucking nuts."

Sasuke dumped Naruto onto the couch with a hopeless flop, "Why'd you quit?"

"Well, school got harder and the work load got heavier, and damn it all if that freaky asshole didn't give me a phobia of green for awhile."

The raven snorted as he walked to the kitchen and grabbed two bottles of water and returned, sitting down next to Naruto and passing one off.

Blue eyes turned their attention to Sasuke, "Where did you learn to play? Your slap shot scared the shit out of me."

Sasuke's deep laugh sent a shiver up Naruto's spine, "Itachi. He actually played in a league in Suna till he left for college. They were National Champions three years in a row when he was captain. So, I asked him to teach me to play."

The blonde snorted, "I can't believe that ass actually played a sport. He seems the type to wear some dark trench coat, run around in a gang and cause a lot of trouble for you and your parents."

A dark, delicate eyebrow rose, "What the hell makes you say that?"

Naruto shrugged, "The attitude."

"But the hockey thing fit?"

The blonde nodded, and they agreed in unison, "_Jason_."

-0-0-

Sasuke eventually tried to make his leave to go face his serial murderer, horror-film sense of a brother once the two realized night was about to fall. Naruto insisted he would be fine by himself, he was an only child, and there were instances when Kakashi's attention disorder side tracked him from getting home at a reasonable time.

The two stood from the couch, Naruto feeling polite enough to stand to say his goodbye.

The blonde raised himself barely on his toes, laughing a little under his breath, "I don't know when the transfer is going to be done."

"So you aren't going to school tomorrow?"

"Nope. So, chauffeur, you get a day off." The blonde laughed, wrapping his arms around Sasuke's neck.

"Idiot."

"Funny, I was going to call you a bastard."

Sasuke rested his forehead against Naruto's, his eyes rolling, "I love you."

The raven smirked at the blush that suddenly covered tan cheeks before the blonde smiled back and replied, "I love you, too."

"Look at that…no stuttering this time." Sasuke smirked when Naruto punched his rib cage.

"You know what's funny?" Naruto didn't have to pull away to know Sasuke raised an eyebrow, "Now that we aren't putting on a show, and everything is undone, I feel like I have to...there's just…I mean…I have to…" (2)

"Be less of a dobe?"

"Oh damn you to hell teme!" The blonde snapped and tried to step back.

The raven latched a hand on the back of Naruto neck, firmly keeping the blonde in place and smirked when Naruto stomped his foot, "I know."

Naruto easily pressed back against Sasuke's lips when they met his, and easily melted when the somewhat harsh grab left and went to cupping his cheek.

The blonde figured he would never understand how Sasuke put on the '_sweet guy_' act for as long as he did in front of anyone, because he still seemed to struggle with it when it was just the two of them behind closed doors.

The blonde made to pull his head back, their lips barely disconnecting before Sasuke's other hand came up to grab the back of a blonde head and connect their lips again.  
Naruto winced slightly at the harsh contact, and barely put effort into hitting Sasuke before his own fingers sunk deeply into raven silk hair.

Naruto didn't waste time with tongue swipes or anything of that nature before he simply opened his mouth and was instantly greeted with Sasuke's invading tongue.

Sasuke pushed their clothed chests together and the blond mentally patted himself on the back for willing the two of them to put clothing on; he knew that touch would have set something off. The blonde moaned lightly into the kiss when he felt Sasuke's hand leave his face and manage to find its way up his shirt to roam quickly in caressing touches, the raven pushing away enough to start inching his way towards Naruto's nipple.

The blonde pulled back from the quickly heated kiss, panting for air and tightened his grip on Sasuke's hair when the raven attached himself to the sensitive tan neck.

"What the h-hell got into you, bastard?"

Sasuke kissed his way up Naruto's neck and up the jaw line until he was met with rosy red lips of the blonde, "The fact that it's all undone."

The blonde laughed lightly in the kiss that Sasuke initiated this time around, his heart beating erratically at the thought that Sasuke was just as excited as he was. Naruto really shouldn't have been surprised, love meant so many things, and being with someone was one of them.

The blonde reached for Sasuke's shirt as a thumb grazed over Naruto's nipple, sending the blonde shivers from the contact as he opened his mouth to accept Sasuke's tongue once again.

Suddenly, without warning whatsoever, the door swung open wildly, and the two pulled their faces apart at the sound of what sounded like cackling underneath the sound of reprimanding.

"Naruto Uzumaki!"

Tan arms snapped away like rubber bands, and the blonde took a step away from the suddenly confused raven, wondering what the hell just happened.

He had only managed to blink and Naruto had moved away. The warmth, the erratic beating of his heart, the huffing of his breath, and those wonderful sounds that were managing to leak from his mouth.

Sasuke was going to kill who ruined it.

Onyx eyes landed on Kakashi, and instantly, he wasn't surprised. But when he found another man standing next to him, his hands on his hips and his foot tapping impatiently, he was more along the lines of confused. He had tan skin that didn't match up to Naruto's – though no ones did, his eyes were dark and a scar ran across the bridge of his nose. The brunette hair was worn in a tall pony-tail atop his head, and for some reason, Naruto seemed to turn into a little kid around this man.

"Sasuke-kun…if I were you, I'd run before you get a four hour lecture on sex, the safety of, and why you shouldn't be doing it with his little Naruto-kun."

The young Uchiha glared at Kakashi and shifted his hard look at the other man, and quickly left, having seen that look one time, and one time only from his mother.

What a scary look that could be.

* * *

Naruto lay in bed that night after Kakashi and Iruka decided to head out early to a midnight release of a movie they had been excited to see, and grabbing a late dinner before the flick. Iruka had the next day off after he had fainted in school once his lover came in and announced everything that had been taking place. The vice-principle Asuma asked that he take a day off to simply calm down and think rationally.

It took the afternoon for Kakashi to explain everything properly and in depth. Why Naruto had done it and why he himself agreed to help his son. How his son found the love of his life, and was the reason the blonde decided to back out of his whole ordeal.

Iruka understood, and after slapping Kakashi as hard as he possibly could for keeping him in the dark, accepted everything.

Naruto was his only son, he cherished him and whether he'd admit it or not, he'd do anything for him. Even if that meant dressing him in drag and sending him off to an all girl's school.  
The blonde grabbed his phone, flipping it open and closed over and over wondering if Sasuke would be awake. Either that, or if he would be mad about waking him.

Naruto ran his fingers along the keyboard, entering a text message and wincing as he sent it.

"Really, I should apologize…Iruka is irrational." Naruto mumbled into the dark.

The blonde jumped, his tan hands fumbling with the vibrating phone that had Sasuke's face flashing across the screen, the words _My Teme_ flashing over the picture.

Naruto flipped open the phone, pressing it to his ear to be greeted by a groggy voice.

"_Do all idiots not know how to sleep, or is it just mine?_"

Naruto chuckled breathlessly at the second part of the sentence, possessive or not, it made his heart drum. "Sorry bastard, I was just trying to apologize for Iruka-sensei…apparently I shouldn't have."

The blonde smiled at the snort, "_Just at a civilized hour. What, did you just finish the sex lecture and he thought about letting you out of your shackles?_"

Tan cheeks puffed, "No! He _didn't_ give me a sex talk, jackass. He gave me one two years ago after he had his first date with my father…"

"_I wonder why…_"

"But before they left as Kakashi was dragging him out the door, he did give me this can of pepper spray." Naruto dangled the key chain from his index finger.

"_I'm _nothing_ like your father…_"

Naruto laughed into the phone, "What makes you think…"

"_The same thing that made you laugh_."

The blonde jumped and made a sound close to a yelping noise when a clap of thunder sounded, catching him by surprise. Naruto fumbled and scrambled to grab his cell phone that he had dropped and listened to the sentence finish.

"…_to be scared of thunder._"

A tan index finger held open the blinds, watching as the flash of lightening illuminated the sky to show off the large looming clouds. "And leave it to you to point out the obvious. You live up to being a bastard for sure."

Sasuke sighed, "_You want me to come over, don't you_?"

"You said it! See you soon!"

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Sasuke opened the front door to find a lump of blankets on the couch known as Naruto. The blonde had huddled and buried himself in the thickness of the comfort and warmth of the blankets (after unlocking the door) till Sasuke had arrived in his pajamas once again.

The raven was tempted – barely – to jump on the pile.

So he sat there with Naruto after digging him out. They put on another crackpot comedy; he made him a tray full of instant ramen and soda and cranked the volume on the television.

"Dobe, any closer and you'll be in my damn lap." Sasuke growled when the sound of fading thunder from the second set of storms barely fluttered through the air.

"Teme, any colder and you'll be a … oh wait, you are a frigid, cold-hearted prick."

Sasuke snorted, leaning over and kissing his temple, "You're just radiating love tonight."

The blonde turned, his blue eyes in slits and his lips pursed, "And you were St. Valentine when you threw the soda at my head."

The raven turned down the commercial during the E3 conference that had Naruto mostly distracted from the storm while Sasuke tried his best to talk about other pointless and interesting enough things to keep the blonde distracted.

The young Uchiha sighed as he uncrossed his arms and threw one over Naruto's tensed shoulders to have a blonde head fall back on the limb with a relieved sigh. Sasuke's eyes flicked over to watch golden eyelashes flutter, trying desperately to stay open while his eyes stared at an awkward angle at the television that replayed the game convention the blonde had gone on and on about.

The raven shifted, barely moving his arm that lay under a golden head and reached his other hand across to rake through bright locks.

Naruto's blue eyes struggled to open, "Dobe, you should go to bed."

The blonde head only managed to shake lightly, Naruto barely containing a yawn and Sasuke not being able to contain an eye roll.

"Should I pour water on the ground and toss you there to let you sleep? Seems comfortable to you."

Onyx eyes watched as a tan middle finger rose in his direction, and even spared a chuckle as the gesture was dropped. Sasuke sighed, gripping Naruto's shoulder with his hand, he heaved them both up with a chuckle when watching the blonde's head bobble slightly.

"Dobe, you need to walk."

The blonde mumbled something incoherent before Sasuke rolled his eyes and limply dropped him back on the couch.

Blue eyes snapped open before narrowing into a glare, "You, asshole, are a bastard."

"So I've heard. Grab your blankets."

The raven yanked Naruto back onto his feet as Naruto draped his blankets over himself in a blinding manner to leave Sasuke to steer them down the hall towards the blonde's room; the young Uchiha was half tempted to let him walk into a wall.

Sasuke opened the door and grabbed the blankets so Naruto could walk into his room without being blinded and not with _another_ hazard for tripping.

The raven walked silently over to Naruto's bed and laid his blankets out on his bed politely and smoothed them out while the blonde changed behind him.

By the thumps Sasuke heard behind him, he was guessing it was more _attempting_ to change.

The raven turned to find the blonde trying to stuff his head into the sleeve of his shirt while his new boxers had managed to be put on backwards.

Sasuke sighed and made his way over to the tired and struggling blonde with a shake of the head and plucked the rather familiar shirt off, "Dobe, just leave it off and get to bed. _After_ you put your boxers on the right way."

Tired eyes looked down at his boxers and let out a long sigh while Sasuke turned around and began refolding his own shirt with a light laugh.

His head snapped to the side when he heard the shuffling of feet and watched as Naruto walked over and flopped face first onto the blankets he neatly laid on the bed. Thankfully, the boxers on the right way.

Sasuke set down the shirt on the dresser and walked over to the bed and sat on the edge, "Dobe, most people get under the covers."

The blonde grumbled something under his breath which made Sasuke shake his head and stand, pulling the blankets out from underneath the blonde with excessive force. The Uchiha pulled the blankets over the blonde and got under them himself once Naruto latched onto his wrist and lightly asked him to stay a little longer.

Sasuke turned to the blonde as he slid his arm around Naruto's waist and pulled him closer, "Dobe, I'm going to have to go…"

The blonde let out a noise to signal his displeasure which made Sasuke snort, "I'll see you tomorrow."

Sasuke threw the blanket off the two of them, shifting to barely hover over Naruto and dropping his head so their foreheads rested together, "I love you."

Naruto's bright blue eyes slowly began to shine in the dark room and locked with the midnight eyes, his face lighting with a smile, "I love you too."

"Now go to sleep, I'll come by when I get out of school so you can sleep in." Sasuke whispered when Naruto's heavy lids began to work against him.

"You should skip…" The blonde whispered and was close to slurring.

Sasuke snorted, "After school. Go to sleep."

Sasuke connected their lips softly, his eyelids sliding shut when he felt Naruto return the pressure gently after mumbling something about him skipping school again. Sasuke tried to pull away from the kiss, but the blonde easily followed with his lips locked and lifting his head from the bed. Sasuke smirked into the kiss, pressing harder until Naruto's head was against the mattress and went to pull away once more so his dobe could sleep.

Sasuke's eyes snapped open when he felt Naruto begin nibbling on his bottom lip and felt fingers began to curl around his shirt. Naruto's mouth opened and a huff of breath assaulted a pale face. Sasuke's tongue instantly darted out of his mouth, skimming across a rosy bottom lip and enjoyed the harsher, desperate huff that was panted out. Their tongues wrestled for a moment as the raven adjusted himself to hover overtop the blonde comfortably in between his legs, an instant memory spark pulling him away from the blonde's mouth.

Pale petal lips began to roam along a tan jaw line, growling when the blonde underneath him began to wiggle away, and instantly silencing the threat when he felt the blonde pulling at his pajama pants.

The raven took his upon himself to clamp down harder than necessary on the tan neck he had roamed to when the blonde gave up his feeble attempt at the pants, and became rather persistent with Sasuke's shirt.

"Fuck you, bastard." Naruto shot as he removed the garment and glared, now fully awake.

"Naruto, don't you-" Sasuke tried to reason, his sensibility still active.

Tan fingers embedded themselves into raven silk hair and yanked Sasuke firmly back down to lock their lips again before pulling back.

"Damn you! No, I don't think!"

Sasuke gave him an awkward look, his breath still trying to catch.

"Dobe," Sasuke began softly, "this time I want to make sure you're sure, and not let your…anatomy make the decision for you."

The blonde snorted, lifting his head and connecting their lips softly, "Yes bastard. Or else I wouldn't have attempted to jump you in _my_ bed. And you call me the idiot."

Their lips connected softly again, and Sasuke used the pressure to push Naruto's head against the mattress while his fingertips danced around the tan upper-half of exposed skin.

It felt like electric currents shooting through Naruto's body that charged straight through his groin. The blonde whimpered as he arched into the touches, and cursed under his breath at the noise that escaped him.

It was like Sasuke was made just for him. Every kiss, their lips molded together perfectly. Their bodies fit together like two pieces of a puzzle, and every touch made them both go completely haywire. Naruto knew no one else would ever be able to do this to him.

Tan fingers managed to barely reach the hem of Sasuke's pants to attempt to pull at them while the hovering raven sucked on a certain spot below Naruto's ear that had the blonde biting his bottom lip to keep the noise down.

There was a first time for everything.

And with one rocking movement of Sasuke's hips, their clothed erections pressing against the other, Naruto just didn't care anymore.

The room was quickly filled with heavy panting and noises from the wet kissing as their lips harshly connected with the other's skin. Occasionally, they would find a particular spot that would drive the other wild and hover there longer than necessary. Naruto found a spot on the right side of Sasuke's neck, and the raven found a spot behind the blonde's ear.

Their rhythm was slow and tortuous to themselves and each other; trying to stay in the moment as long as they could hold out, and building the lust far past the point of sensibility.  
Sasuke's fingers roamed back down to the hem of Naruto's boxers, his hips rocking into the boys' underneath of him and smirking at the noises he was causing before tugging on the garment in a silent question.

Naruto pressed their lips together in a steamy kiss and pushed them upwards, the two of them shuffling on the bed to get on their knees while struggling to stay connected at the lips and breathe out of their noses harshly.

The two of them disconnected suddenly, Sasuke hands going to Naruto's boxers and pushing him back on the bed and quickly relieving him of the clothing. The blonde made to take off Sasuke's clothes but the raven impatiently did it for him before leaning to hover back over him, careful to not have their erections touch.

Sasuke's tongue traced a hot trail up Naruto's neck, his pale pink lips coming to rest at a tan ear lobe. He gently nibbled before hot breath cascaded against the shell of Naruto's ear, causing the sensation to go straight to his groin.

"I swear Naruto, next time it will be slow and passionate and I'll have it burned in your damn brain for the rest of your life. But right now I'm going to have you begging, gasping, moaning, screaming and just to boost my ego I'll have you chanting my name," Sasuke made his voice low and husky, "like it's the only thing that will get you off."

Blue eyes rolled slightly back, a huff escaped reddened lips, while he held back a moan as a free roaming hand attacked his exposed erection.

"Right now Naruto all I need…" Sasuke huffed when Naruto sucked lightly on his pulse point, stopping to lick lightly, "all I need is you."

The young Uchiha blinked when he heard the blonde growl on his neck, sending a tingling vibration that went straight to his groin, "All I need is for you to-"

The blonde let out a tiny moan, cutting off his sentence midway, as the palm of Sasuke's hand rubbed circles around the tip of his cock, causing him to shiver uncontrollably at the sensation.

Lust fogged the rest of the thought process that Naruto was trying to get a grip on while Sasuke began stroking him at a painfully slow pace, his own arousal prodding Naruto in his exposed thigh.

Naruto tried to reach for it blindly, but Sasuke just barely tightened his grip on blonde locks and stopped his movements and whispered in his ear, "Tell me what you want…"

The blonde bit down hard on his lip at the husky tone and the visuals that flashed in his mind, racing just from one sentence and mixing it with the drug of lust.

Naruto arched into the strokes when the pace quickened, "Tell me, Naruto…"

Blue eyes rolled back as lids fluttered closed in pleasure, "_Fuck_ Sasuke…"

Sasuke's hand went back to stroking him at a painfully slow pace, his lips attacking an exposed tan neck while the blonde underneath him let out delectable noises that drove him further into his lust and away from his sensibility.

"I want…" Naruto panted, fisting Sasuke's hair, "I _need_…."

Blue eyes rolled back as his eyelids fluttered down in pleasure and slow torture. Sasuke's lips and tongue began working Naruto's skin and body as Sasuke's hand left him, causing the blonde to arch off the bed to try and grind their erections together.

Sasuke made his way down to the blonde's collar bone where he sucked harshly twice leaving two screaming red marks and smirking down at his work possessively before moving on.  
The raven slowly kissed his way down the middle of Naruto's chest, and slowly down his stomach, pausing each time the blonde would whimper or whine just to add to the pleasurable torture that he was causing.

Sasuke's hand began to attack Naruto's length at another slow and tortuous speed while the raven sucked on the tan hip that he reached in his decent, smirking devilishly up at the blonde, "Remember, dobe. Don't forget my name. Now…tell me."

"YOU! That!...That's what I want da-damn it, you!" Naruto tried to hold back a shutter, "_Please_, shit, please Sasuke!" Naruto panted, his fingers digging into raven silk hair and effectively pulling Sasuke's hand off of his length to stop his teasing, their eyes locking. "How many times do I have to say it!? Fuck me. Is that better!?"

The young Uchiha smirked and raised himself back up to completely hover over the blonde in an instant at the last demand. The two of them shifted back and situated themselves back into the far corner of the bed, close to the wall and away from the dangers of falling off.

One digit was put to rosy lips, Naruto's eyes flicking down to the pale index finger and looking up at Sasuke's onyx eyes that were causing chills.  
The finger ran along the bottom lip, tracing it before pushing on the seam, and Naruto opened his mouth to allow the innocent finger to enter.

The blonde's lids fluttered to half-mast as he unconsciously closed his lips around the digit, sucking on it seductively and winding his tongue around it sensually.  
Naruto relished in the sound of the groan that came from the hovering raven, and mentally patted himself of the back when he occasionally felt him shiver.

His brow furrowed, though, when another finger probed his mouth, and before he knew it a third.

Sasuke rocked his hips and caused their erections to grind together; Naruto's head throwing itself back against the mattress and his mouth opening in a moan.  
Naruto gasped, licking his dry lips and wondering where the sweet tasting fingers had gone before he felt the warm pleasuring tickle of Sasuke's breath next to his ear once more.

"Lift you legs a little, dobe."

Naruto complied when the hot, commanding whispering voice hit his ear, and he instantly regretted it.

The blonde felt a finger probe his entrance, one of the very fingers he had sucked, and clamped down on his lower lip and slammed his eyes shut when the finger passed into the ring of muscles.

The blonde hissed in discomfort and squirmed, and wiggled when he felt a tickling touch run down from his chest to his navel, "Relax…"

Naruto tried to think of relaxing things as he tried to will his body to calm itself while the finger was pulled out and gently pushed back in. The process was full of discomfort, and Naruto would swear to his dying day that it took years because that's what it felt like. Sasuke would pause every time the blonde would seize up in discomfort, and would mutter apologies and he planted chaste kisses anywhere he could find. The blonde smiled when he realized the tensing muscles didn't refuse the probing finger any longer, and most of the discomfort was gone.

"Sasuke…" Naruto practically whimpered, seeming impatient.

The teen regretted it once more when a second finger was added to the equation, causing the tension to return.

"Bastard..." The blonde half growled, half panted.

Naruto wiggled again when he felt soft kisses and licks erupt on his inner thigh in a comforting gesture while the fingers withdrew and sunk themselves back in, and Naruto found himself crying out when Sasuke scissored his fingers. The process was slow like it was with the first finger, Sasuke taking his time and making sure not to hurt Naruto, checking to make sure he was fully adjusted to everything. And, to the blonde's constant surprise, apologizing when the blonde would imply that he was in pain.

By three fingers, Naruto was chanting obscenities like they were his life line, and he quickly realized between that and the tender kisses it was the only thing keeping him relaxed.  
That was, until Sasuke made white erupt.

The raven curled his fingers, angling his wrist and listened and watched as the blonde arched off the bed and moaned a foul word mixed with his name when he struck his prostate.

"_Shi'ske_ …stop t-teasing me!"

Sasuke smirked dangerously in a predatorily way as his eyes went aflame, withdrawing his fingers and whispering promises of pleasure, and his voice causing Naruto to groan under his breath alone.

"Sasuke…" Naruto whispered as Sasuke came to hover atop of him and arch so their heated chests touched momentarily.

Naruto welcomed the fiery kiss they shared; opening his mouth and instantly winding his tongue around Sasuke's, allowing them to dance. He barely heard the cap pop off of something, and somewhere past the fogged part of his brain and in the sensible part of his mind, he assumed it was the lotion he had bought after their pointless argument.

He felt Sasuke shiver around the time the Uchiha nibbled on his lip, and he moaned into the kiss when their muscles receded and their lips mashed together tightly.

The raven pulled away, grabbing at Naruto's legs and putting his knees one at a time over his shoulders, and dropped his face down for one more lingering kiss.

Naruto was the one who pulled back as Sasuke's erection probed his entrance and caused him to hiss, pushing past the ring of muscles and unconsciously making him tense.

Sasuke pushed himself in slowly, his eyes almost closed in concentration from not thrusting completely into Naruto, and not pulling out at the pained expression the blonde was making.  
Onyx eyes opened when he was buried in Naruto's body, listening to the blonde pant as beads of sweat gently rolled off his forehead and caused a few strands of lightly blonde hair to stick to his forehead.

The blonde made to move, but one hand that squeezed on his thigh stopped him before Sasuke leaned down slowly and carefully to kiss him.

"Be patient. Adjust. _Then_ beg me…" Sasuke smirked.

The blonde glared, and gasped when roaming fingers teased a nipple, "Y…Y-you should be…_begg_…begging me, bastard."

Sasuke let the two of them catch their breath, his hand rubbing Naruto's thigh soothingly and the other had began running up and down his side. It took a minute before the blonde had relaxed completely around him.

The raven tightened his grip on the tan thigh, and readied his hand next to Naruto's bright blonde head, "Then by all means…are you ready?"

The blonde nodded, his mouth just barely hanging open.

Sasuke lowered his voice to the sultry, husky voice that turned Naruto to mush, "Fuck, Naruto…please-"

"Do it!" The blonde panted, not being able to stand it.

Pale fingers curled into the orange sheets under the blonde, his breath choking at the sensation as he pulled out slightly and thrust back in. Tan fingers reached for the pale glistening shoulders; one hand holding on to Sasuke's shoulder and one hand digging into silky raven hair. The raven pulled out further watching Naruto's jaw go slack when he thrust back in.

The room began to fill with heavy panting and Naruto's moaning, and occasionally a kiss could be heard when their lips couldn't stand to be apart. Tan toes would curl in pleasure with each thrust Sasuke would aim towards his prostate, and the blonde would whimper when the next thrust would miss.

"Sa-Sasuke…Sasuke…Sasuke…" The blonde chanted in between thrusts, his head thrown back and his eyes barely able to stay open.

The raven smirked possessively as sweat beaded off of his forehead and beads rolled down his chest, "Just keeping…promises."

Naruto let out a loud moan and let his eyes lock with Sasuke's when his hand found his abandoned member and began stroking in time with each thrust that was sent right to Naruto's prostate.

Naruto fingers unwound their way from raven silk hair and gripped the back of the slick pale neck while the other still dug into his shoulder blade.

The two let noises slip while their breaths met in midair, Sasuke's thrusting becoming more erratic, their breathing becoming more filled with gasps and grunts. The blonde let his vision play with white while his stomach began to pool with pleasurable warmth, and the next thrust sent him arching off the bed and tumbling over the edge. Sasuke followed soon after when Naruto tightened around him, making the pleasure too much to handle anymore.

Sasuke gave a few more shaky thrusts with a few more pumps with his shivering hand to let the two of them ride out and milk their orgasms to the fullest extent before tenderly pulling out of Naruto.

The raven had to use ever bit of will power he ever accumulated to not collapse on top of the blonde beneath him and landing on the mess they created.

Sasuke gently situated Naruto's legs to a more comfortable position before leaning down and kissing him sweetly on the lips, when he pulled back, the blonde was snoring.  
The raven chuckled underneath his breath and scooped up a towel from the floor, cleaning up the mess as best as could, and grumbling without threat as he put Naruto's boxers back on.

When the young Uchiha had his own boxers on himself, he awkwardly shuffled the blonde around on the bed and stripped the bed of the sheets and tiredly dumped them on the floor with a grumble.

And finally, Sasuke lay down on the bed, scooped the blonde up in his arms and settled into a peaceful sleep with Naruto snoring lightly against his chest.

-0-0-

Kakashi leaned against the doorframe of his son's room, Iruka standing on his toes to see why it was taking the man so long to go in and just wake his son up.

They did have an announcement to make after all.

"We'll let them sleep." Kakashi murmured.

Iruka's eyes finally landed on the pair that was wrapped snuggly under Naruto's blankets with a fond smile. Sasuke's arms were wrapped snugly around Naruto as the blonde was balled up with his face firmly planted against Sasuke's bare chest snoring lightly.

The brunette hummed as he wrapped his arms around Kakashi's midsection and laid his head against the taller man's back, smiling gently.

"I suppose it can wait till tomorrow."

The grayed man moved back, silently shutting the door and grabbing Iruka's hand as he led him down the hallway.

"And besides…I suppose too much excitement for Naruto in one day will kill him."

Iruka snorted with a shake of his head, "Kakashi, a marriage proposal must have changed you, because all you tried to do was 'excite' that kid into a heart attack. By the means of torturing and tormenting."

The man chuckled, "I suppose I should call Itachi and let him know Sasuke won't be coming home."

"The man who tortures Sasuke as much as you torture Naruto?"

Iruka didn't have to see Kakashi's face to know he was smiling.

He was still intent on giving his son a heart attack, just…not today.

-0-0- _First Semester – Freshman Year – College_ -0-0-  
-0-0- _Moving Day_ -0-0-

Blue eyes searched out the glass window as scenery passed by, changing quickly as they drove along in the car. The suburban neighborhood quickly transitioned to the bustling highway and interstate, packed with cars, vans, trucks and semis. Bumper to bumper traffic and occasionally a free flowing ride lead them to a more secluded, rural area with a peaceful atmosphere five hours later.

Trees were everywhere summer-sky blues eyes landed, spread out or clumped together; different types as far as he could see. Sidewalks would taper off into dirt pathways into the woods for venturing and hiking. The grass was catered to and nurtured, a beautiful plush green with not a blade out of place.

Indeed, the privet college was looking to be something Naruto was looking forward too, especially since Sasuke took a year off, and was going with him.

"Is there anything else around here?" The blonde asked from the back seat.

He felt a pressure on his hand, curling around his fingers and he returned it, turning to glance into dark pools, "There is an all girl's private college not too far from here."

Naruto glanced to the front of the car and eyed the tall, gray mass of hair that belonged to his father that sat directly in front of him in the passenger seat, "I'll have to tell Jiraya."

The blonde was startled when a voice sounded behind him, thinking the grown man was taking a nap, "Kakashi, you will _not_ tell that damn pervert."

Naruto smiled lightly, looking over his shoulder at the scarred man and his father's now husband with a fond smile as he settled himself back in for a few more moments of peaceful sleep.

"Hn."

Sasuke glared at Itachi as the older sibling drove on; the two of them _not_ wanting the adults to come along seeing as how they could have moved into the dorms and drive themselves.

They were insistent.

Naruto turned his attention back out the window and his attention was caught by a group of three girls all wearing an identical uniform. The blonde smiled wistfully as his head followed the girls as they disappeared from view, and he went rigid when he felt Sasuke's lips next to his ear.

"Don't even think about it, dobe."

The blonde turned, their noses ghosting against each other and he spared Sasuke a cheeky grin with a chuckle. "It was only a passing thought, teme. Relive my glory days."

Sasuke pressed his lips gently against Naruto's, absently tracing a finger along a scar on his cheek while he chuckled against his lips.

Besides, Naruto enjoyed his boxers far more than briefs.

* * *

Author's Notes (loooong and winded):  
(1) Where I live, you have to be the legal age of eighteen to buy spray paint, and they actually card you.  
(2) Before everyone asks me what Naruto was trying to get at, he feels like there's more pressure on him now to be a good boyfriend to Sasuke now that everything is undone.  
Well, for some, this is it. And I do advise if you _don't_ like Sakura to please not read the Epilogue. How you got this far _not_ liking Sakura I will never know, but I love you all anyway. (Wanna hug? I like hugs…and cookies. Damn I want a cookie.)  
For those of you who liked the ending and are happy with it, thank you for sticking with me and enjoying my fiction as much as I enjoyed writing it. For those of you who want to know what the hell happened with everyone else…I wrote something a little extra to wrap things up.  
- For those of you waiting for the sequel to ALLTF, I swear to any and everything I haven't forgotten about you. I've been working on and I'm hoping to start posting it soon. Just keep an eye on my profile.  
SO…with that, thank you all so very, very much. And to some, I'll see you at the Epi.  
-Nevi


	30. Epilogue

Chapter 30: Epilogue - How to Say Forever

Author's Notes (long, winded, and taking too long to get to the point):  
-I want to start out by saying a BIG THANK YOU for all the support I received during this fiction (as well as well wishes for my mother – she loved them). But, we're here at the end of the road.  
- A DOUBLE THANK YOU for the reviews, they've been absolutely fucking amazing. Really, you guys made me feel like the luckiest author on this site.  
- I've been getting requests for a sequel, and I've already made the decision of _not_ doing one. Sorry. Okay, let's groan together. Wait, what? I missed the groan? Well boo.  
- If you've had any questions that I haven't answered, I'd rather you send me a short PM that is right to the point that I can get back to you on.  
- For those of you awaiting ALLTF's sequel, I'm working on it as much as I can. The only thing I can tell you is either watch my profile or put me on alert.  
So, I now present to you, the finale of All Eyes on You.  
_Curtain Call_

Disclaimer: I still don't own anything that will be mentioned that's already copyrighted.

Dedication: I have to thank my muses Taylor and Jen. They helped me through this fiction and listened to my insane ideas and fended off the rabid plot bunnies so I could finish this sucker.

Chapter 30: Epilogue – How to Say Forever

"Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away."  
-Louis de Bernières

* * *

"I don't want to do this."

"You have to."

"No, I don't."

"Hn."

There was a growl, "Uchiha, don't you fucking '_hn_' me you son-of-a-bitch."

"Uzumaki, don't you whine at me you _dumb_ son-of-a-bitch."

A chuckle sounded a little way off from the two bickering, "You would never think they were together."

There was a chime of laughter, "Let alone married."

"Kiba!" Said man turned to attention, "Tell this bastard I _don't_ have to do this!"

"Hinata…" Sasuke said cooler, though clearly irritated, "Tell him he does."

Kiba and Hinata turned to one another again, "You'd swear they were five…"

There was a cackle, and Naruto and Kiba visibly stiffened, "Dear Na-Na, you're doing this for the sake of our fair Hinata-chan. Please, why don't you just be so kind and enlighten her."

The blonde turned, pointing a finger in the face of his father, "How in the _hell_ did you get in my house!?"

The four were, in fact, in Sasuke and Naruto's house. They were getting ready for a party that the blonde wasn't ready for and swore he wouldn't ever be ready for. Sasuke tried to fix the unruly locks that had grown out slightly from the cropped look he had seven years ago when they first met, but the mess of blonde hair couldn't be tamed. Just like his loud ass mouth.

Naruto had done Sasuke's hair that he found joy in doing now, and thought it was somewhat humorous that the raven hair still had the same '_chickens ass_' style.

The usual changes had been made with age, the visible signs they're bodies had matured as well as the maturity that you would only see if you knew them.

Save for this argument…

The older grayed man held up a key, letting it twinkle in the light and allowing a memory to spark in Naruto's memory, "I am your father, Na-Na."

A scarred man appeared from behind his back, "The spare…he knows where you keep it."

The blonde sighed, "Next time Iruka, make him use the doorbell like civilized people."

The brunette raised an eyebrow and gave the blonde a look, and Naruto waved him off before turning back to Sasuke. "Right, right. My father is far from civilized. Did you leave the door opened for the other guests?"

Naruto went back to buttoning up Sasuke's shirt, which he had been doing before they started bickering, and the Uchiha began straightening the blonde's shirt collar.

"Kakashi," Sasuke began as he redid the buttons on Naruto's shirt with a shake of his head, "please be on your best behavior."

The blonde snorted as he watched the fingers do up the pale blue shirt, "Yeah right…hell will freeze over when my father behaves himself. Hell will freeze over if…"

"Hello, little brother."

Sasuke stiffened from doing up Naruto's shirt and ground his teeth together at the silent comment the blonde made, "Yeah, who wants to go ahead with this bullshit now, bastard?"

"Hey Naruto," Kiba laughed, "Good call. Sasuke's freezing this place with that cold ass look, and Satan himself just walked in."

The blonde turned, "I'd stop if I were you. He barely agreed to let me throw this engagement party for you, and if you keep up with that, he'll make it happen in the street in front of our houses."

Kiba sighed when Hinata took his hand and man smiled, "Really, I am thankful for this. You guys didn't have to throw a party for us."

Naruto waved him off when Sasuke finished his shirt and they stood side by side, "Come on! You two threw me and this anti-social bastard a party."

They heard a lazy sigh, "And what a troublesome party _that_ was."

The room turned to see Shikamaru walk in hand in hand with Temari, having come through the kitchen where the food had been placed with the drinks, "I grabbed some soda."

"Oh! Guys, everyone should grab food and stuff, we don't have to wait to eat for everyone else to get here, that's only the cake!"

Temari kissed Shikamaru on the cheek and walked off to get food while Sasuke silently walked off to get him and Naruto something since they had been so busy that day they hadn't eaten.

Guests continued to steadily come into the house while everyone stood around talking, and Kakashi opened the floor to Shikamaru.

"_So_," Kakashi began, eyeing Shikamaru, "when are you going to move forward with your lady, Shika?"

The man swirled his drink around in his red plastic cup, staring at it with his bored face, Shikamaru shrugged, using the free hand to rub at his cheek with his palm, "Tomorrow at three."

The room broke out in laughter as Temari came back into the room from the kitchen where the food had been set out for guests to come and go as they pleased, "What's so funny?"

Shikamaru took his plate with a lazy smile and gave her a kiss on the cheek before Kiba answered for everyone else.

"He was just telling us his grand plans to purpose tomorrow."

Temari snorted, "Yeah right! Poor thing, don't harass him."

The girl handed off her food to the man and playfully began fixing his hair, the smile growing on his face ten fold the more she would joke around.

"She would be content just by staying by his side forever," Naruto stated when Sasuke came back with his food, "without a ring or paper. She's happy."

Sasuke chuckled when the blonde drooled a little over his cup of ramen, "What makes you say that dobe?"

Naruto snapped out of his ramen stupor and smiled lightly as he looked over towards Sasuke's curious face, "I was like that, teme."

The raven shrugged, "You called me possessive so much, I figured…"

The blonde snorted, "Liar."

The Uchiha smirked, "I know."

* * *

Only a half an hour later and the engagement party was in full swing. Kiba couldn't keep up with how many toasts were made, and how many he himself had to make. People still kept rolling in as the day wore on. Sasuke and Naruto kept whispering to each other their wonderment on how so many people could fit in their tiny house. Naruto thanked the gods for the catering company and Sasuke cursed the blonde for throwing the damn party at their house. They hired _no_ such thing as a cleaning crew.

Hinata ended up talking to her cousin Neji while Kiba was talking to Iruka and Sasuke tried to hold off Kakashi and Itachi.

Sasuke froze up at the sharp clap on his shoulder, still not liking anyone but a certain blonde touching him, but relaxed slightly when the hand moved away.

"Say bastard," The raven frowned when Kiba addressed him the way Naruto taught him to, "have you seen blondie?"

The raven turned away from the evil duo whom he had been talking to, thinking that Naruto was with Kiba and frowned.

Kiba turned towards the opened window in which they were near and listened at the sound of hissing and shook his head before clapping Sasuke on the shoulder again.

"Keep the animals at bay. I'll handle him."

Kiba walked by Hinata and kissed the back of her head with quick mumbling words of being right back, the girl turning away from her cousin for a moment and nodding her understanding.

The brunette walked out the back door and was hit with a strong sent of paint tacked on with the constant sound of hissing and rattling.

Kiba rounded the corner in the back yard to find the blonde in front of the fence in front of a large piece of plywood, a can of spray paint in one hand and others littering the ground around him.

"You know," Naruto froze and turned around, "if you show Sai, he might stop making references to how small your dick is."

Naruto frowned towards his best friend as he watched him lean against the house and straightened himself up, using his forearm to wipe the sweat off of his forehead.  
"You know, we already tested one theory of freezing hell on this earth, let's not try again so soon."

Kiba's eyes flicked toward the abandoned tie and button up shirt, "You planned this, didn't you?"

Naruto stepped backwards towards his friend and took in the outline of his work, "I was going to do it on your house."

"Huh?"

Naruto let out a laugh, "Yeah, I came home with the paint and Sasuke went right back out and got the plywood."

"Oh damn it all." Kiba grumbled while stomping his foot like a child.

"What?"

Kiba pushed off the house, "Now I have to thank the asshole."

The blonde laughed hard and even had a snort leak through, and looked over when his friend addressed him again, "So, when do you think Shikamaru _is_ going to take the plunge? He's the last one left."

The blonde snorted, "Didn't you hear him? Tomorrow at three."

"He was serious?"

A blonde head nodded, tan arms crossing casually, "Dead serious. Sasuke made reservations at that really nice restaurant _Bone Fish_, and I helped him plan out the proposal."

"And the ring?"

"Believe it or not…he did it on his own."

Kiba let out a low whistle, "Must be damn serious."

Naruto nodded his head toward the work and smiled lightly, "Well?"

Kiba's eyes raked over the outline of the word that popped from the wood, crossing intricately and flowing naturally.  
_  
Congratulations  
_  
"Thanks."

"Think Hinata will like it?" Naruto tilted his head slightly before looking towards his friend.

"Yeah, now that you aren't painting it on our house. She would have fainted, asshole."

"And you would have enjoyed-"

Naruto's sentence was cut off by the lightest of throat clears, obviously made by a woman, and the blonde thought he was going to have to turn around and apologize to Hinata.  
But when he turned around and was faced with a head of pink hair and a shy look from emerald green eyes, he was surprised with himself that he held on to the paint can.

He knew Sakura was going to be at the engagement party. Her, Ino and Hinata had stayed the closest of friends all through college; it still didn't help the fact that Naruto hadn't talked to her in seven years.

Kiba smiled lightly, "Hey Sakura."

She smiled back, "Hinata wants you. Something about Kakashi and handing out condoms."

Naruto smacked a hand to his forehead while Kiba grumbled under his breath, quickly leaving the two alone while muttering death threats as he left.

Sakura waved a pair of batting gloves lightly in the air, "Sasuke said you forgot them inside."

The blonde took a careful step forward and reached out when she outstretched her hand, taking the paint splattered gloves gingerly, "Thanks…why didn't-?"

"I told him I wanted to talk to you."

The blonde absently wondered at that time how quickly he could blow up all the paint cans and kill himself. He had a nice and wonderful life these past seven years, and he didn't want it ruined now.

"Oh…why?" Naruto felt himself wince and was attempted to smack himself again, but refused when he saw Sakura look away.

She had grown up into a beautiful woman. Her hair was no longer long and flowing, but short and cropped to frame her face. Her body had matured and developed; her body tall and lean that would make any model jealous. Her eyes seemed brighter than seven years ago.

Naruto also noticed that she still didn't compare to Sasuke.

"For Hinata…"

The blonde nodded once.

It had been hard on her, feeling torn between her two best friends. She constantly wanted them to try and reconcile, but Sakura wasn't ready, and Naruto had put the past behind him.

"And because I needed to."

The blonde followed that with another slow nod.

He understood. They were ex-crushes, and past all that, they were once friends. The friend part needed to be restored, even if she needed some lame excuse of using someone else like saying it was for Hinata.

She turned back to him, smiling through her awkward face, her hands fumbling nervously in front of her.

"You can paint still…if that will help us get through this."

Naruto felt his mouth pull into and unconscious smile and tugged his gloves on, nodding, "Yeah. The less awkward, the better?"

She giggled, "Yup!"

The blonde turned and walked back towards the piece of wood that was leaned against the fence as he strapped the gloves on, and listened to her light footfalls that followed in his wake and bent down to switch cans and exchange their caps.

"So…" He began for her, "Catch me up on seven years."

Her heard her sit down on the grass behind him, and smiled lightly at the thought of sitting in front of the school years ago.

"Backwards, or forwards?"

Naruto's smile grew. It was like their friendship never died, but only took a long break to get things back on track.

He hummed, glancing over his shoulder and catching sight of her ring finger, "Let's start with backwards missy!"

She giggled, clapping her hands once and holding the gesture, "I got married!"

"Me too."

Naruto turned back to the plywood and went back to coloring with the wild assortment of colors that he had grabbed at random. He'd rather _not_ Sai look at this. Naruto would hear more about how he needed to go to an art class, his low IQ, and his lack of a dick.

She smiled softly, "Hinata told me all about it, she was so excited. I'm really happy for the two of you."

"Thank you."

The two of them looked up to see Sasuke walking towards them, and Naruto's jaw practically dropped to the lawn when the Uchiha sat on the lawn next to the woman.

"What?"

The blonde shook off his stare, holding up the paint can, "You hate the smell."

"I hate the team of your father and my brother more." Sasuke sighed.

"Touché. Go on Sakura-chan."

The girl smiled fondly, "I'm the Dean at Madame Francis now."

The blonde laughed loudly, pulling the hissing can away from the wood, "I'm the principle at Konoha High!"

The two began laughing loudly, Sasuke smirking despite himself, and the two turned when Kiba called out to them, "What's so funny?"

"Irony." Sasuke called back in his usual tone.

Hinata and Kiba joined the queue next; Hinata sitting next to Sakura while Kiba began assisting Naruto by passing him off cans and helping him switch the spray caps.

"Went to college…obviously."

The blonde snorted, "More _diiiirt_."

"You haven't changed one bit!" Sakura giggled.

The blonde made a sweeping motion with the can, laughing when paint sprayed on Kiba's arm. "Naruto! I'm _not_ going through that again!"

Sakura had to ask, "Through _what_ again?"

"Oh Kiba," The blonde waved him off as he went back to the work, "it was a fun ER visit."

Sasuke snorted, "The eye patch made him look like Jack Sparrow's retarded cousin."

The blonde addressed Sakura once more after the group settled from their bout of laughter, "What else?"

"Ino and I were roommates for awhile…"

"And let me tell you Naru, Forehead there is hell to live with." Ino called as she made her way into the backyard.

"You're one to talk, Ino-pig!"

The rest of the group rolled their eyes as Naruto made the finishing touch on the project and stepped back, admiring his work.

The word popped from the wood, the outline in black with the 3-D edge bringing it to life made it stand out against the light tones of white and light purple and baby blue. The tones had been blended together and faded off into each other gently, and off onto the side were two golden bands linked together.

Naruto outstretched his arms, "TA-DA!"

Hinata made her way up to share a one sided hug with the blonde seeing as Naruto's gloves that were strapped on were covered in paint. Kiba thanked him three times before Kakashi stuck his head out the window and announced cake.

Ino linked her arm with Hinata's and the two set off towards the house with Kiba walking behind them, Naruto promising to catch up while Sasuke and Sakura stayed behind.  
Sasuke began to help clean up Naruto's mess while Sakura tapped the blonde on the shoulder.

Naruto turned around quickly, one eyebrow raised like Sasuke always did, "Hm?"

"I wanted to say thank you and at the same time, sorry."

Naruto shook his head, "I'm not-"

"We both did some bad things then and you had the guts to admit your wrongs, fix them and apologize. I'm sorry, Naruto. And thank you, for being one of my best friends and giving me some of my best memories."

The blonde sent her a lopsided smile, "Thank you."

Sakura's emerald green eyes looked over Naruto's shoulder and landed on the Uchiha who was studying a can of paint and smiled. "I'm happy you met him because of me. He's happy. So how about it…friends?"

The blonde let out a laugh, "I think we can manage that."

The girl smiled brightly, "Then we need to go shopping soon. You, Ino, Hinata and I and Temari should come…old times sake."

Naruto dropped the smile, "No skirts, Sakura… I mean it."

She smiled, walking backwards before turning to walk back towards the house, "Maybe Naru-chan!"

"Now what, dobe?" Sasuke asked in his usual tone as he began separating the empty cans from the full cans.

The blonde turned as he began un-strapping his gloves, and walked up to his husband, wrapping his arms around his midsection from behind and humming in contentment.

"I enjoy the rest of my days in happiness with the man I love…"

Sasuke turned halfway in the embrace, "I was referring to after the party…when did Cupid shoot you up?"

Naruto shrugged, letting Sasuke turn and run his hands through his blonde hair, "When Sakura came and reminded me that without her, I wouldn't have found you."

Sasuke pressed his lips against Naruto's forehead, "Tomorrow we'll have been together for seven years."

Naruto smiled, "And married for two."

Sasuke laid another kiss on Naruto's left cheek, "What do you want to do?"

The blonde hummed, "How about I dress up as a school girl, you dress up as a bastard…well…a bastard _student_ and we have a little reminiscing moment. You can be a prick – not too hard for you – and you can drive me around in a towel and nurse me back to health. We can destroy our living room and maybe if I'm lucky I'll snap at you about how dumb you are for not seeing how much I like you…and then we can have a whole big coming out party all over again."

Sasuke snorted as their noses brushed, their lips almost touching, their breaths mingling, "Dobe, if you make me hold a fake boob for a second time in my life…I'll kill you."

The blonde laughed, connecting their lips lightly and pulling back, "I love you, teme."

"Love you too, dobe."

Sasuke unwound his arms and went back to cleaning up after their tender moment, but froze at the sound, oh he knew that sound.

Naruto _snickered_, "On second thought, how about we switch the roles and _you_ wear the skirt?"

All eyes turned on the married couple as the blonde ran screaming through the house as the guests attempted to eat their cake, begging someone to save his life, as his husband was promising to kill him.

* * *

Author's Notes: My boyfriend is really into graffiti, and while he was outback doing a few pieces, I was suddenly inspired. Naruto always did that stuff sloppy and got in trouble, but I thought it would be cool if he did it like the real graffiti artists and used it as a gift.  
- _Bone Fish_ is a real restaurant, and I've never been. But I've heard it's really nice.  
- I hope those of you who read the quote understood its meaning instead of misinterpreting it.  
- Incase you couldn't understand _why_ Naruto wasn't ready for the party, it was because he _knew_ Sakura was going to be there.  
And that's it folks. Once again _thank you_. If any of you are going to _Otakon_, I think I might be going for a day – so send me a PM and I might purposely run into you with a giant hug.  
Love, thank you, and lots of virtual cookies.  
-Nevi


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